My caroling experience

Get naked next time.

When did the police car pull up, OP?

0/10

It would be weird to be visited by a single, lone caroler. Next time, go with a group.

I'd piss on your shoes, but you'd probably like that.

Sounds like it went as well as your Trick or Treating experience.

Contact a church group that goes caroling. Alone? No.

What r4 said. "Caroling" implied a group of traveling singers, not some loner weirdo standing out in the snow warbling away. I'm sure you meant well though, OP.

I was just trying to spread some holiday cheer in my neighborhood.

I can't stop laughing at this post.....so op at least you have this?

[quote]I stood outside my neighbor’s front door while singing “The Holly and the Ivory”. I saw he and his wife peer at me through their blinds but they didn’t come to the door

Who can blame them? I wouldn’t come to the door for someone who sang a song about elephant poaching either.

I'm going to try this tonight. I can already tell you who will turn out the lights and who will come out laughing and telling me I'm nuts.

I have this kind of urgent need to do nice stuff all of a sudden. I paid for the 3 cars immediately behind me in line at Starbucks today. Merry Christmas 🎁

some loner weirdo standing out in the snow warbling away

That hurts my feelings. 😢

One criticism. You NEED a keytar, pronto! This being said, solo-caroling is kind of bad ass. Takes guts. As my friend Tractor would say, “good work, men.”

If you really want to make an impression on your neighbors, next time bring an auto tune microphone with you.

OP, the correct response from you would be been to knock on their doors and yell, “I know you’re in there!” and threaten to keep singing until they acknowledged you.

You know you can heat up your own cider and make Christmas cookies yourself. No need to torment others.

I heard the Roches carolling (sic) around Washington Square once. Wonderful.

Next time, convey your feelings through the art of modern dance.

And take bail.

Post a "Lone Caroler" video on TikTok and you'll become more popular on a global scale.

It's a sad, solo Christmas Charlie Brown.

There’s A Restraining Order, Charlie Brown.

now, that's a good idea for a skit/show.

The “Holly and the Ivory?” Perhaps they support anti elephant poaching in Africa and were offended by you pushing a substance that is illegal to import? As for “Oh, Holy Night,” why not try something more upbeat like “Bring a Torch Jeanette Isabella,” she was probably put off when you acted out the “fall on your knees” part and had to call 911 for assistance getting up. No one wants to see that on their front lawn.

I thought he was referencing Lennox's skin color.

If you keep this up, you may need bail money OP. I’ll start a GoFundMe.

I’ve always found caroling works best as a means to lure your husband out from a collapsed construction site.

You forgot to put your pants on again, didn’t you OP?

OP, are you the person who posted about bringing neighbors cookies and they hissed at you?

This thread has made me cackle hard. Thanks, boys!

A lone caroler is creepy, unless you are already the beloved neighborhood eccentric.

If it happens again ask yourself, what would Jussie do?

I’ve never seen Love, Actually, it sounds atrocious, just this scene and it creeps me the fuck out. I think this turned a lot of people off, especially since with him you keep waiting for the zombies to show up and him fight them off. Love, Actually ruined caroling.

If R34 doesn’t do the trick, try this.

Love Actually is a stinkfest of the highest order.

[quote] I saw he and his wife peer at me through their blinds

Remove the wife from the sentence. Does that sound correct?

“The Holly and the Ivory” is a very difficult song to sing.

Lá Sènatrice would stand outside Judge Kavanaughty's door and sing "I Saw Mama Kissing Santa Claus". The wife would call Lá Senatrice's limo service to come haul the drunk lady away.

[quote] “The Holly and the Ivory” is a very difficult song to sing.

It is indeed. The Glee Club at my Ivory League college had so much trouble with the lyrics.

Small Midwestern town? You should have shown up at my door! I would have greeted you with my best Christmas Caftan. Some Wasail and Hole.

Next time, bring a prop

If OP was black, she'd be shot dead the second she set foot on private property.

Stay away from homes with Let’s Go Brandon signs in the window.

Did you forget to bring the wassail? That is probably why then, OP.

If Rhyheim Shabazz stood outside my house alone, and sang God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen, I'd invite him in.

Did you show jigglin thigh? Pig leg stuffed in a black heeled boot? Big sloppy yellowish bush?

I hope it was 0° and you peed their door shut.

OP, you had me at Ivory.

It's hard to find something that's really gay for a gay message board, but wooow. Caroling is up there.

So you went dressed as Carol. Carol Brady or Carol Ann?

Lesbian Carol.

[quote]She almost immediately turned her lights off. Once again, I was ignored.

Were you wearing one of these?

[quote] I heard the Roches carolling (sic) around Washington Square once.

So jealous of this!

I'm chalking it all up to 2021. Trying not to ebb my joy for Christmas Day.

R25 You beat me to it. This quintessentially English carol . . . Oh my sides!

Caroling is a group activity, when one person does it alone they just seem like some type of nut case.

What wouldn't I give to see videos of OP caroling and getting old shoes thrown at him 🤣🏃😇👀🙉🐈🌙🌟🍅⛸️🎶 Surely he must have been captured on his neighbor's security cameras 📷?

You should have tried “Ebony and Ivy”, OP.

People really like that one.

Answering the door to carolers can be so awkward. You're standing in the doorway with a frozen smile while thinking all the time "when will this end? please go away people".

I’m baking for the hood

Try doing it at a street corner, Op. You might even get some tips!

Which American Idol loser are you?

And you looked so adorable, too, OP.

OP, find this lady and ask her to go caroling with you.

Fuck you, OP!

A grand merry holiday for OP.

I have a novel idea…. There is this guy who is a lot younger than me (I could be his dad) who I just found out where he lives. I’ve had my eye on him all year. Maybe I’ll crash-carol his home tonight? It certainly will be an ice breaker. If I’m lucky he’ll invite me in for hot cocoa. I will sing something beautiful for him. If I go through with it I’ll report back. Merry Christmas 🎄

[quote]… off of my psych meds.

That pretty much says it all.

OP do you doing well? Do have a good voice and sing in tune? I can understand your neighbors' reactions if you brayed the carols like the donkey Mary! rode on.

OP, imma let you get back to your caroling, but how did Love Actually become some kind of feel good Christmas classic? It is terrible and the relationships in it are largely terrible.

[quote]I saw he and his wife peer at me through their blinds

[quote]Remove the wife from the sentence. Does that sound correct?

I don’t know, let me try:

“I saw he and his peer at me through their blinds”

Wow, you’re right. That does NOT sound correct.

I was treated the same way when I drove through the neighborhood saying "Hey good looking, I'll be back to pick you up later" through my Ronco microphone!

I’m going to Garrett’s house tonight to serenade (carol) him. Wish me luck!

OP, how obese are you? Just trying to improve the imagery in my head. ....

Caroling Uncle is our new Bill Taylor!

If there's anything the neighbors want to open their door to during a pandemic, it's a man with his mouth wide open spraying germs over a wide radius.

I'm sure the older woman who lives alone just loves it when strange men show up on her doorstep at night expecting a warm welcome!

The OP and his Christmas tree...

You should have sang "Here We Come A-wassailing" instead.

Good luck, OP at r74! Here's Blair Warner to inspire you:

So last night this fat drunk fruit terrorized my neighborhood singing Christmas Carols top note.

When I was in 6th grade, our music teacher and her husband took our music class caroling. When we would sing "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer", a couple of male students thought it would be funny to say "Like Hitler" after the "You'll go down in history" part at the end. After about doing this at 5 houses or so, her husband finally told them to stop.

romance is really something. i think garrett got my anonymous valentine by mail yesterday. hope he lets me in.

Is that you OP? We missed you! Who's Garrett?

I’m so tired of my neighbors. They’re all lifeless bitches. No fun at all.

Are you hot?

Oh yeah

This is a great thread! Thanks for the laughs. Can't wait to hear how about this year's caroling adventure.

Long ago, there were two sisters, Carol and Bernice, who wanted to do something kind for their neighbors during the holidays. They came up with a novel idea to go from house to house singing uplifting, seasonal songs to surprise people and get them in the holiday spirit.

Unfortunately, on the day of their planned event, Bernice caught a bad cold and cough and was unable to participate. Undaunted, her sister Carol decided to go out and sing anyway, and the sisters’ plan turned out to be a huge success!

Which is why, to this day, we all go out Caroling and not Bernicing!

I am considering doing this again very soon. I want to see if I get a better responses out of people by trying different houses in my hood. I will not go to the cunt’s house this year.

I want to sing “Little Drummer Boy”

You seem to mean well but if you did this outside my house I would assume you were a threat.

A threat to your taste level r91

OP Did you present hole and sing O Holey Night ? Take a video and post here!

I sang "O Holy Night" in front of cunt's house and all she did was turn off her fucking house lights almost immediately after I began to sing.

We need a little Xmas

Thanks for bumping this. The premise is so funny imagining one queen standing outside someone's house at night singing Christmas songs with no music just hoping someone will open the front door smiling and say, "Thank you for spreading holiday cheer. You have such a nice voice, did you sing in high school choir. By the way, we're Jewish."

You're a general pariah in that neighborhood now that Joel's moved out, OP.

The neighborhood thinks I’m trashy and no good.

Try something from Annie Lennox's Christmas album.

Hell r99 that would piss anybody off!

I’m listening to throbbing gristle

Ding dong ding dong!

Ding dong ding dong Xmas bells are ringing!

OP: I love your kind spirit . You are loved by me and many. Forget these naysayers

Thank you OP, this thread is a real Yuletide treat, it’s made me laugh out loud.

We had some carolers on my street here in London a few years ago, at dusk, just before I closed the blinds. I was sitting in an armchair near the front window, swirling a gin and tonic. They could clearly see me so they stopped and started wailing outside my house. I didn't know what to do - did they want me to come to the front door and give them something? I just froze and pretended they weren't there. Eventually they moved on.

R106

You sir, are an asshole.

Well, OP, ivory has been banned.

Did you survive until xmas?

Go with a church group or find neighbors that go caroling. Going alone will have negative reactions.

Maybe you should wash with some Ivory nest time.

The holly and the ivory, really, OP?

R90 if you choose that song swap the “me and my drum” lyrics with “me and my bum”. I always do it when I’m alone and that song plays on the radio; I’m anxious to hear how it’s received publicly.

Do you have a good voice OP? Sing in key? That would make all the difference.

Put on a candy cane tutu, a bra of holly and bells, and a Santa’s elf hat; then head to your neighbors and sing:

OP is busy building a snowman on the neighbors' lawn for their kids to enjoy. He's not sure where to put the carrot.

I love the spirit of this and the sentiment also. Very old school. I get it.

But it's always important to only go where you're invited.

I had a neighbor try to organize outdoor caroling with their kids during a year when emotionally, I just needed to avoid Xmas altogether. It was too painful. So I politely declined, and then stayed inside on the day of and hid from them...but there they were, singing.

It really irritated me because you can sing carols inside your house. You don't have to impose that on others. It's confrontational.

A better gesture would be to shovel people's driveways if you are in a place where it snows. They'll be stunned you took the time, you can feel good about helping, and there's no expectations or imposition.

Carolers traditionally sing "now bring us some figgy pudding/we won't go until we get some!" so yeah, there is an expectation of having to compensate them for singing on your doorstep in the cold. People hate that. They might also think you're collecting for a charity.

But hey....you tried.

says:

[quote] You don't have to impose that on others. It's confrontational.

but only read/hear:

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. I have ptsd! Where was the trigger warning!

R118 Assuming your post wasn't an attempt as humor...People go caroling to celebrate the holiday. They do it because they enjoy it. They don't want to shovel your fucking driveway.

*attempt at

Where I live, characterizations of surrounding neighborhoods vary extensively. I never see caroling. Some neighborhoods, particularly at night, are too dangerous to be caroling or being unexpected otherwise, even for a group. Robbery, stabbings, and shootings, are way to frequent.

Where caroling may be most appreciated are nursing homes and other types of assisted living facilities whereby visiting is pre-arranged,

Now, OP - were you wearing your Cha Cha heels? Because they would have opened their doors if you had been...

My neighbors comprise of bitches and weirdasses I guess I’m included.

How boring.

They probably thought you were looking for donations. Caroling alone really is creepy.

Next time, ring their bell and present them with a book.

Did you offer them a rotisserie chicken?

r34 Andrew looks fucking gorgeous, as usual, I would have dropped to my knees if this happened in real life.

Are you colored? The elderly may me hesitant to open their door?

Marty that crazy neighbor guy in standing in our front yard singing.

Turn off the lights Betty he is probably drunk again.

EST bells, EST bells

It’s Christmas time, on DL