Which One Of You Tastefully Pretentious Bitches of a Certain Age Put Your Weekend House On The Market? Part Cinq

Love it

It is nice but lacks personality

I usually like simple, restrained interiors but most of the rooms in this place have all the charm of a doctor's waiting room.

Could be livelier.

This is the house of a throuple that never works out and it’s the fat one with money who puts in all the work. As soon as he pleases husband one, husband two moves away to learn cuticle care in Fresno. Then, Husband one goes back to rehab and moves to Del Ray Beach.

And the jump rope is never used. Use the Jump Rope! Change your life, OP!

I dunno. Are there really any DLers with an antler fetish?

It needs to be messier and must we have the Edison bulb in every room? It doesn't fit the house. I want to see hobnail and Fenton glass.

The exterior promises a ghost.

The interior shows that some terrible Queen has beaten (or painted white) all of the charm out of the ancient dwelling to make it “modern.”

Hard pass.

You know how people look back at 1970s home décor and balk at the avocado colored refrigerators and wood paneling? In 20 years people will be laughing at these charcoal 2010s and 2020s palettes.

I really need to downsize to maintain the nest egg.

A saltbox house. I had to make a model of one of these in 7th grade for American History.

I am not mad at the house. I would totally live there. It would be my dream to live in a Restoration Hardware catalogue, but also a cool looking exterior.

R12, it would be your dream to live in an RH catalog? I weep for gay men with money and no taste. I give a pass to the exterior. It works. The interior is dreadfully dull.

That's fucking beautiful.

I love the little bed in photo 35, it looks so cozy.

Like R14, it is devoid of personality.

Some of it is really nice.

All of it is really faggy.

I don’t ...hate it? While I admire their adherence to the white/black/gray/natural palette IN EVERY ROOM, I need a little color.

Lord help the DL that we can only manage 18 posts on this in 3 hours.

It's a little spooky on the outside, and a little boring on the inside.

[quote]I dunno. Are there really any DLers with an antler fetish?

Maybe not now, but give it a few years.

What about the grounds? Rather important for a summer house in the middle of nowhere.

There a beautiful house under all that horrible grey/ charcoal on the outside. I wonder what it was painted originally?

As for the interior, the only rooms I liked was the laundry, the rest has too much white and more of that godawful grey/ charcoal, and is staged with ugly furniture.

And lampshades - they exist, but not here. I would get some. The kitchen is basically nice though, I'd just add some colour and change the taps and handles for period brass items

Again, the bones are great, and with paint, wallpaper and nice antiques this place could exude all the charm it currently lacks

It’s the tastefully pretentious version of the Raiders-Halloween-bondage blackhouse.

I’m envisioning a comedy in which the owner of the saltbox (Matt Bomer) calls a handyman (Henry Cavill with a mullet) to install an autopsy drain and hidden restraints under the dining room table and the Raiders’ fan shows up. After a series of mishaps, they discover that they’re twin brothers who were adopted as infants by two very different families.

Gut the thing, repaint, and decorate with eclectic charm.

I really like it, but it just might be a little sophisticated for a weekend getaway. I'd like it better as a full time house closer to a urban core

Basically it’s ok. The rooms are small and that may be why it is kept to a minimalist style, although the charcoal color brings the walls in a little too closely. I want to talk more about the outside: a glimpse from the kitchen shows a hill ascending steeply right behind this room, a situation I would be reluctant to consider in a dream home. Heavy rains will course down that hill bringing soil and rocks and potentially a tall tree. Someone has done some rather nice stonework around the property and made an attempt to stabilise the hill and divert water through a manmade waterfall/stream.

Back inside: I really don’t appreciate wooden working surfaces in a kitchen or bathroom. Just far too unforgiving. There is some lovely artwork here and there, for those craving color. Someone else could bring warmth and charm into this house and I hope they do. The shades of spirits past are probably hoping for a little more character, too. Almost 2 acres. Wish the photos showed the grounds.

Its fantastic. Those who are complaining about the color...CHANGE IT. Those who are complaining about the decor...CHANGE IT. FFS, some of you are ridiculous. Post some pictures of the hovels you live in and lets compare.

It was red, r23. Sold for $122,000. Looks like these boys did a lot of work both inside and outside. Current exterior is supposedly green (although a very black green).

Personally I could live without the ridiculous number of overhead lights - ugly and unflattering.

A pair of boys who moved here from Dallas are the sellers.

I'd take it. All the stuffiness could be remedied with new furnishings and a couple of new paint choices to minimize the battleship gray.

Why do pretentious twats not understand the functional concept that dishes stored in drying racks were meant to dry there, and therefore must have a sink or drain beneath them?

Hideous lighting throughout, it gets worse as you scroll through. Looks like they used exterior lighting above the bathroom vanity. No shower curtain or shower door in the pic with the bathtub. I guess they’ve never had guests, or their guests are guys who posted in the do you still shower thread.

Too bad they eliminated the fireplace (there was a chimney on the original red house). At this price point and location, there should be a fireplace. (Gas logs would be fine.)

I agree with the comment on wood counter tops in the kitchen. Such a bad idea. Clearly these guys don't cook.

But with a little different paint, a very nice house. Love the yard and stone.

It's fine except for that deathly charcoal and white color scheme. Maybe someone was trying to create a hard masculine look while evoking the glamour of studio era Hollywood. The only room that really comes to live is that living room with the antlers, which I'm guessing is an homage to Tony Duquette.

Scandinavian and white interiors arent so bad, but pairing them with too much black and gray doesnt work. It feels really cold inspite of all the wood.

Love it, too. But it's staged for the market. And as for that twin mattress in the alcove, I like it, but whoever sleeps in it will hit his head throughout the night on that electric candle light on the wall.

Do I look like I want to spend time in a parody of a Martha Stewart design done in a shack?

My sense of humor does not extend that far.

If it is staged then it is staged poorly. In the room with the two armchairs side by side they are using a plant stand as a coffee table.

The photos conveniently crop out the road - which is literally feet from the right side of the house.

I feel like it’s priced as a “just bring your toothbrush” property - and I know you have to look past paint colour etc. - but so many of the choices (shiplap, Edison bulbs, everything in cold tone neutrals) really make it feel like a 2010s time capsule.

Too modern. It’s classic CT salt box. Some modern touches are fine - but bare Edison bulbs are an absolute no. Not only for the aesthetic - but bare bulbs of any kind are horrible and cold. Classic light fixtures with hats would be nice.

I’d still take it. But one of th enjoys of these old houses in CT is the escape back in time - and away from NYC. Recreating NYC chic in an historic house seems like heresy.

So they tore out the center chimney and fireplace(s) so they could fit in more gray?

R29 that is SO much nicer, thats what I would bring it back to

I cant believe they took out the fireplace and chimney - in a historic house?

Too much charcoal. Otherwise, love it.

Looks like a house the used to hold witch trials in.

OP here. The house is from 1870 and was a Cape until about 15 years ago. the chimney was taken out by previous owners to make the second and third floors essentially not donut-shaped. These owners bought it and just lightly surface renovated it., most of the work was 75 percent done, and they decorated. I want to say it sold for mid 300s when these guys bought it. That it does not have a garage, a fireplace or a pool for this price is laughable to me. Again, more New Yorkers with cash will oh and ahh that it was in a magazine and likely pay cash.

I want it, it's beautiful

Why do you hate the owners, OP? Just because they renovated something with commercial appeal and are going to make some money from it? You could do the same thing.

Who said I hated the owners? I am poking fun at the insane prices people are willing to pay. And frankly, I just don't care for the aesthetic.

Lovely house, well done. Far too sophisticated for those posting here.

R46. I wondered. I would have guessed it was much older.

It's awfully remote. I can't see staying up late at night and watching - say - "Helter Skelter" - on TV.

It would be ok but the low ceilings ruin it for me.

Curious house for the 1870 and mini-New England Saltbox form, but R46's explanation of its previous life as a Cape Cod form makes perfect sense.

It's an attractive house, though, with a strong form externally and some smart decisions internally to make the most of an economical space.

The groaning over the oh-so-finger-on-the-pulse greys and whites is the easiest fix in the world: paint. The strange surfeit of ceiling mounted light fixtures is another easy fix. The location almost on a road, however rural, the low ceilings...these are frequent faults if old houses in New England and nothing can reasonsbly be done about them. For me it makes sense as a part-time home, which makes some of its features easier to live with if lived with less often: low ceikings, the boat style fixed beds tucked away under the sharp eaves upstairs, and the plan. The kitchen is more of a weak point but I don't hate it.

Some of the furnishings anf decorations are annoying but of course they will disappear before the papers are exchanged. (The placement of that Norfolk Island pine on a circular table maybe bothers me more than anything, but not a buyer's problem.)

Simply adding better furniture and bigger, bolder art would go a long way to turning all those neutral greys and whites into background rather than foreground features. It's not a house for me but paint, furnishings, art and it's a handsome weekend or part-time house.

Ill take it!!!

Well, once again---someone with money and likely no mortgage snapped this up. Already gone. These prices seem incredible to me. My house that I will Airbnb, on paper will pay for the new one and will likely pay for another income property while I renovate and maybe sell it to naive people who cannot see potential in things that aren't move in ready.

[quote] Almost no color apparently is allowed in to break this zen monastery.

Sounds like my kinda place.

I like a lot of it.

I'd probably take some of the bedroom spaces or bathroom(s) into either a light blue or light gray to soften the blaring white everywhere.

r46 pools aren't a thing in CT.

[quote]It's awfully remote. I can't see staying up late at night and watching - say - "Helter Skelter" - on TV.

Woodbury is just a few minutes from I-84. You can get to and from the city in about an hour.

!!!!!

R59. Don't talk about things you are unfamiliar with handling. Weekend houses and pools pair well. And at that price, are expected. I live here. I know.

r62 I'm also in CT and pools aren't a thing.

Weekenders in my area want pools. If you don't have one, they make sure that the pool can be placed in a logical place, not disrupting septic and such. Deals have hinged on it.

r64 just because some weekenders have demanded pools doesn't mean pools are all that common in CT.

If a weekend house here doesn't have a pool? All pool contractors will be salivating. I grew up pretty average middle class. Pools were common. I'd say 50 percent or higher had an inground pool. Many had above-ground pools. So, I just don't see your comment as accurate, at least for the areas in Ct I know.

Central and Southern CT. Lots of houses don't have pools.

I live in a Westchester town that borders CT. Pools are a desirable amenity at weekend houses. Locals may go to the town pool or their country clubs but weekenders aren’t interested in mingling.

I called last week to schedule my pool opening and it was difficult to get an appointment before Memorial Day weekend. There is also a chlorine shortage due to a huge increase in new pool installations.

Crazy overpriced. The sellers have way too much faith in their own taste. I preferred it when it was red, for $125,000.

SMELL MISS R62/OP!

Of course there are houses in CT with pools, but it's not a standard feature.

To heat an outside pool in CT you will need a second mortgage.

Don't worry about traffic R39, on that road not much is happening.

Having lived in CT, I'd say a pool would be impractical. I don't see the need for a fireplace either--a lot of maintenance for not much heat. The charcoal works outside but is a bit much inside. Maybe its just teh light and the photography, but they seem to have multiple offwhites inside. The drainage is waht would concern me---is there a basement or crawlspace? You don't want it resting on the ground.

I'd rather buy this.

That road looks pretty damn treacherous.

It's a country lane R76. You'll be fine.

r77 I live in CT and roads like that can be treacherous. Esp. in the winter.

maybe they are color blind. there is nothing stimulating in that house except the 2 pictures of color which actually startled me. I wonder if they are boring people.

Speaking of ghosts as I was reading this thread I jumped out of my chair because out of my peripheral vision I glimpsed a man standing no more than 3 feet away from me and when I turned to look straight at him, there was no one there.

R75: Agreed, it's a much nicer house - in need of some renovations but with a couple handsome rooms and a better house overall. $150,000 in. Are ovation and it would a much finer place.

What is it with DL and pools? Not everyone wants a pool to maintain, or to use.

You know guys; what's great about his spot for those that say they love it -

You know EXACTLY what music they listen to, what websites they visit, what clothes they wear, what hairstyles by which they coif their hair, where they like to vacation, and what company they keep.

And it makes it easy to AVOID these tiresome queens.

No need for a pool, the house at R75 is in a flood zone. However, "Flooding is unlikely to damage this home Based on this home's first floor elevation of 4ft and presence of a basement, this home is elevated above flood damage projections."

R75 that is a MUCH nicer house, even tough it does need some work (declared in the listing). I could live in it exactly as it is.

Ok V8fairy @R83 we'll move in together with GayGermanGuy who can keep the 4 acres under control (he said he wanted to come to the US so I don't think I am being presumptuous in recruiting him).

[quote]Lovely house, well done. Far too sophisticated for those posting here.

It's too trendy, not sophisticated. And the decor is all wrong for an historic house.

Abit 50 shades of grey but very tasteful.

I love the white and charcoal neutral color palette, but the gay artwork of men’s backsides is a bit much. And a bit cliche. You like the male back - we get it.

It's decorated like a lifestyle boutique in a medium sized city's small upscale shopping district.

The anal retentive bowls, here. The color coordinated olde worldy meaningless set of books. These things wound me. This is why they hate us.

Is that a bunch of passementerie hanging on a hook in the kitchen? Does the miss-tress of the manor wear those while cooking, Saturday afternoon, bare assed?

The house is now in contract.

The house looks like the owners used every designer trope that's popular right now and squeezed them into one house. It's way too boring for my eclectic taste, and most of the furniture is right out of a Crate and Barrel catalogue. There's no "art" to the decor.

OP, some people don't want to buy a new home and then have to repaint the entire thing. It's doesn't have to do with having no imagination, but it has everything to do with time and money. I'd ask for a reduction on the sale amount to cover the repainting. If they don't agree, I'd move on.

Owning an in-ground pool takes a lot of maintenance between the cleaner's visits. My realtor told me that houses with pools are a harder sell, as people in that income bracket like to travel, and a pool is just a pain when you're not living there. I've got to admit, though, that when I downsized to a condo, what I miss most from my house is the pool.

The price is outrageous considering most people who would want the home would want the fireplace restored (seriously, fuck this guy for taking the fireplace out, absolute heresy) and to restore the exterior with a more appropriate roof and vintage color. Whoever buys it now will very likely "modernize" it even more until it becomes unrecognizable.

Also, probably unpopular opinion here, but I suspect a lot of these house flippers make sure there's stereotypically gay art in the real estate photos, to reassure the clueless straights that it's okay, a gay renovated it, so it MUST be tasteful.

R93: I'm a swimmer and, yet, when I was house hunting, my reaction to the one house with a pool in the area where I was looking was "get rid of it". I thought of teh mainenance costs, plus it took up most of teh bakyard. The inside of this house also was overdone with too much wood. Someone spent a lot of money, but I dobt they were getting good return on investment.

Judging by the exterior, I expected the inside to be completely hostile, almost creepy. Some of the furniture is nice, like the kitchen table and the two big dark grey - white stripes armchairs and I like the gorgeous wooden floor. Needs some fun and some personality, but it's not as bad as I expected it to be.

The astounding thing to me is the difference in price between OP's house and R75's.: $600,000 more for the slightly smaller house on half the amount of land and slightly more distant from the town.

The much cheaper house at R75 has some genuine historic character, the large granite slabs laid as hearth stones for the dining room fireplace would be enough to convince me to buy it. The wood floors are handsome, there are original details -- it's not an 1870s sort-of Cape Cod turned into an ersatz Saltbox with lots of new plasterboard and millwork where nothing dates from 1870 or even 1970. The cheaper house is on a bigger road, though bigger is relative — and look at the street view, it's a lovely stretch of road flanked by wide areas of mowed lawn and mature, wooded lots with attractive houses and private lanes.

The $600,000 difference between the two properties would more than see to a lot of landscaping, a septic system, a well, restoring the front part of the house and rebuilding the later rear addition of one story into a two story space. The feasibility of the water source and wastewater systems is the big question mark to pin down before purchase; if that's workable, then its a great small house waiting to happen.

The pots that are too big for the shelves. Why?

Litchfield County has some of the most beautiful historic houses in the US. A perfect rural retreat. Oddly it was struggling before the pandemic - but overnight now it’s booming.

Love the original rust red. So much more inviting. Bet the boys who renovated it are emotional chilly bitches. More architects certainly are.

[quote] the boys who renovated it

Someone upthread, who doesn't seem to like them, said they are from Texas.

YOU MAY NOT HAVE A POOL; it’s private well. Aside from tasting sulfur and shit, you’d deplete your well filling the pool.

You would have to pay somebody to deliver water - if they even provide that service in this area and then you’d have to over-treat the water you receive with chemicals in order to prevent stomach bugs.

I tried a hot tub in a town with city well water. The PH was impossible to control and it was NOT the white trash escape that I’d hoped. No floating tray of cheetohs, no boxed wine on the ledge. Awful.

[quote]you’d deplete your well filling the pool.

Oh dear. Someone needs to go back to their HS geology class.

[quote] you’d deplete your well filling the pool. Oh dear. Someone needs to go back to their HS geology class.

Tell us more R103. Are you saying that the well just, well, wells ad infinitum?

r104 water is at a certain level in the ground. It varies but the aquifer tends to run throughout an entire region. One pool-full of water will not deplete a well under normal circumstances.

It's not like a cistern, a finite container that catches rainwater.

Thanks R105. I still don't want an outdoor pool in CT.

Me either. In fact, I don't much want CT.

I got curious and looked it up, and many swimming pool installation companies say on their website that you can use well water for a pool, but there are almost always local requirements about where you can place it relative to the septic and the well. That may be the issue here, the yard looks tricky.

I’d rather suck it up and charm a neighbor with a pool.

I'd rather suck off a charming neighbor and forget about pools.

Are they gay friendly that way?

I made the mistake of having a pool in Litchfield County. Stupid. It’s only USABLE a few days a year. It’s colder up there in the hills. Winter lasts until May and starts again in October. And during the 4 Spring/Summer months, it gets cool at night.

The well water point is crucial too. One of the major hassles I had was the damn well. Keeping it from freezing in the long winter. Creating an effective filtering system - which you were never wholly confident about. I’ll never again do well and septic if I can avoid it.

If you had a pool with that house you’d have to paint the lining olive green and then stick the lichen-covered statue from “Midnight In the Garden of Good and Evil” nearby.