Jack Grealish, parte the Seventhe: prodigal at the Park ⚽️

Aston Villa Football Club released a very sweet and polite statement welcoming Jack back for tonight...which predictably has divided the fanbase into those who think that was a classy move, and those who think it’s a show of weakness and servility.

It’s all just chat and fuss—Jack still has a niggling injury and clearly doesn’t want to play, so he’ll probably sit this game out, anyway. Maybe he’ll pass 90 minutes on the sidelines having a cheeky sexting sesh, with his Liverpool FC boyfriend Hendo, or with some model girl off Insta (who isn’t his actual fiancée, a model girl off Insta).

He only came on for the last five minutes and extra time! Baldiola probably wanted to keep him back all game as a looming uncertain threat, then shove him on at the 11th Hour just to test his loyalty.

But regardless of Jack’s inefficacy and the brevity of his appearance, the boos and hisses lobbed down at him from the home stands were resounding. ‘Villa ‘Til I Die’ from every corner, each time he came near the ball. He tried to play it off at the whistle making a cute little round of pitch to applaud everyone, but that had to have rattled him. This was the crowd that backed him and uplifted him and championed him for some eighteen years as a player and several years as a senior pro—now they don’t want any of him.

btw even though her highlights do not work Jack’s gf Sasha is still a 9 and as a lesbian I’d do a lot of degrading stuff to get with a girl that hot

so if i can’t shag her then i hope she cheats on Jack with another hot girl WAG friend on hers and they spend all his money together behind his back

poor tired sad bored Jack forced by Pep’s team to sit down and analyse his own performance post-match with a report

when actually he just wants to go straight to a hotel for a comforting cuddle and a reassuring deep dicking from his lover Jordan

[quote] This was the crowd that backed him and uplifted him and championed him for some eighteen years as a player and several years as a senior pro—now they don’t want any of him.

Yes, because he ditched his boyhood club just to impress the chinless waistcoated twat.

R5 ah, so you’re a Villan? How did you take the match last night (if you watched it)? I’m curious to hear the views of longtime fans.

It was a very nervy and scrappy clash, imo, and I’m not a fan of either side saying that (West Brom & LFC, for me). Captain Mings looked agitated, Gerrard seemed anxious (he was biting his nails to the quick on the sidelines), and there was a lot of going to the ground with injuries from both teams.

Still, I felt that Villa did well to keep possession, hold City back, and even nick a goal. Pep’s side play boring sniper-style football, but they are difficult to keep away from the net once they find their rhythm, so for a disorganised and frankly still-burgeoning Villa side under new management to accomplish that is big.

I didn’t watch it because I’m in the US and I think it was on Amazon UK? But the final result could have been a lot worse.

Things seem to be going well for Gerrard but I’m still mad about Dean Smith getting sacked, I thought he deserved more time.

R7 yes, the result was definitely respectable and you should feel proud of your lads!

Being an LFC fan it obviously pains me a bit to talk about Gerrard doing well for other teams, but I genuinely do hope and believe that he will do wonders for the Villa. He’s got such an immense football brain, youse can only benefit.

That said, regarding Dean, I agree that it was ignoble the way the board let him go so soon and so suddenly. He had a vision that the club were backing, and it was clearly working albeit slowly. And he had so much love for the club, it poured out of him. So I was sorry to see him go, as I was sorry to see John Terry go.

But, “that’s football”, and “we move”, as Gerrard would say..

sorry but why is Jack so sexually obsessed with nice lads who play in midfield?

no strapping angry defenders or pretty strikers for this boy. he just wants a big strong solid man from the middle

'Grealish' is name invented by Charles Dickens.

'Grealish' evokes smoothness, gristle, deliciousness and easy bowel movements.

Jack’s hole is often very grealish (from overuse mainly🤕)

I wonder how Jack keeps his horniness under control when he's playing?

This guy looks like a weed dealer I used to know.

R12 honestly it seems like a struggle for him much of the time, and no wonder, considering his libido is about ten times more powerful than his brain.

Like, knowing if his kit is meant to be off or on at any given moment. Or if semis are acceptable when dressed in thin bottom layers on a pitch surrounded by cameras. Or whether it would be ok to come on to an opposition player in the tunnel. Or if he can get away with fitting a groupie shag in between showering and getting a car home. Taxing for a small sex-addled mind.

R13 your old dealer must be the smart upgrade.

Our Jack is not be intelligent enough to run a business operation even semi-successfully by himself, nor is he discreet enough to move illegal product and stay under the radar of police. Bimbos buy drugs and party, they don’t supply.

people who give declan rice stick about switching national team allegiance but don’t do the same to jack

i just wanna talk

R16, Jack probably gets slack because he lets the needs of his dick guide his decision making so he's not coming from a place of lack of patriotism, just his horniness makes him shallow like that.

R17 true. The current English national mens’ team are generally hotter and sluttier as a group than the current Irish one, so Jack probably figured he had a better shot at keeping his arse full and satisfied playing here in Blighty.

Wonder if Jack feels nostalgic for Eire on the occasional nights he nicks Declan off Mason & Chilly for a ride? Maybe even throwing in a few Gaelic words in with the moans and grunts and swears.

@R18 I love how that bitch Trent’s retaliation to Jack stealing his beloved Captain Hendo is to snag Tyrone Mings for himself👹

R19, Jack looking like the saucy minx with one leg sleeve rolled up in that pic there. Perpetually thirsty, always horny is our Jack.

R21 no doubt about that😏I daresay Jack is so needy and easy all the time that we could fairly call him a saucepot🍵

Of course, the skin in that pic was a bit of wasted effort on Deccers, who already knows without a demonstration what Jack’s like and how much copious physical attention he needs to function. And whose cock already belongs to Chilly & Mase.

Still, extra slut practise makes perfect..

Hearing whispers that his agent is talking to Chelsea..

Well, that’s hardly an apt move. He simply wouldn’t fit well. Perhaps if he were smarter....from another sort of family...

She’s after Scott Carson’s cock now. Honestly insatiable, like a bitch on heat.

The #1 sexy Christmas wish/fantasy for all British women polled is a night of fucking with Jack💀💀💀💀💀

Ladies there are so many other footballers who are way more fit and won’t give you the clap while they’re at it! Love yourselves more huns!!!

Imagine selling your soul for Champions’ League glory, then spending four months disappearing on-pitch and wasting your game minutes, and scoring but once in fifteen appearances, culminating in a preventable loss to RB Leipzig of all people in an apathetic showing during the final seconds of the group stages?

Are you not em-ba-razzed, Jack?

🚨 🚨 🚨 the headband is gone!!!! 🚨 🚨 🚨

....but sadly the City street uniform is not😞

(also the facial trim makes him look like a pirate)

Sasha now wants a baby more than she wants to be a model huh? She’s worked it out at last then😏

Run Jack run. Run away from Sasha. You're not monogamous and though you probably would be great with kids, but not with a mom looking for 18 years of child support checks to keep her in a WAG lifestyle.

Tbf R30 he can afford it so long as he stays above League 2, plus no-one realistically expects any footballer father/DH to stay faithful or be Dad Of The Year. He’ll be fine—not worldbeating, but fine.

In a way, they’re a good solid match. ‘Grifty and determined but obedient stalwart WAG from the block’ x ‘whorish stupid local man made good who needs a minder and a pragmatic firm hand’ Couple. She’s putting in the PR hours, he’s fucking about, the maid/Nanny/cook/tutor are doing all the domestic labour (and Jack sometimes, probably). What could go wrong?

[quote] “When they get the ball close to the box, my friend, you decide whatever you want. That's why you are Jack Grealish and not another player.”

Nah, Pep. He’s Jack because he fucks like a rabbit on speed. Any football Jack plays is just breaking up the day between shag sessions.

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City’s Insta sexually exploiting his legs for clicks as well. We love to see it!

Jack Grealish is the 21st century male version of Betty Grable!

Funny how ably and easily Matty Cash has replaced Jack as the totty at Villa Park. Look at those thighs!

In the aftermath of his female troubles, Jack now faces a tough decision over who to back between his old boyhood club & mates under Gerrard/Mings leaderships vs. his lover Hendo’s club, when Villa & LFC clash tomorrow afternoon. Tense!

He needs a tat on his ass: E A T M E

R38 and desecrate such loveliness?

Pep having a cheeky touch of the goodies, I see 🍑

Might as well, Jack’s not good for much else at the moment, is he?

Not very swag of C*ty to nick a goal off Wolves in injury time. At least play like you care boys, Wolves are a good side who deserved a good game.

Villa have fallen apart without him.

Sexy big dog Mings is having to slap his own lads around mid-game just to get them in basic formation and keep their shape, and to stop them catfighting.

The way Jack is sucking up to Raheem Sterling now that his place in the XI is under threat...disgusting.

It’s one thing licking arse because you like it and you’re a whore; it’s another to do it just to hang on to undeserved privileges.

I would say that Foden is the genius ninja Scholesy to Grealish’s showpony Becks, except for the fact that unlike Jack, Becks did actually work his socks off, stick goals in reliably, and made for an underrated all-rounder. Jack is lazy, only good on the left, and can’t seem to deliver finishes at Prem level. So it’s not the most apt comparison.

Move aside Emily, it’s Sash in Paree!

She’s like a plain soggy rice cake, isn’t she? I want to feel bad for her, and root for her girl power her to way to the top. But I just can’t with stunts like this going on.

Well, guess the blind squirrel found her nut...uh I mean net 🥅

Well done Jack sweetheart💫

R23 - who's that handsome guy with the black curly hair and big eyebrows?

R4£ that gorgeous young man sat next to Chilly would be Kepa Arrizabalaga, current starter goalkeeper for Chelsea.

He is notorious for his refusal in the 2019 Carabao Cup final to come off the pitch for a substitution when bid. Quite unsportsmanlike conduct, not to mention futile considering Chelsea lost that final (to Manchester City) on penalties anyway. How Kepa clung on to his place in the team after that little stunt, I still don’t know.

Cringe how it’s so obvious that Kevin de Bruyne doesn’t even want to touch Jack. He doesn’t want any Hep or HPV in that godlike body!

R48 - oooh, thanks for the info, I'll put him on my "list".

Little toerag has actually got the temerity to rib Bernardo for being “a tap-in merchant”.

At least he puts the ball in the bloody net more than once in a Sky-blue moon, Jack!

Imagine this bitch’s power if she hadn’t gone C*ty

Jack is a horny slut and I love it. He shows his endless sex drive. But Hendo, he is alfa, I can imagine being in bed doing whatever and however he wants me to do. One of those guys.

[quote] Hendo, he is alfa

Yes he is!

The best thing about Hendo is that he’s a *caring* Alpha. He’s clearly in charge of both his teams and he runs them with physicality, but also with a lot of affection and praise. He’s like the best Daddy figure.

And yeah, if he put on his tough Alpha voice and gave you that stare, it would be hard to stand up to....😳

It’s the way you can see Jack’s Brummie accent without hearing it

“Ow moy Guuuuud...”

Jack admits to NBC Sport that he’s had ‘growing pains’ after his move to City.

He looks zonkered in this interview, and his hair is a state. What is happening to our poor sweet boy?

Too much shagging, too much booze,and not enough sleep can take a fast toll on one's looks.

There’s no way he’s not at least a little bit fruity.

Maybe he thought ‘Man City’ was a gay club🍸

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Well, it’s finally happened. Grealish has been benched indefinitely for bad behaviour, along with the other England bad boys Foden & Stonesy. Pep hasn’t made any excuses for them, either.

No word of their exact infraction, but it’s rumoured that Jack & co. were out at a clandestine VIP evening event/club in Manchester, after the Leeds game last week. Also probably something to do with Jack’s ongoing substance abuse about which we peons aren’t meant to know.

Tbf I didn’t think Jack would actually last even this long before he got dropped, for some stupid fuckboy boozehound prick tomfoolery, so he’s exceeded my expectations by at least several working weeks. Or his new PR & agent are just top-notch and have been covering his tracks since October.

The Ciry fanbase won’t protect or defend Jack over this, the way Villans always used to. He’s in for a rude awakening this week.

So were Jack, Foden and Stones doing a triple penetration scene on some girl? No wonder Sasha isn't doing too well as of late.

R61 could be.

Either that, or they went to see Man City’s unofficial dominatrix...

Retraction: while John Stones was also dropped to the bench for the Newcastle game, it is understood that afterwards he did *not* join Jack Grealish and Phil Foden, nor go out anywhere else to socialise or take intoxicating substances.

The only reason the 29-year old defender did not play was because Joao Cancelo had served his suspension, recovered fitness and was due to start in the same position.

Love that Jack is seeding crumbs of his potential later-career move to MLS, so when in a few years’ time he’s inevitably loaned out to a low-mid table team then sold out of the Prem in indignity, he can point to the interviews he gave this week and show ‘proof’ that he did actually want to go to America all along (“loike wha Becks n Lampsy n Stevie G. did ini?”), so there! He’s telling us NOW so he doesn't have to tell us THEN.

Simon Jordan, that bitter garrulous middle-class Queen for some reason still employed over at TalkSPORT (he’s a failed club-owner, not a pundit or a journo or a former coach/player—why is he there?), has been aching for any glimmer of opportunity to tilt at Jack, and sure enough he was ready and waiting when the call came.

“Jack’s a moron.” “Oi! I know him. He’s a good lad!” “I don’t care if he’s a good lad or not.”