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We went through surrogacy to become dads. I was diagnosed with postnatal depression.

I was raised Roman Catholic. It was a huge part of my childhood. I quite enjoyed it, but I had a lot of internalized homophobia that I carried with me through most of my life.

A big part of that was my inability to see a future that involved me being extremely happy. As a gay child, I had visions of a lifetime of lies. I told myself: "I'll be closeted, marry a woman, and have children with her. If I'm not able to fake it till I make it, I'll become a priest."

When I came out and was accepted by my family, and when we walked away from the church, I realized that everyone would love me the same and I'd be able to be happy. I didn't have to lie.

When I moved to New York at 21 and met Josh, I didn't want children. There had been too many people telling me that I wasn't welcome in that community for me to want to be a part of it.

It took six years of living in a city that was supportive, diverse, and multicultural to see a different kind of life.

At that time, we thought adoption was the only option for gay people, so we started going to adoption agencies and seminars to learn everything we could. During that journey, a girlfriend from university reached out and asked if we had ever considered surrogacy. She told me she was carrying a baby for someone else from a different country. My mind was blown. I didn't know what surrogacy was.

From that moment on, it was hard to see another option. We continued down the adoption journey, but a year later we got a phone call from a female member of my family who said, "I'd like to give you my eggs." That was the beginning of when my entire life changed. That was the greatest gift that I could have ever been given.

We were placed with a surrogate from Minnesota, a mother who already had three children. We first talked to her and her husband on Skype. They were excited about the possibility of helping another family, specifically a gay couple.

On September 10, 2017, we got a text message: "I think I'm going into labor." We had already packed all our bags. We started driving to the airport and got the first flight out.

When we landed, we were an hour away from the hospital. She was going into labor, and we were getting texts from her husband. We were about six minutes away when we got a text: "You have a son." Then a minute after that, "You have a daughter."

I continuously look back at those times and look at my children and think, "I can't believe that I'm living a completely 'normal' life that I never ever thought was possible." It's completely because of two selfless women. It's beautiful.

My husband was offered a job in Australia, and we moved when the twins were 2 months old. I moved to a new country and culture that I didn't understand. I think people anticipate that moving to another predominantly English-speaking, developed nation is going to be the same. No ma'am. It's completely different food, entertainment, and news sources. People act differently. On top of that, not having any friends and leaving my job to be a full-time parent were traumatizing.

I was diagnosed with postnatal depression six months after the kids were born. I completely lost myself for the first four months that I moved here. I was set on being a perfect stay-at-home father and was sure I was going to be great at it. Then nothing turned out that way. I was bad at it.

I was angry at my husband for making us move across the world. I missed my mom. I lost my sense of identity. I hated talking about kids. All anyone wanted to know was how the kids were. No one cared about me. No one wanted to talk about politics or entertainment. It was like all of a sudden, I had become a void of a human.

I lost the plot, and I spiraled. The good news was that my husband put his hand up and said, "I think we need to get some help."

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by Anonymousreply 217March 11, 2023 4:49 PM

I woke up after six months of treatment, therapy, and support from Josh's parents, and I decided I needed to get back into advertising. I needed to find that connection to who I was in a new country. I raised my hand and said, "I can't be a stay-at-home father." From when they turned 1 until they turned 4, I was obsessed with being a stay-at-home parent and being like all the moms that I knew. When I realized that script wasn't relevant to me, then the rest of the journey, of rewriting and deciding what worked for me, was fun. It was fun to say: "You know what? I can't be a stay-at-home parent, so I'm going to go back to work."

I feel like there's a script, and we all fall prey to it. A lot of my journey, of being so unhappy to the point of needing help and then coming out on the other side, was realizing I don't have to play that game. All parents have the ability to decide what's going to work for them. You're allowed to say: "This is what I want to be a part of. This is what I don't."

by Anonymousreply 1December 27, 2021 8:59 PM

Okay, I'm confused.

How does a gay man who uses a surrogate, end up with "post natal depression?"

That's just fucking crazy.

by Anonymousreply 2December 27, 2021 9:00 PM

yuck

by Anonymousreply 3December 27, 2021 9:00 PM

Why are gay men trying so hard to act like straight couples?

It really makes me sick.

by Anonymousreply 4December 27, 2021 9:07 PM

He's depressed, like millions of people and millions of parents, and he has added the "post-natal" to make himself feel, as a gay father of surrogate kids, like a trailblazer and to give his sadly common story a lame twist that might generate clicks. I'm glad he's feeling better, but I don't want to read any more of his exhausting updates...

by Anonymousreply 5December 27, 2021 9:08 PM

Our den mother should try popping one out, before he bloviates about this shite. A lesbian friend once told me if men could give birth, abortion would be a sacrament.

by Anonymousreply 6December 27, 2021 9:10 PM

He should have depression for exploiting an woman‘s body and taking away her baby.

by Anonymousreply 7December 27, 2021 9:11 PM

I experienced this. I'm a GWM. Right after my nephew was born, whenever I babysat him, and I was rocking him to sleep in his room, I would get super depressed and start crying. I don't know why I was feeling that way. It really disturbed me. It took me about a year to break the cycle and stop feeling so overwhelmed with depression every time I got him ready for bed. I think it was the realization that i'll never have one of my own and I always wanted children.

by Anonymousreply 8December 27, 2021 9:12 PM

The medical profession should be ashamed.

by Anonymousreply 9December 27, 2021 9:12 PM

Postnatal depression is a temporary thing.

by Anonymousreply 10December 27, 2021 9:14 PM

Oh for fuck’s sake just reban gay marriage if this is what we’re going to get.

by Anonymousreply 11December 27, 2021 9:14 PM

I think he meant 'post-nasal depression'.

by Anonymousreply 12December 27, 2021 9:14 PM

[quote] I experienced this. I'm a GWM. Right after my nephew was born, whenever I babysat him, and I was rocking him to sleep in his room, I would get super depressed and start crying.

Poor Uncle Bottom, weeping while cradling baby Joel.

by Anonymousreply 13December 27, 2021 9:14 PM

I can't lie, I hope they die.

by Anonymousreply 14December 27, 2021 9:15 PM

In other words, he's an attention whore - and - taking care of an infant absolutely sucks.

by Anonymousreply 15December 27, 2021 9:17 PM

[quote]I experienced this. I'm a GWM. Right after my nephew was born, whenever I babysat him, and I was rocking him to sleep in his room, I would get super depressed and start crying. I don't know why I was feeling that way.

Bored. Left out. Needs attention. Pay attention to me.

by Anonymousreply 16December 27, 2021 9:19 PM

I manage mine with Flonase.

by Anonymousreply 17December 27, 2021 9:20 PM

[quote] I think he meant 'post-nasal depression'.

I’ve been there but it’s usually involved a long weekend and an eight ball.

by Anonymousreply 18December 27, 2021 9:20 PM

I thought the post natal depression thing was a hormonal issue? But, I could see the overwhelming stress of infant care inducing depression.

by Anonymousreply 19December 27, 2021 9:21 PM

It's the realization that there are no more Circuit Parties, no more Palm Springs Orgies, no more Surprise Anal, no more Grindr Pump-n-Dump hook ups, no more road trips to Wrigleyville! Life is now about Disney Princesses.

Booooorring.

by Anonymousreply 20December 27, 2021 9:26 PM

Is that an F2M on the left?

by Anonymousreply 21December 27, 2021 9:29 PM

Gay men claiming to have post-natal depression is embarrassing and absurd. There is a side of me where Republicans need to take care of business. Gay men are out of control. OUT OF CONTROL.

by Anonymousreply 22December 27, 2021 9:31 PM

I can understand why he didn’t have any friends when they moved to Australia. He sounds insufferable.

by Anonymousreply 23December 27, 2021 9:35 PM

[quote]It really makes me sick.

I’m getting there.

by Anonymousreply 24December 27, 2021 9:37 PM

r20 have you thought about what you said? you're entire purpose on earth is to have sex. that's it. no one else exists except for those that can please you sexually.

by Anonymousreply 25December 27, 2021 9:40 PM

Dad on the left does have an ftm look.

by Anonymousreply 26December 27, 2021 9:42 PM

"Okay, I'm confused. How does a gay man who uses a surrogate, end up with 'post natal depression'?"

R2, don't you know that now there is NOTHING women can do that men can't? And ten times better?

Democrats/liberals/progressives, here is your mantra until the midterms: "51%... 51%... 51%..." Learn it, know it, and start living it, or you're going to be in a world of hurt.

by Anonymousreply 27December 27, 2021 9:54 PM

It’s got to be the fugly one on the left. She just screams low self esteem and needing special attention.

by Anonymousreply 28December 27, 2021 9:58 PM

"Postnatal depression" did he carry the child to term and breast feed afterwards. If he did not do such things then he needs to snafu. What he experienced is normal depression that isn't postnatal.

by Anonymousreply 29December 27, 2021 10:04 PM

Trans convincing gay men, they too, are women.

by Anonymousreply 30December 27, 2021 10:05 PM

Post heteronormative depression is more like it.

by Anonymousreply 31December 27, 2021 10:05 PM

Chasten Buttigieg, you in danger girl!

by Anonymousreply 32December 27, 2021 10:11 PM

I read a comment once asking “why do gay men want to use the women’s restroom?”

I think they were posting from the future.

by Anonymousreply 33December 27, 2021 10:11 PM

Yes, the author is the guy on the left. His Fun Youtube video somehow backfired and depressed me.

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by Anonymousreply 34December 27, 2021 10:13 PM

For so many decades gay men have declared they are women. We didn’t shave our legs after we came out. Lesbians were not men.

All of that is changing.

by Anonymousreply 35December 27, 2021 10:17 PM

Oh, Christ, we not only have to read all his whinging about baby, but there's a podcast as well?

by Anonymousreply 36December 27, 2021 10:26 PM

I'm very curious to know WHO has a vested interest in this nonsense..

Is it the magazine? His doctor? Big Pharma?

I want to shake this asshole and shout, "YOU'RE NOT A WOMAN!!!!!"

by Anonymousreply 37December 27, 2021 10:36 PM

[quote] I thought the post natal depression thing was a hormonal issue?

Same here.

My understanding is that the post-natal depression is completely physical and hormonal.

Caused by female hormones being all out of whack, after giving birth.

Therefore, a man CANNOT EXPERIENCE THIS.

But of course, in this nutjob's delusional mind, he actually gave birth to the baby and now his "female" hormones are causing the condition.

I'm just.... blown away by how ridiculous people today have become.

by Anonymousreply 38December 27, 2021 10:38 PM

More like "Missing Extra Dick Syndrome".

by Anonymousreply 39December 27, 2021 10:45 PM

I had post-Nader depression..

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by Anonymousreply 40December 27, 2021 10:48 PM

R11 and R14: I love you

by Anonymousreply 41December 27, 2021 10:52 PM

I'm 42 and still feel that living a child-free life is the consolation prize for being gay in America. So many horrible things happened along the way, but overjoyed I don't have to be a parent and subject to a "whoopsie" moment.

by Anonymousreply 42December 27, 2021 10:52 PM

I fell like this article was written with the express intention to troll The Data Lounge.

by Anonymousreply 43December 27, 2021 10:53 PM

He should be slapped, viciously.

by Anonymousreply 44December 27, 2021 10:54 PM

If I were the boyfriend of the author of this article, I'd be completely embarrassed.

And then I'd dump his ass.

by Anonymousreply 45December 27, 2021 10:55 PM

[quote]I'm 42 and still feel that living a child-free life is the consolation prize for being gay in America.

Not a consolation prize — the grand prize.

by Anonymousreply 46December 27, 2021 11:05 PM

"How does a gay man who uses a surrogate, end up with "post natal depression?""

He doesn't, he's just another unhappy depressed married parent.

Post-natal depression is a very specific kind of depression caused by pregnancy-related hormonal shifts, which this man is not experiencing. Of course he's experiencing every other kind of unhappiness and disappointment that other parents go through, but it's not specifically a physical post-natal issue.

by Anonymousreply 47December 27, 2021 11:10 PM

Gay fathers probably have more frustration as new parents than mothers, because they are totally uneqiupped to care for an infant. And the only other person they have to rely on is another person unequipped to care for an infant. I've noticed males in general are less able to tolerate babies' fussiness.

by Anonymousreply 48December 27, 2021 11:12 PM

[quote]I've noticed males in general are less able to tolerate babies' fussiness.

Not proud of it, but to me a baby screaming doesn't engender the evolved response of "We must tend to it!" Rather it's "Stop that noise by any means necessary."

by Anonymousreply 49December 27, 2021 11:16 PM

Hopefully a nice nanny is around.

by Anonymousreply 50December 27, 2021 11:18 PM

I think you're wrong about men being "less equipped" to take care of infants, the world is not full of young women who've never had to tend younger siblings or earned cash by babysitting as teens. They aren't prepared for the 24/7 grinding drudgery of parenthood any more than gay men are.

by Anonymousreply 51December 27, 2021 11:20 PM

Man tries to steal valour and attention from a gravely-serious female biological issue by applying inept self-diagnosis in an insultingly vacuous way.

by Anonymousreply 52December 27, 2021 11:21 PM

He is unhappy and depressed which is hardly uncommon, however he’s an attention whore so he’s spinning it as post natal depression which is exclusive to women who have recently given birth.

by Anonymousreply 53December 27, 2021 11:26 PM

Children are best as nieces and nephews.

by Anonymousreply 54December 27, 2021 11:50 PM

Maybe he felt the disappointment and letdown that becoming a parent doesn’t entirely fill up your emptiness

by Anonymousreply 55December 27, 2021 11:51 PM

Wait till those two little darlings are snotty teenagers…

by Anonymousreply 56December 27, 2021 11:51 PM

Hello, friends, I’m your Vitamethamphetamine girl!

Are you tired, rundown, listless? Do you poop out at sex parties? Are you unpopular?

The answer to all your problems is in this little crystal, Vitamethamphetamine. Yes, with Vitamethamphetamine, you can slam your way to health. All you have to do is take a puff after every meal. It’s just like candy!

So, why don’t you join the thousands of happy, peppy gay parents, and get a great big bottle of Vitamethamphetamine tomorrow?

by Anonymousreply 57December 28, 2021 12:38 AM

Fuck surrogacy. Women aren't your fucking broodmares.

by Anonymousreply 58December 28, 2021 12:43 AM

I get those twinges about being a dad sometimes but I find a way to quench it by sucking cock.

by Anonymousreply 59December 28, 2021 12:54 AM

[quote]All anyone wanted to know was how the kids were. No one cared about me.

Aw, diddums.

by Anonymousreply 60December 28, 2021 1:21 AM

I agree r42 and r46.

To me one of the best parts of being gay was realizing I was never going to have to have kids. Now some gays are spending massive amounts of money to create kids for themselves, it's beyond me.

by Anonymousreply 61December 28, 2021 1:32 AM

[quote]How does a gay man who uses a surrogate, end up with "post natal depression?"

He doesn't. He obviously had depression but it wasn't post-natal depression, and I question whether he was diagnosed with that or not.

A woman who goes through post-natal depression doesn't just get the sads when "people only asked about the babies, not about me." She may have some physical problems along with the stress of life changing so rapidly, plus hormone fluctuations, which would manifest as "why doesn't anyone ask how I'm doing?" but a surrogate father wouldn't have any of that except the stress of a rapidly changing life. THAT is why it cannot be post-natal depression for the surrogate father.

by Anonymousreply 62December 28, 2021 1:37 AM

He’ll be fine once he loses the baby weight.

by Anonymousreply 63December 28, 2021 1:37 AM

[quote] I'm very curious to know WHO has a vested interest in this nonsense..

[quote]Is it the magazine?

Yeah, it's for the outrage clicks. Insider has been pretty bad about this for a while, they just never go viral because they're paywalled.

by Anonymousreply 64December 28, 2021 1:39 AM

Barefoot and surrogate - no wonder he's depressed.

by Anonymousreply 65December 28, 2021 1:40 AM

It’s tough tending to a baby while living with a tore up, slowly healing vagina. It is also hard to tend a baby while recovering from a C section.

Breast milk issues can be incredibly challenging and fraught. And physically uncomfortable.

All this and taking care of a creature that never sleeps more than 90 minutes a stretch, for months. I do feel for him, the poor guy.

by Anonymousreply 66December 28, 2021 1:42 AM

Zero to - infinity. Exhausting, attention seeking queen.

by Anonymousreply 67December 28, 2021 1:52 AM

He used to work as a social media manager for many years before moving to Australia.

This is just a piece of 'content' to get more followers and attention.

It's bullshit.

by Anonymousreply 68December 28, 2021 1:53 AM

Honey, just wait till you start feeling the pain from the fibroid tumors in your imaginary uterus

during your menstrual cycle

by Anonymousreply 69December 28, 2021 1:58 AM

I made the mistake of checking out his Twitter. He is beyond annoying.

by Anonymousreply 70December 28, 2021 2:24 AM

I read this as post naval and get very excited.

by Anonymousreply 71December 28, 2021 2:27 AM

Try getting some vaginal rejuvenation

that perks up a lot of the broads I knock up

by Anonymousreply 72December 28, 2021 2:34 AM

I would hope he would be embarrassed by making these grandiose statements, but I know he is not. Shameful.

by Anonymousreply 73December 28, 2021 2:58 AM

Just wait until she hits menopause and the kids tell her how they really feel about her

by Anonymousreply 74December 28, 2021 3:02 AM

He can keep the kids. I’m jealous his husband got a job transfer out of the United States and he got to go along. Even if it is only Australia he got a get out of jail free card from Crazyland.

by Anonymousreply 75December 28, 2021 3:20 AM

He makes me embarrassed to be a bottom

by Anonymousreply 76December 28, 2021 3:34 AM

Actually this is called "buyer's remorse."

by Anonymousreply 77December 28, 2021 3:36 AM

I was diagnosed with postnasal drip

by Anonymousreply 78December 28, 2021 3:38 AM

R75 Husband is an Aussie native. They met in NYC.

The wifebottom is shaping his entire identity about being a father.

For more secondhand embarrassment...he talks about being a trailblazer as gay parents, but then whines about the microaggressions of parenting being based around mothers and fathers. Deal with the forms that say mother, deal with the mommy groups that don't want you, deal with the whining kids.

How did this whiny bitch get a handsome daddy with an Australian accent???

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by Anonymousreply 79December 28, 2021 3:40 AM

This professional victim was calling suicide hotlines in his diapers.

by Anonymousreply 80December 28, 2021 3:40 AM

This man appears to be the male version of the bored mommies who can't believe how shit parenting a newborn is and are mourning their lost youth and selfishness, knowing it is gone forever. His article is uninteresting and he sounds like hard work.

But this weird af "any man experiencing an emotion we primarily associate with women is directly harming women" is some trollish, divisive bullshit and it's disappointing to see how many on this website seem to have fallen for it.

You'll note the Mayo Clinic directly states that:

[quote]Men can experience post-partum depression, too.

"Post-partum" just literally means post-birth. Any primary caregiver to a newly birthed child can experience post-partum depression. Most primary caregivers to newborn children are women, for reasons of biology, but not ALL of them are.

I am a woman and I have not ever, not for one second, felt like something was being "taken" from me by men like the one who wrote this article or even by trans women. I remain female regardless of how anyone chooses to feel or express themselves and this "oh, something precious is being STOLEN FROM THE BIO WOMENNNN!" is some barely-concealed misogynistic and gender essentialist bullshit that you can fuck right off with.

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by Anonymousreply 81December 28, 2021 3:47 AM

I figured out who he reminds me of: UberMommyFrau and Susan Sarandon's Daughter, Eva Amurri

(apologies to Eva, you may be insufferable, but you're much better looking).

[qute]My husband, Josh, has always placed my needs at the very top of his priority list. He’s fully and completely dedicated to this relationship. His attention to detail, his perceptiveness and his willingness to move mountains to ensure that I’m heard is what made me fall in love with him. I’d like to pretend that I’m an equally fabulous partner, but that would be a lie. I’m more of a children-first-everything-second-kind-of-person, which comes with a unique set of strengths and weaknesses. One of those weaknesses is my inability to prioritise me-time, which became abundantly clear when we went into the second Sydney lockdown. We were moving house and I was juggling a new-ish job working for myself, but I wanted to spend as much time with my children as I could.

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by Anonymousreply 82December 28, 2021 3:49 AM

Sorry, no refund.

I predict a divorce before kindergarten. The husband is a newscaster. Some twink intern will offer to work late and...

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by Anonymousreply 83December 28, 2021 4:00 AM

He's pathetic!

by Anonymousreply 84December 28, 2021 4:06 AM

[quote]Both my husband and I thought 'this isn't as fun as we thought it would be'.

We have two dumb daddies.

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by Anonymousreply 85December 28, 2021 4:10 AM

Which person is it? Is it the Steve Bannon baggage under the eyes may have found a place to score heroin guy or the big head one on the right?it's

by Anonymousreply 86December 28, 2021 4:13 AM

Well didn't Mayor Pete take maternity leave, when the twins fell out of Chasen's butt?

by Anonymousreply 87December 28, 2021 4:18 AM

It's "Bwomb", Chucklefuck @ R87.

by Anonymousreply 88December 28, 2021 4:21 AM

This person is just a gay Hilaria / Chrissy / Elizabeth Chambers. Exploiting their family life for attention.

by Anonymousreply 89December 28, 2021 4:21 AM

I'm not a parent, but I exist in the world with a functioning brain. If you don't know that parenting is a lot of work, you're a fucking idiot.

Observing other people's kids is exhausting enough.

by Anonymousreply 90December 28, 2021 5:01 AM

[Quote]Fuck surrogacy. Women aren't your fucking broodmares.

No, they're whores who will sell anything for a few bucks.

by Anonymousreply 91December 28, 2021 5:07 AM

[quote]I thought the post natal depression thing was a hormonal issue? But, I could see the overwhelming stress of infant care inducing depression.

Can men get the traditional, "post natal" depression that is caused by hormonal changes? Yes. A man's hormones can change shortly after a baby is born and even while their wives are pregnant but that's very rare. I happens in about 10% of men and it generally only with young, first time fathers around the age of 25 or younger. A man's hormones should eventually return to normal. Generally the testosterone level drops. Oxytocin level increases. It manifests as a man becoming more gentle and actually wanting to spend time with the kid. That absolutely does not happen to everyone but it's probably a biological, "must protect the child" thing.

Otherwise you're just depressed and that's the case for the majority of men experiencing it.

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by Anonymousreply 92December 28, 2021 5:20 AM

The wifey bottom guy is insufferable.

by Anonymousreply 93December 28, 2021 5:25 AM

He's a Post-Natal Drip.

by Anonymousreply 94December 28, 2021 5:34 AM

The husband must have the patience of a saint.

by Anonymousreply 95December 28, 2021 5:42 AM

I don't know r2, but I'm debating whether or not it's mildly insulting to new mothers who suffer from post-partum depression due to actual hormone changes that affect their brain chemistry after giving birth. Also, how long were those babies with the "mother" when they were newborn? Because that's actually pretty important. That's why you're not supposed to take puppies and kittens away from their mothers too early. Same with humans. It can cause development issues.

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by Anonymousreply 96December 28, 2021 5:47 AM

r69 As someone who literally has fibroids, I'm triggered. This shit ain't no joke. :-|

Anyway, maybe he should follow mikkomirage on IG. Her content is adorable and therapeutic for new, anxious, confused and sad mommies.

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by Anonymousreply 97December 28, 2021 5:56 AM

[quote] I was diagnosed with postnatal depression six months after the kids were born.

SHUT THE FUCK UP!

SIT YOUR ASS DOWN IN THAT CORNER AND DO NOT COME OUT EVER AGIAN.

by Anonymousreply 98December 28, 2021 5:59 AM

[quote] I've noticed males in general are less able to tolerate babies' fussiness.

Oh, is that why my dad left for that pack of cigarettes?

35 years ago?

by Anonymousreply 99December 28, 2021 6:12 AM

R81 I doubt women see a serious condition as something "precious", wanting to keep it all to themselves. It's more that narcissists are running rampant these days and no one is willing to set them straight. Doesn't matter if it technically could apply to anyone post birth of children -- we all know it is a common term applied to women going through physical stressors. It's as nutty as men claiming to understand having periods because they get bad gas from time to time. 😬.

It needed to be stopped years ago when this trend began, where (typically) men claimed to have the same physical issues as women, even though they lack the same parts. It's not possible and it's ignorant AF. It has nothing to do with sexism either -- I'd be just as grossed out by a woman claiming she has something men are known for. Bending technicalities to be "inclusive" is regressive. It takes away from that issue by downplaying it. Now narcissistic men will play this card and tell women they can suck it up, because after all, think of all the poor silent male suffering you selfish cunts! 🙄

by Anonymousreply 100December 28, 2021 6:22 AM

Using a surrogate to have twins which are then utilised as props to establish your own brand as an influencer, replete with narcissistic proclamations of self-diagnosed health conditions? I can’t imagine this will turn out well. I see warnings about wire hangers and demands for axes in those children’s future.

As somebody who often lies awake at night thinking about minor faux pas that I committed decades ago, I’m always amazed that people such as this guy can brazenly go through the world with such little self-awareness.

by Anonymousreply 101December 28, 2021 6:42 AM

tl;dr. I'm a woman, I gave birth. Yoir hormones are absolute haywire after giving birth and your system is flooded with oxytocin. I cried because the stars were so beautiful one night. Seeing suffering gives you physical pain. It feels like being four years old again where you don't have an adult's brain to defend yourself against an onslaugt of feelings. It's easy to imagine how you can slip into depression during this extremely vulnerable state. What he describes is not like this. It's depression. It can't be post-natal because he didn't give birth. Words mean something, and I'm done pretending they don't.

by Anonymousreply 102December 28, 2021 7:09 AM

TOO LONG DID NOT READ. And obviously TMGI. TOO MUCH GAY INFORMATION. Shat up!!!!

by Anonymousreply 103December 28, 2021 7:16 AM

Being a dad revealed his deep self-loathing as a gay person. His attempts at heteronormalcy revealed the shell underneath.

He claims he "lost his identity" when it's clear he never had one to lose. Jesus, I'm about twenty years older than this guy and never acted like I was a desperate 1950s gay. Get with the program, Mary!

by Anonymousreply 104December 28, 2021 7:16 AM

The guy with brown hair reminds me of that actor that plays that bitchy school girl with an Australian accent.

by Anonymousreply 105December 28, 2021 7:47 AM

[quote]I am a woman and I have not ever, not for one second, felt like something was being "taken" from me by men like the one who wrote this article or even by trans women

What would DL be without the couple of pickme female posters who ALWAYS rush over to help prop up narcissistic male assholes and misogyny in any given thread?

We get it. You're Not Like All The Other Girls. Jesus.

by Anonymousreply 106December 28, 2021 7:49 AM

R106 That poster's a troll, ignore it. It calls gay men fags when we disagree with it.

by Anonymousreply 107December 28, 2021 7:51 AM

I was also going to say something about the pick me marmosette upthread :)

by Anonymousreply 108December 28, 2021 7:51 AM

[quote] It’s tough tending to a baby while living with a tore up, slowly healing vagina. It is also hard to tend a baby while recovering from a C section.

[quote] Breast milk issues can be incredibly challenging and fraught. And physically uncomfortable.

Speak for yourself.

My MANGINA went right back into shape after I delivered the twins out of my poop chute.

And my ample breastesses held more than enough milk for both babies.

I told Pete that since he would be home for three months, I was ready and able to have sex again.

Oddly enough, he told me he got called back to work for some "emergency." Oh, pish posh. Those men. They're always so busy!

Oh, well. Back to my Women's Day magazine article!

by Anonymousreply 109December 28, 2021 8:11 AM

Diagnosis: silly, sassy sissy with shit for brains

by Anonymousreply 110December 28, 2021 8:48 AM

Oh Lord. I feel for the kids ending up with this fool as a father.

by Anonymousreply 111December 28, 2021 9:02 AM

He says his original plan growing up was to stay in the closet, marry a woman, and have 7 kids.

Honey, sweetie, any blind, deaf and dumb woman that would marry you shouldn't be left in charge of a houseplant, let alone children

by Anonymousreply 112December 28, 2021 1:43 PM

R106: "What would DL be without the couple of pickme female posters who ALWAYS rush over to help prop up narcissistic male assholes and misogyny in any given thread?"

If indeed that poster is female, which I rather doubt. It gives certain... people... a charge to pretend they are "reasonable, inclusive cis women". And frankly, they have to, because the number of women supporting this insanity is rapidly shrinking.

by Anonymousreply 113December 28, 2021 2:58 PM

He's a asshole. We shouldn't allow men to claim a condition because they had a bad day. Women ready struggle to be taken seriously and getting the appropriate treatment when this jack monkey uses it to gain likes and followers. He can go straight to hell.

by Anonymousreply 114December 28, 2021 4:42 PM

Texas take the wheel! Get the ball rolling.

by Anonymousreply 115December 28, 2021 5:06 PM

That queen must have a magic mussy to bag a man that hot . Hes just so damn gross looking ! I remember when I hit 30 or so I went on this baby kick .My husband of course thought I was a loon but humored me. For at least 2 years I researched and debated,but it finally passed. I thank god my husband didnt actually let me go thru with it. What the fuck was I thinking???

by Anonymousreply 116December 28, 2021 5:06 PM

A friend of mine and her husband had their first baby a year ago. She’s an adorable and mostly easy baby, per my friend, who is open with me about her struggle with the baby weight, nerve damage from labor, and the massive amount of effort, money and sacrifice that come with “an easy baby”.

They were planning to have #2 pretty quickly but now those plans are firmly on hold.

Anyone who thanks parenthood is going to be fun and happy times 24/7 shouldn’t be allowed to breed. At the very least, you should have to babysit for 2 weeks.

I’m a very happy uncle: we play, I spend money, I keep them alive when they’re with me for a few hours…end of list.

by Anonymousreply 117December 28, 2021 5:33 PM

I can’t imagine anything duller than a podcast about parenting by some homemaker bottom.

by Anonymousreply 118December 28, 2021 5:46 PM

R118 I know right?? I should start one.

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by Anonymousreply 119December 28, 2021 5:56 PM

The husband, a “both sides are bad” queen who was a regular on Joe Rogan.

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by Anonymousreply 120December 28, 2021 6:25 PM

I always get post-nasal depression after a cocaine binge!

by Anonymousreply 121December 28, 2021 6:41 PM

When Josh and Sean Szeps met they knew instantly they'd found "the one." How did they know? Because Josh insulted Sean.

The pair met in 2011 in a dive bar in New York, moved in together in 2012, were engaged by 2013 and married in 2014. While many gay couples feel that having a relationship and a family is difficult, for Sean and Josh they felt they were always in the right place at the right time. Gay marriage became legal in the US just as they were considering getting married, the price of IVF started to come down just as they were wondering whether they should start a family. And when they decided that surrogacy was the way they wanted to go, the approval process was fast.

In 2017 their twins, Stella and Cooper were born in America. The product of Josh's sperm and an egg donated by a female member of Sean's family.

They've now moved to Australia and are raising their twins here. They join Mia to share their story...

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by Anonymousreply 122December 28, 2021 6:46 PM

He... insulted him? And that brought them together? I need to know more.

by Anonymousreply 123December 28, 2021 7:41 PM

Next up in attention whoring posts for this queen:

First day of kindergarten blues. Menopause is killing me. Raising kids while coping with fibromyalgia. Homosexual empty nesters have it the worst!

by Anonymousreply 124December 28, 2021 8:49 PM

The Me Me Me man just couldn't have anything other than that duncey bloggy writing style, could he.

by Anonymousreply 125December 28, 2021 9:30 PM

That is just the wrong haircut for him.

by Anonymousreply 126December 28, 2021 9:34 PM

He looks like Harry Styles and Carroll Burnett had a child.

by Anonymousreply 127December 28, 2021 9:35 PM

I think what happened is he had a baby expecting it to cure all of his problems. And when the realization that it didn’t set in, he got depressed.

by Anonymousreply 128December 28, 2021 9:38 PM

R123 You just know the insult will be something similar to “You’re too good looking to be single and hanging around dive bars…”

by Anonymousreply 129December 28, 2021 9:46 PM

Those kids are ugly. I'd be depressed too.

by Anonymousreply 130December 28, 2021 9:47 PM

[quote] I think what happened is he had a baby expecting it to cure all of his problems. And when the realization that it didn’t set in, he got depressed.

Chasten, you in danger gurl!

by Anonymousreply 131December 28, 2021 10:14 PM

Postnasal depression?

How extreme.

by Anonymousreply 132December 28, 2021 10:28 PM

I swear, this twat must have a vagina.

He's just... yuck.

by Anonymousreply 133December 28, 2021 10:31 PM

[quote]Anyone who thanks parenthood is going to be fun and happy times 24/7 shouldn’t be allowed to breed. [bold]At the very least, you should have to babysit for 2 weeks.[/bold]

Or learn how to do it right from an experienced mother dog. At the very least. If you can't get 1 kid to mind you how the hell can you expect to handle 8?

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by Anonymousreply 134December 29, 2021 6:01 AM

You guys, my pussy hurts!

by Anonymousreply 135December 30, 2021 5:44 AM

But children are beautiful. The cousin of post partum sufferer, the one who donated eggs must be a lovely lady. They look like their mother is Nathalie Wood.

by Anonymousreply 136December 30, 2021 7:27 AM

Hopefully he won't diagnosed with Munchausen by proxy.

by Anonymousreply 137December 30, 2021 7:40 AM

[quote]I was diagnosed with postnasal drip

I was diagnosed with postnatal drip. Years later, it’s still dripping.

by Anonymousreply 138December 30, 2021 7:44 AM

This. BITCH!

by Anonymousreply 139December 30, 2021 8:35 AM

R5 Performative bullshit to feel like a trailblazer on the internet. Remember when you actually had to be a writer to write, and people looked forward to reading what interesting, writerly people wrote? God love the internet for ruining everything.

by Anonymousreply 140December 30, 2021 10:49 AM

Is she ok?

by Anonymousreply 141January 8, 2022 12:39 AM

Lol R135!

I wonder if his vagina is swollen from all that post natal depression?

by Anonymousreply 142January 8, 2022 12:44 AM

Get your eyes checked, R136. The kids look like Gollum.

by Anonymousreply 143January 8, 2022 12:45 AM

I learned in high school writing to avoid starting sentences with "I". This guy is a terrible writer, a narcissist, or both.

by Anonymousreply 144January 8, 2022 12:54 AM

R144 the first clue was "after the babies came, people always asked about THEM, not ME"

by Anonymousreply 145January 8, 2022 1:07 AM

A great example to use to reban gay marriage.

by Anonymousreply 146January 8, 2022 1:10 AM

I've never wanted children, so being gay is good for me.

I'd marry a guy if I loved one enough, though. I don't agree with this general idea of all gay men needing to reject things that straights have always done, such as marriage.

by Anonymousreply 147January 9, 2022 11:56 AM

Has the bottomfrau pulled a Diane Downs yet?

by Anonymousreply 148April 10, 2022 6:49 AM

How the fuck do these ugly guys bag these hotties?

by Anonymousreply 149April 10, 2022 7:42 AM

Hi r105!

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by Anonymousreply 150April 10, 2022 7:58 AM

R149 he's clearly a doormat. They have the top's name, live in the top's country, and the kids were made with the top's sperm.

by Anonymousreply 151April 10, 2022 8:04 AM

Mental health issues wrapped up in nice non-threatening terms.

by Anonymousreply 152April 10, 2022 8:34 AM

R150 omg .. Yuck

by Anonymousreply 153April 10, 2022 8:38 AM

Have the kids run away yet?

by Anonymousreply 154December 9, 2022 4:45 PM

This is as nonsensical as hysterical pregnancy. Some men really need a vicious slap sometimes.

by Anonymousreply 155December 9, 2022 4:47 PM

A man can not have postnatal depression. A tranny cannot have a period. Stop with this fkin bullshit. It will be the demise of western civilization.

by Anonymousreply 156December 9, 2022 4:54 PM

One could argue the demise already started and that's why this nonsense begins sprouting.

by Anonymousreply 157December 9, 2022 8:31 PM

When gays go 'frau'

by Anonymousreply 158December 9, 2022 8:34 PM

The one on the left looks ftm.

by Anonymousreply 159December 9, 2022 9:49 PM

The one on the right could do better.

by Anonymousreply 160December 9, 2022 9:50 PM

Have they divorced yet?

by Anonymousreply 161March 7, 2023 9:10 PM

He meant "postanal depression"

by Anonymousreply 162March 7, 2023 9:12 PM

[quote]He should have depression for exploiting an woman‘s body and taking away her baby.

You should expect to be able to take something after it's owner SELLS it to you.

by Anonymousreply 163March 7, 2023 9:13 PM

What’s wrong with simply being a bearded lady? I saw one back in the 90s. I thought it was cool. The 90s were simpler, better times.

by Anonymousreply 164March 7, 2023 9:13 PM

See, some people just shouldn’t be parents but they just can’t take the fucking hint.

by Anonymousreply 165March 7, 2023 9:14 PM

Oh thank god, she's written a book!

He really thinks he's a trailblazer. Hun, Dan Savage did it 20+ years ago when there were very few gay dads. Now, it's bordering on trendy.

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by Anonymousreply 166March 7, 2023 9:24 PM

Poor kid.

Having narcissists for parents is exhausting.

by Anonymousreply 167March 7, 2023 9:32 PM

Muriel is so vile for allowing such threads to grow this large.

by Anonymousreply 168March 7, 2023 9:41 PM

This is ridiculous. The kid didn't pop out of him. He did not undergo the chemical changes women do. Whatever his depression is, it's not postnatal depression.

by Anonymousreply 169March 7, 2023 9:49 PM

My issue with this story is that the whole point of being a parent, if you're going to do it right, is that yes that is your WHOLE identity now. If your career and your social life and your hobbies are still that meaningful to you, then don't adopt a child. You don't need to be having much of a life outside of your children, they're not pets.

by Anonymousreply 170March 7, 2023 10:06 PM

Oh, I think that Michael Jackson fella had postnasal depression, too!

by Anonymousreply 171March 7, 2023 10:09 PM

R134 I loved that! Proper discipline. Mum was having no nonsense from those naughty little pups.

by Anonymousreply 172March 7, 2023 10:11 PM

Speaking as a woman....please, just fucking stop, all of you men participating or enabling in this constant overstepping.

Come back when you've been oppressed for TWO THOUSAND YEARS as a sexual underclass for the crime of naturally having a different chromosome and internal reproductive organs.

Until we build hydroponic pods or robots to incubate more humans, females need immutable rights and boundaries and respect in place as the gestating class. That means our own terms and language, and our own health codex, among other things.

by Anonymousreply 173March 7, 2023 10:13 PM

[quote] ‘We went through surrogacy’

No, you didn’t ‘go through’ anything, you fucking creeps. The woman you hired and bought as a flesh incubator did.

by Anonymousreply 174March 8, 2023 2:25 PM

Josh Szeps used to be cuter. He used to be one of the hosts of HuffPost Live. Here he is with the insufferable Russell Brand.

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by Anonymousreply 175March 8, 2023 2:32 PM

[quote]Speaking as a woman....please, just fucking stop, all of you men participating or enabling in this constant overstepping...Come back when you've been oppressed for TWO THOUSAND YEARS as a sexual underclass for the crime of naturally having a different chromosome and internal reproductive organs...Until we build hydroponic pods or robots to incubate more humans, females need immutable rights and boundaries and respect in place as the gestating class. That means our own terms and language, and our own health codex, among other things.

LOL - and this person thinks it's chromosomes and internal reproductive organs that are the reason she's oppressed.

by Anonymousreply 176March 8, 2023 4:33 PM

I missed the part where she was held down and forced, R174. You know, since a woman’s domain apparently doesn’t extend to making decisions for herself, including ones you wouldn’t make for yourself. That sounds like empowerment- you can’t do it because I said you can’t.

by Anonymousreply 177March 8, 2023 9:03 PM

R177 some women are also 'free' to become sex workers or cult members or wives of abusive husbands, and sadly do so--does that make it a good idea, or a feministic move, or a libertarian own?

by Anonymousreply 178March 8, 2023 9:51 PM

R178 - so do men become sex workers or cult members. Or husbands or spouses of abusive partners. No, it doesn’t make it right, especially if choices are limited. But some people do choose those things, so by whose values are we measuring their decisions? Do you think outlawing sex work is the answer? So why don’t you just fucking think about it deeply, but for maybe more than a second.

by Anonymousreply 179March 8, 2023 10:04 PM

It's only a matter of time before loons like the ones in the OP article are taking up hospital beds with "ovarian cancer" or "endometriosis" or "uterine fibroids." And getting "stunning and braves" from the media and "allies."

by Anonymousreply 180March 8, 2023 10:18 PM

Ok R176, why are women oppressed, then? Why have they been treated and viewed as chattel, historically? Why is it only in recent centuries that Western women could vote and keep their names and hold personal bank accounts and attend higher education, and why are there many Eastern women who are still banned from that? Tell us and enlighten our silly women brains, oh wise Bepenised one.

[quote] Do you think outlawing sex work is the answer?

R179 obviously not, that just drives it further underground and makes women/minor workers (and sure, fine, some men) more deprived and unsafe. I think it needs regulating and taxing and bringing into administration, so we can see where people and money are moving inside the business and thereby crack down more on felonies. I also believe audiovisual p0rn needs to be behind strict paywalls that require ID and credit card details to access. See? Inferior female brains can have good ideas sometimes too...

Also, I'm sorry to break it to you, but in terms of percentage surrogacy is largely an issue of human traff!ck!ng that involves straight people and rich people--so, not everything is actually about you and your fee-fees being hurt. Actual real-life human bodies are being exploited daily, and all you're interested in is being a Randian keyboard warrior. It's so fucking weird and creepy and sad.

Just fucking adopt a kid or get a dog, accept you don't have a right to rent wombs that you don't possess and that you don't have to bleed and live in pain for years to keep.

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by Anonymousreply 181March 8, 2023 10:21 PM

R181, and all you’re interested in being is anti-male. You’ve completely shown your hand. So yeah, men oppressive and bad, women oppressed and good, is that about it? However, you neglect that your militant view doesn’t align with “my body, my choice” and women who, for example, may willingly want to have babies for gay men. Because those women do exist. I’m not really sure what point you’re trying to make, but it’s coming across as angry man-hating lesbian. Just because it’s your view doesn’t mean you can impose it on all women. Because that sounds kind of fascist.

by Anonymousreply 182March 8, 2023 11:16 PM

R182 no, men are not individually all bad. The societal structure they built for their own purposes is. There can be decent forward-thinking men inside that structure, as well as cruel amoral regressive women. But women didn't create that all-encompassing capitalist trap for us all, because we never had that power. What is hard to get about that?

by Anonymousreply 183March 8, 2023 11:19 PM

R7- stop dictating what women can n can't do with their bodies

by Anonymousreply 184March 8, 2023 11:31 PM

I don’t disagree with that at all, R183. Serious question, then, if surrogacy was outlawed completely, what would that change? And I say this saying that “surrogacy” in many places is actually illegal. But what does outlawing it in NA do for, say, women in India who are trapped in capitalist surrogacy? Which, for the record, I’m not supporting. But arguably, isn’t outlawing surrogacy - and setting aside what goes on in countries such as India - just another form of trying to regulate women’s bodies?

by Anonymousreply 185March 8, 2023 11:41 PM

R185 fair point, it would leave poverty-stricken women in developing countries in a bind. We have no right to take that option away.

Note also that I at no point called for surrogacy to be outlawed. I just expressed a valid disgust with affluent straight people and gay men who are ok with availing themselves of it. People will do what they want when there's money to be made, regardless of my personal ethics or yours.

These are hypotheticals we're discussing. I just wish it would either be collectively regulated, or that individuals would actually exercise moral integrity and autonomy to think twice, but that's my ideal world and you clearly prefer more of a crapsack one that perpetuates the status quo, because you're morbid or get off on it or something fucked-up like that.

But I'm the 'man hating' dyke who needs to shut up and go away and stop daring to talk about womens' bodies (even though I actually inhabit one, unlike most of the posters here). I get it, I see the agenda.

by Anonymousreply 186March 8, 2023 11:49 PM

I used to listen to Josh's podcast about seven years ago before he moved back to Australia. He's a good interviewer. When he left the states, he pretty much fell out of the podcast landscape and focused more on Aussie stories, and I completely forgot about him.

It's too bad his huzband is having depression. I bet they're not fucking any longer, like so many new parents.

by Anonymousreply 187March 8, 2023 11:55 PM

Sorry, 186. I do apologize. I see you’re passionate and I can appreciate that. I shouldn’t have made assumptions and stooped to what I said and so really do apologize. And I don’t really have beliefs that are different than yours. I simply see the issue as another one of regulating women’s bodies instead of letting women have free will. Do I think gay men or straight couples should avail themselves because it exists? It might surprise you to know that I don’t agree with the sense of entitlement - no one is entitled to have a child. I just don’t think anyone should tell women they *can’t* do it.

by Anonymousreply 188March 9, 2023 12:04 AM

It sounds more like Buyer’s Remorse.

by Anonymousreply 189March 9, 2023 12:19 AM

I fell in love with a Brit once in my 20s, and we moved to England together for a time. I had always loved visiting London, and was a huge fan of British arts and culture my whole like. But visiting a country as a tourist and moving/assimilating into that country's culture, are two totally different things. I became very homesick and depressed during my year in England. Like this whinger I too felt like i'd lost myself. No longer had a job or friends or family and my boyfriend ended up being rather an unempathetic negligent dole boy. I ran back home after a year a whole lot wiser about what it really means to move to another continent and what it requires to live a fulfilling life. It's a wonderful adventure but if you don't have clarity about the cultural differences, or have a plan and vision for what steps you are going to need to take to create a happy life for yourself, from SCRATCH, it can be very lonely and discombobulating.

Point is, you cannot get postpartum depression a full SIX months after your children arrive on the scene, but you CAN get terribly, awfully homesick if you move to a new culture, halfway around the world from all friends and family. Compound that with the fact that your partner may be returning to a life full of old friends, extended family, a new job, etc, and it's going to make you feel like the odd man out. It takes courage and patience to get through the initial year or so. You are entering stage left as an anonymous nobody, with no pals, no sense of familiarity, no job, no family. And then add being stuck home all day caring for twin infants while your hot daddy gets to leave every day and have a career, and god, it does sound like a crap situation.

by Anonymousreply 190March 9, 2023 12:19 AM

I guess all the bills would make anyone depressed.

by Anonymousreply 191March 9, 2023 12:28 AM

My mother had post-natal depression, partly because she felt ill from giving birth for several months. This guy did not have post-natal depression. He didn't have a kid.

by Anonymousreply 192March 9, 2023 12:33 AM

[bold]postnatal[/bold]

post·na·tal

[pōstˈnādl]

ADJECTIVE

of, relating to, characteristic of, or denoting [bold]the period after childbirth[/bold]

Did this man recently give birth? Was he recently given birth to?

No?

Then he doesn't have postnatal anything. He's a self-pitying, navel-gazing narcissist.

Christ, I pity their kids.

by Anonymousreply 193March 9, 2023 12:34 AM

I’ve just passed on the blessed gift of life! Now, let me slit my wrists.

by Anonymousreply 194March 9, 2023 12:38 AM

Are these children twins? Having to deal with two kids all at once must be taxing.

by Anonymousreply 195March 9, 2023 12:39 AM

Sweet Mother of Beulah.

by Anonymousreply 196March 9, 2023 12:40 AM

Next week: How my gay abortion led to a life of regret and misgivings.

by Anonymousreply 197March 9, 2023 12:45 AM

Did he get premenstrual syndrome before the eggs were harvested?

by Anonymousreply 198March 9, 2023 12:47 AM

Man does something women have been doing since dawn of time (giving up portions of their life and selfhood to focus on raising children).

Man gets the vapors and swoons on the fainting couch, his delicate constitution unable to bear the simply dreadful burden.

Meanwhile, billions of women worldwide carry on doing it without fanfare, writeups, or tickertape parades.

by Anonymousreply 199March 9, 2023 12:53 AM

Is his partner no longer interested in his stretched-out birth canal? Could that be at the root of the depression?

by Anonymousreply 200March 9, 2023 1:00 AM

------

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by Anonymousreply 201March 9, 2023 1:13 AM

Have never forgotten a woman telling me that it looked like a catcher's mitt full of lasagna down there after giving birth.

It's something I don't think men can even mentally conceive of, the way one's body is completely drained and rearranged to give birth. You're not the same person afterward, physically or mentally or emotionally.

by Anonymousreply 202March 9, 2023 1:16 AM

Couples who refer to themselves as ‘we’—gay or straight—are the worst. Hard pass.

by Anonymousreply 203March 9, 2023 11:55 AM

It's giving Channel 4

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by Anonymousreply 204March 10, 2023 1:45 AM

Flamers

by Anonymousreply 205March 10, 2023 2:42 AM

It looks like they ate their feelings.

by Anonymousreply 206March 10, 2023 4:27 AM

Maybe he’s a woman. You don’t know how he classifies himself.

by Anonymousreply 207March 10, 2023 4:35 AM

I still can't find one good, noble, reason to create a baby on purpose. Usually, whenever you ask people who go through all of the fertility treatments, surrogacies, inseminations, etc. to have children, the reasons for doing so are entirely self-serving.

So, on one hand, you have straights racking up unplanned pregnancies left and right because that's just the natural outcome of "hetero relations" and "just going with it" by having the kid(s).

And on the other hand, you have straights with fertility issues and gays actually making the conscious decision to go through all of the changes to create more humans.

Neither of the above scenarios are good reasons to have kids, to me. Not "Well, we were banging raw and then nature took its course, now I'm exhausted, broke, and regretful." And not, "We just wanted something to love and a puppy wouldn't boost our egos enough."

I seriously can think of no good reasons to have babies. When I hear of surrogacy and IVF stories, I just think "selfish people."

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by Anonymousreply 208March 10, 2023 7:19 AM

Weird. Josh was such a trooper during lamaze class!

by Anonymousreply 209March 10, 2023 7:23 AM

This person just has an Adjustment Disorder.

by Anonymousreply 210March 10, 2023 7:41 AM

A great deal of our lives is about seeking out human connection. I am sorry your parents didn’t love you, OP, but many people do love their children and families, and enjoy the human connections they have with them.

by Anonymousreply 211March 10, 2023 7:52 AM

ChatGPT thinks it’s legit. Which proves ChatGPT just repeats woke talking points.

While postpartum depression is often associated with mothers who have given birth, it is important to recognize that fathers or male partners can also experience depression after the arrival of a new child. This type of depression is known as postnatal depression (PND) or paternal postpartum depression (PPPD).

Men who have had a child through surrogacy may experience PND just like any other father, even if they did not physically give birth to the child. The experience of becoming a parent through surrogacy can be emotionally complex and may involve a range of emotions, including excitement, joy, anxiety, and stress. Factors such as adjusting to new roles and responsibilities, changes in lifestyle and routine, and sleep deprivation can all contribute to PND.

It is essential to recognize the signs and symptoms of PND in men, which may include feelings of sadness, irritability, fatigue, anxiety, loss of interest in activities, and changes in appetite or sleep patterns. Men who experience these symptoms should seek support from a mental health professional or healthcare provider, who can provide appropriate treatment and support.

by Anonymousreply 212March 10, 2023 9:24 AM

Attention Whore Syndrome. Sometimes called the Chasten Flu.

by Anonymousreply 213March 10, 2023 9:25 AM

R90- As hard as you think being a parent is going to be you only wish it were that easy once you are a parent.

by Anonymousreply 214March 10, 2023 10:45 AM

R214 Hilary Duff gurl is that you?

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by Anonymousreply 215March 10, 2023 8:39 PM

What’s the going rate for surrogates these days? White physically-healthy late 20s-early 30s ones?

by Anonymousreply 216March 11, 2023 11:24 AM

[quote] Couples who refer to themselves as ‘we’—gay or straight—are the worst.

How should a couple refer to themselves? Do you mean they should always say "John and I" or whatever?

by Anonymousreply 217March 11, 2023 4:49 PM
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