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Let's be a Bryan Singer pool party!!

I'm all of the braces in one place.

by Anonymousreply 214October 23, 2021 9:27 PM

I'm Seann William Scott.

by Anonymousreply 1September 29, 2021 6:18 AM

I'm the faint scent of Clearasil.

by Anonymousreply 2September 29, 2021 8:05 AM

I'm the foreskins that don't retract yet.

by Anonymousreply 3September 29, 2021 8:41 AM

I stopped being invited 5 years ago.

by Anonymousreply 4September 29, 2021 11:05 AM

I'm the answers to the DMV written test as promised on the invitation.

by Anonymousreply 5September 29, 2021 11:22 AM

I'm Alex Burton's ass, sore from the pounding I took so that he could get a tiny cameo in the first X-Men movie and then be discarded. At 19 I was firm and supple - at 40 I'll have trouble giving it away.

by Anonymousreply 6September 29, 2021 11:36 AM

I'm Nicholas Hoult and I certainly never attended one of these, and definitely don't still have the complimentary speedo to prove it.

by Anonymousreply 7September 29, 2021 11:47 AM

R7 Hoult was 24 when Singer directed him - so a bit old for his tastes.

by Anonymousreply 8September 29, 2021 12:23 PM

I'm the tray of jello shots laced with enough muscle relaxant to take down an elephant.

by Anonymousreply 9September 29, 2021 12:29 PM

r8 I mean Ben Hardy was about 25 when Singer cast him in X-Men and I don't doubt something happened there. Plus look at him. He fits right in on twink airways.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 10September 29, 2021 12:49 PM

I'm the Jansport backpacks left at the check-in filled with HS textbooks.

by Anonymousreply 11September 29, 2021 5:39 PM

I'm Kevin Spacey going in for a dive in the deep end.

by Anonymousreply 12September 29, 2021 11:52 PM

R1 Did Singer help you reenact the prostate milking scene from Road Trip?

by Anonymousreply 13September 30, 2021 12:06 AM

We are going be extras!!

by Anonymousreply 14September 30, 2021 12:11 AM

I'm the overwhelming scent of Axe Body Spray.

by Anonymousreply 15September 30, 2021 12:18 AM

I'm the WeHo-wannabe 17-year-old queen reading everything I can about Bryan Singer fantasizing about going to a Hollywood blockbuster, having fun, partying, engaging in consensual sex and praying for an invite to one of Singer's parties. AND I FEEL TOTALLY NORMAL ABOUT ALL OF THAT....

by Anonymousreply 16September 30, 2021 12:19 AM

I'm Timothee Chalamet, giving it a pass and therefore losing the role of Cyclops to Tye Sheridan, the little hussy

by Anonymousreply 17September 30, 2021 12:26 AM

I'm Brock Pierce. I am here but I am too busy planning my next scheme to...wow...damn!!

by Anonymousreply 18September 30, 2021 12:40 AM

“I thought there will be girls here!”

by Anonymousreply 19September 30, 2021 12:47 AM

[quote] We are going be extras!!

Atmosphere players!

by Anonymousreply 20September 30, 2021 1:17 AM

I'm the "No grass on the infield" admission requirement.

by Anonymousreply 21September 30, 2021 1:29 AM

[quote] I'm the "No grass on the infield" admission requirement.

I’m the “Cannot ride if taller than this line” sign.

by Anonymousreply 22September 30, 2021 1:39 AM

My mom says I have to wait two hours before going back in after eating...

by Anonymousreply 23September 30, 2021 1:44 AM

I'm the FBI busting it.

by Anonymousreply 24September 30, 2021 2:03 AM

Overheard:

"I'm 14 but look older!"

"I'm 16 but look younger!"

by Anonymousreply 25September 30, 2021 2:09 AM

"Ok, but this is my swim team speedo, so if I take it off...

by Anonymousreply 26September 30, 2021 2:17 AM

R17 Singer plumbed the depths of Tye's "talent" - up past the wrist.

by Anonymousreply 27September 30, 2021 2:25 AM

Tonight in the screening room…..

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 28September 30, 2021 2:31 AM

Also overheard:

"He's 17 and wasn't invited."

by Anonymousreply 29September 30, 2021 2:33 AM

"I'm going to need some more 'motivation'."

by Anonymousreply 30September 30, 2021 2:35 AM

r30 "Here they were giving out these Blue pills. And something they call vitamin K at the door."

by Anonymousreply 31September 30, 2021 2:51 AM

"Oh, no, I forgot to do my algebra homework!"

by Anonymousreply 32September 30, 2021 2:51 AM

I'm Kevin Spacey, here for Bryan's castoffs

by Anonymousreply 33September 30, 2021 2:54 AM

I'm all that 2000-era Aeropostale clothes and puka shell necklaces.

by Anonymousreply 34September 30, 2021 2:55 AM

"Think of this as your bar mitzvah, you're becoming a man. Just without presents... unless you want this box of flavored condoms?"

by Anonymousreply 35September 30, 2021 2:55 AM

I'm the pile of confiscated cell phones.

by Anonymousreply 36September 30, 2021 4:09 AM

I'm the food appropriate for the crowd -- Hot Pockets and stacks of In N Out.

by Anonymousreply 37September 30, 2021 4:11 AM

I'm the large bottle of lube disguised as hand sanitizer.

by Anonymousreply 38September 30, 2021 5:12 AM

I'm Bryan's loud moans and grunts

by Anonymousreply 39September 30, 2021 4:02 PM

I'm the bouncer carding the guests at the door.

KIDDING!

by Anonymousreply 40September 30, 2021 4:29 PM

I'm Sir Ian McKellen. Which little hobbit wants to help me find my wand?

by Anonymousreply 41September 30, 2021 4:36 PM

I'm Clive Davis, sitting in the corner jacking off under a caftan and planning a brunch.

by Anonymousreply 42September 30, 2021 4:52 PM

I'm Hugh Jackman. I'm totally heterosexual. I'm only here to talk business with Bryan, I swear!

by Anonymousreply 43September 30, 2021 4:58 PM

Has anyone seen my butt cherry - I know I had it when I got here.

by Anonymousreply 44September 30, 2021 5:10 PM

I'm Pete Townshend. I am only here doing research.

by Anonymousreply 45September 30, 2021 5:24 PM

[quote]Let's be a Bryan Singer pool party!!

No thank you, officer.

by Anonymousreply 46September 30, 2021 5:25 PM

I'm the stinky sneakers and feet.

by Anonymousreply 47September 30, 2021 5:50 PM

I am Bryan's baby mama Michelle Clunie, holding my baby very tightly while declaring "Ghislaine Maxwell? I've never, ever heard that name... I don't know who that is and I've never procured underaged boys to anyone!".

by Anonymousreply 48September 30, 2021 6:12 PM

I'm Dustin Lance Black. I didn't bring my husband because he's too old for me now.

by Anonymousreply 49September 30, 2021 6:13 PM

I'm the Playstation console on the glass table in the entertainment lounge, next to the lines of coke.

by Anonymousreply 50September 30, 2021 6:43 PM

I'm the drawstring swimming trunks that also have a zipper in the back - for some reason.

by Anonymousreply 51September 30, 2021 7:13 PM

I'm Jaxxon and Jaden, fighting for the position of #1 boy in Bryan's harem

by Anonymousreply 52September 30, 2021 8:36 PM

I forgot.. is BS a top or bottom?

by Anonymousreply 53September 30, 2021 9:10 PM

^ forget

by Anonymousreply 54September 30, 2021 9:18 PM

I'm Chance. That's the new name Mr. Singer gave me yesterday.

He told me this party was the start of my great adventure and that after tonight I'd never feel the same again.

He's really nice. My aunt here said it would take years to get a start in the business and finish high school. But look how fast it's happening!

He said he had a part for me to hear about and take in but not to tell anyone yet! But I had to tell you.

by Anonymousreply 55September 30, 2021 9:31 PM

I'm the KY lube all over the inflatable pool toys

by Anonymousreply 56September 30, 2021 10:12 PM

I'm the tear-stained rejection letters from Big Brothers Big Sisters of America

by Anonymousreply 57September 30, 2021 10:39 PM

I'm just here for the food. Seriously. I wrapped some food in a napkin and now I want to get out of here. Is there a way out through those hedges?

by Anonymousreply 58September 30, 2021 11:12 PM

I'm Kyle.

I'm here to bottom because Bryan got me a job at Helix.

Which I can take in several years when I'm legal.

by Anonymousreply 59October 1, 2021 12:57 AM

He loves getting topped by sophomores R53!

by Anonymousreply 60October 1, 2021 1:03 AM

I'm Deborra Lee Furness, here to drag Hugh home! Those teen hussies need to stay away from him!

by Anonymousreply 61October 1, 2021 1:10 AM

I'm all the skateboards.

by Anonymousreply 62October 1, 2021 1:32 AM

I'm the poor maid, Maria, cleaning up this mess the next morning.

by Anonymousreply 63October 1, 2021 3:35 AM

I'm Bryan, threatening to send Maria back to El Salvador if she breathes a word of what happened at the party!

by Anonymousreply 64October 1, 2021 4:00 AM

I'm Maria nodding and spraying some Febreze on a passed-out twink.

by Anonymousreply 65October 1, 2021 4:04 AM

I'm the chest freezer full of pizza pockets and bottles of GHB.

by Anonymousreply 66October 1, 2021 6:22 AM

I'm the recently dropped balls.

by Anonymousreply 67October 1, 2021 9:56 AM

I'm Keith and have I got news for you....................................

by Anonymousreply 68October 1, 2021 10:46 AM

I'm the cold dead body of Brad Renfro.

Please don't forget me and what Hollywood did to me.

by Anonymousreply 69October 1, 2021 11:34 AM

I’m the twinks who got hired to act interested in the uglier old men in attendance.

by Anonymousreply 70October 1, 2021 12:18 PM

I am Spacey.

by Anonymousreply 71October 1, 2021 2:45 PM

I'm Datalounge clutching its pearls.

by Anonymousreply 72October 1, 2021 3:35 PM

I’m the ambitious 17 year old Nairing my pubes, armpits, and chest to appear more like one of Bryan’s fantasy bois.

by Anonymousreply 73October 1, 2021 4:37 PM

I'm the ghosts of all the boys buried under the gardener's shed.

by Anonymousreply 74October 1, 2021 5:34 PM

I'm Marc Collins-Rector's bad wig, about the clog the pool's drain.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 75October 1, 2021 5:41 PM

I'm rape.

by Anonymousreply 76October 1, 2021 6:05 PM

I’m the phrase “what’s that weird smell” thought by 95% of the inexperienced crowd as the scent of poppers wafts around a bit.

by Anonymousreply 77October 1, 2021 6:49 PM

Overheard: "Hey, isn't that the dad from American Beauty?"

by Anonymousreply 78October 1, 2021 7:04 PM

And "Hey, it's Gandalf and Wolverine!"

by Anonymousreply 79October 1, 2021 7:48 PM

I'm Michelle Clunie. I've seen some things that a woman ain't supposed to see...

by Anonymousreply 80October 1, 2021 8:01 PM

Okay, everybody stop what you’re doing. STOP, right NOW!!!

Brendan has lost his retainer, and his mom will KILL him if he comes home without it. Can everyone please help look? He thinks he took it out after he was given that open can of Coke, but then frankly he says he got real dizzy and he doesn’t remember the next six hours…

by Anonymousreply 81October 1, 2021 8:08 PM

There's more peach fuzz here than a Georgia orchard.

by Anonymousreply 82October 1, 2021 8:21 PM

I wonder if Ben Hardy went to one of these or if his interactions with Bryan Singer were more private and intimate?

by Anonymousreply 83October 1, 2021 8:40 PM

I'm the pubescent voices cracking.

by Anonymousreply 84October 1, 2021 8:42 PM

I'm the taking of the selfie while standing behind two twinks, "presenting them" to the camera.

by Anonymousreply 85October 1, 2021 8:52 PM

I'm the gardener trying to avoid stepping in the still-sticky cum that covering the entire lawn the next morning.

by Anonymousreply 86October 1, 2021 8:59 PM

I'm Noah Galvin with a grovelling apology for speaking the truth

by Anonymousreply 87October 1, 2021 9:27 PM

I'm Noah Galvin's stretched out hole after attending one of these parties.

by Anonymousreply 88October 1, 2021 9:30 PM

I'm the clueless mom from Tarzan in an SUV dropping my son off because he's too young to drive. Pool party with some wholesome role-model men sounds pretty darn great to me! 10 PM sounds kinda late for a party to start though.

by Anonymousreply 89October 1, 2021 9:38 PM

I'm the 23 year old Laotian girl mistaken for a pre-pubescent boy. But I'm game.

by Anonymousreply 90October 1, 2021 9:42 PM

I'm Elliot Page waiting for an invite.

by Anonymousreply 91October 1, 2021 9:43 PM

R91 Keep waiting, toots. This is a mandatory full frontal nude party

by Anonymousreply 92October 1, 2021 10:45 PM

R65 I'm Maria's teen son Raul, in agony from her screams when she finds me nude and sticky near the poolhouse.

by Anonymousreply 93October 2, 2021 5:42 AM

I'm JC Chasez, my manager brought me here.

by Anonymousreply 94October 2, 2021 1:02 PM

I’m the juice boxes lined up on the one table by the pool.

by Anonymousreply 95October 2, 2021 1:12 PM

I am the poor teen queen ingenue, brought to the party by a young, dumb straight boy. I do not understand why none of the guys at this party have even looked at me, let alone offered me a drink!

by Anonymousreply 96October 2, 2021 1:19 PM

Wait... is that a thing R3? That the foreskins on uncut cocks on start to retract at puberty?

by Anonymousreply 97October 2, 2021 1:20 PM

phimosis is a thing.

by Anonymousreply 98October 2, 2021 2:49 PM

I'm the comforting Avengers-themed sleeping bags for when the boys awake from their roofie-induced stupor.

by Anonymousreply 99October 2, 2021 2:53 PM

100!

by Anonymousreply 100October 2, 2021 3:00 PM

R100 - Is one 100 the maximum or minimum number of months a guest must be to attend?

by Anonymousreply 101October 2, 2021 3:01 PM

I'm Ben Platt, looking for someone to pump up my non-existent career.

by Anonymousreply 102October 2, 2021 4:18 PM

I'm Aaron Carter, feeling like I'm about to die from the amount of makeup they've hosed onto me to try and make me look young and fresh.

by Anonymousreply 103October 2, 2021 4:25 PM

I'm Chris Mears, being directed by the host in a scene with Liam Riley

by Anonymousreply 104October 2, 2021 5:06 PM

I'm Tom Daley, fapping furiously as I watch Chris and Liam going at it and hiding from my aging uptight husband.

by Anonymousreply 105October 2, 2021 7:01 PM

I'm the pile of Underoos Bryan keeps in the spare room.

by Anonymousreply 106October 2, 2021 7:04 PM

R106 Next to the Scout uniforms.

by Anonymousreply 107October 2, 2021 7:07 PM

I'm the dead 11 year old twink discovered the morning after. My slim, hairless 70 lb body was discovered at the bottom of the pool. I certainly regret sticking my butthole on the pool drain. I was trying to clean it out after Bryan and his buddies had their way with me.

by Anonymousreply 108October 2, 2021 7:10 PM

I'm the English-Korean dictionary thrown in the trash after Singer realized how old the guys in BTS actually are.

by Anonymousreply 109October 2, 2021 7:10 PM

R108 It was a "Final Destination" pool party all along.

by Anonymousreply 110October 2, 2021 7:12 PM

I'm DL fav Dylan G actually trying to defend Bryan Singer and calling him a good friend

by Anonymousreply 111October 2, 2021 7:20 PM

... and I'm the underage looking boyfriend Dylan brings along to the party, explaining why Dylan and Bryan are good friends

by Anonymousreply 112October 2, 2021 7:26 PM

N..nnno, Mr. Singer. I don't shave. No, Sir. I don't need to shave. I bumped my cheek and scratched it. I can still go tonight, can't I? Please?

by Anonymousreply 113October 2, 2021 7:41 PM

I'm the cops.

I just came by to make sure everything is OK, Sir. We got a report from some of your neighbors, so you should probably take the boys into the basement before you...well, have a good night, Sir.

by Anonymousreply 114October 2, 2021 7:46 PM

R93: ¡Querido Señor en el Cielo!

by Anonymousreply 115October 2, 2021 7:53 PM

Rafel, would you please ask Mr. Singer where Billy is? He went up to the big house last night and he's not back. And his stuff was gone this morning.

by Anonymousreply 116October 2, 2021 9:01 PM

I'm the TigerHeat bouncers counting the cash in exchange for not checking IDs

by Anonymousreply 117October 2, 2021 9:13 PM

I'm the leftover exotic animals from Neverland Ranch

by Anonymousreply 118October 2, 2021 9:15 PM

I'm the massive off-shores bank account used to "calm down" irate parents.

by Anonymousreply 119October 2, 2021 9:16 PM

I’m the Mini wireless camera disguised as a puka shell. This place is pure gold!

by Anonymousreply 120October 2, 2021 9:21 PM

I'm Brayden.

What does "fresh meat" mean?

by Anonymousreply 121October 2, 2021 9:24 PM

I'm the stopwatch used to measure the life span of a twink

by Anonymousreply 122October 2, 2021 9:25 PM

I'm the pool guy, called out every Monday to clear the cum from the pool filter. On the plus side, no hair in there.

by Anonymousreply 123October 2, 2021 9:45 PM

I'm visiting So Cal from the Mid West, staying at my relatives home, next-door to BS house.

Told to stay far, away from this celeb. Crazy rumors of multiple deaths of young teen boys.

by Anonymousreply 124October 2, 2021 9:46 PM

[quote]I'm Alex Burton's ass, sore from the pounding I took so that he could get a tiny cameo in the first X-Men movie and then be discarded. At 19 I was firm and supple - at 40 I'll have trouble giving it away.

You were discarded because Aaron Stanford didn't need to blow Singer.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 125October 2, 2021 9:55 PM

I'm the résumé with nothing on it but a couple of commercials.

by Anonymousreply 126October 2, 2021 10:15 PM

I'm R113 being escorted by security out after Bryan had a meltdown over the razor burn on my right ass cheek. As I'm doing my walk of shame past the main pool area, the other twinks look me up and down, giggle and smugly stroke their oiled up, impeccably waxed (not shaved!) ass cheeks. One cunt mouthes 'amateur!' at me.

by Anonymousreply 127October 2, 2021 11:21 PM

R127 I'm the van that you get taken to by security to be "taken home" - the one with restraints. Your day is about to get even worse, shaver.

by Anonymousreply 128October 2, 2021 11:48 PM

R125 Nope, he'd learned to just get on his knees and hold his mouth open by the time Singer met him.

by Anonymousreply 129October 2, 2021 11:50 PM

I'm the trio of older movie and tv executives, taking a break from the carnage and reminiscing about all the boy actors we fucked over the years.

by Anonymousreply 130October 2, 2021 11:59 PM

Please don't mock Mr. Singer's pool parties

I got this cool video after I went to one!

by Anonymousreply 131October 3, 2021 12:00 AM

My video

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 132October 3, 2021 12:01 AM

I'm the basket of Cialis by the pool.

by Anonymousreply 133October 3, 2021 12:02 AM

I'm United States Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC). I've heard rumors about the illegalities ongoing at these parties, and in my capacity as a member of...one of them committees I'm on, I'm here to investigate!

by Anonymousreply 134October 3, 2021 12:14 AM

Hi, I'm HIV! No one invited me, but I came anyway!

by Anonymousreply 135October 3, 2021 12:14 AM

I'm the Instagram/TikTok/social media and cellphone addiction of later twinks that will make these pool parties impossible after the early '00s.

by Anonymousreply 136October 3, 2021 12:17 AM

I'm Rick, aka "Thick" Rick, the guy Singer sends the mouthy "actors" to.

by Anonymousreply 137October 3, 2021 12:51 AM

I'm Barron Trump's private invitation.

by Anonymousreply 138October 3, 2021 3:54 AM

No means no.

Unless....

by Anonymousreply 139October 3, 2021 9:21 AM

I'm the Adoption Booth behind a velvet rope next to the pool, providing safe, legal, no questions asked adoptions at a reduced rate. I'm here for the special relationships that can often form at these parties.

by Anonymousreply 140October 3, 2021 12:21 PM

I'm the "no swimsuits necessary" sign.

by Anonymousreply 141October 3, 2021 4:53 PM

I’m the active and lively Pokémon card trade market. Mr. Singer includes a new unopened pack in every gift bag!

by Anonymousreply 142October 3, 2021 5:55 PM

I'm Corey Feldman.

I'm not invited because I'm already 50 years old.

by Anonymousreply 143October 3, 2021 6:26 PM

R143 You're 35 years too old, my dear!

by Anonymousreply 144October 3, 2021 6:46 PM

I'm the "no swimsuits allowed" sign.

by Anonymousreply 145October 3, 2021 6:47 PM

I'm the fecal matter floating in the pool the next morning.

by Anonymousreply 146October 3, 2021 8:16 PM

R138, Barron: you go with nice man to pool party. Do vat he says!

by Anonymousreply 147October 3, 2021 10:31 PM

R144 He'd have bag over his head even at 15.

by Anonymousreply 148October 3, 2021 10:31 PM

I'm the crystal bowl filled with condoms, sitting all alone and ignored.

by Anonymousreply 149October 3, 2021 11:44 PM

I'm the spinning instructor - no bike in sight.

by Anonymousreply 150October 4, 2021 12:45 AM

I'm the ZERO asshairs in sight!

by Anonymousreply 151October 4, 2021 10:29 AM

I'm the suspiciously stained couch in the pool house.

by Anonymousreply 152October 4, 2021 11:52 AM

I'm the roofies disguised as Flintstone vitamins. Wilma packs a wallop!

by Anonymousreply 153October 4, 2021 12:14 PM

Just how perma is permacum anyway?

by Anonymousreply 154October 4, 2021 12:16 PM

I'm the five combined chest hairs in the pool.

by Anonymousreply 155October 4, 2021 12:47 PM

I'm Michael Jackson offering a free concert.

by Anonymousreply 156October 4, 2021 12:48 PM

I'm the increasingly-worried Chuck-E-Cheese party worker.

by Anonymousreply 157October 4, 2021 12:53 PM

I’m the bike rack in the parking lot.

by Anonymousreply 158October 4, 2021 1:39 PM

I'm the pre-algebra homework.

by Anonymousreply 159October 4, 2021 1:49 PM

I'm sex with the barely conscious.

by Anonymousreply 160October 4, 2021 2:02 PM

Miss Singer would've hoovered Peter Brady's cock to completion.

by Anonymousreply 161October 4, 2021 2:57 PM

I'm Ian McKellen playing "Let's All Find The Ring In The Poolhouse" with the pizza delivery boys.

by Anonymousreply 162October 4, 2021 3:57 PM

I'm Greg Brady, trying to get Bobby outta here. Sorry, Peter, you're on your own.

by Anonymousreply 163October 4, 2021 10:20 PM

I'm the District Attorney's investigation 12 years later!

by Anonymousreply 164October 4, 2021 11:11 PM

'Honey, why did only Jadyn get an invite to Mr. Singer's party tonight?'

by Anonymousreply 165October 4, 2021 11:22 PM

I'm the sore underage butt hole that can't remember anything from the night before.

by Anonymousreply 166October 4, 2021 11:44 PM

I'm the slightly more seasoned teen, reassuring the other boys that "it's tiny".

by Anonymousreply 167October 4, 2021 11:50 PM

Good one R166. Hasn't been mentioned it.

by Anonymousreply 168October 5, 2021 12:45 PM

I'm Shawn Roberts, cringing whenever I remember being at the party when I was 15.

by Anonymousreply 169October 6, 2021 11:05 AM

I'm the casting couch in Ms. Singer's bedroom.

by Anonymousreply 170October 12, 2021 3:30 AM

I'm the extra bottle of Chlorine to kill all the DNA evidence in the pool!

by Anonymousreply 171October 12, 2021 4:36 AM

I'm Bryan dressed as a priest!

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 172October 12, 2021 4:41 AM

I'm the Spanish Inquisition-themed play room where the boys dry off.

by Anonymousreply 173October 12, 2021 3:13 PM

I’m the lesbian hardcore porn playing on the tv screens.

by Anonymousreply 174October 12, 2021 5:07 PM

I'm the first sprouts of pubic hair.

by Anonymousreply 175October 12, 2021 5:20 PM

R174 found a wrong thread

by Anonymousreply 176October 12, 2021 5:56 PM

'I'm 24 but I swear I look 14!"

by Anonymousreply 177October 13, 2021 12:05 AM

I’m the ProActiv 3 Step Treatment products in the guest goodie bags

by Anonymousreply 178October 13, 2021 2:04 PM

I am the big black thug who will drop the soap in the prison shower

by Anonymousreply 179October 13, 2021 3:25 PM

I’m the creepy guy who used to go around weho recruiting guys to party with a “star soccer player” and the creator of some shitty tvs shows.

by Anonymousreply 180October 13, 2021 3:27 PM

I'm the annual Christmas party; sponsored by the local Archdiocese.

Services are held in every blessed room of the house!

by Anonymousreply 181October 13, 2021 3:49 PM

I'm the host of the Christmas party!

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 182October 13, 2021 3:52 PM

I'm the closet filled with Cub Scout uniforms.

by Anonymousreply 183October 13, 2021 3:57 PM

I'm the roomful of Molestation Dolls that the police will use to find out where the kids were touched.

by Anonymousreply 184October 14, 2021 11:51 AM

I'm all the STD's being passed around.

by Anonymousreply 185October 14, 2021 12:12 PM

[quote] He loves getting topped by sophomores [R53]!

Does he really?

by Anonymousreply 186October 14, 2021 7:04 PM

I'm the Underoos

by Anonymousreply 187October 14, 2021 8:47 PM

I'm the imaginary movie role that no one is going to get.

by Anonymousreply 188October 14, 2021 9:18 PM

I'm the dingaling twink who didn't know you're supposed to let the water out after douching. Bruce Willis doesn't like me anymore all of a sudden. 😔

by Anonymousreply 189October 14, 2021 9:39 PM

[quote] I'm the imaginary movie role that no one is going to get.

I'm the real porn movie no one is realizing they're making.

by Anonymousreply 190October 14, 2021 9:46 PM

Daniel Craig: Noice shindig, innit mate?

Skyler: Like, are you from France?

by Anonymousreply 191October 14, 2021 9:47 PM

R191 I'm Skyler's fake ID, which fools no one.

by Anonymousreply 192October 14, 2021 11:32 PM

I'm the 250 mops used to clean up the baby gravy.

by Anonymousreply 193October 16, 2021 1:12 AM

I'm the surprise place where the shish-kabob have been kept warm.

by Anonymousreply 194October 16, 2021 1:37 AM

They call Singer the Countess because he likes to bathe in the cum of young male virgins.

by Anonymousreply 195October 16, 2021 2:25 AM

R195, you mean the urine of young male virgins

by Anonymousreply 196October 16, 2021 2:27 AM

I'm Corbin Fisher's Connor's residuals check

by Anonymousreply 197October 16, 2021 2:35 AM

R196 No, he likes to shower in that.

by Anonymousreply 198October 16, 2021 3:01 AM

I'm Kevin Spacey and Singer getting into a slapfight over a hunk of 14 year old meat.

by Anonymousreply 199October 22, 2021 6:09 AM

I’m the guy who delivers the needle-pricked condoms.

by Anonymousreply 200October 22, 2021 6:14 AM

I’m the director of the virgin’s “Welcome to the pleasures of anal sex!” A 10 minute course, which ends with a device delivering lube to said virgin’s asses.

by Anonymousreply 201October 22, 2021 6:25 AM

I'm Singer's alternative version of "Boys Beware," which details the perils of pussy and heterosexual sex.

by Anonymousreply 202October 22, 2021 6:54 AM

I am the security guard checking IDs to make sure no one under 18 gets in. Hahaha. Just kidding. I am a fifteen year old boy.

by Anonymousreply 203October 22, 2021 7:00 AM

I'm Singer's personal attorney on speed dial.

by Anonymousreply 204October 22, 2021 12:08 PM

I am Ilan Mitchell Smith in Weird Science. Thank God neither me nor my adorable frisky twink castmates had to put up with this degradation back in the day.

What, you want me to wear Kelly's bikini underwear in this scene, John?

Sure.

by Anonymousreply 205October 22, 2021 1:48 PM

OP is the founder of N A M B L A. Disgusting.

by Anonymousreply 206October 22, 2021 1:53 PM

I'm the suspicious mounds of freshly-dug earth behind the guest house.

by Anonymousreply 207October 22, 2021 3:49 PM

[quote] I'm the suspicious mounds of freshly-dug earth behind the guest house.

I’m the suspicious mounds of freshly-shaved pubes behind the bathroom door.

by Anonymousreply 208October 22, 2021 9:16 PM

R205 Singer would have thrown out a hip banging that fresh meat.

by Anonymousreply 209October 23, 2021 12:05 AM

I’m Marc and Lori, and wonder why we never get invited. What’s he trying to hide? Is he ashamed of his family? They’re the talk of H’wood. Plus, since our careers have gone nowhere, you’d think he’d throw us a few roles from time to time.

by Anonymousreply 210October 23, 2021 5:27 AM

I'm the psychotropic medication the boys will need years later when they suffer from "false memory recall" after a failed or short-lived acting career.

by Anonymousreply 211October 23, 2021 12:55 PM

I am Halle Berry, getting my ass kissed.

by Anonymousreply 212October 23, 2021 12:57 PM

R210 Marc is on Bryan's shit list ever since he refused to introduce Bryan to young Billy Jacoby during the production of "Beastmaster".

by Anonymousreply 213October 23, 2021 6:23 PM

This is such a twisted, irresponsible thread to post! Where is the decency? Where is the compassion? Where the hell did I put my fourth martini? Oops, I just broke my strand of pearls. Pulled it too tight.

Damn you, Datalounge! Nothing is sacred!

by Anonymousreply 214October 23, 2021 9:27 PM
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