Can you trust man with a mustache?

Don't like them.

Well, I'm very honest and trustworthy, and I have a mustache.

You asked. It's true.

Liar.

Hate them. They are creepy. Like bowties.

R3

I was laughing so hard that when I tried to W/W you, I hit ff, too. I don't know how I can undo it.

I'm so sorry.

But I really am honest and have hair above my lip.

I love that it makes a man look distrustworthy, like, this handsome guy might actually rape me. . . .

Yes. My husband has one and he looks so much better WITH it than without. His upper lip needs one. It tickles and in a good way.

No. Example? Hitler.

[quote]Well, I'm very honest and trustworthy,

Aren't you modest.

Of course you can!

If a man has a mustache it means he's a dominant daddy top who can fix stuff, likes sports, and tinkers with cars.

Or at least that's what I thought when I first came out...

Well, Eddie Haskell had one after he changed professions. My mother didn’t trust Eddie, and neither do I!

Except for the upthread-mentioned Hitler type, or those thin Zorro-type 'staches, I trust that it means they're hung like a firehose and deliciously dominant tops in bed.

I don’t trust men with a pencil moustache. I always suspect that they have pencil dicks and use one to dial the phone.

You tell me.

I don’t trust a man with a beard.

I don't trust men with blue eyes.

Mais bon, of course you can

No, I don’t trust them; they sometimes camouflage nose hair with the mustache “well, that’s where it starts.” No, it doesn’t.

They often neglect the length to where it’s dipping into their mouths and they’re grabbing it with their teeth. Eating hair is a sign of psychotic behavior. And libertarianism.

Also, it frequently doesn’t match the head hair, so you’re always wondering if they’re dying one and forgetting the other.

Plus, you wonder how many cookies they’re sniffing when there’s a hair turd covering their upper lip.

Oh, and how trustworthy is a shit magnet due to poop spume. They’re scientifically documented to be full of poop - and yet men wear them.

I will say, a mustache paired with twoday growth on the chin creates the most delightful feeling on my taint.

I killed Hitler and then Bigfoot, of course you can trust me.

What weakness in a man's face could a mustache help with? I'm curious why some men opt for this dastardly and absurd facial appurtenance.

It depends, I get weak-kneed for a 70s porn mustache, aka Tom Selleck...

I’ve never kissed a man with a moustache or any facial hair, really. I imagine a moustache smells like their recent meals.

A perfect hipster handlebar mustache can be quite intriguing...

I shaved my mustache once. My partner looked over the top of the novel he was reading and said "Grow it back." The next morning at work, an elder black woman looked at me and said "Chicken lips. Grow it back." I did indeed look like Truman Capote without it and have never shaved it since.

Lest the above sounded racist, she was an elder black woman whom we all loved and respected, in no small part due to her often blunt honesty. When she said "Grow it back" I did so immediately. Loved her.

Sometimes. Theodore Roosevelt, Wilford Brimley, Alex Trebek seemed trustworthy.