A female who doesn't have any female friends.
What are some other examples?
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A female who doesn't have any female friends.
What are some other examples?
|by Anonymous||reply 476||November 27, 2021 4:42 AM|
Posts on DL.
|by Anonymous||reply 1||October 17, 2021 1:41 PM|
Believing anything on DL.
|by Anonymous||reply 2||October 17, 2021 1:55 PM|
Is a princess, first name Diana
|by Anonymous||reply 3||October 17, 2021 2:08 PM|
When you meet someone for the first time, either a new neighbor or co-worker at a new job, and they immediately start bad mouthing other people.
|by Anonymous||reply 4||October 17, 2021 2:54 PM|
They're way too eager to get close to you way too fast. They're super charming and cool and nice and generous. And then suddenly they say or do something shockingly cold or rude, and then switch immediately back to being the super charmer. And that right there is the single most telling indicator that you're dealing with a disordered personality: the feeling of total confusion about who this person is and how you feel about them.
Unfortunately, pretty much every comedy and romance coming out of Hollywood features a lead character who acts like this and is presented as the ultimate desirable friend/love object, so you're likely to default to seeing them through the lens of a movie or TV show in which somebody acts like this and it all turns out all right, rather than saying "There's something wrong here" and backing off, which is what I'd advise you to do when you run into somebody like this.
|by Anonymous||reply 5||October 17, 2021 3:03 PM|
[quote]A female who doesn't have any female friends.
Yeah, that's a big tell. Women tend to be much more convivial than men and even introverted women will have one or two friends they hang out with, unless they've burned through them all and nobody's speaking to them anymore.
|by Anonymous||reply 6||October 17, 2021 3:07 PM|
They frequent your house way too much just after meeting you
|by Anonymous||reply 7||October 17, 2021 3:11 PM|
Alienating family, airing family business to the press and moving to California
|by Anonymous||reply 8||October 17, 2021 3:12 PM|
[quote]They're super charming and cool and nice and generous. And then suddenly they say or do something shockingly cold or rude, and then switch immediately back to being the super charmer. And that right there is the single most telling indicator that you're dealing with a disordered personality: the feeling of total confusion about who this person is and how you feel about them.
Yes. This woman I work with.
|by Anonymous||reply 9||October 17, 2021 3:14 PM|
They have a chronic disabling disease that mysteriously gets better when they want to do something.
|by Anonymous||reply 10||October 17, 2021 3:23 PM|
Boys becoming men—men becoming wolves.
|by Anonymous||reply 11||October 17, 2021 3:44 PM|
Dumb, unnecessary, easily disprovable lies.
|by Anonymous||reply 12||October 17, 2021 3:45 PM|
People who try to paint themselves as a victim as soon as you meet them
|by Anonymous||reply 13||October 17, 2021 3:48 PM|
They literally mail shit to their enemies.
|by Anonymous||reply 14||October 17, 2021 3:56 PM|
Has friends only from work, or no friends from work. Closest friends are very recent. Speaks to none of their exes.
|by Anonymous||reply 15||October 17, 2021 3:56 PM|
Has more than one tattoo.
|by Anonymous||reply 16||October 17, 2021 3:57 PM|
They display a Trump 2024 flag in their front yard.
|by Anonymous||reply 17||October 17, 2021 3:59 PM|
Their children don't speak to them.
|by Anonymous||reply 18||October 17, 2021 3:59 PM|
R10 Or a long-ago diagnosed disorder that requires a prop that's always on-hand but never used, the years-old expired asthma inhaler or a bottle of Xanax with the label worn off.
|by Anonymous||reply 19||October 17, 2021 4:00 PM|
Displays a swastika on their person but claims it’s not what it looks like and is actually a symbol of divinity and spirituality
|by Anonymous||reply 20||October 17, 2021 4:01 PM|
Having no friends from work seems sane to me.
|by Anonymous||reply 21||October 17, 2021 4:03 PM|
[quote] Women tend to be much more convivial than men and even introverted women will have one or two friends they hang out with, unless they've burned through them all and nobody's speaking to them anymore.
OP/R6 well, I was unlucky enough to fall ill and then become extremely depressed—not the celebrity “I was a bit sad and letdown over a breakdown” shit, but the serious type, locked in a dark room crying and not contacting anyone or eating or bathing for days and weeks at a time—in high-school and college, and so lost the handful of good close longterm friends I had from young (as an introvert, I didn’t have that many to start with) via a pretty brutal dumping on their part. They all chose to stop speaking to me and walk away, I had no part in that decision. And I get it, I respect it, no hard feelings—they had their own new exciting post-school lives to lead, and didn’t want my darkness and difficulties dragging them down or holding them back.
Now it’s several years on from my University graduation, and though since then I’ve been steadily working to recover my physical and mental health (it’s a slow arduous agonising process), and I’m in a much better and even functional place now, ultimately I haven’t been able to manage to build a consistent social life, or even a friendly relationship with anyone outside family (I’m close to my siblings). Because, newsflash, people are judgmental, and only get more so with age—anyone seen to be hanging out with someone not the picture of wellness and success (even superficially) risks becoming a pariah too. No one wants to go there. I try my best to hide all my problems going in to relationships, but it’s like I always get found out.
So yeah, looks like I’ll be in my 30s soon, and it is likely I will not have any close friends by that point (male or female), let alone a partner. Going by experience, I expect judgement and suspicion from all corners over this, whether from people gay or straight. But I can’t help that, or change what’s happened, or pretend that my situation is any different. I hate this cliched thought-ender, but it really “is what it is. The best I can do is work toward creating new strong lasting friendships for when I’m in my 40s & 50s or beyond (Golden Girls style!). Can’t dwell and live in the past.
|by Anonymous||reply 22||October 17, 2021 4:10 PM|
Lives that move from one catastrophe to the next
|by Anonymous||reply 23||October 17, 2021 4:13 PM|
They tell you that you remind them of a long dead family remember that they were very close to, then try to glom onto you and and try to become part of your family. Inviting themselves to family functions, posting your family pics on their social media, talking about family memories as if they were there.
|by Anonymous||reply 24||October 17, 2021 4:14 PM|
A history of initiating lawsuits, as well as a fear of being sued, are red flags for narcissistic personality disorder.
|by Anonymous||reply 25||October 17, 2021 4:16 PM|
Is Donald Trump
|by Anonymous||reply 26||October 17, 2021 4:16 PM|
r24 is oddly specific
|by Anonymous||reply 27||October 17, 2021 4:16 PM|
|by Anonymous||reply 28||October 17, 2021 4:17 PM|
A woman whose wedding is attended by hundreds of strangers and her own mother.
And I did warn my brother.
|by Anonymous||reply 29||October 17, 2021 4:18 PM|
I went to school with a woman who'd always find a way to tie anything into her horrible mother. We could be talking about Schindler's List and she'd be like "you know who was worse than Hitler? My mother." I'm not doubting that she went through some shit, but I really do think she thought it made her more interesting.
|by Anonymous||reply 30||October 17, 2021 4:21 PM|
R18 or their kids emigrate with their own family/partner to the literal other side of the world and don’t come back.
The way my Uncles moved with my cousins (their kids) to New Zealand twenty years ago just to get away from my toxic manipulative bitter grandmother, and I haven’t seen them since.
|by Anonymous||reply 31||October 17, 2021 4:23 PM|
People who constantly text to stay in touch. "What's up?" "How was your Monday?" "Did you ever start watching Ted Lasso?" LEAVE ME ALONE, STALKER
|by Anonymous||reply 32||October 17, 2021 4:23 PM|
There are a wide range of disordered personalities. The borderline seems like what most posters are describing, but the antisocial personality disorder is someone who lacks empathy and will dodge the rules for their own ends. If you've seen many of these, they've sometimes spent time in prison. Some have never been caught. Above average intelligence isn't a hallmark of the personality disorder, but those with antisocial personality disorder typically have above average IQs.
|by Anonymous||reply 33||October 17, 2021 4:26 PM|
According to a psychologist friend, many clinicians develop a sixth sense about interacting with borderlines. It feels like a sinking feeling in the pit of the stomach, he said.
|by Anonymous||reply 34||October 17, 2021 4:27 PM|
My apartment building is new, so we are all tenants on our first year of lease. I've encountered a nuclear family of husband, wife, boy and girl (teens), a few times. The guy is very outgoing in a bluff and hearty way, but the wife and kids strike me as almost downright antisocial, consciously avoiding interaction with most other people. I could be mistaken, but I'm coming around to the idea that in private the guy is quite domineering, so that the three of them are psychologically cowed.
|by Anonymous||reply 35||October 17, 2021 4:32 PM|
|by Anonymous||reply 36||October 17, 2021 4:39 PM|
Gets mad when you don't text them back right away.
Thinks nothing of texting paragraphs before you can respond.
|by Anonymous||reply 37||October 17, 2021 4:41 PM|
You see her out at a sleazy bar wearing a red wig, flirting with all the guys, and calling herself Niki Smith.
|by Anonymous||reply 38||October 17, 2021 4:42 PM|
They want to be my friend.
|by Anonymous||reply 39||October 17, 2021 4:49 PM|
R27 a guy I worked with. Claimed I was "just like his brother" and tried very hard to get involved with me and my family to the point that it felt like he was stalking us.
|by Anonymous||reply 40||October 17, 2021 4:55 PM|
How did you get rid of him r40?
|by Anonymous||reply 41||October 17, 2021 5:00 PM|
R20 That's not subtle but it is unmistakable.
|by Anonymous||reply 42||October 17, 2021 5:06 PM|
A duplicitous friend / coworker . A person who loves to lie about accomplishments. A person who is estranged from entire family is a huge 🚩
|by Anonymous||reply 43||October 17, 2021 5:11 PM|
[quote]A person who is estranged from entire family is a huge
I disagree with this because many gays are disowned.
|by Anonymous||reply 44||October 17, 2021 5:13 PM|
Not due to homophobia r44
|by Anonymous||reply 45||October 17, 2021 5:15 PM|
Asks you to respect their pronouns.
|by Anonymous||reply 46||October 17, 2021 5:18 PM|
What about coworkers who constantly talk about themselves and the “upper-management” they’re “friends” with?
|by Anonymous||reply 47||October 17, 2021 5:19 PM|
They donate a kidney and then have the audacity to invite their much more talented and famous writer friends to join their private facebook group about it. How pathetic and nuts can you get!
|by Anonymous||reply 48||October 17, 2021 5:19 PM|
Externalizing blame is a major indicator of certain personality disorders. People who do this are best avoided even if they don't meet the diagnostic threshold for a personality disorder because they tend to be abusive and nothing is ever their fault.
|by Anonymous||reply 49||October 17, 2021 5:23 PM|
Befriend anyone with BPD, wait about one month, then try counting how many times they've asked 'How are you doing?"
|by Anonymous||reply 50||October 17, 2021 5:34 PM|
They enjoy nothing more than asking people to diagnose other people’s psychiatric problems.
|by Anonymous||reply 51||October 17, 2021 5:40 PM|
They don't relate - they infiltrate. They'd had an agenda before they ever said hello. They like everything you like, but not really. The big tell - they share details of some childhood or later trauma to a) invoke feelings of sympathy in you and b) to get you to open up about your personal life as well. All the while, they're building a mental dossier on you because in the end they want control over the association or "friendship". Alas, there are those among us who simply cannot be fooled by such stealthily administered attacks, and it most certainly is an attack!
|by Anonymous||reply 52||October 17, 2021 5:42 PM|
I was raised around this kind of thing and am pretty good at detecting it.
Whatever you do, don't let them know that you know. They'll come for you like the real killer does after Jessica in the final act of many Murder, She Wrotes.
|by Anonymous||reply 53||October 17, 2021 5:47 PM|
R49, I know someone like this. She’s pretty mendacious.
|by Anonymous||reply 54||October 17, 2021 6:08 PM|
When you call your sister and several friends and they all say, "Guess who I heard from."
|by Anonymous||reply 55||October 17, 2021 6:16 PM|
Lovebombing is a huge red flag. Normal people don't smother you with approval and attention straight off: That's how cults work.
I read a really good book on sociopathy, and they said one of the biggest signs of sociopathy is a pattern of lying interspersed with begging for sympathy.
|by Anonymous||reply 56||October 17, 2021 6:17 PM|
They react angrily to any criticism, and view any such comments as personal attacks. Any future interactions with people like this after their perceived slights will be pointless.
|by Anonymous||reply 57||October 17, 2021 6:56 PM|
If they have a white collar career (as opposed to artistic or shift work), a pattern of constantly switching jobs every few months, and always because people at the old job were conspiring against them.
|by Anonymous||reply 58||October 17, 2021 7:00 PM|
Social boundary pushing - not just not picking up on subtle social clues, but running through them. If they’re texting you heavily, so you start waiting to reply and not replying as much, they will just keep escalating (texting more and more often, calling to ask why you didn’t reply, and then showing up in person) instead of taking the hint.
|by Anonymous||reply 59||October 17, 2021 7:02 PM|
They boil your bunny.
|by Anonymous||reply 60||October 17, 2021 7:05 PM|
R36. That's not what I meant, but thanks. 'Speaks to' ≠ 'friends with.'
Also: Business Insider is a nope.
|by Anonymous||reply 61||October 17, 2021 8:13 PM|
If they went through childhood abandonment.
|by Anonymous||reply 62||October 17, 2021 8:24 PM|
R41 the last straw was when he showed up at my parents house to visit them. My father didn't know him from Adam and told him to go away and closed the door on his face. I tore into him at work the next day. He eventuality got the hint and left us alone. Not sure what his issue was; mental or emotional.
|by Anonymous||reply 63||October 17, 2021 9:22 PM|
Has a wife and kid and a housekeeper who all died under "mysterious circumstances"
|by Anonymous||reply 64||October 17, 2021 9:24 PM|
I think it's actually the other way around OP
|by Anonymous||reply 65||October 17, 2021 9:26 PM|
R32, it sounds like you have the problem. That’s common friend behavior and something I would deem normal.
|by Anonymous||reply 66||October 17, 2021 9:29 PM|
You DL'ers better not be claiming I have a personality disorder. I own a gun!! FUCK YOU ALL!!!
|by Anonymous||reply 67||October 17, 2021 9:38 PM|
R49 is my cuntastic mother, and R52 is my (thankfully) former sister-in-law. I believe the non-technical term is "bat-shit crazy."
|by Anonymous||reply 68||October 17, 2021 9:45 PM|
[quote]When you meet someone for the first time, either a new neighbor or co-worker at a new job, and they immediately start bad mouthing other people.
I think that depends on how you define "personality disorder"; I have a co-worker who recently did this very thing, but I think it's more about immaturity, stupidity and the warped idea that this somehow makes him seem important (by putting down others). Actually, it gave me w worse opinion of my supervisor who did nothing to stop it & just sort of tuned it out because I'm sure she'd heard it a 100 times before.
Again, I wouldn't define this as a personality disorder, but someone who immediately tells you all sorts of personal stuff: dramas, health issues, etc. likely has some significant emotional issues that you show slowly, but carefully back away from
|by Anonymous||reply 69||October 17, 2021 9:51 PM|
The internet has some weird math. Everyone knows someone with a personality disorder, but no one has a personality disorder themselves.
|by Anonymous||reply 70||October 17, 2021 9:54 PM|
I think women will do that thing where they start shit-talking others immediately because they sometimes think it builds a bond and they're trying to make a friend out of you. In their eyes, divulging a secret and creating a unity together is a gesture of friendship. I think it's psycho, though. This is just an explanation, I think. I've wondered why people do it, too.
|by Anonymous||reply 71||October 17, 2021 9:56 PM|
I used to work in the mental health field and had experience with a variety of the Axis II disorders. The one thing that typified all of them is that the patients seemed to have more energy than the rest of the people in the room put together. Their attempts to get needs met through manipulation were unrelenting and exhausting. I worked at a residential short term treatment facility, two weeks max, with up to six patients. I was just out of college with little life experience. By the end of a shift, my jaw would be clenched from the stress, particularly if there were multiple Axis IIs in the house at once.
One of my friends had Robert Spitzer as his therapist. Spitzer was the head of the committee that put together the DSM III-R. Spitzer said that part of the clinical lore is that if a you find yourself becoming angry with a patient, s/he might have a PD.
|by Anonymous||reply 72||October 17, 2021 10:09 PM|
When you, the psychiatrist, are told that "no other doctor has helped me like you have" and so on.
In a few weeks, months or a few years, this patient will turn on you, accuse you of trying to kill them and try to sue you. Pathognomonic for Borderline PD.
Another variation is the occasional message I get on my office vm: " I need a new psychiatrist. No psychiatrist has ever been able to help me". I just delete such messages, as I am unlikely to be of help where so many else have failed.
|by Anonymous||reply 73||October 17, 2021 10:33 PM|
[quote] A female.
Fixed that for you, OP.
|by Anonymous||reply 74||October 17, 2021 10:54 PM|
A certain female former news anchor who writes a book throwing everyone under the bus, only to have it reveal the her true personality.
|by Anonymous||reply 75||October 17, 2021 11:01 PM|
Nah, Katie lacks the fragility and fear of rejection that is always present in borderlines.
She is a mix of antisocial and narcissistic PD.
|by Anonymous||reply 76||October 17, 2021 11:35 PM|
🤡 Dyes their hair orange and buys out the entire stock of Coppertone QT Self Tanning Lotion on eBay and Amazon.
|by Anonymous||reply 77||October 17, 2021 11:45 PM|
So vhat I haff no gurlfriends, OP ?
Yoo culling me crayzee beetch ?
|by Anonymous||reply 78||October 17, 2021 11:54 PM|
R77 Just because he buys it, doesn’t mean he’ll actually pay the bill. Rather he’d drag it through court until they say fuck you.
|by Anonymous||reply 79||October 18, 2021 12:07 AM|
They work as a Realtor
|by Anonymous||reply 80||October 18, 2021 12:10 AM|
They see everything in black and white, someone is either the greatest person alive, or the worst person ever. There is never any in between. If they deem you the worst person ever, they will do everything in their power to make your life miserable so it is best to steer clear because something very innocuous can make them turn on you.
|by Anonymous||reply 81||October 18, 2021 12:16 AM|
"I. Don't. Like. DRAAAAAA-MMMMMAA-AAAAA!"
|by Anonymous||reply 82||October 18, 2021 12:31 AM|
R82 So tired! TIRED OF ALL THIS DRAMA! 😫
|by Anonymous||reply 83||October 18, 2021 12:33 AM|
Inappropriate oversharing (ex/telling you they were molested) during initial interactions.
|by Anonymous||reply 84||October 18, 2021 12:40 AM|
[quote] They see everything in black and white, someone is either the greatest person alive, or the worst person ever. There is never any in between. If they deem you the worst person ever, they will do everything in their power to make your life miserable so it is best to steer clear because something very innocuous can make them turn on you.
This is actually the best indicator I've yet found.
People in the psychotherapy profession call this mental behavior "splitting," and in my experience it almost always correlates with Cluster-B types.
|by Anonymous||reply 85||October 18, 2021 12:47 AM|
Tattooing the name of their significant other on themselves
|by Anonymous||reply 86||October 18, 2021 12:52 AM|
[quote] Tattooing the name of their significant other on themselves
|by Anonymous||reply 87||October 18, 2021 1:00 AM|
R72 Were these mostly cluster B types?
|by Anonymous||reply 88||October 18, 2021 1:06 AM|
What PD do 80% of attorneys have? Is it called Asshole Personality Disorder?
|by Anonymous||reply 89||October 18, 2021 1:32 AM|
R81, borderlines, narcissists and aspergers.
|by Anonymous||reply 90||October 18, 2021 1:58 AM|
R57, narcissists and Aspies
|by Anonymous||reply 91||October 18, 2021 1:59 AM|
R82 I've long learned to stay away from people who feel the need to announce how "laid back" they are, or how "they're not into drama."
R87 IIRC, Johnny altered the tattoo to say "Wino forever."
He also got a crappy pinup tat of his ex Amber Turd as well as her nickname, Slim, tattooed on his knuckles. He altered the "Slim" tattoo to say "Scum" but IDK what he did with the pinup tattoo.
|by Anonymous||reply 92||October 18, 2021 2:05 AM|
Depp Is a borderline satanist
|by Anonymous||reply 93||October 18, 2021 2:07 AM|
Amber Heard was no "Slim". What a fuckin poseur.
|by Anonymous||reply 94||October 18, 2021 2:10 AM|
I tend to notice 'something' around their eyes. I hate to sound so homespun but there it is.
|by Anonymous||reply 95||October 18, 2021 2:24 AM|
What do you notice.
|by Anonymous||reply 96||October 18, 2021 2:26 AM|
Eyes speak volumes . There’s usually an intensity in stare with a hostile look.
|by Anonymous||reply 97||October 18, 2021 2:28 AM|
R96, it's like a luminescent quality. Almost attractive, but I'd compare it to foxfire or marsh lights. Something that can lead you to your doom.
Glittery, too bright, too intense. I wish I could be more exact.
|by Anonymous||reply 98||October 18, 2021 2:32 AM|
If you bitches can't handle me at my worst then you certainly don't deserve me at my best!
|by Anonymous||reply 99||October 18, 2021 2:35 AM|
In my experience people with serious personality disorders don't blink - especially when they are first tring to figure out if they can manipulate you. You (as potential target) will also get the feeling they are trying to read you.
|by Anonymous||reply 100||October 18, 2021 2:51 AM|
A lot of borderlines and narcissists will tell you they are bipolar . It’s a get out of jail Card .
|by Anonymous||reply 101||October 18, 2021 2:59 AM|
Shit, I recognize lot of the above in myself!
|by Anonymous||reply 102||October 18, 2021 3:08 AM|
R98/R95 imo it’s also possible to tell when someone lacks empathy, is deeply and intrinsically depressed beyond all hope of recovery, or has sustained extensive soul damage, just from looking at their eyes.
There’s a dead, dull ‘flatness’, there; opposite to your engaging profile of a BPD. Idk how to describe it better, but I know it when I see it—maybe because my dad has it (mean phobic Aspie who was a victim of child abuse/neglect and fostered out).
|by Anonymous||reply 103||October 18, 2021 11:05 AM|
Person, woman, man, camera, TV.
|by Anonymous||reply 104||October 18, 2021 11:19 AM|
R94, haha I'm glad I'm not the only one who took exception!
|by Anonymous||reply 105||October 18, 2021 12:56 PM|
Christ, I'm never befriending anyone ever again!
|by Anonymous||reply 106||October 18, 2021 1:03 PM|
They ask overly personal, invasive questions upon initial meeting. When given a general answer, they double down and persist with their questions wanting details, they don't back off as any normal personal would do. They act like police detectives.
|by Anonymous||reply 107||October 18, 2021 1:24 PM|
They breathe in and out.
|by Anonymous||reply 108||October 18, 2021 1:26 PM|
R50 - why is "How are you doing?" a problem? My bipolar ex messages once a week and that's his usual greeting via messenger. It's usually followed by a link to an article of mutual interest, some pics, etc. If he says "Hi J, hope you are ok", I know it will be followed by a request for advice. It's rarely anything other than mundane things like a recommendation for a good barber in some neighborhood, a good brand of iron skillets, etc. I can tell he's a bit manic when my answer to a link he sends is followed by a whole editorial on the subject and several comments.
|by Anonymous||reply 109||October 18, 2021 1:50 PM|
Being in a long term relationship with a psychopath is usually a sign that the person is a sociopath lite. Despite the lifetime movie stereotype of the innocent and befuddled partner, like tends to attract like. Note that I say " tends to". There are undoubtedly exceptions to the rule . Noticing this pattern is one of the reasons I could never get behind the silly Free Melana BS.
|by Anonymous||reply 110||October 18, 2021 2:25 PM|
When someone doesn't respect boundaries, that's my red flag.
|by Anonymous||reply 111||October 18, 2021 3:05 PM|
When someone bullies children or bickers with them as if they are the child’s peer. Gets their ego very tied up in how the child “treats” them.
I don’t know which personality disorder this behavior corresponds to. Probably narcissism. But I’ve known 3 or 4 people in my life this applies to and they’ve all turned out to be big time bunny boilers.
|by Anonymous||reply 112||October 18, 2021 3:16 PM|
R110, wasn’t there some study that showed narcissistic females tend to end up with sociopathic males?
|by Anonymous||reply 113||October 18, 2021 3:17 PM|
R113 I hadn't heard of that study but based on what I've seen anecdotally I can definitely believe it.
|by Anonymous||reply 114||October 18, 2021 3:20 PM|
R24 I know a woman like that. She regularly posts pics of someone else's baby on FB and Instagram and doesn't tag the parents. She's literally stealing the baby's pics for attention and "likes". This woman is also an emergency room addict. (As well as a drug addict and alcoholic). Every 3 months or so, the has an "accident" and has to have surgery, be in a cast of some kind, etc. She posts multiple pictures and updates of herself in the hospital, close-ups of her cast and injury. She has Munchausen, but not by proxy. She also posted several videos and shots of herself crying when her dog died recently. Very Chrissy Teigen.
|by Anonymous||reply 115||October 18, 2021 3:23 PM|
Almost attractive, but I'd compare it to foxfire or marsh lights. Something that can lead you to your doom.
M A R Y !
|by Anonymous||reply 116||October 18, 2021 4:36 PM|
Sounds a lot like a true crime novel I read, R115.
|by Anonymous||reply 117||October 18, 2021 4:37 PM|
R103 That is one of the reasons I have long believed that bpd is fundamentally a disorder of aggression rather than just a trauma response. A lot of people who are severely abused or damaged become completely lifeless behind the eyes and worn out but BPDs never lose that spark in their eyes and seem to have , as another poster commented upthread, almost boundless energy. BPDs sure love to talk about how damaged they are but they don't seem completely destroyed and passive in the way that someone who has a disorder like Cptsd has.
|by Anonymous||reply 118||October 18, 2021 5:32 PM|
r115, that is factitious disorder.
|by Anonymous||reply 119||October 18, 2021 6:10 PM|
They use mirroring to follow and copy your body movements and mannerisms. They agree with everything you say, even when talking about someone they've never met, "Oh yeah, Eddie is a nice guy. Has a big heart." They never seem to be at ease and in some cases are constantly looking around as if they expect to be attacked at any moment; they're always on guard.
|by Anonymous||reply 120||October 18, 2021 6:11 PM|
Gays who hate women.
|by Anonymous||reply 121||October 18, 2021 6:13 PM|
Newsflash: Everyone has a personality flaw. Everyone is affected. NPD, BPD, Antisocial disorder, Bipolar, ADHD, OCD, Sociopathy, etc etc. Look in the mirror, you will find something.
|by Anonymous||reply 122||October 18, 2021 6:26 PM|
R112, yes. I am in a not speaking to my mother cycle because of this. Around three or four weeks ago I was taking my young teen daughter and her friend out to dinner. We were near where my mom lives and I called her to see if she wanted to come with us. She was actively saying mean things to the friend throughout dinner. (I told her to stop.) My mom doesn't drink but it was almost like she was drunk or something. She's nuts but this was really nuts. I haven't spoken to her since and don't know what to do.
|by Anonymous||reply 123||October 18, 2021 6:30 PM|
Am I needed here?
|by Anonymous||reply 124||October 18, 2021 6:58 PM|
[quote] They use mirroring to follow and copy your body movements and mannerisms. They agree with everything you say, even when talking about someone they've never met.
Mind blown. This behaviour has always unsettled me, but I didn’t realise it was red flag. I had put it down to my avoidant behaviours and my aggressive loner streak not wanting people style-riding me.
My mid-80s aged grandmother does this all the time. I’m her live-in carer right now, and she is constantly copying the things I say and tries to inject things I’ve shown even only passing interest in to every conversation. It comes off as very NOTES ON A SCANDAL tbh. There are days I feel like flipping out and screaming at her, “get a life! Get a personality! Who the fuck even are you?” (of course I would never, though)
She also asks very intrusive random personal questions out of nowhere, does not understand personal space (she keeps pinching my side in passing, poking at food I make, touching my clothes on the line), makes relentlessly negative and critical comments on everything (and not in the W&W riffing fashion), passes the buck for anything she says or does that frustrates, delegates household tasks in an unfair micromanaging way, and pretends not to hear what you say and makes you repeat it several times (we’ve checked her hearing, she’s fine).
Finally, she has what almost looks like a split personality. It’s creepy; sometimes she acts like an infantile girl with a whispercoo voice and helpless mewling around (she’s even said “I can’t do (x) because I’m likkle” before—my skin crawled fam), or conversely she acts like a total dragon with a deep no-nonsense tone ordering people around and haughtily making digs at others for not living up to her impossible standards. She will cry-bully at a hatdrop, if bossiness and bitching doesn’t get her her own way.
Whatever the fuck is wrong with her (and I’m interested to know), it’s infuriating.
|by Anonymous||reply 125||October 18, 2021 7:27 PM|
[quote] Newsflash: Everyone has a personality flaw. Everyone is affected. NPD, BPD, Antisocial disorder, Bipolar, ADHD, OCD, Sociopathy, etc etc. Look in the mirror, you will find something.
I think it's much worse in some of you people than in the rest of us, Ms. Dunham.
|by Anonymous||reply 126||October 18, 2021 7:27 PM|
Is ADD/ADHD a personality flaw?
|by Anonymous||reply 127||October 18, 2021 7:28 PM|
Complete inability to apologize.
Claps or hops while talking.
|by Anonymous||reply 128||October 18, 2021 7:40 PM|
Just turn on any real housewives show and pick one. Any one. They’re all a mess.
|by Anonymous||reply 129||October 18, 2021 7:40 PM|
I'm at my wits' end, R125, having exhausted every effort to get you out of my basement. You are a freeloader, not my caregiver; move already, I need the space and my privacy back.
No wonder your parents went into Witness Protection!
|by Anonymous||reply 130||October 18, 2021 8:22 PM|
R125, that sounds like senility more than anything.
My father is a sociopath. He was a very overtly hateful / abusive person until he met a woman he wanted to glom on to. He managed to keep his true self hidden for years.
But now that he’s getting older, he’s back to blurting out the abusive shit we all remember from 40 years ago. I think they lose their ability to keep their mask in place as they get older.
|by Anonymous||reply 131||October 18, 2021 8:46 PM|
My cousin is a raging narcissist. Back when she was to marry her husband 20 years ago, he told those who tried to warn him that they were being "unfair" to Patty. He later told those folks: "You were right I was wrong!" I've told the story before that my cousin has no middle name, but because of her propensity for litigation, her brother refers to her as Patty Sue.
|by Anonymous||reply 132||October 18, 2021 10:05 PM|
Is an attorney
|by Anonymous||reply 133||October 18, 2021 10:40 PM|
my relative is bipolar but i suspect a personality disorder as well. She's been in and out of psych hospitals for years. Doesn't work or know how to drive and blames being irresponsible on her disorder. It's definitely been a rollercoaster. There is always a crisis.
|by Anonymous||reply 134||October 19, 2021 12:42 AM|
R134 I don’t drive and I don’t work a full-time job. But I’m a depressed autistic (can’t inagine having the energy of a BPD/NPD/socio!), and don’t try to hide it or make excuses about it.
It’s a daily battle, but I try my best to contribute socially and show up for other people, even just to do errands or be a listening ear. And I make a point to be frugal and fair in all dealings.
Still, I’m aware that I’m “failing” by the common social metric, but that’s not so painful with the understanding that the metric is really a constricting inhumane framework.
Not that your BPD relly isn’t nuts and not that you’re wrong to call that out. Just saying everyone has a different story.
|by Anonymous||reply 135||October 19, 2021 1:39 AM|
Claps or hops while talking.
are they kangaroos?
|by Anonymous||reply 136||October 19, 2021 1:55 AM|
I relate, R130, after my lazy ass brother-in-law's six-month stint in our home, I was a lunatic, too. Getting that shiftless fucker out of the house for a few hours was a herculean task.
Family squatters will bring out the worst in anyone.
|by Anonymous||reply 137||October 19, 2021 1:58 AM|
Believing every immature and annoying person has a personality disorder.
|by Anonymous||reply 138||October 19, 2021 2:01 AM|
R134 I did not mean to imply that other people that don't work or drive are "failures". I don't believe that at all. My relative just uses any excuse in the book to not have to be a responsible adult. I guess i should have been more specific. It sounds like you are a good person. My relative does not care about anyone. I'm not saying this to be mean or put her down. I love her as family and it's been very difficult dealing with her illness.
|by Anonymous||reply 139||October 19, 2021 2:06 AM|
My father is either a BPD or NPD, it is always someone else's fault, he has a dozen lawsuits going (he signs contracts and then decides he doesn't like the person, he calls the judges out for being a woman or a liberal because they never find in his favor), he is full of hate for so many people, the few he likes he won't ever see their faults. One odd thing is that he is going deaf and has cataracts but refuses to acknowledge he has a problem, he is definitely going blind and it is scary as he drives everywhere. He has tons of energy and is an extremely exhausting person, he is full of rage and this seems to fuel his energy. I've accepted I will die before him, as his rage is like a superpower giving him boundless energy.
|by Anonymous||reply 140||October 19, 2021 2:07 AM|
Maybe if you would get a job so you could buy your own drugs and keep your mitts off Granny's, she'd stabilize, R125.
It's unsettling when a loser moves himself into your home indefinitely.
|by Anonymous||reply 141||October 19, 2021 2:08 AM|
[quote]are they kangaroos?
No, they're just mentally ill / crazy.
|by Anonymous||reply 142||October 19, 2021 2:08 AM|
R107, borderlines do that . You say oh I live in M Manhattan, they will ask specifically where. If you are even more evasive , they will subtly turn hostile
|by Anonymous||reply 143||October 19, 2021 2:11 AM|
Having some sort of Crazy Hair, Make-up, or Body-Art, to the point that others note how Bizarre and off-putting it is, yet the bearer is absolutely unaware of how tasteless and tacky they look. See: our former Oompa Loompa President, Crazy Purple-Haired female Evangelist on Religion Channel, and Bad toupee man himself, The Pillow-Guy. Whether or not these individual's can be pigeon-holed into one Personality Disorder or not, I cannot say, but one thing is for sure- the Light is on but NOBODY is at Home!
|by Anonymous||reply 144||October 19, 2021 2:16 AM|
[quote]Newsflash: Everyone has a personality flaw. Everyone is affected. NPD, BPD, Antisocial disorder, Bipolar, ADHD, OCD, Sociopathy, etc etc. Look in the mirror, you will find something.
Personality disorders are much more than flaws. Consider yourself lucky that you've never crossed paths with someone who has a true disorder.
|by Anonymous||reply 145||October 19, 2021 3:28 AM|
R22 is in the wrong place
|by Anonymous||reply 146||October 19, 2021 4:35 AM|
R145, that’s a borderline you were responding to.
|by Anonymous||reply 147||October 19, 2021 4:59 AM|
Don't lump people with nervous disorders (OCD, anxiety, etc.) with people who have psychotic disorders.
The former, while exhausting, is relatively harmless; the latter is--not.
|by Anonymous||reply 148||October 19, 2021 6:11 AM|
Exactly! But narcs and borderlines are notorious for projection and deflection . It’s never their fault
|by Anonymous||reply 149||October 19, 2021 6:13 AM|
R97 and R98 are right. My sister is a classic borderline, and she has those crazy flashy eyes.
|by Anonymous||reply 150||October 19, 2021 7:50 AM|
R137/R141 are way off-base. I have a job (just not full time or enough to pay extortionate rent), and I buy my own medication (never used recreational drugs) as well as groceries, necessities, cellphone bills etc. I don’t take a damn penny from my grandmother, unless you think I should be paying her share of water bills as well as mine, when her pension is bigger than my pay check. I have only been temporarily installed in her house to take care of her, because I misfortunately fell on hard times (sudden illness that got me unfairly thrown out of school+COVID layoff) at the same time my parents/toxic family lost a lot of money and *had* to relocate. It’s a case of wrong place, wrong time for me, and getting exploited by fucking nasty relatives.
But thanks for the understanding.
|by Anonymous||reply 151||October 19, 2021 12:37 PM|
Sounds like NPD, R140.
|by Anonymous||reply 152||October 19, 2021 12:50 PM|
Is a #FreeBritney supporter
|by Anonymous||reply 153||October 19, 2021 4:26 PM|
Narcissists can’t feel real joy or empathy. They are dark inside. Envy and rage is what they feel. They loathe to see others happy. Evil people.
|by Anonymous||reply 154||October 19, 2021 4:57 PM|
Which celebrities have those 'too bright and intense' BPD eyes mentioned upthread? Would you say porn bottom Dillon Roman is a good example? He's a good-looking guy, but his eyes seriously scare me. We had a thread about him where a lot of posters called him dead-eyed, but I think he's actually the opposite.
|by Anonymous||reply 155||October 19, 2021 5:27 PM|
[quote]Which celebrities have those 'too bright and intense' BPD eyes mentioned upthread?
Amy Coney Barrett
|by Anonymous||reply 156||October 19, 2021 5:36 PM|
Elizabeth Holmes has those freakishly bright eyes but I think she's a psychopath rather than a BPD.
|by Anonymous||reply 157||October 19, 2021 5:38 PM|
R22 Yes - can relate to what happened to you. People walk away from depression because they dont understand how it affects people. I lost many friends then.
|by Anonymous||reply 158||October 19, 2021 5:41 PM|
|by Anonymous||reply 159||October 19, 2021 5:42 PM|
Constantly talking, regardless of the fact that others are busy and not listening. Talking to no one at all, then saying, WELL! as if you were supposed to care. Leaving electronics on loud, at all times. Make most calls a Face Time because that's what THEY want, not caring it's invasive to others. Expecting others to know all the random people in their life on a first name basis although you have no idea who these people are.
|by Anonymous||reply 160||October 19, 2021 5:43 PM|
MSNBC's skanky-assed Leigh Ann Caldwell has "the look," too, R155. Trade her to Fox already!
|by Anonymous||reply 161||October 19, 2021 5:51 PM|
The still use social media.
|by Anonymous||reply 162||October 19, 2021 5:52 PM|
[quote] Expecting others to know all the random people in their life on a first name basis although you have no idea who these people are.
My little sister does this. She also thinks the other person is any disagreement is always wrong and not as intelligent as her.
Beyond that though she’s a pretty decent person. I put her slight self-centredness down to arrogance and the good fortune of always getting her way more than PD.
|by Anonymous||reply 163||October 19, 2021 6:46 PM|
Amy Coney Barrett is perfectly poised, calm and "perfect".
She is not borderline, she has antisocial personality. She has no empathy for many of the most vulnerable in American society. And she is able to deflect criticism of her positions because of...religion.
|by Anonymous||reply 164||October 19, 2021 7:32 PM|
Winona Ryder is another example of "crazy eyes".
The weird thing is, she didn't always have them. That makes me believe it's probably just coke and not a personality disorder.
Besides the crazy eyes, she's aging incredibly well.
|by Anonymous||reply 165||October 19, 2021 10:16 PM|
|by Anonymous||reply 166||October 19, 2021 10:17 PM|
Living their ENTIRE life on social media. Ugly, desperate-looking plastic surgery.
|by Anonymous||reply 167||October 19, 2021 10:18 PM|
Talking ad nauseum about their constant health problems. Jesus PETE.
|by Anonymous||reply 168||October 19, 2021 10:22 PM|
R143, that's not borderline thing, though, that's straight-up NYC what's-the-bottom-line behavior. It's all about money, status and where you are in the hierarchy. People make assumptions about your income based on what neighborhood you live in.
|by Anonymous||reply 169||October 19, 2021 10:34 PM|
R36 This is my ex-boyfriend.
He was on / off with a girl for 4 years, then we met and he spent our friendship / relationship pulling the victim card about how abusive she was. She always tried reaching out to him after her relationships shit the bed and he always got upset she was still bothering him.
But last year he finally caved in and went behind my back. He told me she reached out to him, he showed me her message from Facebook, this was May 2020. Then around June, he said he went over her house as a friend and said he was turned off at her life and couldn’t wait to get out of there. Then in July / August he was finally telling her he needed to move on.
Then in November I started noticing things and grew suspicious. I went OUT of my fucking head and he was gaslighting me. I finally got confirmation in February this year that he was seeing her and I ended things despite him saying he did nothing wrong.
I kept track of things online, the same way I did before - Facebook, Spotify, IG and they ended things a month later in March / April.
Now they’re both seeing other people but I think they’re still friends.
The thing is - they both hate each other and treat each other like shit, that’s why they can’t be together for long so they date other people until the other people get sick of them and run away and they come back to each other as backup.
I told him, you should stay with her and spare other people from getting hurt. Same for her. But they can’t even do that. Just totally incapable mentally ill fucks.
He’s cheated on every relationship he’s ever had with this girl. And the girl he’s with now will meet the same fate.
|by Anonymous||reply 170||October 19, 2021 10:36 PM|
R170 you will all clown me for saying this but I can’t help pointing it out—what you’ve described is probably a Plutonian relationship (Venus/Mars/Moon-Pluto with some Saturn mixed in, if I had to guess).
That is an addictive destructive toxic cyclical bond, perfectly encapsulated by the Plutonian archetype. The kind of relationship that burns your selfhood to the ground and remakes you as something new (and not always or often good).
Chiron relationships are less unhealthy. They hurt more, and they don’t usually last or repeat themselves, but once you come through it you grow and learn from it, and you preserve your sense of self within it.
|by Anonymous||reply 171||October 19, 2021 11:56 PM|
Posts like R171 area a clear sign.
|by Anonymous||reply 172||October 20, 2021 1:30 AM|
|by Anonymous||reply 173||October 20, 2021 1:49 AM|
R172 look I was raised by a Crystals Frau, it’s formative automatic shit, give me a break
|by Anonymous||reply 174||October 20, 2021 1:50 AM|
If you actually believe that shit R171 / R174, you have proven my point.
|by Anonymous||reply 175||October 20, 2021 1:51 AM|
R172 another golden example in this thread is R22's long, boring, meandering, self-centered post.
|by Anonymous||reply 176||October 20, 2021 2:00 AM|
I couldn't even get through that R22 post, R176! TL;DR
|by Anonymous||reply 177||October 20, 2021 2:02 AM|
No sense of humour or ability to laugh at one's self. Also laughing at other's expense or misfortune.
|by Anonymous||reply 178||October 20, 2021 3:38 AM|
|by Anonymous||reply 179||October 20, 2021 4:01 AM|
[quote] Which celebrities have those 'too bright and intense' BPD eyes mentioned upthread?
|by Anonymous||reply 180||October 20, 2021 4:15 AM|
[quote] No sense of humour or ability to laugh at one's self
Nothing's wrong with that! Some of us just live incredibly important and serious lives the entire world depends upon!
|by Anonymous||reply 181||October 20, 2021 4:17 AM|
Ann is a sociopath
|by Anonymous||reply 182||October 20, 2021 4:20 AM|
I told my partner that I think his mother is a narcissist last week, and he got angry with me. She grilled me about my parent’s divorce within 15 minutes of meeting her. She also asked about my previous relationships upon our first meeting. She constantly talks about how fat and ugly she has been her entire life, fishing for compliments (she will brag about modeling 20 minutes later). She rents a condo in our city for 4 months out of the year, and stops by without calling even though I have asked her not to. On one of her visits, she decided to do our laundry and washed our dry clean only basket in hot water ruining everything. When I got angry, she asked if I was bothered by her appearance. It was absolutely bizarre. She has absolutely no boundaries, and when I complain she says that I am the problem because I’m not as close to my mother as my partner is with her. Despite all of this, my partner thinks she is a saint and her issues are just because she cares and wants to be close to ‘us’. I’m going to lose it.
|by Anonymous||reply 183||October 20, 2021 5:01 AM|
My mom and stepfather compete in a series of weight loss challenges for couples.
I find it really weird and reminiscent on They Shoot Horses, Don't They?
She also shares her email and social media with said stepfather. And my dad does does the same with my stepmother.
Very odd and for that reason, I keep pretty distant from them.
|by Anonymous||reply 184||October 20, 2021 5:08 AM|
People who constantly have a revolving door of people in their life - the ones who are out due to some perceived slight, typically followed by a new best friend to take their place. Rinse and repeat. I guess this is “splitting.”
|by Anonymous||reply 185||October 20, 2021 5:20 AM|
Borderlines are the scariest
|by Anonymous||reply 186||October 20, 2021 5:59 AM|
In R180's pic Ann Coulter looks like she might have a thyroid problem.
|by Anonymous||reply 187||October 20, 2021 6:19 AM|
Over ingratiating. Asks for your number almost immediately or social media page .
|by Anonymous||reply 188||October 20, 2021 6:52 AM|
A former friend with BPD was always giving me orders and instructions on how to behave or what to say. I told him to cut it out and he was flabbergasted I had an opinion about it. I was supposed to just obey!
|by Anonymous||reply 189||October 20, 2021 6:58 AM|
R183 And this isn't a red flag about your partner? How long do you expect this relationship to last? His mother is a saint and you will never be. Get out.
|by Anonymous||reply 190||October 20, 2021 7:07 AM|
I think Winona had a bad eye job, giving her a permanently startled look.
|by Anonymous||reply 191||October 20, 2021 7:38 PM|
R5 perfectly described the bitch that lives next door to me. Die, phony! Or at least move away.
|by Anonymous||reply 192||October 20, 2021 8:14 PM|
They tell you really personal things that you don't want to know after you first meet.
I began a new job and a woman in my department told me, after I had been there just three weeks, that she thought she was pregnant. She had previously told me she was married for 12 years, no kids. We were standing in line at a soup and salad bar when she gave me the pregnancy news. I congratulated her, saying something to the effect of how happy they must be.
No, she languidly replied, she'd probably abort. this would be her fourth abortion, her husband didn't want kids. She said she would be out for a few days the next week with the flu as an excuse, and would I please keep her secret. "He likes to jump my bones," she said. I am absolutely pro choice but this really shocked me.
I did not want to know this and I didn't want to keep her secrets. It was nuts of her to tell me, I hardly even knew her. If her husband didn't want kids then the asshole should have had a vasectomy. Turned out both she and her husbands were monumental assholes. Selfish, narcissistic, angry, controlling, and strange. They thought they were hot shit, too, living in Pacific Heights in SF in a rented apartment. She was no end of crazy. She's dead now, died at 64, I saw her obituary and it was weird. Something to the affect of "self-sacrificing to a fault" obviously penned by her selfish pompous ass husband, who would call several times a day so they could discuss what she would be preparing for dinner.
|by Anonymous||reply 193||October 20, 2021 11:18 PM|
R183, lose the boyfriend. This won't end well.
|by Anonymous||reply 194||October 20, 2021 11:37 PM|
Borderlines are the most frightening
|by Anonymous||reply 195||October 20, 2021 11:50 PM|
R32 is Frieda Claxton
“I live alone cause I like it”!
|by Anonymous||reply 196||October 21, 2021 12:22 AM|
They can’t stop smelling their fingers.
|by Anonymous||reply 197||October 21, 2021 12:40 AM|
They have a creepy stare
|by Anonymous||reply 198||October 21, 2021 12:58 AM|
You want creepy staring personality disorder eyes? Bradley Cooper wins the category!
He gives me the creeps, like there's a dozen bodies buried in his basement. Sadly, Hollywood has mistaken his creep factor for charisma.
|by Anonymous||reply 199||October 21, 2021 1:12 AM|
You're a United States Senator and you think this is appropriate attire to wear to the Capitol.
|by Anonymous||reply 200||October 21, 2021 1:26 AM|
Fits of intense rage interspersed with bouts of laughter
Being able to stay awake for days on end without the help of drugs
Regressing to childlike behavior or baby-talk to manipulate or get attention
|by Anonymous||reply 201||October 21, 2021 2:33 AM|
Bipolars are just soul sucking
|by Anonymous||reply 202||October 21, 2021 2:40 AM|
The wig thing really disturbing.
|by Anonymous||reply 203||October 21, 2021 2:53 AM|
|by Anonymous||reply 204||October 21, 2021 2:54 AM|
"... sometimes she acts like an infantile girl with a whispercoo voice and helpless mewling around (she’s even said “I can’t do (x) because I’m likkle” before—my skin crawled fam), or conversely she acts like a total dragon with a deep no-nonsense tone ordering people around and haughtily making digs at others for not living up to her impossible standards..."
Oh God, I had a male co-worker like this! He was very strange around women, he'd either act like a little boy and expect to be mothered, or he'd be domineering and condescending and expect all the women around to switch gears and become deferential - even his female bosses. He'd even assume a John Wayne voice! After he left the job and moved away, I heard his young wife died under "mysterious circumstances", and even though most of the people at that office had pretended to like him, they all got the chills and thought the worst when they heard that. If you're dealing with a normal person your first reaction is sympathy, but with him... everyone's mind immediately made a very dark assumption.
At the time, I thought he was weird because of his background, he was an only son who'd been home-schooled by a religious mother, and had carried the attitudes of a spoiled little boy into adult life. But that was before the "mysterious" death...
|by Anonymous||reply 205||October 21, 2021 3:01 AM|
|by Anonymous||reply 206||October 21, 2021 3:03 AM|
People who go on and on and on about their own point of view. Avoid. It doen't get better.
|by Anonymous||reply 207||October 21, 2021 3:15 AM|
I didn't know anything about personality disorders until i read this thread, it has explained a lot about people I know and have worked with though. The things you learn on datalounge.
|by Anonymous||reply 208||October 21, 2021 6:04 AM|
I disagree Aspergers is a personality disorder, although behavior can manifest like one. The aspies who are very high-functioning and just want to blend in and be accepted as normal-functioning people may miss a cue now and then and stare at you a second too long or say something off or rude, or go on and on and on about their topic of interest. We can cut them some slack, but it's hard to do for me. I'm socially impatient and have trouble conversing with just about everyone for over five minutes.
|by Anonymous||reply 209||October 21, 2021 7:37 AM|
Not flushing after shitting
|by Anonymous||reply 210||October 21, 2021 7:50 AM|
. I'm socially impatient and have trouble conversing with just about everyone for over five minutes.
Sounds like it's you who has the problem then
|by Anonymous||reply 211||October 21, 2021 8:16 AM|
R211 I just blocked you for being boring.
|by Anonymous||reply 212||October 21, 2021 10:27 AM|
Wow, R193, that is quite a story; I recently had a co-worker at a new job give me his speech about how the vaccine was the mark of the beast, end of times, etc. etc and I thought *that* shit was weird to say to a complete stranger, but you win!
|by Anonymous||reply 213||October 21, 2021 12:20 PM|
You come home from your college waiter job to find your ex has not only broken into your house and fled, but has smashed the snow globe collection you’ve been assembling for your entire young gay life (because you told yourself as a child ‘all sophisticated men collect things’)- *including* the limited edition I Love Lucy globe your SAINTED MOTHER gave you!
Shows up to your apartment drunk and calls you a “peasant.”
Boasts about his H&K that “the government” gave him.
Goes on emergency Lamictal.
Conversely, you can’t stop fucking him because you still believe he’s you’re “intellectual soulmate.”
|by Anonymous||reply 214||October 21, 2021 12:54 PM|
r214 you sure it's not you with the personality disorder?
|by Anonymous||reply 215||October 21, 2021 2:15 PM|
|by Anonymous||reply 216||October 21, 2021 2:20 PM|
[quote]We can cut them some slack, but it's hard to do for me. I'm socially impatient and have trouble conversing with just about everyone for over five minutes.
Are you saying it's hard for you to cut Aspies some slack because of your own antisocial tendencies?
|by Anonymous||reply 217||October 21, 2021 2:36 PM|
|by Anonymous||reply 218||October 21, 2021 2:38 PM|
|by Anonymous||reply 219||October 21, 2021 2:38 PM|
1. Lack of empathy for people with Asperger's.
2. Difficulty conversing with others for more than 5 minutes.
3. Lack of self-awareness.
|by Anonymous||reply 220||October 21, 2021 2:40 PM|
Among BPDs I have noticed a pattern. They have a large entourage of attack dogs/ enablers who blame everyone around the bpd case for their problems. The BPDs parents, colleagues and partners are all monsters victimising the pure of heart bpd. Whenever the BPDs issues come up the enablers scream about the people around them, while the borderline is somehow childlike and lacking in any responsibility for their actions. I've seen dynamic repeatedly in physically attractive women who have BPD.
|by Anonymous||reply 221||October 21, 2021 2:47 PM|
[quote] A female who doesn't have any female friends.
Or her husband/bf may have isolated her.
|by Anonymous||reply 222||October 21, 2021 2:51 PM|
First time i met a new neighbour she told me she had no friends and didn't need any and that everyone she worked with was a fuckwit.....i stayed clear of her
|by Anonymous||reply 223||October 21, 2021 2:55 PM|
Italian American from Long Island.
|by Anonymous||reply 224||October 21, 2021 3:20 PM|
Aspies can be very unhinged and devious . They’re pretty sneaky .
|by Anonymous||reply 225||October 21, 2021 3:30 PM|
R224 Ralph Macchio hurt you?
|by Anonymous||reply 226||October 21, 2021 3:50 PM|
Being overtly judgmental of others
|by Anonymous||reply 227||October 21, 2021 3:56 PM|
|by Anonymous||reply 228||October 21, 2021 3:57 PM|
In my narcissistic boss’s office I counted eleven framed pictures of him. To be fair, they are pictures of my boss and someone else or my boss as part of a group, but I suspect it’s not the others’ faces he’s interested in admiring.
|by Anonymous||reply 229||October 21, 2021 4:33 PM|
You can’t shake them: don’t answer a text and they will call. Don’t answer a call and they’ll keep calling. Boundaries mean nothing to them.
|by Anonymous||reply 230||October 21, 2021 4:59 PM|
The last employer I had—the insane robbing professional-victim grifter I’ve spoken of on here before—would call me on my personal mobile phone at midnight to discuss inconsequential matters of stock/housekeeping or to give yet another laughable flimsy and transparent excuse as to why my pay would be late. If I didn’t pick up, she would leave multiple rambling weepy or shouty messages.
Throughout my short tenure, I repeatedly and firmly stated that this was not appropriate and she ought to stop—this did not sink in.
Even after I left, she would spam my phone with tearful begging or nasty rants...until I narced and sicced the proper authorities on the woman. Haven’t heard a peep since.
|by Anonymous||reply 231||October 21, 2021 5:14 PM|
I've read a few stories through the years about how Madonna would do just what R230 and R231 described to people she was working with. She'd call and text in the early morning with notes about a project they were working on together.
|by Anonymous||reply 232||October 21, 2021 5:21 PM|
R221, we call those people “flying monkeys”.
R232, Meghan Markle also did that to staffers when she was still in England.
|by Anonymous||reply 233||October 21, 2021 5:27 PM|
When you feel like you’re being swept off your feet.
|by Anonymous||reply 234||October 21, 2021 5:29 PM|
[quote] I used to work in the mental health field and had experience with a variety of the Axis II disorders. The one thing that typified all of them is that the patients seemed to have more energy than the rest of the people in the room put together.
That's something I've noticed in the cases where the teacher has an affair with the student. Most of the teachers and students texted each other and called each other hundreds or even thousands of times. How the hell do they hold down a teaching job, their family, their spouse and have time for an affair where they spend prolific amounts of time communicating with their student? Some of them text more than 700 times a month
I've always said, "how do they have the energy to do this"?
|by Anonymous||reply 235||October 21, 2021 5:41 PM|
Staying up for days at a time with crazed energy and intense moods/mood swings are signs of several serious mental disorders, R235.
|by Anonymous||reply 236||October 21, 2021 5:59 PM|
I’m general, I’m wary of people with too many irons in the fire. And they always take on more. I have a family member who is like this. It’s like she has to prove she’s superwoman who “has it all”. And then she takes on MORE projects like starting a foundation for her disabled kid and redecorating their second home and training for a 10k and so on. I guess they’re adrenaline junkies? They seem to enjoy the “how does she do it?!” attention.
Not quite a personality disorder, but maybe a “disordered trait”? Also had a serious eating disorder in HS.
|by Anonymous||reply 237||October 21, 2021 6:04 PM|
[quote] had a serious eating disorder in HS
Attended a girls-only school throughout my entire teen years, so I know dozens of girls who suffered with this badly.
Almost every one of them is now either super-religious, alcoholic/addicted to something, or working in military/law enforcement. Think that says it all.
|by Anonymous||reply 238||October 21, 2021 7:21 PM|
R236 that sounds like a drug-addled meth binge
|by Anonymous||reply 239||October 21, 2021 7:56 PM|
R222 that makes no sense. A guy who's controlling and possessive enough to isolate his wife or gf would be more likely to keep her from making male friends, not female ones.
|by Anonymous||reply 240||October 21, 2021 8:08 PM|
I am friends with a number of women from grad school. They are now stuck in suburban shitholes for various reasons (work, family.) Many complain they don’t have “local” girl friends because the locals are all fat sows with 4-5 kids who have never worked a day in their lives. So I can well imagine a certain type of woman has few female friends.
|by Anonymous||reply 241||October 21, 2021 9:13 PM|
R241 your friends are all bitches.
|by Anonymous||reply 242||October 21, 2021 9:17 PM|
They’re educated bitches with graduate degrees.
|by Anonymous||reply 243||October 21, 2021 9:20 PM|
Yes. Everyone knows blue collar sows can’t possibly be bitches who ostracize the “different” one.
|by Anonymous||reply 244||October 21, 2021 9:27 PM|
[quote] R222 that makes no sense. A guy who's controlling and possessive enough to isolate his wife or gf would be more likely to keep her from making male friends, not female ones
It makes perfect sense. With a controlling jealous asshole, it's an absolute given that the woman is not to have a male friend.
They also don't want their wives/girlfriends to have friends that are women. Women friends would tell them, "your husband is crazy, normal people don't live this way"
They want the wife to be as helpless as possible. They don't want to let the women have anyone to help them escape. They also cut them off from family members
This is one of the top 3 forms of abuse/control. How do you not know this?
|by Anonymous||reply 245||October 21, 2021 9:46 PM|
I don’t care if your friends are undergraduates, graduates or grade school dropouts. They sound like BITCHES!!
|by Anonymous||reply 246||October 21, 2021 9:51 PM|
Well, I haven’t described them so what are you basing that on, r246?
Maybe lay off the meth pipe for a while.
|by Anonymous||reply 247||October 21, 2021 9:53 PM|
I am coherent and sober as a judge. You’re obviously in denial or are bitch too.
|by Anonymous||reply 248||October 21, 2021 10:00 PM|
R242 is correct.
R241 and friends sound like snobby elitist bitches. I've known people who fit the white trash stereotype but are still nice people. I have no problem being friends with anyone of any background so long as they're decent people.
|by Anonymous||reply 249||October 21, 2021 11:00 PM|
Sometimes people do have a personality disorder but most often people just have poor social skills. Or is this the same thing? Anyway, I try be tolerant of people who are just trying to have a connection with another human but don’t have the skills to do it. It depends on the situation though, if you don’t have a buffer it’s difficult to be nice after a while.
|by Anonymous||reply 250||October 21, 2021 11:25 PM|
Well, there's having no local female friends when you hate where you live, and then there's never having had any female friends, because you see all other women as competition or just disdain women. One is an expression of hating your life, the other of a major personality flaw or disorder.
There was a brief moment when I got involved in the Angelina Jolie fans-vs-haters wars*, before I chucked it all because that was a short road to crazy town. Anyway, Jolie has always seemed to be a good bet for genuine BPD, and one of the tells was her total lack of female friends, and her delight in taking men away from other women. That was then, now it's keeping the custody battles going until the children are grown.
|by Anonymous||reply 251||October 21, 2021 11:30 PM|
What's the male equivalent of a woman who has no female friends?
|by Anonymous||reply 252||October 21, 2021 11:32 PM|
|by Anonymous||reply 253||October 22, 2021 12:24 AM|
Can’t the women lawyers and engineers make friends with other professional supremely-educated women? They’re not as rare and special as they think, and there are clubs and professional associations where they can meet other special people. I live in a city, but know plenty of suburban overachievers and they always have other friends of their ilk. They join country clubs and if they have kids, there are other moms at their private schools.
|by Anonymous||reply 254||October 22, 2021 2:35 AM|
It is so hard to be a suburban woman with a graduate degree. 😔
|by Anonymous||reply 255||October 22, 2021 11:28 PM|
They believe in Jewish space lasers.
|by Anonymous||reply 256||October 22, 2021 11:47 PM|
[quote]Anyway, Jolie has always seemed to be a good bet for genuine BPD, and one of the tells was her total lack of female friends, and her delight in taking men away from other women.
How terrible that no one bothered to report Jolie to the police for abducting an adult male. Poor Brad never stood a chance against such practiced villainy.
|by Anonymous||reply 257||October 22, 2021 11:51 PM|
The subtlety of a knife pushed all the way in can make for an unmistakable sign of a personality disorder.
Hey, Mia! How many suicides and escapees in the bunch so far?
|by Anonymous||reply 258||October 23, 2021 1:50 AM|
*points at the church*
|by Anonymous||reply 259||October 23, 2021 4:02 AM|
Anyone who believes in ghosts or psychics.
|by Anonymous||reply 260||October 23, 2021 4:28 AM|
Do people still join country clubs? What exactly goes on in them? Aren't they a 20th Century thing?
|by Anonymous||reply 261||October 23, 2021 4:34 AM|
In my early 40s I started a new job. There was a guy in my circle of coworkers who no one seemed to want to work with or like. I stupidly felt sorry for him and tried to include him in things. I learned the hard way that after a certain age if a person isn't well liked there is probably many good reasons as to why. 1.5 years later I took him into a conference room and ripped into him and told him to stay the fuck away from me and that I would never work with him or have anything to do with him again. After that he started breaking into my house.
|by Anonymous||reply 262||October 23, 2021 4:45 AM|
262, and what happened during those 1.5 years?
|by Anonymous||reply 263||October 23, 2021 4:48 AM|
"Do people still join country clubs? What exactly goes on in them?"
Golf, tennis, gyms, keeping the riff-raff out.
You don't hear about them much any more, but I suspect that's because fewer people have enough disposable income to join.
|by Anonymous||reply 264||October 23, 2021 5:26 AM|
R262 Don't leave us hanging!
|by Anonymous||reply 265||October 23, 2021 6:00 AM|
R254 is 110 years old.
|by Anonymous||reply 266||October 23, 2021 6:31 AM|
Gossips about or bullies their own relations on social media or to strangers. Hates animals. Cannot operate without being a malicious gossip and living from catastrophe to catastrophe. Deep seeded need to make others others feel inferior.
|by Anonymous||reply 267||October 23, 2021 6:53 AM|
R183, you are spot on. That one crazy bitch and she won't get better. I would move.
|by Anonymous||reply 268||October 23, 2021 6:55 AM|
You're right. Well, I wouldn't say it's a personality disorder tell, but it's definitely a sign of being an asshole.
|by Anonymous||reply 269||October 23, 2021 8:45 AM|
Pretends to be Spanish....
|by Anonymous||reply 270||October 23, 2021 10:05 AM|
^LOL. She must be going insane now that Alec is getting all the attention. Even though it's due to a tragedy.
|by Anonymous||reply 271||October 23, 2021 10:12 AM|
R262! Are you okay? Is he in the house right now?
|by Anonymous||reply 272||October 23, 2021 11:46 AM|
Asking personal questions about your family members.
|by Anonymous||reply 273||October 23, 2021 12:47 PM|
They lie about inconsequential things.
|by Anonymous||reply 274||October 23, 2021 12:50 PM|
All the stories about people glomming on to people they hardly know reminds me of a kid I grew up with that did this. He couldn't keep a friend though. He lived with his single dad and his dad was later arrested for molesting girls. The girls were all from family's the son squirmed his way into.
|by Anonymous||reply 275||October 23, 2021 12:52 PM|
R262 Aaaannd? Then what happened?
|by Anonymous||reply 276||October 23, 2021 1:22 PM|
Yes, people still belong to country/beach clubs. I live in Manhattan and know lots of people who belong to various types of clubs. Regular people, not just socialites, too. If you have a family, it’s great. The whole family spends the day in the fresh air, dad plays golf, mom sits by the pool or plays tennis, the kids run around and swim or fish in the lake, nobody has to cook. There may or may not be action in the steam room.
|by Anonymous||reply 277||October 23, 2021 1:47 PM|
Including a link to your CashApp or Venmo account in your social media bios
|by Anonymous||reply 278||October 23, 2021 1:53 PM|
Biting nails into adulthood.
|by Anonymous||reply 279||October 23, 2021 2:04 PM|
The people in my area who still join country clubs are a very small group, overwhelmingly white and conservative, 99% married with kids, and many do so with the financial help of their parents, even though they are in their 30s or 40s with white-collar careers. It’s not really a crowd I enjoy being around, even though the clubs themselves are lovely: clubhouses, great pool, tennis courts, etc.
My parents were pushing me to join during the last year of my eligibility for the “member’s child” rate: even at 50% off, it was a flat fee of $50K and something like $300 per month membership fee, plus the cost of food/drinks and activity charges. This is near a major city and an old/stuckup club, so it may be cheaper in other areas or for clubs with a different ethos.
|by Anonymous||reply 280||October 23, 2021 2:16 PM|
They see mirror hours.
|by Anonymous||reply 281||October 23, 2021 2:25 PM|
A frau take on “women without female friends” —
I agree it is usually a sign of something going wrong with the woman in question. They tend to fall in three buckets:
- Women who buy into the societal message that men are superior to women (sometimes through the prism of “men are cool and women suck,” but sometimes more unconscious than that), so that they put all their energy into relationships with men (friendship or romantic) and don’t make any effort with other women. This is the type who says “I’m just a guy’s girl, I don’t get other women” or “other women don’t like me.”
- Women who see other women as competition. This isn’t just women who are anxious about keeping a male partner, but also women who measure their success in life against what other women are doing, so that being friends with them means always hearing one-upping comments and never any vulnerability or realness. This type will have superficial women friends/frenemies they keep around to compete with, but they will all be more recent friends who then vanish and get replaced. This type will say “Other women are always jealous of me.”
- As noted above, women who are in abusive/bad relationships and get isolated. They don’t have female friends or ANY friends. It’s complicated because often this type participates in her own isolation by pushing away female friends who are concerned and tell her her boyfriend is bad news, sometimes cutting them off explicitly for being honest, and other times doing a slow fade because she stops sharing any information, knowing it will make her bf look bad. One of my friends is in this position now and I’m just trying to hang on.
|by Anonymous||reply 282||October 23, 2021 2:27 PM|
They think rescue dogs are more important than children.
|by Anonymous||reply 283||October 23, 2021 2:27 PM|
Keeping erratic waking/sleeping hours, especially if they contact other people in the middle of the night.
|by Anonymous||reply 284||October 23, 2021 2:39 PM|
R281 what does that mean?
|by Anonymous||reply 285||October 23, 2021 5:28 PM|
R240 has never met a narcissist in her life.
|by Anonymous||reply 286||October 23, 2021 6:56 PM|
What is the deal with people who answer a text with a phone call, then leave you on the phone for an hour talking about nothing? It drives me insane. I am about ready to give up on a 15 year relationship because of it. I don’t have the time or energy to sit on the phone talking about this person”s problems PLUS the problems of her other friends and family members.
|by Anonymous||reply 287||October 23, 2021 7:10 PM|
They are sometimey to the max. Like you one day and hate you the next.
|by Anonymous||reply 288||October 23, 2021 7:12 PM|
R287 is this generational? My elder relatives and coworkers have always got angry that I don’t respond with enthusiasm or energy to phone calls (or try to avoid them). No-one my age (late 20s) or younger likes to make or receive calls over texts. Even when I was a little kid and no one had mobile phones and IM in their pockets, I still hated using landlines.
|by Anonymous||reply 289||October 23, 2021 7:14 PM|
R262 what the fuck, Did you call the cops? Did you catch him in the act? What was he doing in there, sniffing your underwear or something? How old were you at the time? How old was he?
|by Anonymous||reply 290||October 23, 2021 7:29 PM|
R262, please give us a sign.
|by Anonymous||reply 291||October 23, 2021 7:43 PM|
R267 the "hate animals" thing needs more attention.
It's one thing to be indifferent to animals, but I've literally never met someone who actively disliked animals who wasn't a gross piece of shit.
|by Anonymous||reply 292||October 23, 2021 7:59 PM|
R292 what about specific animals? Like my dad, who adores dogs and horses and certain prey animals such as deer, but can’t abide domestic cats or rabbits or any birds (he’s a former game hunter who likes to shoot small prey).
|by Anonymous||reply 293||October 23, 2021 8:14 PM|
Rabbits are disgusting. They are definitely not a domesticated animal. They shit all over the place and are only good for the pot.
|by Anonymous||reply 294||October 23, 2021 8:27 PM|
|by Anonymous||reply 295||October 23, 2021 8:28 PM|
I’ve noticed that a lot of people from small farm towns think nothing of abandoning animals. My mom used this as an excuse for her friend dumping her dog (owned for 8 years) off at the humane society because it started peeing in the house. This woman had zero remorse. When I volunteered at a shelter, we would always get dogs that were dumped off on the side of the road in rural areas.
|by Anonymous||reply 296||October 23, 2021 8:34 PM|
R1 Beat me to it. LOL. So fucking true.
|by Anonymous||reply 297||October 23, 2021 8:35 PM|
If they have kids, and they are split from the other parent, and they badmouth the other parent to the kid. Usually with long sad tales of victimization designed to make the kid feel like their other parent is a monster.
|by Anonymous||reply 298||October 23, 2021 8:37 PM|
R298 This happened to me as a kid and my parents never split. Now when I look back I see how fucked up it is.
|by Anonymous||reply 299||October 23, 2021 8:54 PM|
I think that is 90% of divorced parents, r298 (especially when child support and custody battles are present).
|by Anonymous||reply 300||October 23, 2021 8:55 PM|
Constantly trashing an ex is messed up. They're not a part of you your life anymore, move the fuck on.
If it's a co-parenting situation and they are trashing them in front of the kids, they're only hurting the children. It's childish and abusive.
|by Anonymous||reply 301||October 23, 2021 9:01 PM|
R301 thinks she's a fucking GOD. Because she says it, it will be so! Cunt.
|by Anonymous||reply 302||October 23, 2021 9:20 PM|
your name is Alec Baldwin
|by Anonymous||reply 303||October 23, 2021 9:26 PM|
They mistake their pet's reliance on them for food as affection.
|by Anonymous||reply 304||October 23, 2021 9:31 PM|
Has changed their name
|by Anonymous||reply 305||October 23, 2021 9:36 PM|
R305 depends on context and the reason imo.
Like I’m beginning the process of changing my middle-names then using them as a main name, as a way to distance myself from poisonous family members after whom I was named. And also because my middle names are that of an archaic celebrity/folk hero who is now viewed as campy and silly—not a vibe I want to present in my working life, and the person not someone I relate to/connect to/want to emulate to in any way.
Maybe that still looks or sounds sketchy to others, but idc, I know I need to do it for my own peace of mind living an independent life.
|by Anonymous||reply 306||October 23, 2021 10:07 PM|
[quote] people from small farm towns think nothing of abandoning animals
Because we’re used to seeing dead ones all over the place.
|by Anonymous||reply 307||October 23, 2021 10:08 PM|
R306 "Roy" isn't that bad of a middle name actually.
|by Anonymous||reply 308||October 23, 2021 10:22 PM|
Oh Jeez, R5, I went out with someone just like that. I was so charmed by him, but I had a nagging feeling that something was off. I ignored that feeling for a while because he was a lot of fun, until I started to catch him in white lies. At first, I confronted him about it, but he always had what seemed to be a reasonable explanation. It's hard to believe, I know, but one time, during one of those discussions, his face changed and his eyes got black. It was only for a brief moment, but it scared me. It was scary and exhausting, so we're no longer together.
|by Anonymous||reply 309||October 23, 2021 10:29 PM|
"I’ve noticed that a lot of people from small farm towns think nothing of abandoning animals."
The rural poor can't afford to be as sentimental about animals as a bunch of old queens. Farm people will occasionally bond with an animal, but most of the animals around a farm or in rural towns are there to generate a profit, and the majority of the animal profit is generated by caging animals for byproducts or slaughtering them for meat. The rural poor live close to the edge financially, too close for sentiment. If a cow is sick the decision about whether to give it vet care or slaughter it is purely a financial one, if a chicken stops laying eggs it goes into the pot, if a working dog stops being any use and the owners can't afford vet bills, it's put down or taken to the shelter.
Of course the rural poor as as likely to have personality disorders as anyone, but this attitude towards animals can be more of a necessity than the sign of a personality disorder.
|by Anonymous||reply 310||October 23, 2021 10:44 PM|
|by Anonymous||reply 311||October 23, 2021 10:45 PM|
They still obsess about Trump and relate and/or compare everything to that fucker Trump. Sick.
|by Anonymous||reply 312||October 23, 2021 10:57 PM|
R292, meet DMX , the evil rapper
|by Anonymous||reply 313||October 23, 2021 11:31 PM|
Unfeeling cruelty to animals is often a sign of sociopathy and criminal tendencies. There’s scientific proof on that.
But the extreme opposite: obsessive, borderline obnoxious love of animals and animal rights (often vocally loud about it) can be just as bad in a different way. It’s like a God complex. This is often seen in people disassociated from reasonable adult reality, who can be resentful and vindictive of others (look through the sordid history and ranks of PETA for proof). Red flag: people who clog their social media feeds with gruesome pictures and videos of animals being tortured and tested on, with links to “help,” until their accounts are cancelled (and they’re proud of it). Crazy animal lovers can be the type to secretly do something harmful to someone they think deserves it, as revenge for something only they perceive.
It’s like two extreme opposite extreme ends of the spectrum.
|by Anonymous||reply 314||October 23, 2021 11:55 PM|
R314, I agree 💯. Most animal lovers are decent though . PETA makes no distinction between literally a roach 🪳 or a dog 🐶
|by Anonymous||reply 315||October 23, 2021 11:59 PM|
R296, it's common for suburban/city people to dump their pets out in the country. They rationalize that the farmers can always use another dog or cat. This drives the rural people crazy angry, as the see the poor suffering abandoned animals and almost never can afford to take them in.
I worked on a college campus that has this same problem with the students. They get a cat for their dorm room or rental and at the end of the school year they don't want to take it with them when they move out. So they dump them on campus, so for months the campus has a lot of frightened starving cats looking for food and shelter.
Another example of how millennials and GenZ are no better than boomers.
|by Anonymous||reply 316||October 24, 2021 3:18 AM|
The college town I used to live in wouldn't adopt out animals to students for exactly the reasons above.
|by Anonymous||reply 317||October 24, 2021 3:21 AM|
I grew up someplace incredibly rural (there was a pine tree farm behind the road where I grew up and a horse farm two roads away) and I was going to post what R316 said. My dad and I flat-out caught someone dumping a dog once when I was a kid. They drove a nice car and were clearly a city person.
People from nearby cities also treat rural areas like dumps and recreation areas. We had a real problem with kids from one city tearing up dirt roads on their four-wheelers. Their parents would just drop them off in our area to "play" and pick them up at the end of the day.
|by Anonymous||reply 318||October 24, 2021 12:02 PM|
Personality disorder...? Uh, those who love to troll and antagonize online, especially on a board like DL where they can be easily anonymous.
|by Anonymous||reply 319||October 24, 2021 1:29 PM|
They appear on reality TV shows.
|by Anonymous||reply 320||October 24, 2021 1:52 PM|
People estranged from siblings for petty reasons. I’ve had 2 coworkers and 2 bosses who fit this category. And they all shared the same traits. Drama, backdoor politics, ambitions beyond their capability and a complete lack of loyalty. They also never work well in a team.
|by Anonymous||reply 321||October 24, 2021 2:03 PM|
I'll add those who have multiple accounts on one site (sockpuppets).
|by Anonymous||reply 322||October 24, 2021 3:11 PM|
People who obsessively look at other people's posting history.
|by Anonymous||reply 323||October 24, 2021 3:17 PM|
Being woke for woke points.
|by Anonymous||reply 324||October 24, 2021 3:20 PM|
I always wonder about the people who completely overreact to others’ fairly mundane posts.
Someone will post some boring thing from their own lives, and some psycho comes along and responds “YOU’RE A LIAR! YOU’RE A BITCH!”
You just know they’re reacting to some movie they have playing nonstop in their heads.
I sometimes wonder if I’m becoming too cynical or pessimistic. Then I see one of these freaks venting their spleen and I think “nah, I’m good.”
|by Anonymous||reply 325||October 24, 2021 5:26 PM|
R325 yeah. That reminds me of the post where someone was discussing their opinion of the new I love Lucy film and multiple posters insisted that he hadn't seen the film and that he must be lying. I couldn't understand why, the post wasn't that far fetched.
|by Anonymous||reply 326||October 24, 2021 5:33 PM|
People who obsessively interject politics into every conversation, online or in person. This includes both Trumpers and Trump haters who somehow must feel empty now that Orange Hitler isn't in our face every second. I can guess why Trumptards are fixated -- they still can't get over the election -- but why do people that profess to hate the guy want to spend every waking moment ruminating about him? So many hollow people with no interests but watching cable news, I guess.
|by Anonymous||reply 327||October 24, 2021 7:30 PM|
Violent impulses. I knew an actual “antifa” guy for a while and he didn’t seem to actually care about ideology, it was very apparent that what was alluring to him was the idea of inflicting violence on someone he thought was wrong. With a few tweaks of background, he could have been one of the tiki torch idiots.
|by Anonymous||reply 328||October 24, 2021 7:38 PM|
"If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best."
|by Anonymous||reply 329||October 25, 2021 11:24 AM|
Estrangement from family is a huge red flag 🚩
|by Anonymous||reply 330||October 25, 2021 3:32 PM|
An obsession with Disney films.
|by Anonymous||reply 331||October 25, 2021 3:39 PM|
R331 yup. Knew a Disneyana bitch in College. Girl was crazycakes, but two-faced enough to think that everyone else was the issue.
In the short few years I knew her, she was cosplaying as California Katy Perry in public, running a Glee fanblog, and quasi-stalking one of her crushes (I didn’t stick around long enough to watch her graduate to full-blown stalking). She would also take anything she read in Vogue as gospel.
|by Anonymous||reply 332||October 25, 2021 3:49 PM|
An obsession with comic books: Star Wars
|by Anonymous||reply 333||October 25, 2021 3:59 PM|
R330 Estrangement from family is not always a huge red flag, especially with gay people. Often it can be the sign of strength, independence and integrity.
|by Anonymous||reply 334||October 25, 2021 4:02 PM|
Agree with the above R334. On the other side of the coin, slavish attachment to toxic, chaotic families and fucked-up parents can be a red flag.
|by Anonymous||reply 335||October 25, 2021 4:07 PM|
This is r262, the one who had the coworker breaking into my house. I went to the police and they told me to find a big boyfriend or buy a gun. We lived out in the country and the cops were useless, but at least they didn't give me a false sense of security.
We knew it was him because he used a key and kept leaving the door open to make sure I knew he had been in the house. One time I didn't feel well and my wife had to work late so he gave me a ride home. He told me he would wait and make sure I got in OK and he saw where we had a key hidden. He was the only one besides my wife and I who knew where it was.
One Friday we were almost to our house and we saw him speeding by us. When we got home the door was open. That's when I remembered he had seen where we hid the key. I checked and the key was gone.
After that he quit bothering me. He had a wife and step daughter so that probably helped as he didn't want his wife to know what he was up to. He left me alone at work because of the harassment policies, I think he had shit in his personnel file from causing problems with other women. I think he had narcissistic tendencies and I was feeding his ego, Slowly backing away from him didn't work, but telling him off and to stay the fuck away from me triggered his behavior.
This was probably 20 years ago. I retired 8 years ago. I don't even know if he is still alive.
I actually had a much worse problem with a professor in college who without a doubt is a psychopath. That's too long of a story to repeat here.
|by Anonymous||reply 336||October 25, 2021 4:17 PM|
"Speaks to none of their exes." have to disagree. Not talking to exes is healthy, not a personality disorder - as far as I'm concerned. It's weird to me if you're buddies with your exes. Move on.
|by Anonymous||reply 337||October 25, 2021 4:20 PM|
How is estrangement from family a red flag if it wasn’t your choice??
|by Anonymous||reply 338||October 25, 2021 4:23 PM|
R338 All the cliched psychology/self-help books always said two things about people's relationship patterns and how they will be in the present. 1. How they get along with their mother determines their life-long relationship patterns. 2. How they get along with their exes shows how they will relate to you in the present. I have always found those two rules to be accurate. As men, both gay and straight, we inevitably end up with a psychological clone of our mother. If your mother was a hugely horrible, psychotic, asshole then you will be as well.
|by Anonymous||reply 339||October 25, 2021 5:51 PM|
R338, I’m referring to someone who was the cause of a lot of drama and heartache to their family .
|by Anonymous||reply 340||October 25, 2021 5:57 PM|
R340, estrangement from family isn't necessarily a red flag. It can mean that you're a psycho who drives everyone away, even your own family, or it can mean that the family is toxic and abusive and the person had to get away to save their sanity, or it can mean that the family is conservative-toxic and the person is gay.
"Estrangement from family" will have to be removed from the official list of Red Flags.
|by Anonymous||reply 341||October 25, 2021 7:03 PM|
R341 is a wise woman. Considering how famously homophobic Evangelicals and Conservatives (and other religions) are, more than half of those unfortunate gays will be estranged from them. THAT is a good thing.
|by Anonymous||reply 342||October 25, 2021 8:20 PM|
It might seem like a bit of a reach, but .... erratically creating and deleting or abandoning social media accounts. Constantly changing the user handles of existing accounts. I'm not sure what exactly drives this kind of behavior, but I've seen it in people who are textbook cases of borderline personality disorder, as part of a general pattern of impulsivity and emotional instability.
I'm also wary of people who simultaneously post to multiple accounts on the same social network, unless of course one is a 'business' account and the other is used for private stuff. Reeks of narcissism imo.
|by Anonymous||reply 343||October 25, 2021 9:55 PM|
They favor words and terms such as Klan grannies, Boris, Trumpers, Nazis, racists, flyover stans . . .
|by Anonymous||reply 344||October 25, 2021 10:01 PM|
Yeah I have gone “no contact” with the matriarch of my family (an aunt, not my dearly departed mom). And because of that, several family members have cut me off. It is messy but Aunt is abusive, and my assorted relatives are deeply unpleasant..
I don’t want to be red flagged into the dreaded personality disordered bunch!
|by Anonymous||reply 345||October 25, 2021 10:38 PM|
R332 My sister had a psycho roommate in college. I looked her up once and learned that she left college after two years and moved to Florida to work at Disney World. Her whole life is Disney.
|by Anonymous||reply 346||October 25, 2021 11:36 PM|
R343, I change the handle of my tumblr account all the time. It's because I don't want anyone I know to find it somehow and check it all the time. I found out that multiple people were doing this and it's just creepy.
|by Anonymous||reply 347||October 26, 2021 1:44 AM|
R347, I know who you are and where you live.
|by Anonymous||reply 348||October 26, 2021 2:17 AM|
R347 I know who you are and I SAW WHAT YOU DID!
|by Anonymous||reply 349||October 26, 2021 2:22 AM|
They’re in the Edith Massey Facebook group.
|by Anonymous||reply 350||October 26, 2021 2:26 AM|
It get having a 'fake' social media account using a fantasy name and no profile pic (tbh I have a few myself for stalking purposes), but an account showing your real face, linked to people you know in real life, and using a slightly different variation of your real name or nickname every few months? Doesn't make sense to me.
|by Anonymous||reply 351||October 26, 2021 4:18 AM|
R343 Learn a new word other than "narcissism" stupid cunt. You have to say it a million times in EVERY fucking thread! Clearly you are schizoaffective or some type of super psychotic asshole.
|by Anonymous||reply 352||October 26, 2021 4:43 AM|
R343 Ive seen what you are talking about.
One extreme example is this person who kept switching “occupations” every 6 months to a year doing completely different jobs like from “tour guide” to “real estate boss” to “international food expert” like I swear it was 5 or 6 different handles and logos by the time I couldn’t take it anymore. It was so crazy. I think she did it all for the internet and none of it in real life.
|by Anonymous||reply 353||October 26, 2021 4:58 AM|
People who accuse others of being crazy (usually they are the ones who are fucking nuts!)
|by Anonymous||reply 354||October 26, 2021 5:05 AM|
If your mother was a hugely horrible, psychotic, asshole then you will be as well.
|by Anonymous||reply 355||October 26, 2021 5:47 AM|
R354 is a borderline
|by Anonymous||reply 356||October 26, 2021 5:50 AM|
R355 So clever, dinosaur.
|by Anonymous||reply 357||October 26, 2021 6:52 AM|
r354 see r70
|by Anonymous||reply 358||October 26, 2021 10:10 AM|
Claim that they are conservative,hate nudity on television, hate profane words, claim to hate debauchery BUT love to have sex more than 95% of liberals out there....
LOTS of creeps and sociopathic fuckers are like that.
|by Anonymous||reply 359||October 26, 2021 1:13 PM|
[quote](tbh I have a few myself for stalking purposes)
|by Anonymous||reply 360||October 26, 2021 2:27 PM|
R359 I've met lots of people who didn't curse and couldn't watch R-rated movies, but had no problem with action movies or The Walking Dead. They were all weirdos.
|by Anonymous||reply 361||October 26, 2021 3:00 PM|
Being a prolific poster on yelp . Particularly one who uses the first name of your server while posting bad reviews. " I asked Abigail to give me mac and cheese with bacon on the side but they were already mixed in. She apologised but it didn't seem sincere".
|by Anonymous||reply 362||October 26, 2021 3:22 PM|
The need to always be right.
|by Anonymous||reply 363||October 26, 2021 3:23 PM|
They love to point out the mistakes of others on DL!
|by Anonymous||reply 364||October 26, 2021 4:34 PM|
Clearly R352 has no idea what 'schizoaffective' or 'psychotic' even means. He/she/it just loves to throw around big words. But hey, as long as it isn't the dreaded over-used 'narcissism' ...!
|by Anonymous||reply 365||October 26, 2021 6:41 PM|
Inability to handle criticism.
|by Anonymous||reply 366||October 27, 2021 10:58 AM|
Never forgives even at the slightest slight
|by Anonymous||reply 367||October 27, 2021 12:30 PM|
Maybe that’s why Freud said the Irish can’t be helped in therapy, R367
|by Anonymous||reply 368||October 27, 2021 12:46 PM|
R365 Fuck off and die cunt. I hate you, the "narcissism" troll. Narcissism doesn't even exist.
|by Anonymous||reply 369||October 28, 2021 5:23 PM|
|by Anonymous||reply 370||October 28, 2021 5:45 PM|
r369 needs to smoke copious amounts of pot
|by Anonymous||reply 371||October 28, 2021 5:53 PM|
I use to be a public defender. We took many CLE classes about disorders. But for me four things always stand out when I met a client with a personality disorder:
1. The person makes a general, plainly false assumption and awaits your reaction.
2. The person is never completely focused on the conversation, may ever try to distract from it.
3. The person acts right away as if you were their best friend or their enemy. There are no grays.
4. And the person has an angle for everything that they believe is externally happening to them.
And I believe that many people who have disorders know it and can’t control themselves.
|by Anonymous||reply 372||October 28, 2021 6:15 PM|
I believe you R361, lots of people can't watch a gay kiss or a lesbian kiss on the tv, but go on youtube and find a video of a real murder happening and suddenly they don't have problem watching that.
Can't stand those people.
|by Anonymous||reply 373||October 28, 2021 9:04 PM|
R373, prudery isn't necessarily the sign of a personality disorder.
It's usually the sign of an asshole, but that isn't the same thing as a personality disorder.
|by Anonymous||reply 374||October 28, 2021 11:28 PM|
One thing I remember from a psychology book is a clinician's description of a person with Borderline Personality Disorder creating maximum chaos inside an inpatient psychiatric unit and then sitting back to enjoy the show, disavowing any responsibility for it. I've seen this dynamic happen outside of clinical contexts many times. People high in narcissistic traits can also do this, but it's more of a power move rather than a need to generate drama.
|by Anonymous||reply 375||October 29, 2021 12:40 AM|
Borderlines are the most Dangerous creatures on the planet . And aspergers are often mistaken for borderlines.
|by Anonymous||reply 376||October 29, 2021 1:09 AM|
R376, my mother used to do this. She also would pick a fight with someone and pick and pick and pick until they lost their cool. Then she’d sit back with a smile, satisfied. It was like a junkie looking for a fix. Or like the urgency of a full bladder and the relief of release.
I loved many things about her, but that was her worst trait and I was very low contact because of it.
|by Anonymous||reply 377||October 29, 2021 1:40 AM|
People who call celebrities and others they don’t know “a narc” (narcissist) - I see that more and more. It’s weird.
|by Anonymous||reply 378||October 29, 2021 1:56 AM|
Everything now has a pseudo-medical diagnosis, R378. People used to be evil or jerks. Now they have a personality disorder.
|by Anonymous||reply 379||October 29, 2021 2:01 AM|
OK. I've come to the right place. This friend of mine, a guy, met this girl at a 4th of July Party, They're both 25.. She was a lot of fun and really lively. He had been kind of down for a while because of shit that happened on his job. He stated dating her. Man, she moved on him like a freight train. With in one month she was practically camped out at his house, pawing though all his stuff like a 5 y old.
Then he goes to Vancouver to see family and friends he hasn't seen in over a year, and she's calling him a LOT. After she sees some pictures his sister posts on Instagram, of him and his friends partying and having fun, she has a temper tantum, and she's up all night with a crying jag, so after a month or so of peace at home with his fam, he agrees to let her come visit. She spends like 4 days in a hotel, and suddenly she is camped out at his parent's tiny house and she is like the flu, man. And the family are really nice, they try to make the best of it.
He is making the best of it too, getting laid a lot and when she gets her way, she's a lot of fun, although she lacks judgement and says and does things that are inappropriate, being infantile and obnoxious, throws the "F" bomb a lot and talks about suggestive, sexual situations at the dinner table, etc. and sort of giddy in a very manic way. She also talks about him to his friends and family as if they don't know him and she is an authority. Very overbearing. And she is overly familiar with his friends that she just met.
For context, here's what I found out about her from him and his sister : She suffered from an eating disorder about 6 yrs ago, and was in therapy. She has anxiety attacks, insomnia, crying jags, asthma, and takes three different pills for her "anxiety" and he "bad moods." She can be fucking exhausting because when she has one of her crying jags no one sleeps.
She wants to be part of every single activity he does. He cannot go out with his guy friends unless she tags along. He just got a new job, and he was excited about it except she calls him all the time and "surprised" him by going to his office for a surprise lunch date to celebrate. She is psycho, and I have a bad feeling about her, but he thinks she is "getting better" and she just needed TLC and he is helping her.... I think this is going to end badly.
Oh, and she is very very close to a girlfriend who travels a lot (airlines) and the girlfriend always tells Miss Psycho how beautiful she is and how much she loves her, but she seems to avoid her as much as possible. In fact she has about three close friends including the girl who works for the airlines, and the other two must be social rejects she met in therapy, but all they do is praise her and tell he she is beautiful, which she seems to require and they are two train wrecks. I have been in her presence three times and I have never seen anyone so self-involved. She never walks passed a mirror. And she is always looking for an excuse to take selfies. So is she Bi-Polar or is she a Narcissist or can you be both?
|by Anonymous||reply 380||October 29, 2021 3:13 AM|
R380 She sounds like a classic borderline. The mood swings and constant invasive need to insert themselves into others lives is a tell tale sign. The entourage of followers who feel compelled to shower her with compliments is also seen in a lot of BPD cases. These people DEMAND constant reassurance and often become vicious when they don't get it.
|by Anonymous||reply 381||October 29, 2021 3:18 AM|
My friend seems to always give in to her. He feels she just needs reassurance, and he appeases her. I worry about the guy. He fails to see that events in his life are her triggers. He has to go out of town? Boom, anxiety attack. Insomnia. Crying Jag. He has to start a new job that has a pretty long commute and unpredictable hours? Boom. Another one. He was supposed to go to a college football game with a few friends. He'd be gone overnight. Boom. Asthma attack. Sick in bed. I've know him since kindergarten, and he's a kind hearted peace loving, happy go lucky guy who loves his friends, and is very likeable. He's one of those guys who will pick up strays. His last shelter dog had three legs. Lately he looks tied all the time. Sunken eyes. He still smiles and makes the best of things, but I'm worried. What can I do to help him?
|by Anonymous||reply 382||October 29, 2021 4:12 AM|
R380, I’d say borderline, too. If he’s put up with it this long, he’s probably hooked on the sex and the drama.
|by Anonymous||reply 383||October 29, 2021 4:17 AM|
R382 there's nothing you can do. He has to want to leave. Maybe the relationship will eventually run its course.
|by Anonymous||reply 384||October 29, 2021 11:33 AM|
R377 I was part of an internet group centered around fanship of a TV show where someone did this to me constantly. She would pick a fight over something minor that I brought up. Then she would go on about how she "didn't have the time" to care about said thing. When she was the one who picked the fight! Looking back, I realize that she tried this a LOT, but because I hadn't realized it, I didn't take the bait most of the time.
Though she was a Democrat, she was also a Christian who was active in her church, so I think she had a problem with gays. I remember her cheering when Crash won the Best Picture Oscar over Brokeback Mountain, even though she hadn't seen either movie. She said, "I love my gay friends, but I don't think that kind of behavior should be encouraged."
|by Anonymous||reply 385||October 29, 2021 12:48 PM|
R380's friend, you in danguh, girl....
|by Anonymous||reply 386||October 29, 2021 5:15 PM|
R386...thanks a lot... that is exactly the image I don't need to see because that is my biggest fear. She recently told my friend she doesn't think I like her. He said it's because I never say anything nice to her. She tries to look her best, and I don't even notice.... It's laughable, except it seems like she would try to interfere with his friendships if she felt threatened by them.
|by Anonymous||reply 387||October 29, 2021 6:33 PM|
[quote]People who call celebrities and others they don’t know “a narc” (narcissist) - I see that more and more. It’s weird.
A narc is a snitch, slang for narcotics officer. People shortening words these days (season is now 'szn,' suspect/suspicious is now 'sus') smacks of stupidity and wanting to appear to be young, long after that party is over. Now they apparently aren't even doing it right.
[quote]One thing I remember from a psychology book is a clinician's description of a person with Borderline Personality Disorder creating maximum chaos inside an inpatient psychiatric unit and then sitting back to enjoy the show, disavowing any responsibility for it.
|by Anonymous||reply 388||October 29, 2021 6:52 PM|
r387 Are you in love with your friend? Otherwise you sound a bit too invested in his life.
|by Anonymous||reply 389||October 29, 2021 6:56 PM|
Nope, not in love, but he is like a brother to me, since forever. I came out to him, before I ever told anyone and he had a lot of chances to out me and he didn't. Him and his sister and I grew up together. So, yeah, maybe I do seem invested. But honestly being on an anonymous board talking about it has helped. I "love" you guys even the bitches. And this thread was the perfect place to put it out there. Honestly, I would have welcomed someone saying she's fine you're being anxious for nothing. But you are confirming my fears and the DL "diagnosis " of BPD is right on target. I've started researching it. I also want to educate myself so I don't contribute to making things worse.
|by Anonymous||reply 390||October 29, 2021 7:05 PM|
R390, this is classic Straight Drama. Obviously she’s a troubled, manipulative person, however you care to categorize her. But that’s not the issue. HE’S the problem. Why is he drawn to this woman? Why is he enabling her?
|by Anonymous||reply 391||October 29, 2021 7:50 PM|
[quote]Also laughing at other's expense or misfortune.
This immediately makes me think of Madonna, it's something I've always noticed about her.
|by Anonymous||reply 392||October 29, 2021 9:58 PM|
I was born with a priceless gift.. the ability to laugh at the misfortunes of others
|by Anonymous||reply 393||October 29, 2021 10:56 PM|
I wouldn't say it's priceless. I think a fair amount of it goes on. Especially among republicans.
|by Anonymous||reply 394||October 30, 2021 1:12 AM|
[quote]When you meet someone for the first time, either a new neighbor or co-worker at a new job, and they immediately start bad mouthing other people.
Also, when you meet someone for the first time and they immediately begin telling highly personal stories about their lives.
|by Anonymous||reply 395||October 30, 2021 1:18 AM|
you live in NYC
|by Anonymous||reply 396||October 30, 2021 1:20 AM|
People you've known for years who've never once apologized for anything, even a very small thing. Then you notice that they're never wrong about anything and are quietly completely above reproach at all times.
|by Anonymous||reply 397||October 30, 2021 3:04 AM|
R375 Fuck off, narcissism troll. I want to kick you in the ovaries with steel-toed boots.
|by Anonymous||reply 398||October 30, 2021 6:51 AM|
I am not the narcissism troll.
|by Anonymous||reply 399||October 30, 2021 6:54 AM|
Anyone who mentions "narcissism" is a troll.
|by Anonymous||reply 400||October 30, 2021 6:57 AM|
Raging NPD is very advantageous in some fields, such as acting and politics.
|by Anonymous||reply 401||October 30, 2021 7:05 AM|
Narcissists are among us most definitely, but the way people throw that word around these days is getting hilarious. If someone cuts them off in traffic, posts one too many selfies, or doesn't like their painting, they're suddenly a narcissist.
There are many different types.
The grandiose ones are the most classical ones who exhibit a "life is a party" vibe, but will never be there for you when things get bad or you wanna go deep. They're very surface-level, but not always unpleasant. They can be a good time in small does.
You have the coverts who are usually the ones who post mostly "woe is me" kind of posts on social media about how no one likes them, how sad they are, how no one ever understands their greatness, etc. These can be the most exhausting, because they're not even fun like the grandiose ones can be. Mostly, they just make you sad and are kinda pathetic.
The malignant ones are the ones you really need to watch out for. They're the most manipulative and really have zero empathy for anyone or anything. It seems like these are the most rare.
|by Anonymous||reply 402||October 30, 2021 9:40 PM|
These terms really are thrown around willy-nilly online by people who don't know what they are talking about, aren't they? Narcissism, gaslighting, borderline personality, bipolar...
|by Anonymous||reply 403||October 30, 2021 10:49 PM|
R403 sounds like an Axis II, Cluster B, narcissistic borderline autogynephile agoraphobic.
|by Anonymous||reply 404||October 31, 2021 12:59 AM|
Cold eyes are a hint
|by Anonymous||reply 405||October 31, 2021 1:47 AM|
Narcissism as a personality trait (or, as one poster called it earlier, a personality flaw) is much more common than Nacissistic Personality Disorder. Anyone can spot narcissism in another person. It’s really just a overly high sense of self worth, often going hand-in-hand with entitlement. But NPD is a cluster of personality traits including a deep underlying sense of insecurity and really needs a trained doctor or therapist to diagnose. Same with Borderline Personality Disorder.
Oh, and I think being estranged from one’s family, even if said family is toxic and that estrangement is a healthy move towards sanity, is still a warning that that person will have emotional problems and might not be good relationship material. Being raised in such a toxic atmosphere and carrying the burden of estrangement can weigh down the soul well into adulthood.
|by Anonymous||reply 406||October 31, 2021 4:03 AM|
Believes they are the other gender and chops off perfectly healthy body parts to feed the delusion.
|by Anonymous||reply 407||October 31, 2021 4:27 AM|
They watch and believe CNN.
|by Anonymous||reply 408||October 31, 2021 5:01 AM|
R404, you made me laugh so hard. Thank you :)
|by Anonymous||reply 409||October 31, 2021 8:20 AM|
Obsession with Halloween and spending more on Halloween decorations than they do on a college education.
|by Anonymous||reply 410||October 31, 2021 4:35 PM|
Add Independence Day to that list, r410. I have a middle class friend that spends $4-5k every year on FIREWORKS for her party. It makes me sick to think of literally burning that much money every year for a half hour show that no one really gives a shit about.
|by Anonymous||reply 411||October 31, 2021 4:55 PM|
And don't get me started on those Arbor Day fanatics!
|by Anonymous||reply 412||October 31, 2021 5:19 PM|
R402 Fuck off, narcissism troll. There is no such thing.
|by Anonymous||reply 413||October 31, 2021 10:11 PM|
R412 The Boxing Day and Guy Fawkes obsessives are even worse.
|by Anonymous||reply 414||October 31, 2021 10:58 PM|
Gawd, some of you have no understanding of the difference between being an asshole and a full-blown personality disorder.
Sharing odd enthusiasms aren't a sign of a personality disorder. Taking a bottle of pills, stalking someone, or ruining their career for failing to appreciate your 4th of July fireworks show is a sign of a personality disorder!
|by Anonymous||reply 415||October 31, 2021 11:41 PM|
Thank you, R415.
|by Anonymous||reply 416||October 31, 2021 11:56 PM|
I’m offended r415! I’m going to take a bottle of pills now. I hope you’re happy.
|by Anonymous||reply 417||November 1, 2021 12:56 AM|
I had a boyfriend who was BPD and would always threaten to take a bottle of pills and sometimes actually take all of his pills. I wonder now if my life would be less scarred had I just let him take the pills. Instead, I helped him get treatment repeatedly and then threw his ass in jail. He still wound up dead.
So yes, I do wonder if I should have just let him take the pills that he wanted to do badly.
|by Anonymous||reply 418||November 1, 2021 1:34 AM|
When people want to commit suicide let them. It's their decision. They know how miserable their life is you don't. If it leaves close friends and family members reeling they just have to deal with it and think of the pain that individual was going through.
|by Anonymous||reply 419||November 1, 2021 10:02 PM|
You can’t just do that if you’re a mandated reporter, R419. If there was an investigation and it was found out you had knowledge or were even there, you could kiss your entire career bye.
|by Anonymous||reply 420||November 1, 2021 10:24 PM|
R420, what's a "mandated reporter?"
|by Anonymous||reply 421||November 1, 2021 11:50 PM|
When they open their mouth at midnight and a small automated cuckoo bird pops out 12 times and finishes with an evil laugh.
|by Anonymous||reply 422||November 2, 2021 2:17 AM|
Also if they march very slowly toward you while wearing a shitty William Shatner mask, be careful.
|by Anonymous||reply 423||November 2, 2021 2:19 AM|
They can give it but they can't take it
|by Anonymous||reply 424||November 2, 2021 6:57 AM|
Again, R424, there's a difference between the signs of being an asshole and the signs of a full-blown personality disorder.
|by Anonymous||reply 425||November 2, 2021 8:31 AM|
Everyone in their sphere of influence is broken and demoralized. Their employees, spouse, children.
|by Anonymous||reply 426||November 2, 2021 12:30 PM|
They are morbidly obese.
|by Anonymous||reply 427||November 2, 2021 9:53 PM|
Possible R427 but that sounds more like depression.
|by Anonymous||reply 428||November 3, 2021 8:02 AM|
R428 - Definitely depression. And it can go much deeper.
|by Anonymous||reply 429||November 3, 2021 12:28 PM|
Obese people are the ones dying from Covid
|by Anonymous||reply 430||November 4, 2021 1:09 AM|
No, the unvaccinated are the ones dying from COVID, I'm involved with a network of ICUs and this is what I've seen for the last year. They are now of a great range of ages and weights, and from a lot of different backgrounds... with the largest segment being the rural poor. The ones who have been brainwashed by Faux News or who take their cues from their local ethnic communities, not the mainstream.
It's sad, but you have to let people make their choices.
|by Anonymous||reply 431||November 4, 2021 1:13 AM|
If you voted for Trump either time, you're crazy. But the crazy insurrectionists VOTE and the Dems don't always get out the vote. The future looks scary.
|by Anonymous||reply 432||November 16, 2021 10:48 AM|
I have to disagree with the assertion that a woman who has no woman friends has a personality disorder. My sister-in-law, one of the most together, loving, generous, and normal women I've ever known, chooses not to be anything other than acquaintances (on a need to interact basis, like for the kids) with other woman due to being stabbed in the back, lied about, bullied and betrayed by past women friends. She keeps all women at arm's length and won't get close to any. Women try, but no dice. She says she's never been happier aswqliving a drama-free life.
|by Anonymous||reply 433||November 16, 2021 11:45 AM|
A man who refers to a woman as 'a female,' OP.
|by Anonymous||reply 434||November 16, 2021 11:47 AM|
I'd be interested to hear more about the connection between personality disorders & people who have bad relationships with their mothers. It's one thing not to have close friends - a lot of adults don't - but I'm intrigued more by adults that develop intense relationships with people only to eventually fall out. That's behavior you expect from teens, not adults.
|by Anonymous||reply 435||November 16, 2021 12:23 PM|
My brother's girlfriend is like a virus. They've been dating for 3 months and she insists on meeting and sharing and hanging out with all his friends, is overly familiar with them, acting as if she's known them for years. She embarrasses herself all the damned time with inappropriate behavior. She's obnoxious and overbearing, and has taken over his life. She's like a gatekeeper. Oh, and she always puts him down. Teases him and does it in a joking way, but her humor depends on bullying people. I've noticed that even his closest friends have started avoiding him. Like, if there is a group of people it's fine because you can avoid too much contact, like at a party, but otherwise they will be too busy to be around her. His BFF will call him to do guy stuff, and she will insist on coming along, even if she is the only woman in the group and insists on him explaining every reference. Don't tell me she's just an asshole. IMO she is nuts. Unstable, and she is having a terrible effect on him.
|by Anonymous||reply 436||November 16, 2021 12:27 PM|
Their name is "Taylor Swift."
|by Anonymous||reply 437||November 16, 2021 12:32 PM|
[quote]I have to disagree with the assertion that a woman who has no woman friends has a personality disorder.
Same here. Men are actually more likely to have fewer or no friends of any gender, and male friendships tend to be more shallow and conditional, in my observation. Maintaining friendships past turning 30 is difficult for most people, and making new friends is almost impossible as you age further. OP sounds both young and misogynist.
|by Anonymous||reply 438||November 16, 2021 12:41 PM|
Almost all my friends are women. I'm a gay man.
I know a lot of women whose friends are almost all women, and I know a lot of women whose friends are almost all men, both straight and gay.
Some people are just more oriented toward one or the other.
It is interesting to me though that most married men do seem to cut themselves off from everyone but their wives, whereas most married women seem to have close friendships beyond their husbands.
|by Anonymous||reply 439||November 16, 2021 12:45 PM|
If someone tells you he wants to "get to know your soul".
|by Anonymous||reply 440||November 16, 2021 2:19 PM|
what if they tell you they want to get to know your hole?
|by Anonymous||reply 441||November 16, 2021 2:25 PM|
They usually have made-up histories of surviving gruesome violence and rape. Also, a lot of lies and issues around the entire issue of reproduction.
|by Anonymous||reply 442||November 16, 2021 2:31 PM|
R442, you just reminded me of a woman I met briefly when she was training to be my replacement at a job. We had lunch with the manager, a sort of farewell to me and a get-to-know-her thing. Her entire contribution to the lunch was a litany of her life’s tragedies. A break-up with a psycho ex that prompted her move to our city, her mother’s and brother’s deaths, a car accident, etc. A few times, we set our forks down and just looked at her in shock.
The manager seemed to express the appropriate sympathy, and I couldn’t tell if she recognized the red flags. I was so glad to get out of there, I just chuckled. They kind of deserved that nut.
|by Anonymous||reply 443||November 16, 2021 3:59 PM|
[quote] It is interesting to me though that most married men do seem to cut themselves off from everyone but their wives
It’s usually the Mrs who cuts her husband off from his friends.
|by Anonymous||reply 444||November 16, 2021 4:10 PM|
quote]It’s usually the Mrs who cuts her husband off from his friends.
This is hilarious. How does she do that? Taking his phone away, taking his car keys? Stamping her feet and blocking the exit? What husband is getting "cut off from his friends" by a woman?
Like, what exactly are you alluding to here?
|by Anonymous||reply 445||November 16, 2021 5:08 PM|
R445, I have known cases where a new spouse or a new steady girlfriend or boyfriend tries to keep their partner away from his or her friends. Sadly, some new spouses or girlfriends/boyfriends do that because of insecurity. But I don't think women tend to do this more than men, or vice versa, it really comes down to the security or insecurity level of the individual.
|by Anonymous||reply 446||November 16, 2021 5:20 PM|
[quote]It’s usually the Mrs who cuts her husband off from his friends.
yes, this was the case with my brother, she also alienated his family. At one point they were going to separate and he had no one, whereas she had a huge gang of gurlfriends. This is why men re-marry so quickly even after their beloved wives die.
|by Anonymous||reply 447||November 16, 2021 5:23 PM|
[quote]This is hilarious. How does she do that? Taking his phone away, taking his car keys? Stamping her feet and blocking the exit? What husband is getting "cut off from his friends" by a woman?
God, you're stupid it's way more subtle and manipulative than that. Do you know any women? Do you know any wicked women or partly wicked women? I think not.
|by Anonymous||reply 448||November 16, 2021 5:25 PM|
"Subtle yet unmistakable signs someone has a personality disorder"
They flake out on plans, don't return phone calls or messages, go AWOL for days.
And then when you see them next they never mention it or have a phony excuse.
|by Anonymous||reply 449||November 16, 2021 5:26 PM|
R449, yes, and that behavior is closely related to ghosting and also to something called "bread crumbing," which I just recently learned about. Look it up, it's interesting.
|by Anonymous||reply 450||November 16, 2021 5:29 PM|
[quote]Do you know any wicked women or partly wicked women? I think not.
"Wicked" women? Really? What century do you live in? Are you batshit fucking insane?
I think so.
|by Anonymous||reply 451||November 16, 2021 5:30 PM|
Women wicked! Big he man can't stand up to wicked woman! She is demon! Must burn her at stake!
|by Anonymous||reply 452||November 16, 2021 5:31 PM|
"Subtle yet unmistakable signs someone has a personality disorder"
They derail DL threads with off-topic pissing matches.
|by Anonymous||reply 453||November 16, 2021 5:37 PM|
I had a phone conversation with my mother yesterday. My brother will be in town (local to both of us) on Thanksgiving. She said she doesn't want to go to an expensive restaurant, because it's not worth it to pay that much for something she could make at home. She doesn't want to go to an inexpensive restaurant, because why bother, it's not worth getting up and risking covid for that. (We can't go to her house because she's a hoarder, and she won't come to my house anymore because we only have one bathroom--that's her reasoning for not coming here.) So I asked if she would be angry if my brother went out to a meal with my family without her (my mother). She indicated that that would bother her. I said he is not coming here just to see you, it is also to see his niece and nephew (my children). She said my brother doesn't have to see my kids over a meal.
Would the rest of you say that I am dealing with someone with a personality disorder?
|by Anonymous||reply 454||November 16, 2021 5:41 PM|
[quote]"Wicked" women? Really? What century do you live in? Are you batshit fucking insane? I think so.
what world do you live in? - you sound so innocent it's amazing.
|by Anonymous||reply 455||November 16, 2021 5:43 PM|
A world where "Wicked" is a shitty musical and not a word used to describe people in seriousness. Innocent? Sure we can go with that. You sound super smart by the way, a real brainiac.
I'd rather sound like me than sound like whatever the fuck you are.
|by Anonymous||reply 456||November 16, 2021 5:49 PM|
[quote]You sound super smart by the way, a real brainiac.
Yes, I am.
and you are not and it makes you aggressive and defensive.
|by Anonymous||reply 457||November 16, 2021 5:53 PM|
"My sister-in-law, one of the most together, loving, generous, and normal women I've ever known, chooses not to be anything other than acquaintances (on a need to interact basis, like for the kids) with other woman due to being stabbed in the back, lied about, bullied and betrayed by past women friends"
R433, the common element in all those backstabbing-bullying-and-betrayal relationships is your sister-in-law.
My guess is that there's a side to this woman you're not seeing, and frankly, you're probably safe enough from her, because some women are kind and generous to men and just plain vicious to other women. It's not an absolute indicator of a personality disorder, but you've got to hope that women like this never have daughters.
|by Anonymous||reply 458||November 16, 2021 7:37 PM|
[quote]It is interesting to me though that most married men do seem to cut themselves off from everyone but their wives, whereas most married women seem to have close friendships beyond their husbands.
[quote]It’s usually the Mrs who cuts her husband off from his friends.
You'd be surprised. I know the way people try to explain away the fact their friend no longer makes time for them is that it must be all the wife/girlfriend's fault, but believe me, many men CHOOSE to hang out less and less with their friends. That's probably something that would be too painful for the friends left to accept, so it gets blamed on the woman, but I've seen it happen many times. Its the "Yoko" affect. No one can believe that the men are more interested in spending time away from the group, but that's exactly what happens a lot of times. They have their family, their kids and pets and that's all they want.
|by Anonymous||reply 459||November 16, 2021 8:10 PM|
R443 As someone who survived a horrific childhood, I don't consider a lot of tragedy in one's life a red flag. I do consider telling someone you just met about it one though.
|by Anonymous||reply 460||November 16, 2021 9:38 PM|
|by Anonymous||reply 461||November 16, 2021 9:43 PM|
R454, You need to stop paying attention to you Mother and go ahead and make a plan . Make sure your brother is on board. And honestly, get thee to Whole Foods and order their holiday meal. It will work out perfectly and it really isn't that expensive. Tell Mommy you want to see her and she is welcome if she decides to show up. But when you said she was a hoarder, that was a clue that she is disordered
|by Anonymous||reply 462||November 16, 2021 10:22 PM|
Using the words "repig" or any other stupid term for people they don't agree with. It all exudes bloodlust.
|by Anonymous||reply 463||November 16, 2021 11:23 PM|
Chronic unreliability and/or chronic dishonesty.
A habit of "getting back" over petty slights, real or imagined.
Seeking sympathy even from strangers.
|by Anonymous||reply 464||November 17, 2021 1:45 AM|
[quote] Subtle yet unmistakable signs someone has a personality disorder
Unable to sit on the toilet without taking on their phone
|by Anonymous||reply 465||November 17, 2021 2:08 AM|
R439, I actually like women a lot, and want to be friends with them, but I never married and have no kids. I’ve had women literally turn away from me at a party when they find out I don’t have kids, and go talk to another woman with kids. Some women are really clannish and it’s like high school, forever.
Recently I read a man on Reddit asking if “he was the asshole.” His wife was still friends with an ex’s mom. The ex had an emergency and mom couldn’t watch his kid, so the mom asked the ex gf to watch his kid (by his new wife) a couple of hours while they tended to this emergency. She said sure. This guy on Reddit said he came home, found some random kid in the house, threw a complete hysterical tantrum, and decided his wife babysitting this kid meant she was still having sex with her ex. Ex had been nowhere around the whole time, that’s exactly why he needed a babysitter. What was really discouraging is several other posters agreed this guy was justified to think babysitting someone’s kid was a sign of a cheating wife. They said the wife should never speak to the ex or his family no matter what ever again after she met her now husband. It was a sign she was unfaithful.
And you wonder why people drop their friends after they get married?
|by Anonymous||reply 466||November 17, 2021 2:55 AM|
R185 splitting means black and white thinking. I recently got curious about what % of the people have personality disorders. Apparently, 1 in 10 people is walking around without a conscience. 3% of the people are psychopaths. 6% have NPD. They didn't mention BPD. That comes out to over 19 million people. The dark triad (NPD, PPD, and BPD) all have very similar traits but their motivations are different. People who are Malignant Narcissists are very dangerous vengeful people who are both Psychopaths and narcissists at the same time. Most of the trolls on the internet are in the dark triad according to researchers.
|by Anonymous||reply 467||November 17, 2021 3:36 AM|
^^^no conscience no empathy.
|by Anonymous||reply 468||November 17, 2021 3:38 AM|
"I don't consider a lot of tragedy in one's life a red flag. I do consider telling someone you just met about it one though."
Most people who have had horrific upbringings or who've survived a lot of tragedy or abuse don't talk about it to people they don't know well, they know damn well how unsympathetic people can be, and how they'll shut down their feelings when confronted with things they don't want to believe are possible. So many survivors of abuse or tragedy try to appear totally normal to casual inspection, because that's how they get accepted by co-workers or casual acquaintances. I've never talked about my abusive childhood with co-workers, the closest I come is when they ask me if I'm visiting family for the holidays, I say "Well, there's some issues there" and then I change the subject.
So yes, someone dumping all these tales of woe at a work luncheon with near strangers is waving a dozen red flags.
|by Anonymous||reply 469||November 17, 2021 4:59 AM|
If they're unkind to animals, it says a lot more about them.
I've dumped guys I was dating after I saw them being mean to my cat when they thought I wasn't looking.
|by Anonymous||reply 470||November 17, 2021 5:04 AM|
Women with no women friends is definitely a red flag, there’s a reason other women are avoiding them. Women who are the centre of a group of gay men should be avoided as well.
|by Anonymous||reply 471||November 17, 2021 6:12 AM|
R436 sounds like a total abominable cunt who makes up stories.
|by Anonymous||reply 472||November 17, 2021 9:35 AM|
So... what's the male equivalent of a woman who has zero female friends?
Or the straight male equivalent?
|by Anonymous||reply 473||November 23, 2021 10:08 AM|
Carrying an AR-15 and a roll of gauze, inciting violence, murdering others, and being acquitted on "self defense".
|by Anonymous||reply 474||November 23, 2021 10:29 AM|
R122, there is a difference between a personality flaw and a mental illness. The illness creates significant chronic problems for them in society or in close relationships. They may end up with significant legal problems like bankruptcy or criminal charges or cause others to have legal problems. They may end up as abusers or abused. These aren't people who are simply annoying, thoughtless or have some kind of odd behavior or poor social skill. They have chronic behavior patterns that result in either themselves or others being really unhappy or hurt.
|by Anonymous||reply 475||November 27, 2021 3:38 AM|
R34, I am not surprised. Typically, the reason the person seeks treatment is for symptoms of an affective disorder. The PD makes these much harder to treat and may be the cause of the affective symptoms. I see a lot of medical records in my job and my reaction is always irritation or annoyance, because there is so much manipulation, lying and/or inconsistencies across doctors and therapists. This makes it difficult and more time-consuming to make a decision.
|by Anonymous||reply 476||November 27, 2021 4:42 AM|
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