Which one of you bitches was mean to this guy?

I hope he goes out again soon with better results.

The guy in the vid needs therapy. I hope he gets it.

I’m trying to be sympathetic here because of this truly happened, that’s just mean and awful.

I am stuck, however, on the duality of someone who needs to “work up the courage to go out” but has no problem displaying such something like this for the whole world to see.

Poor kid. Bars are toxic.

My first time in a gay bar (I was terrified) I was picked on by a drag queen at the bar who verbally tore me to shreds. When I didn’t burst into tears I had passed the test. She bought me a drink, and gave me some good advice about navigating the gay scene and being assertive about safe sex. This boy needs a drag queen in his life.

Oh hun, clubs are for the beautiful people

Just another 1 who thinks he's an 8 thinking he can get a 10

Their are two places you never go alone; a snake pit and a gay bar.

This is so sad. I'm shocked at the fact that grown men would behave like bitchy, 15-year-old mean girls but, alas, we see this everywhere and every single day (it's not just gay men, and it certainly doesn't just happen in gay bars).

I hope he finds someone sweet that makes him forget all about this situation.

[quote]it certainly doesn't just happen in gay bars

I wish I was as certain about that as you are.

I don't think hazing is the norm in most social situations anymore, r5. Back in the day, every time you had to interact with a new group of people at school or work or whatever, the old-timers would put you through the ringer to see if you qualified to hang out with them. That's not so common these days except in a few social cliques, gay bars being one of them.

It's not a popular opinion but I've always felt that the gatekeeping and cliquishness has been part of the reason gay bars are closing, fewer people tolerate that kind of stuff now.

I'm shocked at the fact that grown men would behave like bitchy, 15-year-old mean girls

Are you new to the gay lifestyle?

This guy thinks his life is a movie. Ugh.

I feel badly for him but sac the fuck up, dude. You're chubby. Work out, or accept that sometimes some idiot is gonna point it out.

I dunno, again, I'm sorry for him, but he really rubs me the wrong way.

R11, It was in the Stone Age of the mid 80s. All that crowd of old bitches are dead or in care homes. The drag queen in question now has dementia, and apparently annihilates staff and residents on a regular basis. She was notoriously fucking nuts. Called herself Betty Hutton. Everyone in Glasgow of a certain age has a Betty Hutton story.

All minority groups seem to be a bit like this in my experience and it seems so self-defeating - it's a power action against conveniently weaker people when the best strategy would be trying to include as many people to band against the really powerful people.

"Worked up the courage"? I'll never understand it. If I want to go to the bar, movies, restaurants, or anywhere else I go. Alone, or not.

I couldn't understand a thing he said. Take the stupid mask off when talking to the camera, walking by yourself in the open streets.

This is what we get when we watch all those TV show/movies/YouTube and TicToc, where people act like assholes and are rewared for their behavior. The ones where backstabbers who insult others think they are funny, when in reality, thier just assholes. People think acting like a "Real Housewife" or someone on the cast of "Drag Race", or "Big Brother" is cool, when it's just patheti and sad. That said, I'm sure there is a bar that caters to his type.

[quote]I couldn't understand a thing he said. Take the stupid mask off when talking to the camera, walking by yourself in the open streets.

He was humiliated and run out of the bar in tears and now you want him to catch Covid too. You're a mean one, R17.

The straight world is just as toxic, str8 women are very judgmental and so are bros. It's not just a gay thing, but queens are more upfront about being bitches.

R16 You must be incapable of empathy. Even if it's not something that you have an issue with, I think that personally it's a scary thing for most people to go to a gay bar by myself for the first time and then if they're mean to you, why would you want to go back?

I think I agree with R11 on this. Okay, if you want to fat/ugly shame him, be mean to him, but don't complain as gay bars close and the community becomes more insular. I think it doesn't really take a lot to just simply be friendly or civil even if you're not interested in him sexually?

R19 That's not how you catch Covid.

Fake....Attention Whore Drama Queen...Stay out of the clubs if you cannot handle them. He looks 40 and THIS was his first time at a bar? Not buying it.

He didn't want anyone to see his face. Incognito, as it were.

He's not entitled to be let down gently just because he decided to try and hit on someone.

R24 except he did actually show his face in the first half of the video?? I am always nice/kind letting people down if they hit on me and I'm not interested. I consider it civility.

But that was before he was rejected ad began to cry. Afterwards, he felt a need to hide his face.

I went to a gay bar in New York Greenwich Village alone on a late night. I was young and deep in the closet at the time. My experience was pleasant but what I find surprising is didn't this guy try to get a feel for the place before he stepped in? Even in my naivete, I know I did!

He has no social skills. One can easily imagine what a mess he made of speaking to a stranger in a bar so that the person had to put up boundaries and enforce them.

You don’t have to decimate someone if you aren’t interested. I think a lot of gay guys don’t know how to tactfully and graciously let people know they aren’t interested so they go default cunt. At the same time, some guys don’t understand you aren’t interested until you finally say directly that you aren’t.

There is a lot of social retardation out there thanks to people interacting primarily on the internet. The irony is he probably would have reacted negatively if another fatty had come up and said hello to HIM!

I've been going to gay bars since I was 16.

R31 Is it hard to understand that some people haven't been going to gay bars since they were 16?

He did himself no favours by wearing the mask about his chin while having a drink in the bar. It looks ridiculous in that context. Either wear the mask or don’t.

If this actually happened…

1. The rejector was an asshole. As r30 pointed out, you can brush someone off without cruelty. We don’t know how persistent this guy was, though, and as r29 said, he seems to have low social skills.

2. Newbie Fatty needs to know his range, as r7 suggests. Maybe if he’d gone to a bear bar, he’d have had more luck. But 10:1, he doesn’t like the fat ones either.

3. The sobbing video is a plea for the worst kind of attention. He’s a fucking Empathy Vampire. Hot (and not-so-hot) guys post thirst pics. He posts pity vids.

I feel sorry for him, but not for the reasons that he wants.

Gay men are beyond broken.

She not ready.

R34 = Empathy Vampire?....That's a good one....((((applause))))

; [quote]I feel sorry for him, but not for the reasons that he wants.

Oh, yes. Well stated.

I'm with r23, I suspect he may have gone up to the hottest guy in the bar and made a jerk out of himself so that he could post this vid to perhaps get some sympathy. if it happened at all. Just because he said it happened doesn't make it true

I feel bad for him. He's trying to get out there. Usually, peoples' advice is to join groups, talk to people...get out there! Don't stay home...blah, blah. This is how it backfires. People can be motherfuckers and just plain mean. After something like that, how would anyone want to try that again... unless you have a very strong ego.

I much more liked the kid saying he loved toxic masculinity. This guy's what we used to call a pill.

When someone is casually cunty toward others, it says more about them than the target of their derision. It sucks gays can be the worst offenders though.

A few years ago I was at a gay pride parade, trying to find a place to watch the festivities (this was in Germany and I wasn't familiar with the route). It was so hot outside and despite being thin and in shape, I tend to sweat pretty easily. However, while I'm walking along and minding my own business, some cunt looks me up and down, then turns to his friends and says, "Why are people sweating? It's not even that hot?!" Of course he said it from his position in the shade, but it momentarily made me self-conscious enough to want to leave.

Anyway, I stayed and continued to sweat my ass off. I figuref out of tens of thousands of people, someone with supposed friends despited to pick me out and talk trash. Meanwhile, people who are happy and having a good time with friends don't tend to notice random strangers walking past them in a matter of seconds.

Yeah I am suppose to give a shit. This guy is playing it up for an audience, clearly, so I am unsure how much real pain there is.

Not his first time. He had the “nerve” to make a video of himself acting out with the eyes wide and side to side. He’s a fat sloppy effeminate jerk. Nobody wants the fat loser acting into their camera. This must be Chicago. It’s full of fat slobs like this.

I think if that if this had actually happened this guy is the type who would be mortified and kept it to himself. Telling the story to the world and risking further humiliation just doesn't add up. If it really happened he would have a video of the actually rejection.

It's almost like a Karen video saying she was attacked by two black men with no proof. Substitute Gay for black

He’s probably used to using apps and probably just walked up to him and told him he’s hot instead of starting a casual conversation. Too many gay gays are too “transactional” in how they engage other guys.

Of course it's that annoying Chris Evans guy attacking gay men.

Ugh that’s sad.

[quote] Their are two places you never go alone;

Apparently for you, one of those places is English class.

[quote] I feel badly

See a doctor. You may have nerve damage in your hands or fingers.

[quote]I am suppose to give a shit.

Oh, dear!

[quote]I am stuck, however, on the duality of someone who needs to “work up the courage to go out” but has no problem displaying such something like this for the whole world to see.

i know, right? the conundrum of contemporary society

Fuck you, spelling Nazi twat @R49.

What R8 said was infinitely more amusing than anything that could possibly come out of your rancid, putrid pie hole , R49.

I sort of think this is set up (i.e. fake). It seems a bit contrived. Would a self-proclaimed recluse who is sensitive about how they look have the nerve to chat up a guy their first time out? Being a recluse myself, I know I’d probably never go to a gay bar by myself - I’d at least find a hag to go with. And I’d for sure never chat up a guy - I’d wait for someone to chat up me. I think he’s trying to expose the reality that 7+ guys don’t look twice at anyone they think is beneath them. Even if a self-proclaimed recluse was to go out alone, they’d at least know that cardinal rule. So either he’s lying, or he’s completely clueless.

Yeah r29 that's one thing but telling someone they shouldn't be flirting if they're fat goes way beyond "putting up boundaries and enforcing them"...

I’ve only been to a bar a couple of times. I don’t like slaveholder or the snarls of alcohol. But I’d it all about pickups? Couldn’t I go to a bar and maybe start a conversation with someone and perhaps make a connection? Discover we have stuff in common and maybe just make a new friend? If I were to go to a bar it would be to make new friends and meet guys. Not to take someone home with me. I just want to make friends

But r39 his tears were profuse. Has he mastered the art of Karen crying?

Seems like some of you were in that bar.

R46, transactional is right. Guys get annoyed with me because I don’t go home with them the night we meet. Then, they can’t commit to getting dressed up for a fancy din din. Don’t these men understand that I am simply giving them the opportunity to see me in the daylight? I look good in the dim lights of a barroom, but under the unforgiving rays of the sun….. I look my age.

I wouldn't approach someone unless they were giving me "that look" and I was sure I had a chance with them. Otherwise, I'd just wait for someone to approach me. And if they didn't, it's better to go home disappointed than in tears I suppose.

R56 - he’s on TikTok for a reason.

@r55, yes making friends in a bar is very possible. I have several lifelong friends that I met in bars. I always went to bars to have fun and meet new people, if I got laid that was an added bonus

Awww poor thing. How hard is it to let someone down gently if you’re not interested?

So, you wouldn't talk to all the people who look like you, but wanted the attention of the much more attractive person and you were HURT and SHOCKED that he, just like you, did not want to talk to unattractive people? OK then . . .

R30 is right - say no with some tact and grace. Imagine being in their position, shouldnt be difficult because most of us will have been there.

That said, if someone is annoying persistent then a blunter approach is in order, but not until then

He is not remotely my type, but you may find he can still be a good friend, and good friends can be just as important as a partner at times

What's a gay bar?

He should have let other people start any conversations with him and not initiate conversations himself, unless it was with fellow fatties or fuglies. The good-looking egotists at the club will interpret any initiation as flirting, and will then interpret that initiation as an insult if it looks to them that the person initiating the conversation believes that the good-looking person is low enough quality for the other person to believe they had a chance with him.

This guy needs to start a gay potluck group.

Or a potbelly group.

I want to see the guy that he approached. Not to justify whether dropping him rudely was right or wrong but to assess any possible delusion of this guy.

What really happened: to build up some courage to approach his target, he first got himself slobbering drunk, then approached his target in said condition AND got a little hands-y, target rightfully got pissed off and told this fat slovenly creep to fuck off.

"I hate humiliation!"

-- Guy who posts video of his humiliation for the world to see.

Maybe next time his opening line shouldn't be:

"I want you deep inside me. Buy me a drink?"

Fat hoe needs to go on a diet.

I dont buy it. He's filming himself before and then gets a 1 in 1000 response and then is the 1 in 1000 person who is willing to share his own reaction to that online? People in gay bars don't usually make incredibly nasty comments to someone who just says hi.

I feel sorry for the guy. I know the courage it takes to into a gay bar for the first time. Luckily, my experience was a positive one. It helped that I was young and handsome at the time. If you don't fit a certain look or prototype, gay men can be absolutely ruthless.

Interesting, but not surprising, that this guy is being blamed somehow for having the audacity to approach one of his betters.

All sorts of theories excusing or explaining the behavior he may have actually experienced.

Guys like him must make your lives a living hell. Such a weight to carry when you're a superior gay.

One guy at the bar calls him fat and somehow everyone in the gay community is responsible? So what about every other time he was called fat in his life who was he blaming then?

R74, That's what I thought, too. Everyone on social media wants to be a victim, they know how much attention it will get them.

There is no "community" in the gay community. It's a bunch of mean-girl cliques, and people who never graduated from the High School mentality.

After decades of trying to fit in, trying to "find my community", I've given up. I never go out to gay bars anymore, ever. I only have a very small handful of gay friends. Most of my friends are straight. They're far less mean.

[quote]One guy at the bar calls him fat and somehow everyone in the gay community is responsible?

Dude. If you read the replies, you'll realize that the experience is pretty universal for anyone who doesn't have a six-pack and showy biceps/pecs.

Going to a gay bar is like going to the Met Gala.

Bunch of vicious narcissists trying to out-pretty everyone else.

Except the gay bar smells more urine-y.

I do agree that straight people are more forgiving of body flaws and the inability to hit the gym 2x a day 6 days a week. Gay men haven't evolved to that point yet.

This is fake. He would have showed the interaction and gotten more likes.

He'll be fine once he accepts that the best he can do is to get a homeless guy over the age of 65 with schizophrenia and a year's worth of accumulated dick cheese. He'll be fine.

This has nothing to do with the "gay community." It's just about those specific assholes.

For the guys reading this and think that all Gay bars might be like this, they're not. If you're new to the scene start out with smaller neighborhood bars. The guys are friendlier and you might make a few friends. Then if you want to hit the big meat markets go with someone who can show you the ropes so you don't make a fool out of yourself

I don't believe this guy for one second, he's a lonely attention whore that got exactly what he was looking for, attention

He probably chose a stand and pose bar, which is never a good idea if you're not good looking. It can be a soul crushing experience. He should've opted for a bar that attracts bears and other assorted fatties. He would've left with whatever self-esteem he had intact.

I’ve experienced this too, when I first came out in the nineties. But gay life is not about just bars anymore, thank goodness. Deciding who to go to bed with or choosing friends while under the influence of booze and/or drugs. And yes, just like in straight bars too.

But gay bars are a special kind of toxic. Because you’re going there for acceptance of who you are…and you get your face broke.

I miss the gay bars. At least they'd give you a live preview of what you're about to go to bed with. With the apps, so many guys use fake or old pics to bait other guys. Can you imagine thinking you're hooking up with a guy who looks like a CK underwear model, and some fuggo like this appears at your door?

When a gay man is bitchy, suddenly the gay community is evil.

When a gay man uses his creativity to make the world s more beautiful place, it is “the queer community” or the “lgbtqiaa2s” community.

All gay men should be required to serve two years in the military right out of high school.

After that, they will be able to handle assholes in gay bars.

Learn to read a room, man!

[quote] After that, they will be able to handle assholes in gay bars.

Pun intended?

It's gets better...but only if you're buff and good looking. It's a sad truth that no one likes to talk about. You think you're entering an all-embracing loving community, but often you're faced with the same or even worse type of rejection/marginalization you experienced from your straight families and friends after you came out. It's rather tragic.

STAGED CLOUT GRAB

That dude really needs to toughen his hide. Send him to work at DL Corporate Headquarters. Poindexter, hire him!

If that really happened to him, why on earth would he start recording a video about it?

ugh, 2's who think they're 8's who think they can get 10's. She needs some self-awareness. Tres pathetique!

How “evil the gay community is”. And I love all of the favorites on that twitter account. Soon white gay men, and that’s who the twitter person is referring to, will be tossed into concentration camps. It’s also why I will never support CRT because minorities absolutely despise white gay men, worse than straight white men. Once these individuals have power—goodbye white gay men.

It didn't used to be that way for most clubs, most of the time, r6.

In the 20th century, EVERYBODY had to go to clubs to meet people. Maybe this guy needs to find a more down-to-earth club, but they're all going extinct these days.

Everybody should have the opportunity to enjoy dancing and socializing regardless of their looks. I truly pity the younger generations.

Jesus, R99 is as big of a drama queen as the TikTok guy.

"Gatekeeping and cliquishness" got a thousand times more severe with social media, r11.

Now you're entirely filtered out.

C’mon dude. Apparently you are a small business owner. Open up your wallet and pay the hustlers or stick to the Only fans. Especially if you can’t handle honesty.

[quote]Jesus, [R99] is as big of a drama queen as the TikTok guy.

Call me whatever you want. Republicans support gay rights more than blacks. No thank you!

But r25 thinks she's entitled to be impolite without social consequences.

Bye, gurl! So much for your chances of ever having any class.

I agree that the black community loathes white men, especially gay white men.

R104 claiming that “soon” gay white men will be “thrown into concentration camps” is the very definition of being a drama queen.

@r96, "That dude really needs to toughen his hide. Send him to work at DL Corporate Headquarters. Poindexter, hire him! "

Tell him to bring a bottle of good scotch and a carton of Lucky Strikes, Muriel will love him forever

Paging r35!

Your grease fire is waiting in the lobby.

EVERYONE has been there, r64.

Even the hottest men can't get everyone they want.

I'm a 9 and if that creature approached me in a bar, I'd have told him the exact same thing. It's actually a good thing for him to experience. Maybe it will motivate him to hit the gym, get his teeth bonded, and undergo plastic surgery to give him a more prominent jaw line.

Sober-up and go outside for some fresh air, r90.

Why are people such assholes? Being gracious doesn't cost a thing. A simple "no thank you" was all that was required. You never know where people are in their life. Why potentially make someone's life worse?

[quote]I agree that the black community loathes white men, especially gay white men.

Loathes is being nice.

The sky is always falling on right-wing dirtbags like Boris @ r99.

Conservatism can be summed-up in two words: IRRATIONAL FEAR.

Blacks have a complicated psychology in this country.

Call me “Boris”, call me “rightwing”, call me a “drama queen”—Republicans still like gays more than blacks.

Lord. Big deal. Somebody at a bar was mean. It sucks for sure, but it's not worth crying over. Get some tougher skin, get back out there and learn how to bite back.

And boy is "Critical Race Theory" a big stretch from demographic plurality.

Republicans always have to Trump-up some hysteria.

F&F r104 for Fake News and gaslighting.

My first time at a gay club was so intimidating.

I went on my 21st birthday. The hot bouncer checked my ID and sang happy birthday and I was so embarrassed!

Then I went out for a smoke and another bouncer told me my fly was open cause he was looking.

I had assumed they were straight bouncers playing cute.

But so embarrassing.

I was more embarrassed by those guys than when I got trashed later on that night and ended up knocking over every table and chair on my way to the bathroom to throw up at the Dominos next door.

Here are all the ways Trump and the Republicans "like" the gays:

[quote]The RNC is hallucinating and advancing misleading and disingenuous rhetoric. Yes, Trump has taken many ‘unprecedented’ steps, but those steps have been to undermine and eliminate rights protecting LGBTQ people, not empower us. Appointing a small handful of gay people out of thousands of nominations and making a very few -- and unfullfilled -- pledges can hardly qualify as accomplishments. Don’t gaslight us. The Trump-Pence administration is the most virulently anti-LGBTQ administration in decades -- the RNC cannot put lipstick on a pig.

@r121, You sound like fun, I like drunk guys with their fly open. Let's go out sometime

[quote]Now that we're on top of the food chain, we forgot our past, so we hide our insecurities by pointing out someone else's.

This is a comment from Twitter.

If you think non-straight people, gay men in particular, are at "the top of the food chain", you need a SERIOUS reality check.

My first forays into gay bars were just as terrible. When I first came out the Chelsea bars in NYC were the rage. I didn't realize there weren't all that bitchy.

It was disappointing visit after disappointing visit. I would just stand there, not knowing even how to approach anyone and no one approached me. It was a good year before I found there were so many other bars, all with different sorts of people. I was so surprised when I discovered that there were actually nice, chatty guys at many gay bars.

R121, that attention meant they were being friendly, not that they were embarrassing you. So much better than being ignored or hissed at.

Sadly these kinds of experiences make one develop a thick emotional shield

[quote] I went on my 21st birthday.

[quote]Then I [bold]went out[/bold] for a smoke

You’re young yet. For most of us, we smoked inside the bars.

Ooooh, did the poor dear ask a hottie to direct him to the buffet?

Ouch! Bad first move.

What exactly is he saying under his mask? I cant understand

That Twitter poster also doesn't know that gays and straights alike have always been lookist and always had Mean Girls and Guys, r124.

He seems a bit aspie to me

Aww, Patty Arquette is a class act.

[quote] Soon white gay men, and that’s who the twitter person is referring to, will be tossed into concentration camps.

If memory serves, it's usually the white men who are running the camps

It was really mean and cruel to have treated him that way, but when i feel vulnerable, i usually don't go out to places like that until i feel better and in a better head space to deal with assholes

But you’re hot, r135!

For some reason I thought Millennial and Gen Z gays were nicer to each other. I guess not. Can I go back in time and cry on camera about my first time experience in a gay bar? Is this how we grow now? Learn from our experiences?

white gays are vicious

MEAN GURLZ!

[quote] did not want to talk to unattractive people

Well, really, who does? No-one.

[quote] If that really happened to him, why on earth would he start recording a video about it?

Because it will help the coroner determine that his death is a suicide.

I am more than half-tempted to reply to his tweet, warn him to gird his loins, and direct him to this thread. If only because I would love to see his reaction to to some of the more-than-awful comments here.

This reminds me of the movie, "Marty", which was on TCM this past weekend.

R142 Majority of the comments here are sympathetic to him though. The meanest so far IMO is the poster calling him a "creature" that needs to bond his teeth and get jaw surgery.

I was so shy I would stand in the shadows against a wall. Once someone threw a glass at my head. It missed, but I got some glass bits in my eye. Nothing damaging.

I soon realized they weren't the place for me. I'm more of a coffee shop 'n conversation type.

It looks bad when all the racist and judgy stuff within the gay community gets exposed to the public like this.

Too black and fat? I can kinda see the bitches on here saying the guy should work out or whatever. But he can't change his race. Maybe the "community" should throw a disclaimer saying only fit white/latinos are allowed in the club and to participate.

[quote] It looks bad when all the racist and judgy stuff within the gay community gets exposed to the public like this.

Unfortunately, it's all too real.

I would say that it's a good thing to hold up a mirror to the gay community, so we can see what we TRULY look like.

But I don't think the racists and haters care very much at all. They wear their nastiness like a badge of honor.

There's a club, if you'd like to go

You can meet someone who'll really love you

So you go and you stand on your own

And you leave on your own

And you go home and you cry and you want to die

Crying for a few minutes after being shot down at a club?

Honey, try WAILING FOR TWENTY MINUTES while you MOURN YOUR LOST DIGNITY!!

I've never had a good experience at a gay bar and avoided them because of it. Pre-Covid I had a business trip that took me to several American cities and I decided I'd try to visit a historic gay bar in each.

I was really surprised. I was in my late 40s and I felt that I was the youngest person present at each place. The other patrons clearly knew each other and I was pretty much invisible (which was okay, I wasn't looking to be picked up, but even the bartenders seemed completely uninterested in a paying customer). I was usually dressed a bit formally, so maybe they thought I was slumming? It was a corporate trip, so I didn't bring a "play" wardrobe. The drinks were uniformly horrible, as was the music.

I was very depressed and felt that I'd completely missed whatever time it was that these places had been hotbeds of gay social life. I know they were important, but it seems as if what's left is just tourist traps and drunk tanks for the elderly.

There are people who are attracted to heavier, beefier men. It's more to love.

In all seriousness.....I do sympathize with the guy. Both bars and clubs can be really negative spaces. Bars tend to have one of a few crowds. If you're lucky, you'll find a friendly bar with a welcoming, neighborhood vibe and they DO exist. But you may also find the bar that's the alkie hangout and/or is filled with people who are three steps from death OR you'll find the extremely competitive meat market bar.

Clubs, I've almost never had fun in, save for a handful of times when I went dancing with friends.

I have no opinion on his looks (not my type, but he's someone's type) but if he went to a club, he may have (as several people above have said) aimed at the wrong audience. And audience IS a good description, because this is all a weird sort of theater.

I feel for the guy because I’ve been told the exact same thing. However, I’ve been told I was too fat to even try to be friends with someone. I’m down 120 pounds but damn if I still don’t have the same mentality. I’m always afraid someone is going to be mean and harsh like that.

And he probably is “seeking attention” on TikTok because online is the only safe space he has in a way. If anyone is mean to him, he can easily block them or report them for harassment. It also stings less than in real life.

And you can fault him for no social skills but he’s most likely been treated this way his entire life.

R34- I was at a bathhouse the other night. Some of these guys just barge in they don't stand outside my room first and try to gage my interest or cruise me, even so I am still polite when I'm not interested. I just say- no thanks.

It's hard to meet quality guys in bars and clubs. Most of these guys are not looking to make friends or for LTRs, but rather are looking for nothing more than a hot guy (usually hotter than them) to hook up with for the night. They're not going to waste their time with guys they find unattractive. That's the cruel reality of it. If you want to meet a quality guy who is looking for something more than surface beauty, try volunteering at gay organizations and nonprofits. However, I suspect this guy is looking for someone totally unattainable and out of his league. That will just end in more tears.

That's kind of fucked up.

But I guess it did LITERALLY end in tears.

Excuse me! STILL wailing here!

Well, most of his generation would turn to Tinder, r155.

But he's just going to run into the same problems on Tinder and Grindr unless he's using totally fake pics, where he's just delaying the heartbreak until he meets his victims in-person.

Maybe online he just gets blocked or ignored rather than, "How dare you flirt, fattie?"

R130: I couldn't understand him either, so it would be nice if someone could tell us exactly what happened instead?

If I had an AR-15 and they did that to me,I would have pulled a Pulse in Orlando. Seriously

Was he wearing nailpolish?

Some dude told him "he was too fuckin' fat to be flirting with people".

That's it. That's the whoooooole thing. That.

I’m sorry that the guy was hurt, but he’s not operating in the real world. The chubby guy only walked up to the cute guy because he found him attractive. There were probably dozens of other men there that night, and he picked someone he liked solely because of the guy’s looks — and nothing more. He rolled the dice and came up short. Thems the breaks, doll. 🤷‍♂️ You made your move based on looks — and so did he. Game. Set. Match.

Now, the good-looking guy is nevertheless a jerk, because there are ways to reject someone without being a Grade A jackass. But even so, don’t start blaming the rest of us; this is not the fault of the gay community. We don’t have the mechanism to police people who are being jerks.

I think straight guys are better at taking rejection than gay men.

R163- I used to go to a bar called The Works on the Upper West Side Of Manhattan in the mid to late 1990's. For a while I used to see a guy there who totally looked like a caveman who would hit a woman over the head with his club then take her back on his back to his lair.

This guy obviously wasn't into women. Every time I saw him at the Works he would go up to a REALLY good looking guy and start try to pick him up. He would ALWAYS strike out. Which was satisfying to watch. He felt entitled to the best looking guys- JUST like a straight guy feels entitled to the prettiest/hottest girls.

R164 tell that to all the female murder victims

Why have some people brought race into this? That guy said nothing about race in his TikTok. The Poor guy went looking for a little kindness and got a big dose of reality. I'm gay. I love being gay. I love other gays, but gays can be mean. We're talking 15 year old high school girl mean. He probably read a self help book that said take a chance on meeting new people and he did and it blew up in his face. Next time, he'll know better.

R166- or the woman who've had ACID thrown in their face

The fatty is putting that on or that was his real reaction to the rejection? If its real, why didn't he go to a bear event? It must be horrible to be him.

I didn't have this experience at all in my gay life because I was a knockout, tall, handsome and highly educated. I could go anywhere alone and have a good time or get whatever I wanted, usually.

EXCEPT for I had some expert advice when I was young. I used to be the suck in the cheeks poser for a year or so, a fantastic looking snob, and then a gang of black working class queens took me up and taught me to be NICE and to be sociable because I would have a better time and people would have a better reaction to me as well. And its good to be nice.

I never noticed gays going out of their way to be directly and gratuitously mean to fat people or ugly people. I mean snobby, elusive or dismissive - but outright mean such as "you're too fat to talk to me"?

I guess my looks spared me a lot of ugliness.

Oh, poor sweet honey chile … three words: PTown Bear Week

R169- I WAS A KNOCKOUT, TALL, HANDSOME, AND HIGHLY EDUCATED-

how nice for you

Also, my prime was the 80s and 90s. And big International cities. I just don't remember many obese people being around. If any. Usually none.

I think Americans are quite fat now so it must be more routine for everyone to deal with fatties and I have a hard time believing they get such hate direct to their faces. Especially if a lot of young people are kinda fat.

R172, do you live under a rock?

You should.

Let's see the guy who rejected him. I've been in enough of these places to know how low the the social skills can be.

[quote] Poor guy went looking for a little kindness and got a big dose of reality.

Nah. He went looking for dick. Which is why he picked out a cute guy.

He did, however, get a large dose of reality. If you’re going to play the looks game — which is precisely what he was doing — you better know what you’re bringing to the table. Doubtful though that he understands that. He’d rather play the victim and blame the “gay community.”

You have to have balls of steel to survive in the gay world. The sad fact is that if you're not good looking or don't have a decent body, nobody is going to want to have sex with you, and many guys won't even want to be platonic friends with you. You have to toughen up and accept that fact if you're going to be in the life.

And the message that sends R176 is that people can be too ugly to have friends. That’s where the gay community could better itself. At least be nice to people.

[quote]Nah. He went looking for dick. Which is why he picked out a cute guy.

He said the guy was cute, we never saw the guy. And as we've seen on DL a lot of you think the most basic, average guys are cute. The guy was cute to him, we don't know if he was real world cute.

This can’t be the first time he realized he was fat

He’s kind of Crood-esque and looks like a schlub.

It could be the 3,990th time someone has been mean to him though over it.

I would think we’ve all got a version of this story. Try therapy, a support group, hit the gym, and if you live in a larger city, find a gathering spot where they worship your “type.” It will get better, you just have to discover your tribe. It seems we’re the only minority with this task. Here’s a hug ((()))

Awww. He should stay off TikTok, though. Glad social media wasn’t around when I was a kid.

He should join a church choir. Plenty of pickings for him there.

My first time going to gay clubs was when I was studying abroad in college. I had to go alone because I had no one to go with. Poor me I guess, but it was exhilarating seeing so many men! Some I found attractive, some not. But hey, I was having a good time dancing and drinking I decided to make a move on guys, and you know what I quickly realized? I'm not every guy's type!

I got rejected by a number of guys, but I also did my fair share of rejecting too! It goes both ways and you just keep playing the mix and match game. You'll find plenty of guys who want to flirt and hookup or be friends. All else fails, just keep the whore dial at 11.

However, being a loner at a bar, recording yourself sipping a drink like a 5 year old, and making creepy eye movements is a fucking sure way to turn people off. Add an emotional breakdown that you post on Twitter when you look like you're in your 30s, and no man is going to want to deal with that.

Let's not assume it's a kinder place inside a bear bar or at a bear event.

They're just big 16 year old girls wearing tank tops, a carpet of fur, and the faint outlines of their CPAP masks. They can be as cunty as the thinnest, dimmest twink.

Anyone can be cunty, R186.

I cant ever imagine giving a shit what some Mean Girl queen in a bar said to me. I hit my first bar at 15 and I quickly realized just how shallow and petty some queens can be and decided right then and there to never let it bother me one iota. ive been in bars from one end of this country to the other and I always had a good time . Its how you feel about yourself ,and I always liked me just fine. Of course I wasnt half bad looking and was very outgoing (especially after a few drinkie poos) . I never had to approach anyone,they always approached me. Lets put it this way...the last time I went to a gay bar was on my 55th birthday and before the night was over I had several men around and we were singing "Just one look" ! In a disco it was quite the scene. AND on that very same night a very cute younger couple wanted to take me home for a 3 some ! No,I didnt because I got way too polluted but still !

You go to a barbershop 💈, you’re gonna get a haircut.

I think R150 really nails down the plank in the adult argument of this debate around which everyone else is pussy-footing.

As a fellow traveler, I too, have been “to those bars in those cities” expecting some recognition of empathy, if not community, and only seen it exchanged between the regulars there. At least I have not had to suffer both bad drinks and playlists at the same time.

I'd like to see a pic of the love interest.

Work on yourself - he's not a bad looking guy. Eat healthy and workout - he could have a lot of men. But nooo....can't do that!

I'm going to be honest here. It's a sad fact of life in 2021 that my first reaction on watching this video, after being mortified on his behalf, was to wonder if this really happened. I know after decades on the gay scene that some gay people are evil. So I can believe that someone might say this to him. But just how common is it really? How unlucky would you be to encounter this the first time you ever go alone to a gay bar?

You sound extremely obnoxious, R188.

Ew.

The fantasy of R188 is some campy fever dream. Drinkie poos? Not bothered one iota! He's met mean queens and became one, from one end to the other. End. Pa is 78 years old, minimum. No one is singing some faggy Linda or Barbra song in any "disco" bar for at least 35 years now. Happy 80th B'Day gramps!

I like me just fine too. But y'all are hilarious. Your post is satire or sad. Funny tho.

He should go to a bar with a more mixed crowd. Straight guys are friendlier (and hotter) than bitchy gay guys.

Put your phones down boys. Go out into the world and experience it without documenting it. No one wants to see some random guy dude acting like a complete pussy. I have no time for these fools.

R196, I imagine he has no support system whatsoever.

He’s fat. He does not belong in places where hot gays may be forced to look at him.

You can be fat and still look and dress nice. In the video, the guy didn't look well groomed. i guess i'm being nitpicky.

So gays have incels too.

[quote] Of course it's that annoying Chris Evans guy attacking gay men.

He has a gay brother. He should know better.

What city was this in?

Twitter is saying Chicago, R202. Roscoes or Sidetracks. Which would fit.

One of the weirdest things about mean gay guys, is how sometimes it seems to be a cover for them actually liking you. I've had guys say rude things to me, and the next time I see them they are all over me and wanting to fuck. I think sometimes it comes back to that arrested development thing - like the boy at school who pulls on the girl's hair just to get her attention. I don't respect that though (I'm kind to people and I expect that in return), and I can't bear watching gay guys berate other gay guys, especially if they're trying to forge a friendship with me by excluding someone else.

I love to dance, but that environment is not for me. I always tell guys though: you don't have to go to clubs to meet people. Get involved with hobbies that you love and you will meet people that way and through them will meet guys more like the type you are interested in. Most gay guys I've met have been perfectly nice. It's the ones who make their entire life about Friday and Saturday nights out on the town that are insufferable.

Most gay people enter adult life wounded by abuse or feelings of being rejected. Some rise above that and choose to be better than the people who abused them. Others lash out and want other people to suffer like they did. Some abusive behaviour is pre-emptive, they fear they'll be rejected or humiliated and want to get in first.

Gays in bars are THE WORST and that's something that many of us learned "In the field". BUT I find it hard to believe--ESPECIALLY with access to so much information nowadays (movies and social media etc. )--that he would be so unprepared to enter such soul-crushing territory without his defenses up.

Am I terrible for laughing as he was crying into his phone?

Dude needs to work on his game.

Don't be such a pussy.

What a fucking loser, the stupid female voice and eye rolling feminine face and crying like a little bitch

Don’t be a pussy bro!

Who knows if this is even real. Why was the camera only on him the whole time?

Are we sure “he’s” a he?

Coddling this guy won't help.

He's needs to toughen up (and lay off the guacamole for two seconds.)

R210 he has facial hair

[quote]Call me “Boris”, call me “rightwing”, call me a “drama queen”—Republicans still like gays more than blacks.

And they like white gays more than Black gays, and they like gays and blacks better than Jews. It's been the same hierarchy since Reconstruction, hon.

For some reason, this reminds me of:

Sad to be obese and middle-aged so early in life. Worse, she's a sook. But infinitely worse, she uploaded a film of it to weep to the world. This is the country that fought a war? FFS. It needs another one.

Matt Bomer would never fuck Bruce Vilanch. Welcome to the gay world, hon.

Chicago? Ugh, of course. He went to Roscoe's, where those hissing prisses would scorn even jocks and porn stars.

R149- The cuteish guy on the right is obviously a SUPER MORBIDLY OBESE chaser. I don't know why they are called Chubby Chasers. Charlie Sheen in the mid to late 1980's was a bit chubby but someone who weighs over 400 pounds is NOT chubby they are SUPER MORBIDLY OBESE.

How come he didn't just buy a drink and quietly nurse it in a shadowy corner, secretly eyeing the hot guys from afar, but never daring to enter the Pretty People Zone of the bar?

Doesn't he know how gay bars work?

Still need to see the alleged 'pretty people'.

[quote] You have to have balls of steel to survive in the gay world. The sad fact is that if you're not good looking or don't have a decent body, nobody is going to want to have sex with you, and many guys won't even want to be platonic friends with you. You have to toughen up and accept that fact if you're going to be in the life.

I wonder how old you are. I'm gay and my gay and bi friends are normal guys like my straight friends. I never experienced this kind of stuff and I used to be a chubby bear.

It’s a painful lesson to learn. He will have to find his safe space.

One of my best friends nervously entered a gay bar for the first time when he was 23. Another guy sat down next to him and chatted him up. One thing led to another and they are now married, 6 years later.

[quote] R210 he has facial hair

So?

Are you really basing it on that?

I'm sure he doesn't have great social skills

R223, a unicorn in the world of gay romance.

[quote]He should go to a bar with a more mixed crowd. Straight guys are friendlier (and hotter) than bitchy gay guys.

The point is to hit on someone not "take advantage of them" like some straight guy raping a drunk chick at a party.

[quote]Chicago? Ugh, of course. He went to Roscoe's, where those hissing prisses would scorn even jocks and porn stars.

Are we really talking about Chicago? Hissing prisses sounds more like Dallas.

I hope he doesn't smell bad. Sometimes big people smell bad.

Chicago has the worst and nastiest gay men ANYWHERE in the country.

They're fucking awful.

Midwestern Flyovers who think that they're living in Paris.

It's really sad.

I’ve never met a gay man from Chicago who was nice either, r230. What is it about that city.

I've heard that gays in Wrigleyville can be very accommodating.

I'm from Chicago and I'm nice... Sometimes

R232 I miss the Wrigleyville cumdump.

No sympathy for him. Looking at his tweets, he’s quite the bully himself

I don't support being mean to him.

However, if the handsome guy was at all polite, I suspect our inexperienced chubbette-soubrette would have taken it as a GREAT sign of interest and not left the handsome guy alone until: a) handsome guy ghosted him or b) handsome guy said "Sorry, I'm not into you that way."

It would have ended in tears no matter what.

R236 that’s bullshit and you know it.

A lot of gay men display typical mean girl behaviour in situations like this. Women are like this too, except they’re more likely to treat a man like shit if they feel his socio-economic status is lower than theirs. Despite their complaints about “toxic masculinity”, women are its prime enforcers.

White gays are the deplorable of the LGBTQIA community. Thank god there are now many queer spaces free from their menace.

[quote]Sad to be obese and middle-aged so early in life.

R215 your comment reminded me of Mrs. Meers "sad" quote from "Thoroughly Modern Milly."

R235, you've confused the guy who tweeted the video with the guy who made the video. Ziggi is the guy who went to the bar and got shut down. He does comedy bits on TikTok.

No one should be treated badly because they're fat but dude it happens. But the fact is there are vain and petty people and also people that just won't be into you. If you put yourself out there then there is always going to be a risk of rejection. As a pretty hefty guy myself you either steel up or I guess you go on tik tok and cry about it.

Maybe he and that other fat fuck from Texas can put on a roadshow and tour the country. They can call it the Wailing Whaling Follies.

Patricia Arquette is right. He will make someone happy one day. Someone whose just short of a 2.

I think this guy was nuts to post this, but that's the culture now to put all your feelings out on social media. But what concerns me is that a lot of you seem to be trying to normalize bad behavior.

People can date/hook up with whomever they choose and don't have to answer for it, but you don't have to reject someone so viciously. There is a way to say move on toots, without actually having to say move on toots.

Since this is DL and many posters love to project, OF COURSE, you would focus on his weight instead of making suggestions.

Bless his heart. Apparently no one told her the rule at the clubs is “No FATS or FEMMES!”

The guy he approached sounds like a bitchy bottom so it was going to end in tears for her anyhow because miss tik tok seems like a big Mary.

[quote] you don't have to reject someone so viciously

Of course you do. How else are you going to feel better about yourself? You really don't have this whole gay thing down pat, do you.

[quote] OF COURSE, you would focus on his weight instead of making suggestions.

What are you talking about? Many people have made suggestions right here in this very thread.

Lose weight.

Hit a gym.

Hit on someone in your league.

Stop fucking eating.

There’s a wealth of suggestions here.

[R16] - Agreed. 20-30 years ago, when I was a young gay man, I would go to gay bars in Manhattan with friends or alone. No difference. WTF? This guy really does need help in developing a stronger sense of self. Also, I can't imagine why he would even post himself crying and wallowing in self pity like that. It only makes the guy at the bar look like he made the right choice.

I also get tired of unattractive guys (which I think the Tik Tok user is) whining about "cute" boys never hooking with them. I wonder what his reaction would be if he were hit on at a bar by something even less appealing than him. In other words, bitch please.

You guys are all nuts, there's no proof that any of this really happened, but this guy is sure getting a lot of attention off this video

You all have been snookered

Dude needs to learn how to flirt.

When you're in the bar and see a guy you like, you first see if the other guy returns eye contact, smiles at you, etc.

If he does, maybe you go in and introduce yourself.

If not, move on. Don't force an attraction that's not there.

Sounds like the fat guy just barged in without finessing the situation. That makes a lot of people uncomfortable.

And it's passive-aggressive of the fat dude to make the cute guy responsible for the fat guy's feelings.

Deep down, fat dude knew cute guy would reject him, confirming fat dude's victimhood, which, more than likely, he uses to avoid taking personal responsibility in his life, and excuses his lazy fat fuck lifestyle.

I'm just gonna say it: it's fake. This is one of those same black queens who are always dissing white gay men as being "racist" etc. He knew exactly what he was doing. He's been to gay clubs before. He wouldn't mosey on into a bar and be so confident to try to hit on guys or pick someone up if he were some doe-eyed twink. He's a shit stirrer. The gay, moral equivalent to those black students and professors who stage noose hangings on dorm and office doors and then report them as hate crimes.

Many, if not most American black people have some burning need to perpetuate the myth that America is overwhelmingly and aggressively racist against them. It isn't true. Stop eating this shit up like sows at the trough. It's okay to call it out. You aren't racist just because you call bullshit on it. Meanwhile, native Americans, Asians and Hispanics are routinely harmed and marginalized, while African Americans are coddled as a fictitious minority, incapable of empowering themselves. It's a line I don't believe anymore.

This guy would be at least an 8 at the Monster amidst all the other fatties and fuglies.

I think that he's looking for "fat acceptance," the way that LARGE WOMEN have demanded it in the media.

Notice that fat women are now in nearly every television commercial, including modeling commercials? They have demanded it.

The new "Female empowerment" is all about embracing fat women, bald women, women with skin conditions, etc.

YOU MUST LOVE ME BECAUSE I'M FAT AND A MINORITY AND I LOOK DIFFERENT!!!! I guess he was expecting the same sort of acceptance that the media has tricked him into believing is a reality. But it's not a reality.

What this guy doesn't realize, is that the gay community doesn't play that game. Their mentality is still stuck in 1950's.

No fats. No fems. No ugly people. No minorities.

Gay people and Deplorables are pretty much the only people in the country who still haven't evolved.

Evolved?

No. We just don't fall for the "Lipstick On A Pig" routine.

[quote]you've confused the guy who tweeted the video with the guy who made the video

ah I see, it's on Edw*n's Twitter

Did Dove offer this fat fuck a TV commercial yet?

This is now a lead story on Yahoo News.

Yes. I am shaking my head.

[quote] Did Dove offer this fat fuck a TV commercial yet?

The ice cream company or the soap?

r20, no straight women would accept your drink and then tell you they have a bf. I don't know anytime being out with the girls in a bar where someone said, oh you too fat, you can't talk to me.

[quote]I think that he's looking for "fat acceptance," the way that LARGE WOMEN have demanded it in the media.

I did check out some of his other Tik Tok videos after this thread was posted.

Here, he goes after another (black) guy who called Lizzo "entitled" for not liking plus sized men, when she's morbidly obese herself.

We don’t know who the other guy is or what he looks like. So all the peeps saying he was “out of his league” or he was punching up is an assumption and not necessarily fact. He could have approached another fat, black/brown guy for all we know.

This is more due to how he was treated. Society today seems to have lost the plot on how to treat others and empathize with others and see things from their perspective. We are going downhill

[quote] This is now a lead story on Yahoo News.

🙄

[quote] Here, he goes after another (black) guy who called Lizzo "entitled" for not liking plus sized men, when she's morbidly obese herself.

So in other words, he rejects fat guys himself. He only goes for thin, good looking guys.

And when called out on it, he gets upset.

Got it.

[quote]R236 It would have ended in tears no matter what.

Or Dollar Tree pound cake.

Fattie should get a wig and go trans

What a pussy

He needs the confidence of some of our gay black DLers, such as the Hoboken Package Thief, who I just saw in another thread bragging about his 'superhuman intelligence, good looks, raw magnetism, and amazing life story', or the Ancient White Fags troll, who claims to be extremely good looking, muscular, and has '23 cm' between his legs.

So the fat dude wanted to deny the cute guy agency over his own body?

That's like rape.

Not cool, fat dude.

Not cool.

Everybody sing along...

The basic bear bitch was just mad that the alarm sounded.

Can someone build a time machine?

Then go back to the day R253 was born. Snatch him from the doctor's forceps and then flush him down the nearest toilet? A courtesy flush would be nice--just in case he comes back up.

Well, bless Miss Jane Pittman at R273. You DRANK from that fountain, ma'am. Sip that fucker!

I don’t know why gay men are like this. Nasty and cruel to each other. Even the beautiful ones are wildly insecure and vicious to one another. I don’t miss the bars at all.

Okay, he could stand to lose a little weight…that’s fine. But nasty, toxic queens in bars, looking for drugs, daiquiris and dick are on the prowl and don’t have time for niceness. I have witnessed and experienced situations like this in bars from blacks, whites and all the colors in between. Hopefully, the community will continue to evolve.

But I doubt it…

Drag culture is the bitchiest.

That is hilarious. Shows what happens when you don't have a functioning nervous system like the turd Millennials. They think the whole world has to kiss their retarded asses. I remember going to gay bars back in the 90s and gross older men would try initiating shit. None of them had full on nervous breakdowns like this turd when you shot them down.

Maybe I'm not cynical or bitter enough, but I can't believe that anyone, no matter how self-aware he is of his attractiveness/hotness, even in the bar scene, would just basically tell another guy to buzz off because he's too fat. Something doesn't add up.

Anybody who lets some drunk ass barfly/disco queen get inside his head is an idiot.

[quote] Maybe I'm not cynical or bitter enough, but I can't believe that anyone, no matter how self-aware he is of his attractiveness/hotness, even in the bar scene, would just basically tell another guy to buzz off because he's too fat. Something doesn't add up.

Correct. Because this never happened. Or if it did, Fatty Boomblatty just earned her Victim card.

Bar people are assholes.

The sky is blue.

It's not rocket science.

A lot of young gay men have warped social skills. The drunk bitch who said this may have thought they were were being sassy.

Is this ugly thing black? Samoan? He's so fat I can't tell. He's just a vague tub of ugly ooze.

Whatever makes gay men seem evil while they do shit that straight people do ALL THE TIME, right?

I need to see the bar's security cam footage.

Let's see some receipts.

I didn't believe Meghan Markle and I don't believed this rhino, either.

R286 don’t bring her into this please…she’s got nothing to do with how nasty people are in bars…

People everywhere treat fat people badly. It's not exclusive to the gay community. while I doubt this happened the way this stupid fucking twat claims if it did then it's just proof there are assholes everywhere. Bitch needs to grow the fuck up.

A lot of people suck. They are shallow and cruel. Especially gay men out for drinks trying to "throw shade" or " read someone" like the drag race/other reality show nonsense they obsess over. Trying to get a laugh or a story to tell their friends later. The fat guy should have said, "well clearly you're a cunt so I think we are done here" and moved to another part of the bar and made a friend. If you give someone else the power to wreck you like that, you will have problems for the rest of your life. Man up. Or woman up. Or gay up. But just move on.

We don't even know what he said (or did) to the other guy to receive that response. What did HE say?

Maybe the other guy was drunk.

This is all very one-sided and there really is not enough information to take the side of either guy.

And what was the last part about he is not gonna go by himself again? Everybody gets rejected at some point - even if it is by someone you're dating. What's he gonna do the next time he is rejected? Have his friends help beat the guy up?

Go back to being a recluse man. It sounds like you don't know anything about human nature or how to behave in public.

And why is the retweeter blaming the entire gay community for one incident?

This happens all day everyday all over the world in gay and straight bars. Why is he so special? This whole generation with their helicopter parents and participation trophies thinks people owe them something.

They don't.

[quote] This guy would be at least an 8 at the Monster amidst all the other fatties and fuglies.

Oh honey. It's called the Monster for a reason.

[quote] The fat guy should have said, "well clearly you're a cunt so I think we are done here" and moved to another part of the bar and made a friend.

HEY !! Don't try to foist the porker petunia on us! We have enough friends.

He needs a hug.

^^^

He needs a lapband

He needs a functioning brain and nervous system. As do all Millennial turds.

[quote] He needs a hug.

He needs a dietician.

He needs a hug from a dietician!

Why's it so hard for posters to believe this happened OR whether it COULD happen.

I've overhead some mean/crazy shit in bars which is why I RARELY approach people. Being rejected makes me feel like shit, BUT if that person was an asshole about it--which has never happened to me, LUCKILY--that "Terminator effect" would take over my central vision.

[quote]Why's it so hard for posters to believe this happened OR whether it COULD happen.

They've never been to a gay bar and experience the entirety of gay life from behind a computer screen.

[quote] He needs a hug.

Yes, a tight one. Around his neck.

[quote] I think it doesn't really take a lot to just simply be friendly or civil even if you're not interested in him sexually?

Oh honey, no. The slightest bit of kindness would definitely be misinterpreted and then they'll never leave you alone. Also, in their mind, you're leading them along. Even if you're as blunt as "I'm not physically attracted to you, but we can share a drink and chat for a few minutes" will raise their hopes that they just need to win you over with their delusional sense of wit and charm. A smackdown is actually the kindest thing you can do for all involved.

BTW, has anyone considered Mr. Hottie's perspective. He's also there to get laid (or whatever) and looking for someone equal to his league. He doesn't want to waste time with the dregs, and having blimpo hang around is also going to deter further flirting for him. He didn't go to the bar to support some sad, lonely sob sister stranger.

I also agree with the previous poster who said he needs to learn how to flirt and how to read signals.

It's not that I don't believe him . Although I don't. But even if it happened exactly as he claims. So what? There are assholes everywhere you go who will treat you like garbage for no reason at all. To act like this is more prevalent or exclusive to the gay community is stupid. If you put yourself out there rejection is always a possiblity and more than likely when you're a narcissistic idiot who probably went in there looking for exactly this to happen so you can try about it in tik tok.

No, it’s not an excuse to be mean, to say that it’s happening in the heterosexual community as well.

It's not an excuse. It's just reality. Sometimes people won't like you and sometimes they won't be nice to you. It's life.

R295 you sound bitter and old and why GenX is gonna be more insufferable than Boomers in their dotage

Everyone hates Millennials. They are scum. Even Millennials hate Millennials. Because they are scum.

And what's with this fear of going out by yourself?

If I'm gonna go out and cruise men, I want to be alone, and I want to meet people who are alone.

Friends and hangers-on are total cock blockers.

r306 you sound happy and sane

Some of us have a hard time believing it for a number of reasons

1) It's 2021 and everything is performed for social media. People enact scenarios that are not reality based.

2) some may possible have never been victims of such asshattery

He should watch this spot with the great Joan Rivers and Sweet Connie. He can get lots of attractive mens if he just wasn't so choosy.

[quote]Especially gay men out for drinks trying to "throw shade" or " read someone" like the drag race/other reality show nonsense they obsess over.

You always meet these gay guys who seem to think being Patsy Stone or Karen Walker is something to aspire to be. I have very little to do with guys like that.

I believe that a lot of posters here who aren't believing it, do so because deep down, y'all are actually all a bit kinder than you will admit. You don't want to think it's true because then you can imagine the hurt and you feel bad for this guy, so it's easier to just say he made it up.

(It does have to be said too that a lot of stuff IS performative these days, which naturally makes people suspicious, but I'm also prefering to believe that most of you are much more cuddly teddy bears than you want others to know x - except R301, the exact type of unpleasant gay guy I have always avoided when out.)

This clown has accomplished his real objective, which is adding TikTok followers -- no doubt Yahoo featuring this bullshit story has been a huge windfall.

[quote] Friends and hangers-on are total cock blockers.

Sometimes. I've flirted with guys who were in a group and then went home with one or more of them. And on the contrary, when I used to go on the prowl (just before the advent of hookup website, pre-apps) with friends we would split up and share horror stories. Or, we'd see each other the next day. But I also used to go on my own: Barracuda, Splash, G, Hangar, Uncle Charlie's, Waterworks... I'm sure none of those places is around anymore.

[quote] except [R301], the exact type of unpleasant gay guy I have always avoided when out.

You must be part of the sad, lonely sob sister brigade. Don't worry about avoiding me. I'm sure I would never have even seen you.

I assume we're supposed to feel sorry for this guy but BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Anyone with that thin a skin needs to get off social media where they're constantly affirmed about how special and amazing and unique they are, and try living in the world for a change.

He should do a series where he attends places and tries to do stuff and then leaves crying and weeping afterwards because people were mean to him. I'd watch!

Like, he inspires meanness in me, for some reason. I want to be mean to him and make him cry.

[quote] He should do a series where he attends places and tries to do stuff and then leaves crying and weeping afterwards because people were mean to him. I'd watch! Like, he inspires meanness in me, for some reason. I want to be mean to him and make him cry.

LOL. I think that's what they call a punchable face. Oh, and I'd watch that TV show too!

If it makes you feel better R301/R314.

I'll never understand people who feel they have to tear others down just to make themselves feel better, but that's just me.

Fake News Klan Granny @ R253.

F&F

Even if this is “real,” it is still deeply fake and calculated. The guy was shooting himself at the bar, complete with exaggerated eye movements, because he was planning on putting together some kind of video story later - presumably ending with him bagging a cute guy.

When it goes south and he’s so mortified that he runs out of the bar in tears without finishing his drink, he still has the presence of mind to film himself; and then goes home in his misery to edit, title and post his humiliation for the world to see — instead of preserving his dignity over “creating content.”

The poster above who said this is sad, but not in the way Chubsie Wubsie intended is quite correct.

[quote] I'll never understand people who feel they have to tear others down just to make themselves feel better, but that's just me.

Wait. You don't understand yourself? And here I was thinking you were just a hypocrite, but turns out your obtuse.

R320 he said THAT'S JUST ME, which absolves him of any logic.

I'm still floored that Yahoo made this a national news story.

The inmates are running the asylum.

Well, what else is there to report about? Inflation? Chain supply collapse? Immigration? January 6? The Durham Report? COVID? It's been a slow news year.

Sad Boy need to up his plus-size flirting skills.

[quote] your obtuse

Oh DEAR

Obama would have invited him to the White House garden for a beer and a pep talk.

And Michelle would've intercepted him, made him work out for an hour, and given him a salad from the White House garden.

Sasha and Malia would have rolled their eyes.

R326 - r328 your obsession is noted and concerning.

And Marion woulda slapped all you bitches and said leave her family out of your petty racist bullshit!

bacist rullshit?

huh?

R324- When I was in high school ca. 1982 I worked at a gasoline station pumping gasoline, I was not a mechanic at 16 years old. There was an Irish guy working there who looked just like Chubsy Ubsy from the Little Rascals. This guy was such a bigot too. He would see a black woman he would sometimes say - I'd fuck that chimp. Who would fuck you CHUBSY UBSY? I'd say to myself.

R294- He needs Dr. Nowzaradan.

R285- Probably - thin, good looking WHITE guys

Sorry my comment was meant for R265

So, it's his first time at a gay bar? His first time out alone? And he not only records it, he's premeditated the visit enough to be able to record, apparently, without holding the camera/hiding the phone? He then, after being so completely traumatized by the fact some DRUNK was mean to him. is able to get home and download, edit, post, etc. etc. etc.?

The more I go back to see it, the more fake it all seems to me. He was trolling. He did this for a reason. He also wanted to make very, very sure than it was white gays who were being evil to the sweet, gentle, highly attractive, full-figured black guy, didn't he? Not only is he being fraudulent, he'a race baiting.

I hope someone messages Yahoo and that they turn around and investigate his little investigative journalism project.

[quote] he'a race baiting.

Are you Italian?

R336- The faces he's making in the bar look SO rehearsed and as someone else pointed out earlier in this thread- Why does he NOT wear a mask in a crowded bar but wears a mask when he's outside by himself?

The takeaway here is don’t approach people in bars if you’re unattractive. People in bars are absolutely looking to hookup but they also don’t want to be approached or engaged by people who they aren’t attracted to. In a bar, if you are attractive, you will know it because people will tell you.

My very first time in a gay bar was in 2007 at age 21. I was by myself and was mortified. But I had a great experience because I was deemed to be “beautiful”, and so never had problems picking up guys. Because of this positive reinforcement I had the confidence to initiate random conversations and had even more success with guys.

The bar scene can be brutal if you aren’t attractive. It has nothing to do with race either, I am black and it was mostly white guys trying to get with me.

You sound like such a narcissist, R339.

Well, I guess the guy in the video won’t be invited to Thanksgiving or Christmas dinners.

r340 I hope he posts another crying video about it. WAHHHHHHHH

[quote]Well, I guess the guy in the video won’t be invited to Thanksgiving or Christmas dinners.

Not unless they cook up a 30 lb. bird.

This fat clout chaser. Everyone know 2’s going after 6 and 7’s get rejected. Also poor guy looks like the moonfaced Tik Tok troll from Brooklyn .

So staged. Plus sucking on a big foofoo cocktail with the big Bette Davis eyes was probably cringe to the dude he talked to.

The guy he called CUTE might have been someone we dl people would consider very average looking , maybe someone who was another bear type.

[quote]r290 We don't even know what he said (or did) to the other guy to receive that response. What did HE say?

He presented hole, then was kicked in the cunt bone.

R340 STFU, narcissism troll. There is no such thing as "narcissism". Fucker.

[quote] Not unless they cook up a 30 lb. bird.

Are you kidding? To him, that’s the Cornish game hen of turkeys.

Somewhat off-topic: I’m not a Tik Tock user; can someone explain what that voiceover narration is that is heard frequently in Tik Tock postings? I take it it’s an AI-generated voice?

Nobody feels sorry for this guy. Man-the fuck-up! Rejection is a part of life.

It is ok to feel bad, but to film yourself crying about it, and then put it on social media afterwards?

These are all calculated steps to garner sympathy when he actually should be embarrassed.

I wouldn't give a mutha fucka the satisfaction of seeing me cry over this bullshit, much less share it with the world.

Who would wanna date his weak insecure ass after this? I wouldn't.

Bitch if you are on DL, you need to delete that shit before it is shared any further. You look stupid!

Bleak Lives Matter

Is he a virgin?

R349 It is an AI voice narration. It was quirky in the beginning but its overuse has made it annoying now.

He would probably walk away if someone who looked like him approached him. It’s always these twats who are insanely hypocritical about this. Same with older guys. It’s always the hottie that turned them down that’s the bastard, but if another fat dude/old guy were to approach them, they’d do the same thing.

[quote] Why does he NOT wear a mask in a crowded bar but wears a mask when he's outside by himself?

Absolutely tragic. Had he worn a mask at the bar, he would have increased his chances of hooking up substantially. Well that, and standing behind a potted plant. And not talking. All that would have helped.

[quote] Bleak Lives Matter

I FEEL TRIGGERED! Oh wait, no, that was just gas.

IMO the only difference between this poor guy and Kyle Rittenhouse is a gun license.

After the ball is over

After the break of morn -

After the dancers' leaving;

After the stars are gone;

Many a heart is aching

If you could read them all;

Many the hopes that have vanished

After the ball

A gay bar is the BEST place to go alone. I always meets people and overall, people will often invite you to join and hang out. Especially when traveling alone, gay bars are the best places to meet locals, etc. If I ever get attitude it's usually from people who are less attractive. Hot people are too busy being hot to bully some random dweeb.

I agree with whoever said that OP's guy "was so brave and worked up the courage" to go to a gay bar but then post his "rejection" for all the world to see. I guess that's where I lack courage.

People are desperate for likes and subscribers that they will debase themselves or feign in just to get attention, which is the most basic of cheap whoring and not in the good way.

Gays are cheap petty whores in and out of bars. This man is not overtly ugly or very different from a lot of people. He's about 35 years younger than most of the old white f@gs criticizing him on this site.

He can lose weight, you can't get your dick hard again.....

Y'all and all y'all are bad tempered and in poor taste. The boy's tik tok video is silly. But the hate here is about something else. Out of proportion. Rejection is a part of life. Being called fat and ugly in public settings is the end result of toxic online culture. 80 year old white men saying shit like this on DataLounge erryday! Like it doesn't hurt someone?

Gay bars are not the way to meet men anyway. Not for over a decade. We go out with friends to show ourself. Fine as fuck. Period.

I sure hope you're pretty R360 ,because you damn sure sound illiterate .

LMFAO!! 🤣😂🤣 Gay men like him who aren't as attractive or healthy looking and fit, blame hot and fit gay men for turning them down; and that makes the hot gay evil!? The gay guy who got told the truth while trying to pick up gay guys who were clearly hotter and fitter than him, is the problem! I don't go around expecting gay men who are clearly hot and upkeep their bodies like an Adonis, and expect them to desire me and take me home etc, because I'm not a delusional cunt. He wants to remain a 3, and do nothing to better himself, but expects a gay guy who is a 10 who upkeeps their body etc to just lust after him!?

I'm handsome, hung, muscular, black, educated AND literate. Under 40. What's your problem R361? You are triggered. I don't "sound" illiterate at all. Your post is nonsensical. Put the bottle down and go to bed gramps, aka R361.

R360 Types at a grade 5 level, tops. He is NOT illiterate.

R363, what other fan fiction do you write? You're good at fantasy world building.

Roxane Gay

Well, if he had consulted us on Datalounge before making tis decision, we could have sufficiently warned him that this would end in tears. He found out the hard way.

SAD.

I'm not sure if I'm going to explain this well, but when I do look around online, there does seem to be this real movement to show the awfulness of gay men over and over again. And I mean, we all know there are some really nasty guys out there - just as there are all over the world. And we know about how shallow some situations may be, etc. And we discuss them or complain about them, but we also know this isn't the whole story, nor is every gay man like this (in fact, the majority I meet are just normal, everyday guys). But all this "calling out" of "evil gay men" from within our own communities (the Pride community if you will) is really becoming a thing now, which I think makes things sound worse than they are. And believe me, I've been subjected to some really unnecessarily nasty behaviour when out. But I've never felt the need to blame the entire gay male community for it.

There are wonderful people out there if you look for them and stop trying to gain the approval/attention of the assholes.

R369 Don’t forget the few shrill transwomen who will gladly generalize gay men as the bane of the community.

[Quote]Their are two places you never go alone; a snake pit and a gay bar.

Really? I often went by myself in my younger days I didn't want to be seen with someone who might be mistaken for my partner or boyfriend.

This has been dragged up after a year. Wonder how the lad is doing. But if it were my first time at the bar and I was alone, I'd likely just sit and watch. Wouldn't have the courage to go up to someone. If someone spoke to me first then its okay but I give the guy balls for being not in shape and initiating conversations.