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Did your mom love a man even more than your dad whom she eventually married? Or your dad love another?

How did you find out? Why did they choose to marry your other parent instead?

Not about extra marital affairs please.

by Anonymousreply 8January 14, 2022 11:24 PM

My mother was married to a man who died in WW2 before she married my father. My father didn't want me or my brother to know about this man, so we were never told about him until my father died. My father was a drunk and an asshole, though my mother claimed he wasn't like that when she married him, so I am sure she must have wondered about what she lost in her first husband dying. My bother and I already knew that my mother had been married before we were told because we found the marriage license of my parents with my mothers married name not her maiden name on the license, but didn't ask her about it figuring she didn't want us to know since she had never told us.

by Anonymousreply 1January 14, 2022 4:56 PM

What an odd question.

by Anonymousreply 2January 14, 2022 5:08 PM

yep--my mom was in love with a Jewish guy. He couldn't marry her because she wasn't Jewish. She wound up marrying my dad a couple years later--he looked almost exactly like the Jewish guy.

by Anonymousreply 3January 14, 2022 5:13 PM

Same as the experience of r1 here, except my mother's first husband was killed in the Korean War. She had no children with him. I didn't find out until I was 21, when she told me as I was getting ready to move away, although we never discussed it in depth. It kind of explained why she was a miserable person overall for the rest of her life, with rarely a kind word for anyone. I think she simply felt wronged and never got over it.

by Anonymousreply 4January 14, 2022 5:23 PM

Ok, not my mother but my aunt, who was my father's older sister. My father's family were all Catholic. In the 1950s, my aunt fell in love with a man who was not Catholic and divorced, and he equally fell in love with her. My grandfather forbade her from seeing this guy anymore when he found out he was not Catholic and he was divorced.

Crushed by this, my aunt's boyfriend moved to a different but nearby state. She eventually went to be with him without telling anyone. My grandfather tracked her down, drove to where she was and dragged her back home. She never got over it.

She was an extremely intelligent woman, as was the man with whom she fell in love. To spite my grandfather, my aunt started dating a dumb-as-a-box-of-rocks boxer to spite her father, who always praised her for how smart she was. He protested, but her retort was he's Catholic and a widower, so not divorced, so he meets YOUR strict criteria. She got engaged to the boxer. My grandfather tried over and over to convince her not to marry this man to spite him. She did it anyway, had three kids with the guy, was miserable, turned to alcohol for solace and eventually died fairly young in her 40s of cirrhosis of the liver from excessive drinking. Sad story. I don't know what happened to the man she was in love with. I've always wanted to know but no one in my family ever found out what happened to him.

by Anonymousreply 5January 14, 2022 10:22 PM

My husband did have affection for another (a pint sized harlot in fact)

by Anonymousreply 6January 14, 2022 11:08 PM

Boring. Next?

by Anonymousreply 7January 14, 2022 11:14 PM

Can you stop eating and try to rephrase your question, OP?

by Anonymousreply 8January 14, 2022 11:24 PM
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