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British DLers, please explain this Rylan Clark-Neal mess

The black-shoe-polish hair and beard, the sandpapered face, the gay divorce complete with on-air breakdowns…

What is this? Why is this? Wouldn’t you love your employers to suggest you take a whole year off to be sad too?

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by Anonymousreply 13October 21, 2021 6:18 PM

The texture. It looks like he went through every bottle of mommy's make-up while she "popped down to the shops." He seems to use one of those beard guides to create some sythentic arc, the sideburns widening at the base of the ear and coming 'round the jawline like those chinstraps starlets were always wearing to bed in 1940s films. Plastic and prissy as fuck, everything about him.

The homunculus husband on the other hand looks like a dirty fucker, not good dirty, just unclean and likely to wipe his stinky hole on all the soft furnishings.

by Anonymousreply 1October 21, 2021 11:50 AM

I cannot stand him. He looks like a freak with his dyed hair and oversized veneers. He has been plugging away for years, utterly talentless but determined, and has finally succeeded in getting onto mainstream TV and radio. They are even using him to sell car insurance, but I don’t know what demographic they are aiming him at. To top it all his honking Essex accent grates on me.

by Anonymousreply 2October 21, 2021 12:08 PM

I think it’s more of an Essex thing than a gay thing. He keeps the housewives entertained, like a modern day Dale Winton. He’s been around forever, started as a no-hope X Factor contestant.

On a small island, it doesn’t take much to catapult one’s self to fame, if you’re determined. Like that Tulisa bitch whose opinion seemed to matter about everything a few years back. For nothing, no reason. Cheryl Cole was just a minor league ahead of these two and then collapsed when Cowell tried to launch her stateside, just like that Welsh dude that left Americans scratching their heads.

by Anonymousreply 3October 21, 2021 12:27 PM

OMG. I haven’t seen a photo of Rylan in years! That’s a global supply of fillers in his face!

by Anonymousreply 4October 21, 2021 12:30 PM

At least the Welsh dude was gorgeous!

by Anonymousreply 5October 21, 2021 12:33 PM

He's wearing enough foundation & powder for 3 people in that left side photo in the OP.

by Anonymousreply 6October 21, 2021 12:36 PM

He's a daytime TV presenter. What more do you need?

by Anonymousreply 7October 21, 2021 12:51 PM

I just listened to him interview Sugababes on the radio. He's likeable enough.

by Anonymousreply 8October 21, 2021 12:53 PM

So dreadful to listen to, he makes even that pandering brainless chuffer Nick Grimshaw seem tolerable on the radio.

by Anonymousreply 9October 21, 2021 1:15 PM

He's always irritated me, but I'm not sure if it's him per se, or that he looks exactly like someone I know in real life who is insufferable.

by Anonymousreply 10October 21, 2021 1:37 PM

'I have made a number of mistakes which I deeply regret and have inevitably led to the breakdown of our marriage.'

GIRL WHAT DID YOU DO!!!

by Anonymousreply 11October 21, 2021 3:54 PM

I enjoyed him on BOTS, where the camp worked well.

by Anonymousreply 12October 21, 2021 3:59 PM

I like how masc she is!

by Anonymousreply 13October 21, 2021 6:18 PM
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