The author's favorite is the Oyster 🦪
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Oyster 🦪
Accept no substitutes: This is the one. I don’t understand people who refuse to admit that. The oyster is as close as the emoji dictionary gets to a perfect pussy mimesis. The shape is right, the little bivalve calls to mind a highly appropriate brininess and texture and let’s not forget that the oyster is a famous aphrodisiac — so the inherent eroticism of the thing is a fine match for the eggplant, firm and tall. Plus, the hinge at the oyster’s top resembles a clit, and the desktop version of the oyster emoji even contains a pearl, which gestures toward the rarefied and luxurious conditions inside a vagina. No other emoji compares. Why even bother continuing?
