You can’t beat a gaslighter

Yeah there's no way they'll admit the truth.

You can become more sociopathic than them, start spreading rumors about them. They’ll call you crazy regardless.

Very, very true, R2.

The word "gaslighting" is way overused.

Start a vicious rumor that they’re sexually involved with one of their parents.

I was blindsided and gaslighted a couple of months ago. Quite without warning. Things have been on pause whilst I process the shock. I have, in the frozen meantime, closed the door on four friends to whom I've overcontributed for years. It's been a lovely Fall.

If this had happened to me when I was younger I'd exhume Yukio Mishima, command him to be my second, and snuff it on a Japanese hillside.

You can’t beat a gaslighting manager at work either. The only option is finding another job.

Do you know what a gaslighter is, OP, or are you thinking of the latest person who ghosted you?

? ^.

Oh, look, OP learned a new word and uses it continuously.

There has to be a way to get these people. There is always a way. I’m open to ideas. Gaslighting is aparticularly cruel thing to do. And is sadly in fashion.

You can’t overuse this word. Because it is now so common. Even “small” examples like a coworker saying “huh, I don’t remember that” when being called out when you know they do. It’s so unethical. Nobody wants to take responsibility for their crap. They would rather ghost you than confront their own flaws.

Always get receipts. Especially if you work for a soulless corporation. Don’t let them use your decency as a weapon against you.

[quote]There has to be a way to get these people. There is always a way. I’m open to ideas. Gaslighting is aparticularly cruel thing to do. And is sadly in fashion.

You can’t. They deny, they twist, they say you’re the problem.

r11 people have ALWAYS been shitty and self-absorbed.

There is no evidence that "gaslighting" is "on the rise." It's just become en vogue to label shitty behavior "gaslighting," much in the same way it's en vogue to label assholes "narcissists."

DLers will never get over their preoccupation with cluster Bs.

If the term gaslighting irritates you, try something like "stop pissing on my leg and telling me it's raining" or "That's right, just stick with your lie."

Tracy Turnblad is adopted.

It's very difficult to walk away

^ when you still feel for them, and they behave as if nothing happened, and refuse to discuss it, you keep going back for closure, but it never materialises

It is hard to walk away from mental abusers.

R7 no joke.

My bad old boss used to call me a thief, as well as hysterical, stupid, and incompetent. Broken up with backhanded-apologetic jags of crocodile tears. It turned out she was the one stealing from me—these people always accuse you of what *they’re* doing, so pay attention to what they say (and never believe it).

So relieved to be shot of the decaying Skeksis, though I wish her light and love and hope she finds a way through her trying times (without my involvement).

False.

You CAN and SHOULD LOCK THEM UP.

Yes, you can, OP.

With a club.

Oh great another term that’s ruining the English language 🙄

I associate "gaslighting" with a long-term, calculated attempt to undermine another person psychologically to make them easier to control/manipulate. Usually, this only happens in abusive relationships, because I think it comes in tandem with other behaviors, such as cutting someone off from other sources of support so that the abuser/gaslighter becomes the victim's whole world. To effectively gaslight a person, you have to enjoy some level of emotional intimacy with them.

I once worked with a woman in an abusive marriage. She also had a diagnosed mental illness. She occasionally confided in me, and apparently, for years, her husband had told her something was terribly wrong with her, but that no one in her life was willing to tell her exactly what it was. She was tormented by that.

I assume he played lots of similar games to mess with her, because she was always a wreck.

To me, that's gaslighting.

I've been cheated on and lied to. But I knew full well I was being lied to, and I wouldn't classify that as "gaslighting" (in my case). Gaslighting is more sinister than simply lying to and manipulating someone.

Ingrid Bergman is to blame.

[R7], my visual when I read your post is me being a member of a gospel choir with those flowing robes, my arms above my head, preaching the WORD! Your post opened a chink in the wall that took me three years to construct so I wouldn't be haunted by the job I walked out of nearly ten years ago. Just that chink... and I am TESTIFYING!

I tremble for the public of Ontario

[quote] a gaslighter

[quote]They would rather ghost you than confront their own flaws.

[quote]Always get receipts.

Is there some sort of requirement that you have to use stupid overused contemporary slang terms to post on this thread?

Canada or California, [R27]?