i'm having pizza, lasagna, doritos and a hole pot of chilli for lunch

Tell us more about the hole pot.

[quote] ... a hole pot of chilli ...

Freudian slip, OP?

[quote]hole pot

Your hole will be the size of a pot when you’re done with that lunch.

I just had pizza for breakfast.

Your toilet is going to resemble a crime scene.

We know, dear. And then you’re going to take 500 loads from strangers and then you’ll eat 20 bags of Doritos and then you’ll do some more meth and then you’ll think of 28 more ridiculous thread topics to bore us all with.

Within the next hour.

Your husband, lover, boyfriend, manicurist, doctor, ex-roommate and former lover's half dead cat are going to be furious with you and laugh at you as you feint and fall down the stairs.

Clench!

[quote] ... as you feint and fall down the stairs.

Freudian slip for you, too, R7? Since you seem to disbelieve OP's version of events?

But BMI is a fallacy, right?

Sorry, faint.

You know the sound Godzilla makes before he shoots fire from his mouth, OP? That will be the sound of your asshole, along with the splish splash of the mud-water in the toilet bowl.

Hole pot?

Well, that's better than Pol Pot.