Straight men think they’re better looking than they are

One thing I've noticed is the straight guys who think all gay men want to hit on them are always the homely ones....

It's true, R1. I know a very hot straight guy and when gay men flirt with him he's very flattered and not offended.

Could be because we live in a culture where ugly and fat men get with hot women all the time in movies and television. I'd be honestly impressed if I ever saw it the other way around and it wasn't played as a joke.

My straight friends always have really long unkempt fingernails and I hate it.

I agree. I have straight male friends with terrible hygiene, especially maintaining their finger and toe nails. They also don't make an effort to stay in shape, yet expect to hook up with woman who are well groomed and fit.

Duh. Gay are are like women and want to be pretty to atttract partners. Straight men don't care that much about their own looks because they know womaen care more about weath, status and physical strength in men.

R6, I don’t even maintain hygiene and my nails to potentially attract a mate but to not he so gross I can’t stand myself.

[Quote]Duh. Gay are are like women and want to be pretty to atttract partners.

^^ Quite impaired.

This phenomenon totally explains TIMs. How they think they can throw a bodycon dress on their fridgelike frames then cake inches of pancake onto their hairy jowls.

Older men - gay or straight - who were once hot always think they still have it. The gay ones just end up alone.

I remember seeing a OkCupid graph showing that ~60% of their straight male users consider themselves as geniuses, compared with something like 50% of bi men and 30-35% of the remainder groups, that is, gay men and the three corresponding groups of women. Straight men just have thicker skins and bigger egos than the rest of us. Must be why they're less likely to suffer of anxiety or depression.

OP If you haven't figured out why, you don't belong on this site.

Ewwww. Why are gay men friends with the grossest straight men? Why are you friends with a person with terrible hygiene? I suppose beggars can't be choosers, and clean people won't be friends with you.

I'll never understand why DL is so obsessed with straight guys, most are terrible. They really do think they're superior to everyone else.

Also, most are terribly groomed!

[quote]Straight men just have thicker skins and bigger egos

Straight men are giant babies. Bigger egos, thinner skin.

Not just straight men, gay men aren't any less vain

R15 I don't agree with the thin skin part. You can ruin a woman's day by calling her ugly, and I suspect gay men mught be similar. That is being thin skinned. Straight men, in contrast, can just shrug off opinions they dislike because of their tendency to think highly of themselves. As I said before, they do show less anxiety and depression, which indicates ego strength on their part.

OP- I've encountered plenty of gay men over the years who had an attitude and shouldn't have- They were average looking. Having an attitude DOESN'T make you HOT.

I once went to a book reading of Andrew Holleran at the LGBT center in NYC. Hardly anyone had arrived. I asked this person sitting there a question- This queen gives me an attitude like I'm flirting with him- DELUDED QUEEN. He was average and forgettable looking.

R17 They are more relaxed about their looks, but try to mock their lack of success, their sexual abilities and the quality of their car and you will see they are sensitive like the rest.

Most straight White men don't put in the extra effort to look good because they know they don't have to. It is not critical to their success.

Gay men (and minorities) know they need to look their best to be as personally and professionally successful as possible. Queerness in some way always comes into question in the work place (even though it should not). This is true even in stereotypically "gay" jobs. A gay is not given the same benefit of the doubt that is afforded a straight White man. A gay has to use everything he has.

Because everyone knows looks usually play a role in work place success, straight White men (who don't look good) tend to diminish the extent looks plays in their own success. They see themselves as the exception and assume that they are at least average and are more likely to attribute their success to their ABILITIES over others as opposed to them being a straight White male as a significant factor in their success!

On a personal level, gay men fuck each other purely based on lust. If you want the hot guy then you better put in some effort or his eye (and body) is definitely gonna wander.

Although a straight man is trying to get the best woman he can, a lot of them (especially the less attractive ones) are grateful to get some pussy. They will subconsciously settle but thinking they scored big. Women will fuck an ugly man if he fulfills the social contract she is trying to establish for herself. The man thinks his looks are part of why she is with him and she will (as all women know is required) feed his ego. He is clueless.

So yeah, men are not the best at assessing their looks which is why it is funny that a lot of straight men think that gay men resort to dating men because they can't get a woman. LOL These ugly straight men would get a harsh reality check if they ever tried to enter the gay world.

Straight guy here. I don't have a high opinion of my looks AT THE PRESENT TIME. I am very overweight and am working to fix it. However, when I was in shape, I must say, I'd fuck myself and enjoy it. 🤷‍♂️

Straight men don't have thicker skin. Maybe they do about their looks, but not their financial and professional success. My sister runs a very successful business and her success drives my ex brother-in-law insane. He is constantly tearing down my sister to their kids. He'll never get over her dumping him and being more successful than him.

Like you have ever "known" a straight man in your life, OP. Tell us more fairy tales.

A confident, masc gay man who is average looking will get far more attention on the gay scene than anyone else.

As anyone familiar with the world of gay dating knows.

Straight mens' appeal is never purely visual. There are plenty of straight men who simply somewhat better than average but they know that attitude turns on potential partners.

R23 I assume that the OP's father is straight. I also imagine that he has other straight relatives, coworkers, neighbors, etc.

They are goals!

As if any of you can even begin to comprehend what makes straight men tick.

R6 sounds like a Russian troll farmer

R28 Why Russian, do you think you don’t have enough homophobes in US?

I find the straight guy mentality is what causes homophobia. Most (not all but most) straight men think all women are into them, or gettable. So they apply this logic to us. All gay men must think all straight men are into them, or gettable when it is not the case.

R29 Except R6 wasn’t even homophobic. Let me rephrase: Men regardless of their orientation want good looks in their partners but women value status, wealth and protection more than good looks. That why gay men must care more about their looks if they want to attract partners than straight men.

Straight men give no fucks for their appearance. It is only trashy gay guys who obsess about it.

Because masculinity trumps everything. It's priceless; you can't fake it or buy it.

OP you sound like a pathetically broke twink.

Exactly, R33. Straight men's masculinity is a big turn on.

R35 I think a gay man’s masculinity is more attractive, as they have sex with men. I really appreciate my straight mates, but I didn’t become close to them because of their masculinity. Even thinking two of them are rather good looking; I don’t find them attractive like that.

Those two I think are fine fit specimens, especially tor their age, happen to be extremely humble, and don’t believe they’re handsome at all. Not all men are alike, gay, straight, or bisexual. OP must onow some real egomaniacs:

All of my high school friends are straight. We have stayed close over 20 years. We get together twice a year. Last time was in Chicago and one of my friends asked me (drunk of course) if I ever had a crush on him. I laughed and told him no, I was never really attracted to my friends. He didn't believe me, then asked me who I was attracted to in high school. I told him I was basically hooking up with one guy, who was a year ahead of us, a wrestler. His jaw dropped because the guy I hooked up with kind of a loner nobody socially. He was fascinated that I was not all horned up and trying to go for all my friends (who were all football players as I was I). I told him my guy was my type, shy quiet with a dick of death. He was just shocked I was not trying to blow every guy in school.

Some straight guys will choose food, booze, gaming and/or TV over being in shape. And they won't even question themselves about it until they get a health scare. It also doesn't seem to occur to some of them that not all guys can carry off baldness and be hot with it. These ones just don't care about being hot. Or even presentable. Plenty of taller versions of George Costanza out there feeling entitled to date supermodels.

And still there are plenty of gay men who prefer them to a man who checks the mirror every few minutes…

You don’t get it, R38z

Nothing is more attractive and alluring than the effortless traditional masculinity that straight guys possess. NOTHING! Most gay guys try too hard in that area. They wind up overcompensating and just come off as tragic. Give me a straight 6 over a gay 9 any day of the week.

[quote]Straight men give no fucks for their appearance

Total bullshit.

If they didn't care they wouldn't go to the gym.

Some of you are fucking retarded.

R40 Truth.

[quote]Give me a straight 6 over a gay 9 any day of the week.

Someone who would beat the shit out of you and never fuck you which automatically makes them bi or gay?

the gay guys on this site who think all gay men are exactly like them in every way because they share that single attribute are pathetic. You hate all gay men because you hate your pathetic self.

R44 no, we just hate hissing queens like you, dearie.

This thread is so interesting! Gay men are way hotter than straight men. Duh.

Both are born equal but I find gay men are more willing to accept the truth about themselves and will try to improve if they can.

R47 totally

R48, that person calls themselves Jessica now. Google Jessica Alves

[quote] doesn't seem to occur to some of them that not all guys can carry off baldness and be hot with it.

More than you believe....

R37 LOL. Not one word you said is true, troll.

R45 : again assuming everyone who is gay is like you in every other way just because you share that one minor attribute.

R21, are you really straight? Why on Earth are you on this site? 🧐

Let your true colors shine you big, fat fag! 🕺

actually there was a study done on this and men do think they are better looking than they are

I would argue that ALL men think they are better at everything than they really are.

You guys got some weird hormones that give you magical thinking. I am sure that is very useful for you personally at times and very useful for a society at times. I mean you need to have some magical thinking to go slay a woolly mammoth and go into battle. So, hey, thanks for that.

[quote]I would argue that ALL men think they are better at everything than they really are.

It's a men who fuck the opposite sex thing. They have ego issues because they've been coddled their whole lives.

I don’t think so- they tend not to think as much about the way they look as gay men- but they’re “catching up”.

Straight men constantly misinterpret women being nice or polite (even when the guy is a creep and the woman is just afraid of pissing him off) as flirting, so it's no surprise they would think the same about gay men.

Women are much better at picking up cues from people. People would condescendingly call it female intuition. It is but it's because women can access both sides of their brain better than men can making them able to process an observation more fully all at once. I call that a form of intelligence that doesn't get enough credit because it is a female superpower.

R58 THANK YOU. So glad someone said this.

It’s so true—the times I have flattered or indulged a man’s ego because he was making me uncomfortable or I wanted him to leave me alone....

One of the great things about being male is that we generally are laid back, largely because we don’t pick up on a lot of the subtle cues and messages that women and effeminate men do. We dont read drama and stuff into every little comment or action, and we are therefore, more chill about little stuff

Women = drama laden bitch hysteria

Men = laid back

Ive gotten un trouble for saying this in the past but the truth is I am just not attracted to most gay men at all. If there’s any hint of effeminacy or gay voice and I completely shut down.

Straight men are much more attractive than gay men, if you are attracted to true masculinity. I also believe a lot of gay men are in denial about their gender identity. At gay bars when you see these super girly men with extreme gay voice referring to each other in female pronouns, while being strict bottoms and only wanting masculine tops themselves...

Clearly these types of gay men would be better off as trans women.

It's all that adulation from fraus and karens.

[quote]actually there was a study done on this and men do think they are better looking than they are

You can't measure how good looking someone is in a study.

There are plenty of gay men who look good in a profile pic and but can't get a second date because we have a purse in our mouths. I'm one of them.

Straight men's looks come from not caring about their looks.

OP's stereotype varies wildly based on social class, status, profession and area of the country.

So while Silicon Valley engineers and Flyoverstani Walmart employees may not be all that concerned about their looks (or their fingernails), all the straight finance bros on Wall Street and the straight studio execs in LA are 100% focused on how they look, how much they work out, possibly as much as circuit party style homosexuals.

I've also found that good looking straight guys often seek each other out in a social setting where no one previously knows each other (freshman orientation, first day on a new job, etc.) -- sort of an instinctive bonding thing.

Many DLers, as others have noted, are both hyper effeminate and older, meaning they grew up at a time when straight men just didn't have gay friends (and vice versa) and so they will tend to fetishize straight men or view them as "Others" as those DLers are often lumped in with the women at any social gathering.

And most guys, gay or straight, think they are better looking than they are.

As for the study R65, it's easy to do.

What they did was ask women to assess a guy's looks and then ask him for a self-assessment and then compare the two numbers

Women are attracted by good looks, same as everyone else. Where women and to a lesser extent gay men differ from straight men, at least, is that they will quickly lose interest in a person who has nothing to offer but looks.

The incredibly weird thing about straight men is that if a woman is beautiful... they will put up with any amount of shit from her! They literally don't care if a female partner is batshit crazy, hates the kids from the first marriage or his entire family, kicks the dog, abuses or isolates him, etc. Tell him she's a psycho and he needs to run, and he'll just shrug and say something like "Nobody's perfect", and stay for a few more years. Of course eventually most come to the point of realizing the relationship isn't making them happy and leaving, but in the meantime, they just act like the craziness and abuse doesn't matter.

I guess it's the "ego strength" mentioned above, if they're aware their partner is mean or crazy, they still think they're in control and it's not a problem.

R63, a lot of gay men say the same thing. Openly. You’re not as unique or shocking as you think you are.

[quote]What they did was ask women to assess a guy's looks and then ask him for a self-assessment and then compare the two numbers

If you read my post you'd know that how we view people's looks depends on how we view them in person -- their voice, their mannerism, their attitude.

A study would also show gay men would rate a masc man over a fem one even if they're otherwise identical.

Fems are embarrassing to be seen with in public

The femmes are an embarrassment. Sure, everyone with their PC bullshit applauds the femmes because they are being their authentic selves, but the truth is that nobody wants to fuck them or be seen associating with them.

Straight women, even good looking ones, are often seen with unattractive men. With women, looks aren't as important...not like a straight man with straight women. Men are naturally taken in by physical attractiveness...whether it's women or men. I think that's why gay men are very attuned to their appearance...because they want to be attractive to men.

"Clearly these types of gay men would be better off as trans women."

Why should they, when they can be themselves and get laid, as men? Why the hell should they let themselves in for a life of surgery, hormones, and trying to not admit that the paid-for vag isn't as desirable as a natural one?

No, what the FUCK is wrong with any gay person, who drinks the Kool-Aid and tells butch women and femme men to transition, instead of telling them AND the entire world that they're wonderful just the way they are! Femme men are our siblings, our compatriots, our friends and sometimes lovers, and sometimes, our goddamn heroes. They're the ones who can't hide from homophobia so they're the ones who deal with it head-on, however they could. They should be proud and we should be proud of them, not telling them to transition to fit in.

Damn it, R63-- you should have put a Trigger Warning on your post.

R74

MARY

In the same vein as OP's observation, many femme gay men don't seem to realize how they come off.

A few years ago I was watching an interview with a guy (he was, funny enough, one of the guys responsible for the US version of Queer As Folk) and he was talking about how he had this friend who was super femme and how he realized that he was often embarrassed to be seen in public with this guy and how he was ashamed of that in retrospect.

And I am watching this thinking "Whoa!! There is someone out there more femme than you? Mind blown!"

So it;'s all relative

In the gay male world, masculine, young, athletic, good looking tops are at the top of the sexual desirability hierarchy. In the straight male world, feminine, young, skinny, beautiful women are most desired.

While many gay men and straight men chase these respective ideals for both hookups and dating, few actually land the “ideal” and have to settle.

Gay and straight men have opposite challenges when it comes to sex. Most gay men are not masculine, and are also bottoms looking for tops, which are in short supply. Most straight men are naturally “tops”, looking for women who are naturally “bottoms”, but are not easy to hookup with.

Oh wow

R75, I recognize its a controversial viewpoint, but so many gay men clearly want to be women. They can deny it all they want but deep down, if they are being completely honest with themselves, their “souls” are feminine, and yet they have male bodies.

It is not an insult to recognize and admit a person’s gender identity doesn’t match their actual gender. Of course this doesn’t describe every gay man, nor the bi ones content and confident in their masculinity.

[quote]What they did was ask women to assess a guy's looks and then ask him for a self-assessment and then compare the two numbers

Link please

Was there any control for the fact that men are more likely rate all things positively and that individuals rate themselves more positively than others?

Cos this sounds like something you just pulled out of your cunt.

Actually, I don’t think some straight guys realize how hot they are. How many times have you seen a good looking guy with a skank? They wouldn’t be with a skank if they knew their true worth (to me).

[quote]I guess it's the "ego strength" mentioned above, if they're aware their partner is mean or crazy, they still think they're in control and it's not a problem.

"Arrogance" is what it is.

[quote]I recognize its a controversial viewpoint, but so many gay men clearly want to be women.

No. Being a woman means having a female reproductive system. It has nothing to do with clothing or behaviour unless the behaviour directly involves the reproductive system. So many gay men do NOT want to possess a female reproductive system. So many gay men do not want to be women. The only reason you think this, if you're gay, is because there's something about you that scares away any guy you would be attracted to and also attracts negative attention from the types of guys you aren't. When I say negative attention I mean ridicule.

All straight guys need is some booze and they start acting all sissified.

There are more women than men so straight men will always have an advantage even if they're ugly and fat.

This article talks about one of the many studies done that show men think they are better looking than women perceive them to be, along with the methodology.

R75, if a female gay man wants to be desired by all men, straight or gay, it doesn't make him a woman. It makes him a femme gay man.

A woman is an adult human with XX chromosomes, and the secondary sexual characteristics and organs that go with that, a man or a woman are not mindsets or behavior patterns. Men and women naturally vary in their gender presentation, so quit with trying to jam them all into the same two stupid limiting boxes.

There's a huge number of women who aren't attracted to hypermasculinity. That explains why they like completely different male types than gay men do. Those types include gay bottoms.

I used to work with a straight guy who seriously resembled Riff Raff from Rocky Horror but without the hump. He assumed women were constantly flirting with him because he was tall and blonde. It never seemed to occur to him that he was weird looking.

Laughing at whoever remarked upthread that straight guys are so much more "chill" than homosexuals and lesbians, or even straight ladies. Right, sure. Because we're the ones who go into violent rages when we're dumped, when our ex-boyfriends (or girlfriends) start dating or marry someone else, when another person gets the job we feel we're entitled to have, when someone passes us in the slow lane, when we can't get laid, when we've just "had enough" or "had a bad day" or are "hearing voices" (funny how often straight guys hear them and they convince them to kill large groups of people yet gays and straight ladies don't have that ish!), rape people, or start wars. But, yeah. Aside from all of THAT, I agree! Straight guys are chill as fuck.

This is true. Butt ugly straight men and/or complete losers always think they can get good looking women. Women are repulsed by this.

I used to work with a guy who propositioned me. I didn’t want to get involved with somebody at work, so I turned him down. We were not flirty at all. This was really out of left field.

I asked him why he asked me. He said one out of ten women would say yes, so based on statistics, he would basically ask any female anywhere if they would fuck him. I don’t know if that theory was true, but he was constantly fucking on the side and his wife dumped him not long after, with two very small kids. I guess that could be a sign of “success.”

The most laid back people are lesbians.

R94 Not always, but I’m a fan.

Yes, lesbians tend to be laid back relative to other women, but I think the average dude is more chill overall

Women don't want to marry hypermasculine guys. They prefer to settle down with "less manly" guys because they are less likely to cheat than hypermasculine guys. However, they want to fuck the hypermasculine ones. Studies have shown that when women are fertile/ovulating, their attraction to hypermasuline men is increased, since these guys are seen as having superior genetics to pass on to children.

R37 I can totally relate to your story. I lust over all kinds of men (gay and straight). But, I only have a handful of people that I consider to be "friends" and I don't lust after them.

The friend zone is a real thing for me and once he goes into that zone, he's not coming out of it. I've never pursued a male friend (gay or straight). It's like the closer I get to him as a "friend," the less I notice his looks (if he's good looking) and the less I'm attracted to him (if I was initially). They feel more like family, so the vibe is different. It is hard to describe.

My straight friends are not conceited, but they are attractive (I don't even have to be interested in them sexually to see that).

Ugly straight guys tend to not know how ugly they are. Even the ugliest ones think they look good or are at least average.

R87’s article is bullshit, as expected.

Mostly because men are more easily attracted to women than women, who are fussy and snobbish, are to men.

[quote] The most laid back people are lesbians.

Lol

I just read an article that said gay men are more likely to have gay sex.

I read an article that said lesbians are more likely to commit crime

I read an article that said the average lesbian actually looks like a straight man.

I remember that one, R103!

I think it had something to do with AI.

R98 Interesting! And so, you would say you are: ugly, average-looking, super good-looking, or top 1%! Just checking....

[quote] Could be because we live in a culture where ugly and fat men get with hot women all the time in movies and television. I'd be honestly impressed if I ever saw it the other way around and it wasn't played as a joke.

That stupid trope seemed to die down for a bit. It's looks like it's coming back with this upcoming show with Josh Gad and Isla Fisher.

It's because women don't chose mates based on physical appearance -- as already explained -- but men do.

LIES!!!I have been admiring gorgeous men who turned out gay, like forever!!

Carry on!

R88 Not true at all. A woman is a adult human who identifies as a woman.

R105 Why do you care what I look like? Why don't you post a self-portrait so we can see what you look like?

None of that is relevant to the conversation.

I hate when douche bags come on here with nothing to say about the topic of the thread but simply want to troll other posters.

Get a life jackass!

come to the conclusion in recent years that pretty much everything that straight men think and believe is wrong from football plays all the way up to gender Id.

R112 agree!

come to the conclusion in recent years that pretty much everything that straight women think and believe is wrong from football plays all the way up to gender Id.

Straight men are amazing. The effortless masculinity they possess is intoxicating. It's almost as if they're a different species from gay men, such as myself. I don't have that internal sense of masculinity. I'm not aggressive or assertive, and I feel that I betray my inner core when I try to be, and I am drawn to more traditionally female hobbies and interests. It's natural to be attracted to "the other". I view straight guys as "the other", thus my attraction to them.

[quote] I am drawn to more traditionally female hobbies and interests.

Traditionally-female? Like getting burned at the stake? Or suicidally facing down a Roman army? Or forming your own island salon-society of artistic lesbians?

Like lying about being raped for attention.

Such as flower arranging and knitting. I'm learning to crochet at the moment as well. I also make high-quality costume jewelry.

R116 likes pretending she doesn't know what traditionally female means.

But she does when it suits her.

R117 paydirt, found the creepy woman-hating incel troll.

You guys really smoke yourselves out, it’s too easy.

R115 Yeah, even things as simple as throwing on a backwards hat. If I did it, I'd make it fruity somehow.

Gay men try way too hard to be masculine. It's really all an act. Even the ones who can get away with it let their inner gurl out when they have a little too much to drink. I've said it before and I'll keep saying it...most gay men are emotionally/psychologically women but with testosterone.

[quote]Gay men try way too hard to be masculine. It's really all an act. Even the ones who can get away with it let their inner gurl out when they have a little too much to drink.

Yep.

You'll see them on any dating app. Baseball caps, some mention of sports... if you ever talk to them for more than twenty minutes they'll be yass kweening Britney Spears.

R122 Speak for yourself, I am the masculinity impersonated.

Look at Anderson Cooper on that New Year's Eve thing. Every little thing he does is just so cute. Does he seem "gay" though? I think he's really good-looking in a low-key way, but gay, alas.

Look at that Colton whatshisface. In photos he looks like the prototype of straight, masculine all-American jock that we all drooled over in high school and college. But then he opens his mouth and the entire Macy's purse department comes tumbling out. That's ALWAYS a disappointment and a dick wilter.

[quote] In the same vein as OP's observation, many femme gay men don't seem to realize how they come off.

I've gone out with a couple who appeared to have no clue they had the same vibe as Paul Lynde.

As for myself, in school I was a quiet, thin artist with no interest in sports so I always assumed everyone figured me out at first glance. Apparently the combo of putting on some weight and getting into hockey in my 20s made me almost invisible to gaydar. I still get asked occasionally why I haven't settled down yet, and my response is along the lines of "I'm a never-married fiftysomething man in the Bible Belt who loves painting, theatre, and cats—you do the math!"

[Quote]But then he opens his mouth and the entire Macy's purse department comes tumbling out.

HAHAHAHAHA!

R126 That is why I tell my friends to ALWAYS talk to a guy on the phone before hooking up with him.

If you are a woman or a gay man looking for a masculine man then you want someone that exudes confidence. A straight man does not have "Gay voice" (which does not exude confidence). This is part of the reason Straight men think they look so good. It is the confidence - which is an aphrodisiac.

Pictures can be staged. You cannot always tell whether he has "gay face" or feminine mannerisms from looking at pictures. Facetime is ideal but many men won't do that. But he should be willing to talk on the phone or forget him.

You can learn more from talking to a guy than any other way.

"Gay voice" is a definite NO for me! LOL

I rather have my wisdom teeth removed with a pair of pliers and no anesthesia than be subjected to even a minute of listening to someone with gay voice. That voice--and we all know what it is--is unbearable.

R128 Straight guys have "gay voices" too. Like Shawn Mendes.

[quote]Straight guys have "gay voices" too. Like Shawn Mendes.

Gurl...

Some straight men genuinely think they make better women than actual female humans.

That is enough to disregard their self-assessment skills.

[Quote]Straight guys have "gay voices" too. Like Shawn Mendes.

R131 No honey. They don't.

"Gay voice" is a very specific sound that only comes from a gay man's throat. LOL A straight man can have a high pitched voice or even sound slightly effeminate without having "gay voice." R129 is right, we all know it when we hear it.

Ross Matthews an extreme version of gay voice (but of course there are other versions of it too).

R133 That is why I put air quotes. It is this effeminate high pitched voice that some straight men have, like mentioned Shawn Mendes

R134, I don't know the sexual orientation of Shawn Mendes but he doesn't have gay voice. If he had gay voice he wouldn't have girlfriends. "Gay Voice" screams to the world I am gay and (probably wanna be a woman). LOL This man is not an example of "gay voice."

I meant this.

R127 You sound swell Mat. (smart as well)

R136 Sweetie that is not gay voice.

R133 Ok, when you compare it to the guy at video you posted it is not gay voice, only high pitched. But this guy has a woman voice really.

R138 We have a misunderstanding, obviously you call gay voice a voice that sounds like real female voice, I thought about male high pitched voices.

Good, then our Shawn is straight and has a straight male voice.

The American gay accent (as opposed to the gay voice exemplified above) bears a strong resemblance to the standard regional accent in parts of Mississippi and Louisiana.

But how can a male produce such sound like the one at R133. God, I am very tolerant, but I couldn't be attracted to a guy with such a voice. Sorry.

R139 Do you think Shawn Mendes has a high pitched voice? He is a singer but not really a tenor (which if you know vocal ranges - tenors usually have high speaking voices to accommodate singing high).

I am not defending Shawn Mendes. Like I said, I don't know his sexuality, but I can think of dozens of YOUNG guys who sound just like him who are not gay. That is probably how 75 % of young Canadian and American English speaking White-ish guys sound. LOL This is pretty standard.

When you hear"Gay voice" there is no question in anyone's mind that the speaker is gay or at the very least HIGHLY suspect. LOL I don't get that impression from Mendes and a lot of other people would not leap to that conclusion either - without more information.

R140 That is a good way to put it.

R140 To be clear though there are many examples of gay voice. There is no way to pinpoint it for every version of gay voice, but we know it when we hear it.

[quote]One of the great things about being male is that we generally are laid back, largely because we don’t pick up on a lot of the subtle cues and messages that women and effeminate men do. We dont read drama and stuff into every little comment or action, and we are therefore, more chill about little stuff

The word you are actually looking for is 'obtuse'. Or maybe just 'slow'. That would work, too.

R145 wins this thread!

I could never date a HK queen. They all look like linebackers and sound like Long Island fishwives. Femme guys are repulsive enough, but nothing is more of a turnoff than a muscle mary. The muscles reek of desperate overcompensation. Total boner killer. When straight guys develop muscles, at least the attitude/mannerisms/voice go with the muscles. Musclebound straight guys are the top of the sexual food chain.

[Quote]Musclebound straight guys are the top of the sexual food chain.

Unless their peens shrivel up and quit working due to all the roids... Then they are bitter and mad at the world and you see them alone at the gym muttering to themselves in a roid trance as they lift weights.

The recent postings are so pathetic.

You think because someone else is gay they're exactly like you. Not the case.

I think this is what happens when you're one of those unfortunate guys who is just gross. Gross when they were young. Gross now.

You think all gay men are pigeon toed useless retards who like to crochet just because that's what you are. Fucking sad. I feel sorry for you. You've never been able to attract anyone but the most desperate and that's what you end up thinking all gay men are like. Bad examples. Wow.

I can see you now. Drooling onto the floor as you feed some straight victim his 10th beer so you can rape him after he passes out, because you're so deluded you think that because no one you find attractive has ever hit on you because gay men could never be what you're attracted to.

News flash. The reason why you have never met anyone gay that you're attracted to is because you aren't attractive to them. They avoid you like the plague. There's something wrong with you. You are not what the guys you like want. You're probably too big. Too fat. Or too dangerous -- too much of a problem in public, you attract to much negative attention.

Fucking sad.

[Quote]I could never date a HK queen.

R147 What is an HK queen?

A lot of sentiments here validate what I have always believed - gay men are not “real” men. And most gay men don’t think of themselves as such, despite their protestations to the contrary. Most gay men actively prefer and seek out masculine, straight guys, aka tops, for hookups.

This isnt a condemnation. But its annoying when people try to pretend your average gay male is no different from the average straight male - truly, authentically masculine like a straight male, interested in team sports, a natural “top” or or desire to be the insertive partner in sex, because its just not the case.

There ARE differences, and there are I believe a significant number of gay men who would choose to transition if there was no stigma, minimal financial burden, no family or career rejection, etc.

[quote] A lot of sentiments here validate what I have always believed - gay men are not “real” men. And most gay men don’t think of themselves as such, despite their protestations to the contrary.

True. Us gay men don’t regard ourselves as the authority on masculinity.

This is in contrast to dykes who somehow regard themselves as more woman than straight women.

[quote] The word you are actually looking for is 'obtuse'. Or maybe just 'slow'. That would work, too.

Those words would work for you, because you didn’t actually read the post. Maybe you have womanbrain and can’t figure it out but for the capable among us: men pick up on social cues fine; women actively look for hidden meanings in everything.

"A lot of sentiments here validate what I have always believed - gay men are not “real” men."

Oh, bullshit. Most straight or masculine men are phonies who spend their lives trying to act butch, to do what's expected of a man, to avoid criticism from his fellow men by conforming to society's expectations for a masculine man, to live by the Guy Code, and to walk around believing that if he ever does anything feminine his dick will fall off. There's fear and insecurity underlying the supposedly effortless confidence of manly men, the fear that they don't measure up, the fear that others will pick up that they aren't really as manly as they pretend to be, that it's all an act... and they try to head off their fears with conformity.

Femme men are the ones who have the fucking balls to say "Screw society's rules and expectations for men!"! They're the brave ones, the ones who are willing to be themselves even if dipshits like you condemn and revile them, and you'd realize that if you'd ever thought about men and masculinity with your big head and not the little one.

[quote] Most straight or masculine men are phonies who spend their lives trying to act butch

I see way more gay men who try to act butch than straight men who just are.

I agree that fem gay men are brave though. They have it tougher than anyone. Butch lesbians don’t get any pushback like we do.

Idk about that r156. My bi sister said women in the service industry are ruder to her since she cut her hair really short. I think straight people get really uncomfortable/angry when someone doesn't fit into their idea of how a man or woman should act.

R157 I read an article about a butch lesbian an how she has constantly been the target of contempt and prejudice. A friend who is mainstream looking lesbian said she never had that problems, even when people knew she was living with a woman.

In Australia, especially regional and rural Australia, most of the men are really masculine, manly, and physically strong. They've got that natural masculine swagger too. Because of my life I've had as a gay man, it's come with a lot of stress. I've still got so much stress in my life. Because of that.I sometimes feel inadequate when I see masculine men so chill all the time. They have so many male friends and everything seems effortless with them.

I don't care about fitting in with the masculine and chill boys club but sometimes I wish I could chill with them and chill like them.

Bump