I hated gay bars when I first came out. I thought they were phony, shallow, racist and pretentious. But with the blossoming of gay rights and the internet I thought well it might be better. No bad music ( every gay bar I have ever been played the same sad, disco-ish music. In a straight bar I can here The Eagles or U2 and still meet someone), or bad lighting ,or the mean, hateful looks of internal self-hating men.
But low and behold the internet is worst. If you are honest you never really meet anyone. If you are horny there is no end of fetishes. I have never heard a straight ask a women on first blush if she likes the reverse cowgirl, but I am asked repeatedly within the first five sentences if I am a top or bottom. Then there are the open relationships, the no face picture, and the shameless older men who send their “dick pic” and demand yours. It’s enough to put you off men all together. Do gay men ever realize the cat fishing they commit when they claim they want a conversation but they really want is quick, anonymous sex?