Why am I invisible?

[quote]I’ll meet people three of four times and each time, I have to remind them that we’ve met before.

Oh, girl. That's normal.

Sometimes I even do it on purpose.

Try walking up to someone who annoyed you three years ago, knowing full well who they are and say, "Hello, nice to meet you."

I don't know about "gay ghettos," but I feel invisible a lot, too. I try to look at the positive side of it. It does allow you a lot of freedom and privacy.

It's a thing.

OP, on the up side, this is proof that you are not grotesque looking.

Is this you, OP?

Yesterday, upon the stair,

I met a man who wasn't there!

He wasn't there again today,

Oh how I wish he'd go away!

Better than a hot guy calling you 'Sir.'

^^ Oh man, I hate that. ^^

You just need a black curly wig, OP

It worked for me.

They do notice you, OP, but it's polite to wait until someone's out of earshot before laughing at them.

My question - what do you expect to happen? Guys don't stare down other guys - maybe in a cruising area - but not on a street.

IF ONLY men were that forthcoming in if they had interest in you.

Are you staring at everyone expecting a facial reply of YES! That ain't gonna happen either. Staring at people in a big city is a warning sign, so people would naturally avoid you.

It sounds like you're pretty naive about these things.

Being average can be hard, if you’re sensitive

[quote] I often walk down streets of gay ghettos and no one looks.

Boris is trolling again.

Troll thread.

Some people possess a natural inner light that glows from within them and attracts others. You do not have this light. You’re not special. That doesn’t mean you can’t have a profound effect on others, if you choose to. You could be a fundraiser for a charity, sit with elderly at a home, pick up trash at the beach, or hook up with an ultra eldergay (over 70.) It’s all up to you!

[quote] Why am I invisible?

If you can't see your reflection in the mirror, it means you're a witch. So there's that.

I’m ugly and have been invisible all my life. Sometimes it’s fun to see how much I can get away with it. I’ve stolen drinks at bars etc and no one even notices.

Gay ghettos? Okay, James Baldwin.

Spoiler alert, not everyone is hot. Accept you aren't hot and move on with your life. Or become a gym addict and get muscled if you actually want to do something about it.

I often walk down the streets of GAY GHETTOS- OP , this is NOT 1977.

There are still places with a high concentration of gay guys r18. Walk through 9th Avenue in hells kitchen.

It's ok, OP.

I am invisible. When I walk with relatively hot friends, guys turn at look at them.

Most people are invisible r21. Some people are attractive enough that they do turn heads, most of us do not. Not everyone is gonna have pretty privilege.

Wear a strap-on outside of your Daisy Dukes and you will be less invisible.

Neg and make fun of hot dumb popular people, especially about their intelligence. It’s fun watching them glitch.

The attractive people need to check their privilege. They get everything handed to them. Ugly lives matter. Let’s start a movement.

[quote] Why am I invisible? I often walk down streets of gay ghettos and no one looks. I’ll meet people three of four times and each time, I have to remind them that we’ve met before. It’s been like this much of my life.

Ah, could it be that you are in the wrong ghetto?

I don’t understand why I’m so unmemorable.

R19 that’s a tough crowd.

OP do you expect them to come running down the street screaming like you’re one of the Beatles?

R6, I LOVE young hot guys calling me “Sir.”

……….

On the spectrum dear?

[quote] I often walk down streets of gay ghettos and no one looks

because you are fat

OP, it's a self fulfilling prophecy. You expect to be invisible and people react to you that way. Or should I say don't react to you.

Consider it a blessing.

Sure, ‘the grass is always greener’ - but being invisible has its advantages.

Individuals that have ‘that light from within’, as mentioned above, are attractive for whatever reason or simply stand out are not only attractive to desirable people.

They are attractive to grifters, users, sociopaths, needy, entitled, shallow, vengeful, resentful people as well.

Enjoy life under the radar.

And open your eyes to the types that ‘the attractive ones’ are attracting.

R32, I find that fat people actually aren't invisible. People keep staring at them

I hate R8.

I embrace my invisibility, do you really want everyone noticing you OP, because you wouldn't get just the people you wanted noticing you, you would get all the crazies and attention from all sorts of people you really would prefer not to deal with. It is much easier to bring attention to yourself by the people you chose, than to get rid of the crazies you don't want bothering you.If

I could wish for a super power I would wish to make myself completely invisible at times.

OP, do you work at Urban Outfitters and dress like a pirate yoga instructor?

I didn't notice your face, but I did see you swivel your hips like an old lady crackhead.

Oh, honey! This is the last question to ask on DL.

I’m pretty lucky in that I have a nice face but a really memorable name. Ben.

“Handsome Ben packing ten” as they say in my circle.

I feel your pain. But my situation is worse. Try being the hot, sought after, popular one from age 19 to 38, THEN having your looks quickly fade away. The calling card (your looks) you depended on, and used almost daily, is now gone. I’m almost completely invisible now, except to drunk strangers in a low-lit bar. Be thankful you were never handsome or attractive so you don’t have to feel the pain of knowing what you lost, like I do every single day.

Try looking like a teenager until age 35 and see what kind of freaks call you out on the street.

They're all hands with multiple chins.

[quote] “Handsome Ben packing ten” as they say in my circle.

No, they don't.

Op, you sound needy and exhausting. Sorry you’re unattractive.

[quote] Not everyone is gonna have pretty privilege.

As someone afflicted with pretty privilege let me tell you it’s not easy.

Pardon the digression, but R5's poem made me laugh, remembering that I saw it years ago with the last line replaced as: "I think he's from the CIA."

ARE you from the CIA, OP? If not, perhaps you should go and tell them your impressive credentials.

OP I am invisible too and also unmemorable. I've had fuckbuddies not recognize me. FML.

R47, crap, that's me too.

In fact, I had one not even remember me about 3 hours later! I literally had to remind him who I was when I saw him out after our hookup.

I have this weird ability to remember faces forever. I used to say hi to people, thinking they remembered me too, but after all those confused looks, I wait until they show that they might recognize me

Go Ask Alison...

When I was younger I used to get Alison Moyet and Helen Terry (Culture Club's backup singer) mixed up.

Helen was pissed at Boy George because he outed her as a big ole Dyke

*Bump* Are you still alive OP? So many of these threads just disappear over the years and we didn’t hear how (or if) the OP died.

OP, if you believe that any attention is good attention, then I suggest you cultivate an outlandish appearance to be memorable. Wear crazy outfits, dye your hair in unnatural colors, put on clownish makeup, be flamboyant with every gesture, etc. You'll be remembered. Not necessarily admired, but certainly remembered.

Start letting huge farts. They’ll remember you.

People who complain about being invisible are complaining about being invisible to HOT guys that are out of their league not guys that are average looking and do notice them.

I knew a gay guy who lived in West Hollywood and he lamented to me the woes of living in that gay ghetto and being totally invisible. He was balding, had janky teeth and a "dad bod". He was a West Hollywood 2/10.

I told him to move to West Virginia! The fact that he hadn't been to prison, nor lost all his teeth to Meth would make him a West Virginia 8/10!

He moved to West Virginia and became the Belle of the Ball-- and curiously, slimmed down-- in prison-- but lost all his teeth-- to Meth.

Now he's a West Virginia 7/10!

Mmmyeah.

I was in a Kmart January 2020 and this woman who worked there asked me what high school I went to - I think she was flirting. In February 2020 I was at my health food store standing at the food counter waiting for my order and this slim good looking guy about 34 years old gave me a glance- nothing to go on but then he stared at me again- definitely checking me out- that made my day.

I was 54 years old but since I've started wearing a mask whenever I go there or Trader Joe's , Whole Foods etc I seemed to have become invisible. I can't expect much anyway at my age.