[quote] Trust the internet to latch on to a joke and run with it. Britney Simmons, a 24-year-old adult performer, was allegedly arrested on account of assaulting five police officers after an altercation broke out between her and several clients. Simmons, who was reportedly intoxicated, attempted to resist the arrest by allegedly ejecting vagina fluids towards the officer. As reported by World News Daily Report, this left two officers injured and three temporarily blinded.
Amy Poehler's lookalike Britney Simmons trolled for 'squirting vaginal fluids' at cops in Miami strip club
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| by Anonymous | reply 17 | April 8, 2021 1:41 PM |
It's pee.
| by Anonymous | reply 1 | April 8, 2021 2:16 AM |
They’ve weaponized their vaginas! Everybody RUN!!
| by Anonymous | reply 2 | April 8, 2021 2:17 AM |
24?
Damn. She’s ancient.
| by Anonymous | reply 3 | April 8, 2021 2:17 AM |
Not impressed unless she can cradle a mug down there.
| by Anonymous | reply 4 | April 8, 2021 2:19 AM |
Is she part dilophosaur?
She looks like a creepy CGI version of Amy Poehler.
| by Anonymous | reply 5 | April 8, 2021 2:20 AM |
From the article:
She “left two officers injured and three temporarily blinded”.
Girl got WAP!
| by Anonymous | reply 6 | April 8, 2021 2:22 AM |
“Knowing full well that she was exposing police officers to a number of sexually transmitted diseases, and potentially HIV as well, it is considered that she used her vagina with lethal force against the officers.”
If this goes to trial, I can only imagine what the prosecution’s Exhibit A will be.
| by Anonymous | reply 7 | April 8, 2021 2:26 AM |
Another Vagina Thread?....THIS is why I am quitting DL....It's not gay and fun anymore...
| by Anonymous | reply 8 | April 8, 2021 2:26 AM |
She has a poison snooch.
| by Anonymous | reply 9 | April 8, 2021 2:26 AM |
My work is done, R2.
| by Anonymous | reply 10 | April 8, 2021 2:28 AM |
Oh, R8 is going to take his ball and go home! Oh no! What will we do without him!
| by Anonymous | reply 11 | April 8, 2021 2:29 AM |
She's probably more entertaining and funnier than the real Amy. Not that’s it’s very hard.
| by Anonymous | reply 13 | April 8, 2021 2:42 AM |
World News Daily Report is a fake news website.
| by Anonymous | reply 14 | April 8, 2021 3:06 AM |
"I'm melting!"
| by Anonymous | reply 15 | April 8, 2021 4:07 AM |
Yeah they’re the (fake satirical) news version website of the music one MadHouse Magazie. One of my favourite writers/comics writes for them Claudia Comedy. My now ex BF turned me onto her comedy when he saw her put some homophobic frat bros in their place ages ago OFF stage.
| by Anonymous | reply 16 | April 8, 2021 12:31 PM |
How does one catch that many STD's from one drunk bimbo pissing on your cop uniform?
| by Anonymous | reply 17 | April 8, 2021 1:41 PM |