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“Everybody wants so desperately to MATTER.”

I quoted this from a poster in the ‘Twitter nut and attention-seeker wants kill himself’ thread. I think it’s the plague and epidemic of our times. Feeling and living this way couldn’t be more destructive and debasing. I believe most mental health issues would be resolved if people subjected themselves to the arduous and rigorous task of evolving into a person that truly has NO FUCKS LEFT TO GIVE. Mind you, this does not mean turning into a callous, selfish, egotistical turd; quite the contrary, actually.

Yes, in order to not give a fuck about what others think or feel about you, one must begin by developing a self-esteem, which may at first require self-centered tendencies. However, most people confuse self-centeredness in this process as [italic]others[/italic] making them the center of [italic]their[/italic] world. Additionally, even when they have the right idea about what self-centeredness entails, most people still miss the mark by getting stuck in this developmental stage.

The true mark of someone who doesn’t give a fuck is the acceptance that they are not better or worse, more important or less important, more entitled or more undeserving than anyone else. In a sense, one has to build up their ego - this is, of course, if one does not have an ego that manifests healthily; otherwise, skip to the following step - only to tear it back down in order to arrive at a true and valid self-estimation of oneself, i.e., a healthy self-esteem.

Often this requires much solitude, pain, shedding of illusions, delusions, and fantasies, reconciling with life’s torturous and inevitable rites of passage - namely aging and death - and adopting a brutally honest outlook on life and oneself. Only after one has stripped oneself naked and raw of hubris and transient adornments can one begin to not care in the egocentric sense and expand and care in the altruistic sense.

This is one of the reasons why DL is the only social media platform I interact on: No one on here gives a fuck who or what you are, and, so, it doesn’t interfere with my own current growth process. Plus, I like the generation of humility DL at its best can be conducive to.

by Anonymousreply 1906/09/2021

Everybody thinks that they’re a celebrity in their own lives.

by Anonymousreply 106/09/2021

Calm down gurl.

by Anonymousreply 206/09/2021

R2 lol.

by Anonymousreply 306/09/2021

Social media is toxic and psychologically destructive, and intellectually ruinous as well.

by Anonymousreply 406/09/2021

[quote] “Everybody wants so desperately to MATTER.”

That on its own isn't the problem at all. People want to matter a great deal TO OTHER PEOPLE.

It's fairly healthy to decide that your life and your desires should matter to you the most and to find a way to achieve that without having to hurt anybody else, because - under normal circumstances - people feel bad and guilty when they hurt other people.

by Anonymousreply 506/09/2021

What point is there to life except to matter?

by Anonymousreply 606/09/2021

We're *all* matter.

by Anonymousreply 706/09/2021

Wanting the wrong attention, wanting unearned attention, and not being careful with how I give my attention have been what my problems boil down to. I think this is related to what you're saying, OP.

by Anonymousreply 806/09/2021
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by Anonymousreply 906/09/2021

[quote] That on its own isn't the problem at all. People want to matter a great deal TO OTHER PEOPLE.

But if people “want to matter,” doesn’t that imply that they want matter to [italic]other people[/italic]? I mean, who or what else would they matter to? I suppose one could say a divine higher power, but let’s assume we’re talking about atheists for the sake of my question.

by Anonymousreply 1006/09/2021

Well that's the thing, it's natural to want to be the star and not the audience.

But social media has the effect of making everyone think they're the star and not the audience, which can't be. And people are now angry because nobody treats them like the star they feel they are, which is batshit.

by Anonymousreply 1106/09/2021

Shparkle, baby! And don't shtop!

by Anonymousreply 1206/09/2021

You should kill your self OP. You don’t MATTER. (Capitalizations yours)

by Anonymousreply 1306/09/2021

[quote] But if people “want to matter,” doesn’t that imply that they want matter to other people?

Not necessarily. As pointed out at r5 it's either about a relationship between you and others or you and you where your needs should matter to you more than whatever others demand of you.

by Anonymousreply 1406/09/2021

Thank you ghost of Dr Joyce Brothers

by Anonymousreply 1506/09/2021

I think you’re pretty wise, OP.

by Anonymousreply 1606/09/2021

R13 Oh, love, if only I were that fragile.

by Anonymousreply 1706/09/2021

Keep practicing, hon.

by Anonymousreply 1806/09/2021

R18 I am, I am!

by Anonymousreply 1906/09/2021
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