Adult Brady Bunch remake from hell

Heavens, OP -- are you one of those guys that can be clocked from outer space? When you open your mouth, does a purse drop out?

If not, go to the wedding. There's nothing saying you have to be involved with the family after that. This may be your father's last request of you. If it were, could you live with yourself not having done it?

I rest my case.

Just go.

Hopefully, when Dad says, "I do!", your buttplug will fall out, slide down your pants leg, and be followed by a stream of last night's cum.

Problems solved all around.

Go to the wedding out of respect for your father but have a good excuse to nope out of the reception.

You'll earn points for taking the time out of your very busy schedule to attend.

Seriously - I'm afraid I'm going to ruin my dad's day by one of his wife's sons clocking that I'm gay and gossiping about it.

It's best for both of us if I just stay away, right? That way I'm not a problem for them to deal with.

R4 = OP

No OP, this is the time when you behave like an adult. You go home and attend the wedding. You support your dad for ONE weekend in your life. You make nice with your sisters, make conversation with the new wife's sons and their wives. Perhaps you make a toast acknowledging your mom, wish the best to the new family. Stick around for photos.

You leave, head back to your life on one of the coasts after, having made a nice impression.

It all of 72 hours out of your entire life - suck it up buttercup and make an effort. That is what others will remember... the flip side is that everyone else gets to talk about the wedding, the time they spent together and you sit on the sidelines.

Want to stay in the closet with your family? That's your decision, but honesty is a better option over the long haul. If you think one of your sisters would be more understanding or accepting, talk to her AFTER the wedding, when Dad has settled into his new life. Even if you don't come out to everyone, having that one family member to be honest with, is good to have.

OP = DL is not a Therapy site...

Why don't you just come out to them? Let the pieces fall where they may.

bang your new step bros.

You sound hopeless, OP.

We've all had to endure family situations that make us uncomfortable. Going to your dad's wedding isn't going to make you part of this new "system," as you call it.

Just go, be cordial, avoid any conversations that go beyond surface pleasantries, and you'll be fine. It'll make your father happy. If you don't go, everyone will talk about you behind your back. Which would you rather have happen?

You should ask for pictures of his new family before making any decision. Your dad’s fucking around on your dead mom. Maybe you can score some dick off the harlot’s children.

I know it might suck for you but I really think you should go. it’s for your Dad. Go, be there for your dad, be nice to your new family members and then it’ll all be over before you know it and you’ll probably feel better knowing you went. Good luck!!!

Go. Play your role as if you are in the running for an Oscar. Be as pleasantly bland and reserved as possible, then vamoose back home. It will be difficult and awkward for you, but maybe you're over-thinking the part about everyone picking up on your being gay. People probably won't be paying THAT much attention to you, especially if you keep mingling and moving further and further away from wedding ground zero as soon as the vows are said.

JFC OP, it’s not about YOU. Stop making this about yourself for a minute.

The odds are he already knows or suspects, and he doesn't want to talk about it. Your new stepfamily will probably clue in when they meet you, but odds are they won't want to talk about it either, at least not to your face.

This isn't high school, this is your dad's wedding, which ISN'T ABOUT YOU. It's about your dad, and it's not the time to come out of the closet.

So I would recommend going, being as supportive and thoughtful to your dad as you can, be as polite to your new step-family as possible, be on your best behavior and urge them to be as well. Do your best not to talk about your private life, talk about your dad, get your new step-siblings to talk about their mom, and if they make any unpleasant comments say something like "Now let's not ruin mom and dad's special time, this weekend is for them", and "Let's not talk about politics, this is mom and dad's special time". But skip the bachelor party.

Have you been seeing your family in the 18 years since you graduated from college? That's really the crux of how you move forward. You say you're not going to ever tell your dad, but are you planning on seeing him in person before he dies?

I'm assuming yes, and also assuming you have been able to navigate the relationships with your dad, late mom and sisters without the issues of your sexuality, your dating life, your singleness, etc, etc, outing you. I've never come out to my parents -- I'm older than you, and I figure we all reached a mutual internal "don't ask, don't tell" position years and years ago. While most gay guys would consider me a coward, and frankly they have reason to say so, but this is how I chose to navigate my situation.

You have made a similar choice OP, but if you have had any face to face contact with your family in the past decade, just act accordingly going forward. Attend the wedding. Be the Best Man. Make your dad happy. Don't come out to anybody you don't want come out to. In the future see your bio family just as much as you have in the past, navigate the future encounter as you have in the past and don't give too much thought to your dad's new wife and her family, they may or may not be around for holidays, and the may or may not eventually assume you are gay, but as long as everyone is pleasant and civil when face to face who gives a shit what people say when you're not around. Remember, you don't much like them either.

I'm not sure you wanted an honest response, OP. It seems like you don't want to go, and you wanted us to agree with you.

After all, when the first 3 posts said unequivocally that you should go, your response was:

[quote]It's best for both of us if I just stay away, right? That way I'm not a problem for them to deal with.

Did you read those posts?

Be best, OP

If your Dad was a decent human being to you while you grew up, you need to go. Like a previous poster said, this is not about you.

Sure, Jan.

Go. They can speculate even if you show up looking like Ross Matthews in caftan, turban and rings: but unless they catch you with a cock up your ass: innocent until proven guilty.

You've kept them in the closet this long by being able to dodge and evade questions. One wedding weekend won't be any different.

Besides - you're 40 and no girlfriend ever. They're going to talk and suspect regardless - as does your Dad already.

Just go and make sure you're still in the will and that this new church wife and kids don't get shit.

[quote]Remember, you don't much like them either.

R17 — who is in a similar situation — gets to the heart of the matter.

If they don't make an effort to get to know the real you, why is the burden on you to make some announcement they will no doubt be negative drama queens over?

Don't Ask Don't Tell abuses the gay person, especially in families, especially at an event like a wedding — ESPECIALLY at a father's wedding!

[quote]They can speculate even if you show up looking like Ross Matthews in caftan, turban and rings: but unless they catch you with a cock up your ass: innocent until proven guilty.

This is true. I've observed this in many, many Midwestern families over the decades: If you don't say it, it isn't true.

Your child's/relative's mental health be damned.

If this isn’t some made-up story, then you need to grow a spine, already. Good grief you are 40, not 14. Do you wipe your own ass yet?

You sound like an absolute dumb, prissy drama queen.

The question on everyone's mind is really "Can you take a + 1, or did the groom explicitly forbid it to only tell everyone else to bring their current slag?".

Tell them her name is Georgina Glass. She was doing the Lord's work in Africa when she was forced to be quarantined for the past six months.

[quote]I don't want to hurt my dad by coming out.

You're nice OP, not like all of the hurtful gays who harm their parents by refusing to hide their gay shame. You've got your priorities straight.

if you're afraid of your god-loving daddy after 40 years, then maybe your dad isn't as nice as you pretend him to be.

No good person instills fear on their own kid, unless they're assholes.

It looks like you're trying too hard to validate an asshole. Why is that?

I have loving parents but if either of them were assholes of homophobes, religious or not, I'd tell them to fuck off as I did to a rich grandmother I have. I still got 40k from her when she died.

[quote]his isn't high school, this is your dad's wedding, which ISN'T ABOUT YOU. It's about your dad, and it's not the time to come out of the closet.

Yes it is. This is about OP's mental health. Why should anyone put themselves into stress and fear just to satisfy some selfish old asshole?

What a bunch of submissive doormats on this board. Why don't you all suggest OP to lick his father's boots as well?

Gurl....you a mess.

Just go. He wants you to be his best man, and there's a statement there. If you reject him, that's a big statement as well.

That the brothers will analyze you to death is a huge assumption that probably isn't true. They will probably think about you for one minute, and then they will go back to thinking about their problems, or the women they want to bang after the wedding. Find the courage to go.

[quote] I'm afraid I'm going to ruin my dad's day by one of his wife's sons clocking that I'm gay and gossiping about it.

If that happens, it's NOT YOU who ruined the day it's them. A problem they created. Isn't gossiping a sin anyways?

[quote] Just go and make sure you're still in the will and that this new church wife and kids don't get shit.

Please. That church wife Karen has most likely already had the will changed by now. OP and his siblings won't be getting anything. It will all go to Karen and her crotch fruit.

Too many homophobic frau bitch cunts posting on this thread, telling OP to be quiet, stay closeted and coddle his bigot family. OP, you don't need to do your dad any more favors. If he would be so traumatized by your coming out, the best thing to do would be to eliminate him from your life. You don't owe him or his church frau anything. Don't attend the wedding if you don't want to.

Let me ask you a simple question. You are willing to suppress your true self to make your dad happy. If the situation were reversed and you were getting married to another man, would your dad, his church frau or your siblings show up and be polite, civil and friendly? If the answer is no, you don't need to do those cunts any favors.

You have an obligation to attend this wedding, OP.

And you also have an obligation to report back to DL once it is over.

Just don't take a cat to the wedding.

If you haven't come out to your family or father in the last 20 years, OP, this particular weekend is NOT the time to do so! Don't listen to the absolutists who don't understand anything but their own POV, they don't have a good grasp of human relationships.

Again, OP, this event is not about you, and you're not going to be the center of attention unless you're fool enough to make a speech. No, this event about a man who has officially made a peace offering, and whatever you do, respond to the peace offering even if you decide that you don't want to be a big part of the ceremony. Either he genuinely wants a closer relationship with you and to heal your differences, or his new wife wants to. Either is a win for you, so get in touch at least.