Hello and thank you for being a DL contributor. We are changing the login scheme for contributors for simpler login and to better support using multiple devices. Please click here to update your account with a username and password.

Hello. Some features on this site require registration. Please click here to register for free.

Hello and thank you for registering. Please complete the process by verifying your email address. If you can't find the email you can resend it here.

Hello. Some features on this site require a subscription. Please click here to get full access and no ads for $1.99 or less per month.

Should I go for it?

I’ve been talking to a guy for a few weeks. He just came out at 34, and he’s new to dating. He’s got a kid and an ex wife, though.

Our conversations have started to get a little sexual and me bring me, I’m ready to have him come over. He’s not really my type on paper, but he’s really masculine and plain spoken, so I’m interested. The fact that he hasn’t been with many men (he’s just received oral, he says) makes me a bit hesitant, but at the same time…he showed it to me, and it’s very nice. And I’ve been a good boy this year even through COVID Year Two.

Should I go through with this or should I wait until he gets some more experience?

by Anonymousreply 40July 21, 2021 10:29 PM

Education? Avocation? Transportation?

These are minimum requirements.

by Anonymousreply 1July 12, 2021 11:26 PM

Gurl, you betta get it

by Anonymousreply 2July 12, 2021 11:49 PM

Admittedly, guys with ex wives and young children do not make ideal BF candidates. Especially when the split is still relatively fresh. But really, why wouldn't you go for it? Sounds like you're both ready to move past the flirting stage.

by Anonymousreply 3July 13, 2021 12:14 AM

I am interested in him. Like I said, he has a nice dick, he’s in good shape, tall, seems like a nice guy. Maybe not a laugh-riot, but nice. The thing I’m worried about is having awkward/bad sex with a guy who is inexperienced. Not to say you can’t have that with guys with experience, but I wouldn’t want him to have bad sex with me and he either doesn’t try it again or poof, there goes any chance of a relationship with us.

by Anonymousreply 4July 13, 2021 1:18 PM

I agree with r3, I wouldn't factor a possible relationship into your decisions. Guys with a baby mama usually have a lot personal drama in their lives. He's probably getting comfortable enough with you and at 34 he's likely not going to make a huge deal out of his first time fucking a guy being a little awkward.

by Anonymousreply 5July 13, 2021 1:35 PM

R4 Oh my god Mary, just fuck the cum outta him you fucking whore, are you inexperienced too? Don't date him tho.

by Anonymousreply 6July 13, 2021 1:36 PM

OP, you're over-thinking this.

by Anonymousreply 7July 14, 2021 1:05 AM

Why not? I agree-you’re totally overthinking it. If you’re fantasizing about a relationship, stop. Just fuck him already, FFS!

by Anonymousreply 8July 14, 2021 1:47 AM

If you don't fuck him, we will. 😋

by Anonymousreply 9July 14, 2021 3:39 AM

Tall, good looking, only wants to receive oral and not give?! How could you have reservations about that?! Sounds like my dream man. Lucky bitch.

by Anonymousreply 10July 14, 2021 4:26 AM

Slight update he’s coming over tonight. Even though it’s a weeknight, I’m hungry. Hope it goes well…

by Anonymousreply 11July 19, 2021 4:14 PM

He's entering his Whore of Babylon Phase, OP. Get it now while you still can. His dance card is going to be full by next week.

by Anonymousreply 12July 19, 2021 4:19 PM

He has a brat and an Ex-wife ??


by Anonymousreply 13July 19, 2021 4:19 PM

Miss OP, we all hope that you were able to make a decision about what to have for breakfast this morning.

by Anonymousreply 14July 19, 2021 4:23 PM

R12 Yes, I agree: our OP should meet up with him ASAP! Mr. New-Gay will probably have an extended slut moment soon enough, when he goes wild with freedom after a lifetime of oppression.

by Anonymousreply 15July 19, 2021 4:29 PM

Agree- hit it now.

by Anonymousreply 16July 19, 2021 4:36 PM

If you just want to hook up then now is your chance to get in before the que forms.

If you really like him, step back and let he go through the whole “well I’m gay now I have to get a harness and a plug” phase. He will come back down to earth eventually. Those crowds aren’t for the faint of heart newbies and many discover it’s not for them.

by Anonymousreply 17July 19, 2021 4:44 PM

So, this happened.

He came over with his gym bag in tow. I didn’t expect him to stay over night but he asked if he could. I told him sure.

When he came over he asked if he could take a shower as he had just come from the gym. I let him. Not sure why he felt so comfortable at my place but I’m not complaining.

I offered him a drink, he accepted. We talked a little bit on the couch. I asked him if he’d ever kissed a guy and he said he had. Then I told him to kiss me and he did. We went back to my room, I have him head, got a few blowjob tears, made sure it was a little messier than usual (it being his first time going all the way with a guy). We had some bad porno dialogue going into the actual sex. I asked him “you gonna let me ride it?” and he said “yeah ride that bone”. If I wasn’t already horny and a little dick drunk I would’ve laughed, but in the moment it was music to my ears. So I did. He lasted longer than I thought he would, which was nice.

We laid in bed, had a little bit of pillow talk, went for round two, where he took the lead a bit more. He didn’t last as long and I could tell he had been used to sleeping with a woman. Eh, I still enjoyed it.

Fell asleep, he got early the next morning and left. Hit me up yesterday asking for another sleepover. We’ll see.

by Anonymousreply 18July 21, 2021 3:02 PM

OP's got her turkey meatballs steaming in the crockpot, ready for round 2!

by Anonymousreply 19July 21, 2021 3:10 PM

I'm waiting for the RATING IT troll to post here.

by Anonymousreply 20July 21, 2021 3:14 PM

If you do, please come back and tell us everything.

by Anonymousreply 21July 21, 2021 3:16 PM

[quote] get in before the que forms.


by Anonymousreply 22July 21, 2021 3:19 PM

[quote] So, this happened.


by Anonymousreply 23July 21, 2021 3:20 PM

Came out from where, OP?

by Anonymousreply 24July 21, 2021 3:20 PM

Stick a finger in his butt and then get back to us. Thanks Doll.

by Anonymousreply 25July 21, 2021 3:25 PM

And I’ve been a good boy >

That told me all I need to know.......are you a deserving Daddies Boy?

by Anonymousreply 26July 21, 2021 3:30 PM

OP, I needed a laugh today so many thanks to your little story!

by Anonymousreply 27July 21, 2021 3:32 PM

Be sure to share all of your perverted sexual fantasies with him.

by Anonymousreply 28July 21, 2021 3:33 PM

Good for you OP. I'm glad you went for it. Sounded like a bunch of excuse-making nonsense in your first post.

Good for you.

by Anonymousreply 29July 21, 2021 3:33 PM

He's not divorced.

by Anonymousreply 30July 21, 2021 3:52 PM


Just an FYI. “Experience” means what to people?

I remember being very experienced, yet being a passive or perhaps even a bad lay.

And to be clear, I am absolutely neither, it turns out.

But I didn’t know until much later. Not into porn or sex that is just expressed as porn sex each time. That’s boring to most.

That said, no one taught me how to be a good lay, despite me having multiple partners to which I may have ascribed to the men who were the subject matter or the benefactors or creative partners (lol!) of my gained experiences.

I became a great lay when I finally met a guy who matched my wave length and I, his. And sadly, this is REALLY , REALLY rare to find when dealing with heterosexual hookups between straight women and straight men.

Straight men fit the most part, are horrible in bed, or barely mediocre. Not sure why that is, other than porn and young women who haven’t yet learned how to make themselves orgasm every single time they get laid, if they’re so inspired to do so, is the problem.

Straight men, and by all indications, even gay men, think that having a perfect body and a huge dick are required for great hetero, bi, or gay sex. I’ve had the worst sex ever with the most perfect looking guys.

As far as becoming a great lay is concerned, that only happens when you’re no longer concerned about how you look naked and can really enjoy yourself instead of behaving as if though you’re auditioning for a role.

And the rest is just random discovery and chemistry. Chemistry is the deal breaker or maker. If it’s not there, it’s not going anywhere despite mechanics or lack of inhibition. The good thing about chemistry is that you can build it over the phone, some… but not much. It has to be built face to face for it to truly be there and for some people, it happens immediately and for others who are a bit more cerebral or intellectual, it might take longer, unless their potential sexual partner os just as smart as they are and can keep up.

Interesting that you kinda like ‘em less conversational, OP. Definitely a guy thing, whether smart or not, because really smart women usually can’t get into stupid men, unless it’s a one night stand thingy.

If you’re going for a man who has recently come out and has always only had straight sex or gay sex a few times, he s probably gonna be terrible in bed or is full of shot and has had plenty of gay sex and loved it and will be enthusiastically GREAT.

Either way, be will become better in bed quickly as most men do when they’re actually gay and now are fucking men instead of women they’re not attracted to. LMAO.

You’re doing the Lord’s work OP. Show him how it’s done. Lol.

Too bad most straight never get this teaching moment “opportunity” learning how it’s done. No one tells them either, so there that.

Sigh- straight women aren’t having the hot sex lives they always claim to be having in cosmopolitan.

PS- OP. The ex wife will make your life a living HELL of they have kids. Get ready to rock in roll.

by Anonymousreply 31July 21, 2021 4:02 PM

Leave this man alone (I know you won't).

You said he is not your type on paper (whatever that means). More probative though, you also said you like that he is masculine and has a big dick). Hmmm.. Obviously something is missing. You have not stated you are attracted to him romantically, hell you haven't even said that you like him. I think you are trying to convince yourself that you "should" like him... but you don't. You like the challenge of this straight adjacent man.

I don't see how experience has anything to do with sex IF you like someone. You are just overly horny because of COVID. I recommend that you be this man's friend, stop flirting with him and answer any questions he has about gay life. He needs a friend. Wait a little longer and find someone with dating potential or is at least a good screw(which it sounds like you want).

With you freaking out about his lack of experience, I think you will be disappointed with the sex. An inexperienced top has a lot of potential to be disastrous and an inexperienced bottom can be "messy." Unless you have the time and inclination to do some teaching and investing in moving forward with him (and he is open to that) then you should just leave this man alone.

by Anonymousreply 32July 21, 2021 4:37 PM

A man who comes out late in life = coward and always is unintelligent.

A man with an ex wife and kids = bisexual and will never love you properly like a gay man will and can.

So OP, you shouldn't have anything to do with him, but if you have no self-respect, are desperate, and are into sociopathic bisexual men; go for it!

by Anonymousreply 33July 21, 2021 5:07 PM

r33 gurl please. You hussies will fuck and fall for ANYTHING masculine and hung! That's just the way it is, self respect be damned. So OP might as well get his freak on while he can, cause there will be other whores presenting their holes to the man shortly

by Anonymousreply 34July 21, 2021 5:27 PM

While you should definitely date him, you should also be aware that guys who come out so late often feel that they have to "catch up" and like they missed out on a LOT.

They come bursting out like cockgobbler Aaron Schock and go full gay 24/7 doing all the idiotic stuff we all did during our 20s.

by Anonymousreply 35July 21, 2021 5:29 PM

R34 I have self-control and self-respect even if the guy is extremely hot, masculine, or hung. I will NOT go near a bisexual man unless someone held a gun to my head and forced me too.

by Anonymousreply 36July 21, 2021 5:31 PM

[quote] someone held a gun to my head and forced me too.

Oh, dear!

by Anonymousreply 37July 21, 2021 7:49 PM

OP since you already slept with him, you may as well close the thread.

by Anonymousreply 38July 21, 2021 8:37 PM

This is interesting to me because being men, I'd think that the whole intimacy with possible further expectation wouldn't be an issue either way - like you both could do the do and then watch the game like nothing significant had happened (or went shopping together).

by Anonymousreply 39July 21, 2021 9:01 PM

[quote] Should I go through with this or should I wait until he gets some more experience?

Go for the coin slot - that’s where it’s at

by Anonymousreply 40July 21, 2021 10:29 PM
Need more help? Click Here.

Yes indeed, we too use "cookies." Take a look at our privacy/terms or if you just want to see the damn site without all this bureaucratic nonsense, click ACCEPT. Otherwise, you'll just have to find some other site for your pointless bitchery needs.


Become a contributor - post when you want with no ads!