What is the worst song of all time?

I cannot agree with you more, OP.

I fucking hate that song with a passion.

Jefferson Starship, We Built this City

American Pie or Last Kiss as performed by Pearl Jam

YOU'RE HAVIYNG MY BABY by Paul Anka. Horrible, offensive song!

If I Ever Lose my Faith in You by Sting. Or maybe his This Cowboy Song.

It is a tie between Macarena Dance Song and Lou Bega's - Mambo No. 5.

R3 Last Kiss was written by Wayne Cochran, the "white knight of soul". HE was AWESOME!

Convoy.

Thread closed.

Don’t Speak by No Doubt. It makes nauseous.

You Light Up My Life by Debbie Boone. You simply could not get away from it in 1977.

OMG—yes, Wing Beneath My Wing, particular the soppy, quivering, verging on the off tune way Midlers sings it

Hm R9 may have won the thread.

Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer

Seasons in the Sun - Terry Jacks

Somebody That I Used to Know - Gotye

'Those Were The Days' by Mary Hopkins is one of the most nauseating things I've ever in my life. Makes me violently angry!

R3, I completely agree with you about 'American Pie', another abomination that's a close second on my shit list.

Surprisingly, I don't mind 'We Built This City' and 'You're Having My Baby'. 'We Built This City' reminds me of my carefree childhood in the 80s. And to my ears, 'You're Having My Baby' simply sounds like well-constructed, soulful 70s Pop. Admittedly, I wasn't around in the 70s to have it forced down my throat, so I can see how one can have a different perspective on it.

"Papa Can You See Me"

Owns this thread

Feelings- Morris Albert

The Lady in Red by... can’t remember his name.

Vogue.

Sometimes it's not song that's nauseating but the arrangement/production/overwrought singer that makes it unbearable. Case in point is Bette Midler's horrible rendition of 'Wind Beneath My Wings'. The song's a saccharine piece of shit in any form but it was somewhat tolerable in it's original run (6 or 7 years prior to Midler's recording), when people like Sheena Easton, Lou Rawls, Roger Whittaker, Gladys Knight & The Pips, etc were all recording it.

Listen for yourself.

R18, that was another one that was impossible to get away from in the 70s. I'd also nominate Kung Fu fighting, just for the dumbness.

R18, see R23. Morris Albert's 'Feelings' is another song I thought I hated. Then I started hearing what all the R&B artists of that time (Bettye LaVette, Isaac Hayes, Dionne Warwick & Hodges James & Smith, etc) did with it. I discovered that's it's actually quite a nice song with a beautiful melody & cord changes. It just needed a little Soul to put it over.

You Light Up My Life is about the treacliest thing imaginable. You need insulin after listening to it.

Any rendition or version of Na Na Na Na Hey Hey Hey Goodbye.

When fucking GM incorporates it into tv commercials aired many times during a single broadcast it’s downright maddening!

[quote]The Lady in Red by... can’t remember his name.

Chris de Burgh

Old Town Road. Why did that even need to exist?

Stand Back by Stevie Nicks

[quote] Old Town Road. Why did that even need to exist? [quote]

R29, while we're at it, why does a Lil Nas X even need to exist?

Goodbye English Rose...Elton John's hashup for Diana's funeral. Embarrassing and awful.

R32 the dance remix of that being played in clubs at the time was 100% CRINGE 😬

Dl posters' theme song.

whenever I hear “Lady in Red,” I want to scream

Styx - Mr. Roboto - the hit song that ruined their career and justly so.

A N Y T H I N G by Sugar Ray.

R33, just the thought of a "Dance Remix" of that horrible song made me chuckle. I had to look it up and WOW! They'll add a disco beat to anything. LOL. I can't believe it actually got play in clubs!

Kenny Loggins - Danger Zone

"Sugar Shack" by Jimmy Gilmer

I'm getting such a chuckle out of the hate for "Lady in Red." I hate it, too, always have, EXCEPT for one night, one of the very rare occasions when I got high (weed). The song was on a tape or CD someone had, and I remember being moved by it and saying it was so beautiful, and then I put it on repeat. I will LOL forever at the memory.

🤮 so cringe

It's "Papa Can You Hear Me", R17. I can see how some would hate it, but I like that one.

I don't know that it's the worst, but I SPECIFICALLY CANNOT FUCKING STAND "Only Girl In The World" by that cunt Rihanna.

And it's cheesy as hell, R20 & R28, but I love "Lady In Red".

LOL. Well damn it, I kinda like 'Lady In Red' and 'Sugar Shack'. You can't convince me that those songs are as horrid as something like 'Seasons In The Sun', 'American Pie', 'Those Were The Days', etc.

"In the Air Tonight" by Phil Collins -- Oh, Lord, Oh, Lord, the fucking song uses like the same not very melodious line over and over again. It's about the time I mostly (mostly) tuned out popular music on the radio in 80s.

Am I nothing to you?

You can throw that 'Hotel California' piece of shit in the flames while we're at it! Fuck You, Henley & Frey!

You could not go an hour without hearing "Sugar Shack" the last three months of 1963, r44. I detested, hated, loathed, and abhored it. I changed from WABC to shitty-sounding WMCA every time it came on. If for no other reason, I'm grateful to the Beatles for having pushed "Sugar Shack" into obscurity.

I love "American Pie," as well as the French version of "Seasons in the Sun." I wasn't listening to popular radio when "The Lady in Red" was playing.

All I Want to do is Make Love to You by Heart

To Sir with Love is in the running.

No it’s not the end of the world !!!

Ahem.

Something we can all agree on, that Top 40 ode to cannibalism long before Hannibal Lecter.

Feast your ears on: Timothy

That Robin Thicke song where there's some repeated high note or falsetto by sampling (or some singer) every 5 seconds or so in the background, is so disturbing I have to turn the radio when it comes on.

It’s not particularly terrible but For some reason I have always haaaaaated Caribbean Queen.

R30, not today, Satan!

Captain & Tennille's 1976 hit, "Muskrat Love" has got to be a contender for worst song of all time. "Afternoon Delight" (also 1976) by the Starland Vocal Band is a close runner up.

Thankfully, 1976 gave us debut albums by Blondie and the Ramones, so it wasn't the worst year in music history.

I’m Not Lisa followed by She’s Having My Baby

The first ones that popped into my head were "Liquid Dreams" by O-Town and "Queen of My Heart" by Westlife

I'm gonna sit 'God Bless The U.S.A. (Proud To Be An American)' right here. Do with it what you will....

Awful

I used to hate this ALW song

Afternoon Delight....what an annoying, piece of shit song.

R49 I rather like that cheesy Heart song.

🎶Gimme your heart, make it real, ORELSEFORGETABOUTIT!

Can I touch you...there?

The second half is excruciating

r63 = theme from the weekend John-John died.

R60, I didn't want to go there but half of Miss Streisand's catalog should be on this "Worst Of All Time" List. IMO, she was tolerable on uptempo/midtempo numbers when you put a heavy rhythm behind her ('Guilty', 'Enough Is Enough', 'The Main Event', etc) but to my ears those Pop ballads are UNBEARABLE! Something about that "singer", combined with the way she handles slow ballads ('Evergreen', 'The Way We Were', etc) makes me violently nauseous. I've never fully understand her appeal.

I like - love? - Madonna (back then) yet from the first time I heard Like A Prayer it was pure hate. Sophomoric & bombastic! It was unavoidable.

[I'LL] never fully understand Miss Streisand's appeal!

R69, I felt the same way about 'Cherish'. Bland,soulless, milquetoast garbage. Completely out of place on an album in which she was attempting to be edgy.

You forgot this gem.

Disco Duck by Rick Dees; the shittiest song to ever reached the number one position on the Billboard charts.

Fell in Love with an Alien by The Kelly Family. They were mostly popular in Germany where they love this kind of crap

You forgot this gem.

Annie Lennox's 'Love Song for a Vampire'.

Jesus H Fucking Christ, it's bad.

FLLLLY, FLLLLLLYYYY, FLLLLLLYYYY 🪰

Sweet Home Alabama, by Lynyrd Skynyrd.

Gangnam Style

The Ketchup Song. That song is like water torture if played repeatedly!

Whitney Houston was truly a great vocal talent. Because of that, I was willing to overlook a lot of her odd song choices during the first phase of her career. But the self-indulgent, overblown abomination that is 'I Will Always Love You' is unforgivable. And the fact that it became her signature hit is beyond me! Horrible!

SIDENOTE: This song was a saccharine piece of shit when Dolly Parton recorded it as well. But the only time I've ever found it even remotely listenable is during some of Miss Parton's live 1970s performances, because her band was able to add some nice rhythmic touches (heavy drumming, funky bass fills, etc) to it.

R47, don't you dare forget 'Desperado'!

R68 , yes to all of your comments, and especially “Evergreen” which has the stupidest first line, “Love, soft an as easy chair” — written by Paul Williams I believe, and oversung by Barbra.

Another one I hate because it’s so treacly is “Cherish” by the Association. Actually I hated all of their songs. It was a great time for R&B, Motown, rock, folk, pop and even country existing happily on the same radio station, and then an Association song would come on and kill the mood.

One of those middle-aged-parents-at-the-holiday-resort-disco-and-it’s-the-early-90s songs. ‘Agadoo’, ‘Macarena’, etc.

R78, I have to say I like that one, if only because deplorables think it's a Good Ol' Boy Southern Anthem, and it's exactly the opposite.

R83, you made me chuckle because my late mother HATED 'Cherish' and 'Windy by The Association.

This fucking thing. I loved the original but this remake and remix just kills me.

Puttin' on the Ritz by TACO

One Night in Bangkok Murray Head

Am I the only one that cannot stand Bruno Mar’s voice ?

I’m sorry if it was listed already, but I didn’t see that fucking stupid song, Muskrat Love? That’s a turd in the punch bowl.

Call Me Maybe

The Climb

R18 There was one especially horrendous episode of "The Gong Show" where ever contestant came out and sang "Feelings". Jaye P. Morgan and Rip Taylor were probably the judges and every one was sick of the damn song like after the 2nd time, let alone a whole episode. I forgot if they even picked a winner.

Awful

Wait! The coffee shop song! The whiny guy who sings about finding love in the coffee shop! That song is frau panty wetness in aural form!

Justin Bieber - Baby, makes my ears hurt.

My Achy Breaky Heart

Piano Man is the winner. AWFUL.

My name is Michael

I've got a nickel

Shiny and new....

That one where Steve Tyler screams at the end.

That one where Paul McCartney screams at the end.

R93 that was a skit of Mama’s Family on the Carol Burnett show where Eunice appeared on The Gong Show. You are a total idiot.

There are too many awful songs to proclaim just one "the worst of all time." But here are some I consider some of the worst. And they were mostly huge hits!:

:"Jack and Diane" - John Cougar Mellencamp

"Afternoon Delight"- Starland Vocal Band

"We Built This City" - Starship

"We Didn't Start The FIre:, "Movin' Out" - Billy Joel

"Wind Beneath My Wings", "From A Distance" - Bette Midler

"Don't Worry, Be Happy" - Bobby McFerrin

"Kokomo" - The Beach Boys

"My Ding-a-Ling" - Chuck Berry

"You're Havin' My Baby" - Paul Anka

"Seasons In The Sun" - Terry Jacks

"I'll Be There For You" - The Rembrandts

"I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)" - Meatloaf

"My Heart Will Go On", "It's All Coming Back To Me" - Celine Dion

"The Greatest Love Of All", "I Will Always Love You" - Whitney Houston

"What's Going On" - Four Non Blondes

"Give Me One Reason" - Tracy Chapman

"Magic Man" - Heart

'Honey" - Bobby Goldsboro

"Convoy" - C W McCall

"Escape (The Pina Colada Song) - Rupert Holmes

'Ebony and Ivory" - Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder

"Endless Love" - Lionel Ritchie and Diana Ross

"The Girl Is Mine" - Paul McCartney and Michael Jackson

"Muskrat Love", "Do That To Me One More Time", Captain and Tennille

"You Light Up My Life" - Debby Boone

"Papa Don't Preach" - Madonna

"MacArthur Park" - Richard Harris

Why, because hearing "Feelings" over and over again was fun? What's idiotic about that, moron?

I forgot how I hate gimme one reason by Tracy Chapman. Thanks, asshole!

Up Up & Away, My Beautiful Balloon

Lady Bump

"In the Year 2525"

Sweet Suffering Jesus.

My Humps

R98 re. Billy Joel being insufferable, years ago I read this fantastic article (can’t find it rn) that broke down all of his hit lyrics to prove he’s a self-righteous poseur. The mai problem with his songs is that he is ironically self-deprecating, and there is no more annoying human trait than that.

ANNIE - The sun comes out TOMORROW

Kokomo

I Hate Myself for Loving You

>:(

R108 you beat me by 3 mins, that song is awful!

Billy Joel - My Life

You bitches are slipping.

r40, hey, you forgot us!

We Are The World

"I Love You Just The Way You Are"; he could have just written "I Love You Stupid As You Are", same meaning based on the rest of his song.

Billy Joel Still a woman to me

Lynda Carter I’m still a woman to me

Sweet caroline by neil diamond. HATE it!!!

R108

This is worse

R117 LOVE Just the way you are, didn’t it win the Grammys ?

Rhinestone Cowboy

Strangers in the night/My way, dunno which is worse?

This horrible piece of crap by Sting, Rob Stewart and Bryan Adams.

Greatest Love Of All by Whitney Houston

I believe the children are our future....BLECH!!!!

R102 has compiled a pretty credible list but a lot of these hardly qualify as worst songs of all time. Many listed are just songs that have been over played or were unjustifiably popular.

Elvira- Oak Ridge Boys. Do not open the link if you are on a mobile device, as there is a good chance you will destroy it in order to stop the song

That Mariah Christmas song. At least it’s once a year.

Kenny Rogers - Lady

Love the beeping sound effects

I hate Bette and that song, but if you think that is the worst song of ALL time, you're just seeking attention or bored and couldn't come up with a good example for your thread.

It's Evergreen by that cunt Streisand and that vile midget lol

Say whaaat???

Yeah, that Titanic song by celine dion is just awful

Party All The Time. Eddie Murphy

I’ve Been to Paradise, but I’ve Never Been to Me

R124 I remember working at a bookstore about 10 years ago and they played that song ALL. THE. TIME. during the Christmas season. Needless to say, I didn't make it after the Christmas season.

Killing Me Softly With His Song - Roberta Flack

Sususudio.

Thats a thread closer!!!

Hated this

Bad Touch - Bloodhound Gang

WTF! 371 million views on YouTube

R8 Shut your mouth! I have CW McCall's The Real McCall and I'm not ashamed to say it. Wolf Creek Pass is a delightful ditty, I tell ya!

Friday

Tardy to the Party

Cringe earworm, awful video

"Ebony and Ivory" because of its provenance.

Sorry Not Sorry - Demi Lovato I actually have to get away from it.

Tarzan Boy. Baltimora.

Ours!

R119 backyard garbage wrestler Jon Moxley’s drunken tweaking karaoke-serenade of ‘Sweet Caroline’ sung to a bewildered frightened crowd made me a reluctant fan. It’s grimy trashy insanity that is somehow sweet and silly at the same time.

"Happy To Be Stuck With You"--Huey Lewis and the News....Don't even me started on that one.

"The Long Run" by the Eagles--Perhaps the most boring sentiment ever to be expressed in song.

It’s My Life. Dr. Alban. The only song to go from tampon ad to club hit to charted single

R140 ‘The Ballad Of Chasey Lain’ is amazing, though.

‘Uhn Tiss Uhn Tiss Uhn Tiss’ is also kind of fire. Beneath the toilet humor and vulgarity, they actually did have something to say about the hypocrisy of pop music & culture at the time.

R136 what lmao? It’s not even a Christmas song, and I don’t think the movie it was attached to was a winter holiday release either (it was that Brat Pack version of the ‘Three Musketeers’, with Kiefer).

As a closeted fan of Bryan Adams and The Police/Stewart Copeland, I am so ashamed of that song’s existence. I pretend I don’t know who’s singing it if it comes on the radio or tannoy.

I forgot about Neil Diamond! Lots of bad ones for him...

America

Hello

Cracklin’ Rosie

Ok, I simp for Blur and I think 90% of everything they ever put out was misunderstood genius, but the lads ought to have been viciously slapped for ‘Boys & Girls’. Those grunting retarded Neanderthals off of Oasis were actually right for once in their damning criticism of it.

These two. Oy.

No Corey Feldman yet?

R119 = Yankee fan

“Don’t Worry, Be Happy”. A piece of shit.

R157 he’s the BEST what do you MEAN. So much entertainment bang for buck. ‘Something in Your Eyes’ is a strong song, too...

And how can I forget “AsCENshun! MilLENiUM!”

What does the fox say?

Cut my life into pieces, this is my last resort.

MacArther Park

Complete nonsense.

R163 MacArthur Park is the musical equivalent of a Ross Hunter Universal International melodrama film. Overwrought, but perfect when I want high melodrama.

Mississippi Squirrel Revival.

I think we're done here.

A different Bette Midler song — From A Distance. The words are ironic, about how God (if you believe in that claptrap) is just a passive observer as people struggle, but she sings it in the most treacly, overwrought way possible instead of with the disdain such a scam calls for.

Waylon Jennings’ version of MacArthur Park is surreal

Whoa R166! You just hit me with a brick of unexpected nostalgia. I forgot that song existed, and now I remember we were forced to sing it in choir at school.

Another school choir fave.

99 Luftballons

Who let the dogs out

Single Ladies

I win.

"We Are The World." An absolute piece of shit. So is "Do They Know It's Christmas?" And "Happy Xmas (War is Over)" by John Lennon and Yoko Ono. All those songs are supposed to have some great "meaning" to them but they're all pure garbage.

Scoopity Poop

I CAN'T STAND the song Neil Diamond sings the contains the lyrics - LOVE ON THE ROCKS - ewww.

Watermelon Sugar by Harry Styles.

Note to self: Never let DL see my playlist.

Poopy-di scoop

Scoop-diddy-whoop

Whoop-di-scoop-di-poop

Poop-di-scoopty

Scoopty-whoop

Whoopity-scoop, whoop-poop

Poop-diddy, whoop-scoop

Poop, poop

Scoop-diddy-whoop

Whoop-diddy-scoop

Whoop-diddy-scoop, poop

"If the Russians Love Their Children, Too," by Sting.

Madonna, Music. God, that song was terrible. Not as horrible as Cher's Believe but definitely up there. And I'm a Madonna fan! It was arguably her worst single until Bitch, I'm Madonna was released.

Pop That Coochie

"SoouuuuuuEEEEE are never ever EVER getting back together...' Instant migraine. I have to leave a store if it Is playing. That braying!

I live in the hinterlands and one year "She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy" played constantly in stores and pickup trucks racing to and fro and made me homicidal.

"The Lion Sleeps Tonight" makes me *suicidal*. Hideous song.

John Cougar's "Jack and Diane" is the all-time worst, but runners-up include Eddie Kendricks "Keep On Truckin'" and Diana Ross' "Love Hangover" neither of which are even actual songs. And let's not forget the dynamic duo of treacly, repetitive saccharine...Climax "Precious and Few" and Joe Cocker's "You Are So Beautiful".

Sugar Ray's "Every Morning there's a Halo ..." Ugh! If Kato Kaelin had had a music career ...

'Lady' by Kenny Rogers. Fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!

'You Don't Bring Me Flowers Anymore' gave us all the vomit-inducing shenanigans of Streisand's most saccharine ballads COMBINED WITH the sappy cheesiness of Neil Diamond!

'I'll Never Get Over You Getting Over Me' by Expose - LOL. I have no idea why this piece of shit started running through my head a week ago, 28 years after the fact? (PTSD maybe?) Maybe not a worst of all time, but definitely one of several low points in early 90s Top 40.

Hootie and the blowfish, such a BORING band! Only wanna be with you is their hit. Terrible song!

R185, no self-respecting Gay would ever diss Diana Ross' 'Love Hangover'. She's recorded her share of bad material but 'Love Hangover' isn't in that category. That groove is LEGENDARY! I think you need to have an appreciation of R&B, Funk & Disco Music to fully get it.

Admittedly I say this as someone too young to catch it during it original run on the charts/Top 40 Radio. So I wasn't hit in the head with it 24/7 for several months straight.

Cheesy af

"You're In Love" by Wilson Phillips.

The WORST

Surely there's a place for the fake hippie, tree-hugging travesty that is 'I'd Like To Teach The World To Sing' in here.

Some of those songs posted above, like "Convoy" and "Kung Fu Fighting" had some character. I wouldn't call them the worst songs. But this is a subjective situation.

Baby Im-a Want You (Bread)

195 replies and NO ONE has said "Come on Eileen?!!!" That is one of the worst songs ever. I know all our Brits are going to disagree, but i really was confused why that song was played so much during its popularity.

This piece of shit:

Muskrat Love. I mean, there's some weird songs, and I get it, I don't actually mind it. Some weird silly 60s and 70s nonsense. But somehow this one, WTF? Why? Why do you exist Muskrat Love? What terrible moment brought you into life?

Agree r196. I don't want to admit it, but I like quite a few of the songs mentioned. I am not a tasteful friend, I guess, at least for music.

The Captain & Tennille sang "Muskrat Love" at the White House for the visiting royals. Charles liked it. The Queen thought it was inappropriate.

Where's your mama gone? Far, far away

Charles liked it. This makes me fear for the monarchy more than a thousand Markles. This is terrifying.

R185, now if you want to discuss Miss Ross at her worst, we should be discussing 'Endless Love'. Unlistenable! And again, that damn Lionel Ritchie (Sappy Ballad King of The Late 70s/Early 80s) was involved.

And I'll be damned if that fucking Mariah Carey & Luther Vandross didn't drag us through the mud all over again 10 years later with this piece of shit!

My Humps

Watch out, A-Rabs! Toby Keith's gonna put a boot up yer ass!

Oh! I really like Wind Beneath My Wings.

Obviously it's schmaltzy slop designed to sell the movie but I guess I'm in the minority.

but not alone r208

No. The worst Diana Ross was "Working Overtime". Diana doing New Jack Swing is like Lawrence Welk doing ska.

I don't think you Americans had to suffer this one.

It broke all records and became the best selling (UK) single of all time.

I'll just leave this here

What If God Was One of Us by Joan Osborne.

This is pretty atrocious.

Lots of good choices here but the winner by light miles is Tomorrow which was already mentioned. I saw Annie in previews at the Alvin so it was the first time I heard the score and that song made me hate the entire show, The sad thing is I like a lot of Adams and Strauss. So why did they go and write the most diabolically evil song of all time?

& this you WILL know...because USA radio played it back to back....you'd hear it everywhere, droning in the background

Everything I do I do it for you......

The worst Madonna song:

I like "On My Own," Patti LaBelle & Michael McDonald.

R108 & R206 , I remember the first time I heard 'My Humps', my jaw actually dropped. I couldn't believe how idiotic & pedestrian it was. One of the reasons I started turning away from Top 40 and embracing my love of 60s / 70s "Oldies" & Jazz Standards.

R205, hard to believe that song spent NINE WEEKS at number one on the Billboard charts.

Richie was the black Barry Manilow of the 70s/80s. All of those ballads sounded the same ...Still, Truly, Three Times A Lady, etc.

R218, you fucking called that right! LMAO!

This musical abortion:

R214, I liked the groove & campy gayness of 'Work That Body'. LOL, It's not to be taken seriously. It probably was something fun for the Aerobics / Discorobics (it really was a thing) crowd of the day.

I joined with R219 in overriding "On My Own." That's a very good song, especially when compared to, say. . .THIS:

I hate Dancing Queen

somehow I knew we would get to blasphemy r226

[quote] My Humps

I hate the song too, but have a new found respect for it ever since Utica turned it into a Halloween song!!

Some of these are repeats, but dammit if they don't deserve it!

Glory Days- Bruce Springsteen (Fifteen minutes of "Well alright!")

Kokomo- Beach Boys

Don't Worry, Be Happy- Bobby McFerrin

(Those last two make me want to rip out the speakers.)

We Didn't Start the Fire- Billy Joel (If this song drives me to commit murder will I be convicted?)

Love Shack- B-52's (Jesus! My senior year of high school, this fucking thing was everywhere! Still is!)

Anything and everything ever recorded by Rod Stewart or Hootie & the Blowfish!

This one

All the other pretenders can go home:

Sheryl Crowe's "I Wanna Soak Up the Sun." Really bland, shitty song.

That awful song "It's ironic"

The worst Christmas song:

R232, isn't everything Miss Crow ever recorded "bland & shitty"?

Hotel California. I hate this song so much.

Not while that fucking Paul McCartney shit still survives, r234.

I had forgotten how bad McCartney's solo career was until tis thread

I prefer We built this city to Nothing’s gonna stop us now

R234, believe it or not this was a big hit one Christmas. It's much worse.

Whitney Houston's cover of "I will always love you", mainly because of the deafeningly loud and endless replay. I still enjoy the Dolly Parton version.

OP it's in the top ten with this.

R234 This post is taking me down the most traumatic memory lane.

Betty Davis Eyes and Total Eclipse of the Heart deserve mentions here. Come at me bro about those two.

This, but fortunately few have heard it.

Thread is now ready to close and be hermetically sealed.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ But not until you hear Melanie revive her 1972 disaster 48 years later on New Year’s Eve, 2020. I guess anything to pay the bills. Sad.

How bout this gem?

Thank to all who contributed above so far. I agree many of the songs listed are horrendous, but there are lots there that I actually love. I just created a little “DL despised” playlist to get me through my “workfrom home” day.

Obviously, Barbra, Bette, Whitney and Neil Diamond feature heavily!

“Both Sides Now,” Joni Mitchell. Ugh!

Summertime, by Nocera. The Accent is so thick, I thought it was a parody or novelty song.

I've always hated this song. Alanis, Paula Cole, Meredith Brooks, Liz Phair Sarah McLachlan. All shit.

R249 Same. Imagine my surprise when I go to add abhorrence #112 to my Spotify playlist only to find it was already in there.

Anything by The Carpenters..

No idea why the DL elder gays swoon over that shit. In the same wretched category as The Captain and Tenille.

Dire straits Walk of life. That Titanic song. My heart will go onnnnnnnnnñn and oñnnnñnnnnnnnnn and fucking oñnnnnnnnnnnnn

R84 you have to be British, right?

With the exception of “Cool” everything from Gwen Stefani’s solo catalogue

The '70s music thread reminded me of how much I hated "I'm Not Talking about Moving In" by England Dan and John Ford Coley.

Cheryl Crow's "All I Wanna Do". I fucking hate this goddamn song! It makes me want to fly into a rage.

R211 Holy Shit, I was scrolling through thinking "I'm gonna post that goddamned bagpipe Paul McCartney monstrosity" and you beat me to it.

I'm an American, but my father was transferred to work in Stockton-on-Tees, we lived in Hartburn Village in the late seventies, and THAT MOTHERFUCKER was played incessantly. I couldn't believe it - it made my ears bleed.

I also remember a commercial jingle/song for some beef broth oxo cubes thingy that went to #1!

Did that actually happen British friends? Or am I just hallucinating?

^ and while my family lived in U.K. we laughed ourselves silly when this came on Top of the Pops

the way they say BOOOOOGIE and there somewhat indecipherable accents made us giggle

^their

R256 for my sins, I am, yes. Did you Yanks never get ‘Agadoo’, then?

I’ll add football (well, soccer to you) World Cup songs. Almost all are universally horrid, but I’m nationalistically obligated to know them and be able to sing them on cue.

R198 ‘Come On Eileen’ is a classic traditional reel, and something of a pub song. It’s easy to sing, memorable, raunchy, and has a raucous-peasant feel to it.

It’s also defiantly youthful, and has a touch of meta about it (it’s a song, that references taking cues from a song playing on the radio).

In your heeeeaaad. Zombie, zombie.

It's close to the best song; just stop it.

Dl never gets good work and outstanding Leistungen, tiring.

Paul McCartney's "Coming Up." Sounds like it's sung by HAMSTERS. Unbearable.

R65 Hey Jude is Heaven, probably my favorite song of all time.

Many of these I hadn’t ever heard and can’t believe are real!

American Pie.

Can't STAND that thing.

Wet Ass Pussy

OP, I'm with you on this. My 8th grade class (Catholic school) had to sing this as part of our graduation ceremony.

Can’t stand Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen ( or indeed very much by Queen at all).

Islands in the Stream is like nails on a blackboard. I don’t get why it was such a big hit.

Only Elder gays will remember Walter Brennan warbling about his pal (bedroom toy?) Old Rivers.

[quote]Only eldergays' grandparents will remember Walter Brennan warbling about his pal (bedroom toy?) Old Rivers.

Fixed.

For me it’s a tie between, “Horse with no Name” by America or “I’ve Never Been to Me” by Charlene.

Although, “Wildfire” by Michael Martin Murphy is vomit inducing.

R269 But did they run out of words towards the end ?

[quote] With the exception of “Cool” everything from Gwen Stefani’s solo catalogue

That’s my least favorite song of hers / No Doubt’s. The song verges into cringe territory. The lyrics, quality of her voice, ugh.

Plus "Love Hangover" has the "Looking for Mr. Goodbar" pedigree. But I agree on godawful "Endless Love" from the endless movie "Endless Love", as Bette said, aka "Tuneless Love". Just puke.

Hmmm...I thought I was the only gay man in creation who doesn't like "Love Hangover." It's by no means my "worst song of all time," but my eyes would roll back in my head every time it came up on the Ninth Circle jukebox.

"I Wish I Was In Dixie's Land"

Stars are blind by Nazi Paris Hilton

Hoo hah

Soccer Practice by Gay Pimp

285 responses and no-one mention The Super Bowl Shuffle?

Chow mmmmmein

R263, I’m Australian and sadly we did get Push Pineapple Grind Coffee on AM radio rotation for years.

I am so pleased England didn’t make the finals with that insane “It’s coming home” hype. Anything to wipe the smirk of David Baddiel’s face.

The best World Cup song was Nessus Dorma by the Three Tenors though credit due, Ricky Martin did knock it out of the park with The Cup Of Life.

*Nessun “Oh, dear!” Dorma

I agree with pretty much everything on this thread, except I like Cracklin' Rosie because the lyrics are messed the hell up, and I also like Susudio, even though it's just a downmarket Abacab.

In penance, an offering: "Easy Lover" by two Phils, one of whom should have known better.

This Stevie Nicks corker about Chimpanzees

The worst song of all time is any song that was really popular that I didn't like.

A few years ago I read an article in ROLLING STONE magazine and a similar one in some other magazine in which the authors attempted to identify identify the most disliked pop songs of all time. WE BUILT THIS CITY was # 1 on one list and # 3 on the other. Evidently the song went through multiple rewrites and lyricists and arrangements, including Bernie Taupin. Ultimately, I think, Grace Slick said she just wanted to have a number 1 single and make lots of money from it regardless of whether it was good music. A few of the players and lyricists have since distanced themselves from the single. (I guess Marconi really does play the mamba).

I think WE BUILT THIS CITY is a bad song, but for me the worst song of all time is COME ON EILEEN by Dexy's Midnight Runners. "Toora Loora Toora Loora Lye! Are hearts in mono our mothers cried sang along who'd blame them we are far too young and clever"

I hear it at least once a week, either at supermarkets or the gym or in elevators. I've never understood why it was / remains so popular. It's mostly indecipherable and that awful video with the overalls. And the few lyrics in English make no sense,

A lot of these crap songs bring back fond memories of my teenage years before I became a jaded cunt.

Hot Problems

Two creepy songs.

"In the Summertime (when the weather is hot)." Mungo Jerry.

"Brandy, You're a Fine Girl." Looking Glass.

Not the worst song ever but I have a seething, irrational hatred for "Our House."

"Two creepy songs."

Why is "Brandy (You're A Fine Girl)" a "creepy song? Because the guys in it says "what a good wife you would be?" That's just drunken sailors talking. I think "Brandy" is one of the greatest pop hits of all time

I hated that awful Sheryl Crow song "All I Wanna Do." God, it must have been played a million times? And it sucked! By the way, she took credit for writing it but she didn't. What a cunt.

Hey, Jude.

[quote] Why is "Brandy (You're A Fine Girl)" a "creepy song? Because the guys in it says "what a good wife you would be?" That's just drunken sailors talking. I think "Brandy" is one of the greatest pop hits of all time

IMO, it's mostly the lyrics being cheesy. "My life, my lover, my lady ... is the sea." We all have different tastes. I can see why ppl do like the song. Just having some fun here, I hope.

I like when they talk about his “raging glory”

Sympathy For the Devil is hell!

This piece of shit is the schlockiest "song" ever created...

R304, good one!

Muskrat Love.

Covered by America and most famously by The Captain and Tenille.

"At This Moment" by Billy Vera and the Beaters. It was a ghastly song but it became a huge hit due to being featured on "Family Ties." It was the "love theme" of Alex and Ellen. I guess some idiots thought it was romantic. But it always made me want to puke.

You're the Inspiration

This bitch could out-whore, Charlene!

Wow what a turd of a song

R303 the Guns N’Roses version of ‘Sympathy For The Devil’ is a guilty pleasure, if only because it plays out Tammy speeding away with a dying Christian Slater in the final scene of INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE.

"I like when they talk about his “raging glory.”

Actually it's the OCEAN'S "raging glory": "Brandy used to watch his eyes when he told his sailor stories; she could feel the ocean fall and rise; she saw its raging glory."

Oh I thought the lyric was “his” raging glory lol

That Allstar song...hey now your an all star...puke..

ONJ and a Beach Boy

Pet shit boys - let’s make lots of money. It’s used in that stupid assed All State insurance commercial to the point where I curse my TV every time it comes on.

I don't think Brandy is great, but it's not the worst.

If not [italic]the[/italic] worst song of all time, r318, "Brandy" is certainly in the top 10.

Gaylords

Can novelty songs ever be the worst songs?

I love Brandy. We should have a thread of songs that made this list but that you love. I'll also include American Pie. Loved it as a boy and still love it today a million years later. How can you not love Karen Carpenter singing Ticket to Ride?

[quote]How can you not love Karen Carpenter singing Ticket to Ride?

All you have to do is listen.

R277 is correct!

In case the tykes here need a purge. "Wildfire" is quite reliable for that.

Be near the loo.

I own this this thread!

"If not the worst song of all time, [R318], "Brandy" is certainly in the top 10."

You're crazy. I can't remember seeing "Brandy" on ANY "worst songs' list. You just don't know a great pop song when you hear it.

Butterfly Kisses, saccharine super Christian song. My oral hygienist scolded my mother for not liking it when it came on when she was cleaning her teeth. I guess she & my dentist were fundie Xtians.

Many people assume the vocalist of Brandy is black and are surprised to find out he is white.

The Shaun Cassidy version of Da Doo Ron Ron

Anything by the Osmonds

Not in OUR hands you don't, Yoko.

Wonderful Christmas Time by Paul McCartney

R329 = Helen Keller. This performance its PACKED with charm.

Well to this day I had no idea Brandy was sung by a white man.

Barbie Girl by some horrible electronic group in the 90's.

And no, I don't really care what their name was.

Pure shit.

Can't believe nobody has mentioned Muskrat Love by the Captain and Tennille.

Any song boy galling circa 1977 understands the charm of Shaun Cassidy. I didn't learn I was gay from him but he certainly confirmed it. Still does.

Again, i knew someone would chime in that "Come on Eileen" was some great song that people would sing along with especially at pubs. I still hate it.

And someone else after me confirmed it and also voted it the worst song too.

Today, I'll vote for Faith Hill's "This Kiss." This damn song was playing at the grocery store yesterday and I still can't get it out of my head.

Speaking of shitty teen idols

Might have been better if he changed the lyrics to Let HIM in

R335 meet R55, R90, R102, R200 & R306

Seriously, r339 - NO idea why this guy was considered a teen idol/heartthrob. Along with Shaun Cassidy.

Dashboard Light.

R339, 'When I Think Of You' is fairly decent, laid-back California Pop. You should have linked Mr. Garrett's biggest hit; the far more offensive 'I Was Made For Dancin'!

That godawful Paul McCartney song "Wonderful Christmas Time."

As was explained at R23, sometimes it's not the song, it's the arrangement that's bad. Case in point; I LOVE Delaney & Bonnie Bramlett's original version of 'Groupie (Superstar)'. They wrote and recorded it as a tough, Soul/Rock midtempo number. The immediate cover versions by Cher, Collen Hewitt, Rita Coolidge & others kept that same spirit and were enjoyable.

Then along came those fucking Carpenters who rearranged it "Streisand Style" and stripped the song of absolutely any Soul it once held. And unfortunately that's how it's been performed every since. SMH. The Queen of Schmaltzy R&B, Luther Vandross even had a hit remake of it in the 80s that was even sappier than Karen's!

They really fucked up what was originally a good tune!

The Phil Collins version of You Can't Hurry Love. Awful and unnecessary. Yet somehow, this piece of shit song has something like 350 million streams on Spotify!

R329 The Osmonds had great songs!!!

He's a dancer.....but not much of a singer

Yuck

Didn't Leif talk about having been forced to sing live somewhere and being pissed and embarrassed because he couldn't sing a note at the time?

Candy Man, the Sammy Davis one.

I can’t stand LET IT GO

yes, I hate that song from Frozen as well

How dare you r355? Xtina has never been part of the worst of anything. Seriously.

A little bit Alexis

Christina Perri - A Thousand Years. My doctors office has had this on their playlist for the last 5 years. It drives me insane when I'm in the waiting room.

Panic! At The Disco - High Hopes. Similar situation, my grocery store has had this song on their playlist for several years as well. I fucking despise this song.

Well that's the first time I heard something good about Henry Kissinger.

How about this 80's doozie?

R360, good choice

Didn't Philip Michael Thomas also release a shitty single?

In retrospect, "Party All the Time" (Eddie Murphy) was the best of the '80s celebrity offerings.

I love Eddie Murphy. What a cutie. Sexy ASS man.

This song is like a hammer to the head.

R360 I’ve heard worse. It’s not bad for the time.

Almost any song that has Sheryl Crow's name on it qualifies.

f363 i call that song "Potty all The Time"

My asshole belongs to daddy

Don Johnson is nice to look at.

He's got a purdy mouth R370. Who was he?

Cher performing Superstar, it really is a totally different song than the Carpenters' version. It's more bluesy/horny than heartbreaking/sad.

R372, the Cher rendition of 'Superstar' that I referenced at R346 was recorded with the famous Muscle Shoals studio band and can be found on her 1969 "3614 Jackson Highway" LP. If I'm not mistaken, it may have also been a single. All pre-Karen Carpenter.

But yes, IMO La Cher captured the writers' original intention/mood better than KC did. It's about a tough/hardened groupie chick unexpectedly falling in love & actually believing what sounds like frivolous pillow talk.

Don't confuse the muddy waters with cher and the worst song of all time. Cher has sung a lot of shit. And many consider her to be a shitty singer. Cheap talent. Bad taste. But she's not the worst at anything.

Ummmmm, R374.....we were actually giving Cher her props and saying how she had a better grasp on 'Superstar' than Karen Carpenter.

Cher deserves no such props R375. So your point is what? Cher has no grasp on any song. She has a heavy vibrato and lidded eyes. She did have an emotion infused vocal timbre and style. Some mistake this for something deeper. Cher ain't deep. I doubt that she understood the words to most songs she sang. She was once incredible looking. Later she became a bit better singer. Now she is neither.

R363 I loathe that song with ever fiber of my being.

"Thanks For My Child" is one of the few songs that can bring me to tears.

Most overly sentimental slop like "Wind Beneath My Wings" does nothing for me emotionally. But certain songs bring out the corny cheeseball in me, and that's definitely one of them. Something about the purity of the sentiment and her voice.

Every aspect of this song is horrific, yet it apparently was a huge #1 hit in England.

I struggle to comprehend how the country that gave the world some of the greatest music in modern times is the same country that went out and bought this in droves, unironically.

Can somebody from the UK please explain what you were thinking?

The Cheeky Girls - "Cheeky Song (Touch My Bum)"

the hell?

R379 Brits have a semi-ironic affinity for Eurotrash, an appreciation for raunch, and a love for camp. It was bound to happen.

Let’s not forget too that The Cheeky Girls had a 2000s Christmas hit that is still played every December all these years later.

Tragically, they went into obscurity shortly after that single, and popped up in 2010 doing an awful amateur act on BRITAIN’S GOT TALENT that was skewered by Cowell. It was a bit sad and pathetic to see them try to recapture a magic that had gone and snatch another fifteen minutes of fame, but the Girls took it well and didn’t seem to care.

We are reminded in a separate thread that "Oops!...I Did It Again" came into being 25 years ago today. It is steeped in all manner of worstness.

“Everybody’s Talking” by Nilsson. Terrible song from a terrible movie,

Through the Eyes of Love, the "Love Theme" from Ice Castles

i'm flashbacking to the 80s - something i prefer not to do

that one that went "Take these broken wings..."

R386 How weak! You suck!

R386 oh, well, call me trash but I always quite liked ‘Broken Wings’. The keyboard motif that plays it out is haunting and quite disturbingly lovely...

[quote][R386] How weak! You suck!

Bizarre response I don't even know what you're talking about - but then i never went to school in The Valley.

I honestly love you by Olivia Newton John. Puke

[quote] Cher deserves no such props [R375]. So your point is what? Cher has no grasp on any song. She has a heavy vibrato and lidded eyes. She did have an emotion infused vocal timbre and style. Some mistake this for something deeper. Cher ain't deep. I doubt that she understood the words to most songs she sang. She was once incredible looking. Later she became a bit better singer. Now she is neither.

And that's your opinion, R376. I just so happen to see past the "lidded eyes", long tresses & Bob Mackie costumes to notice an occasionally effective Song Stylist who has performed several songs with deep conviction. Whether she was truly sincere or not, I don't know? But occasionally she's sounded like she was.

And I repeat, Cher indeed had a complete grasp on (writers) Bonnie Bramlett & Leon Russell's original intent for the song 'Superstar', a goofy, cock-drunk groupie who made the mistake of believing frivolous pillow talk. Cher got it!

“Everybody’s Talking” by Nilsson. Terrible song from a terrible movie,"

"Midnight Cowboy" is a terrible movie? You're an idiot. And "Everybody's Talkin" is not a bad song at all, although I could have done without the "wahwahwahwahwah" part in it.

This song by him is 10x worse

Afternoon Delight. Fucking cornball song.

R393, Nilsson had the world by the balls in 1972. He had a huge hit (Without You) and followed it up with two of the strangest singles ever (Jump Into The Fire and Coconut). Almost like he wanted to sabotage his own career.

there's an anti Nilsson troll on DL - he was very much a presence in my life in the 70s - I don't like listening anymore - it might come back, I hope so.

There's a good documentary about him...see link

actually listening to this makes me think I can get into him again.

Billy Joel - We Didn’t Start the Fire

Do They Know it’s Christmas Time at ALLLLLLLLL

So this is Christmas and what have you done....

war is over if you want it....

Harry Nilsson was John Lennon's drinking buddy during his "Lost Weekend" days. There's that famous photo of him with Lennon and May Pang; Nilsson is swilling down a "milkshake (a Brandy Alexander)" and looks three sheets to the wind, while Lennon is gripping Pang's neck and sucking her face. They were both such assholes. But there's a funny story of how when Nilsson met Yoko she was her usual grim faced self and he said to her "What do you want me to do Yoko, suck your cock?" That even got a little smile of stone faced Yoko.

Nilsson was quite a character. There's a documentary about him, "Who Is Harry Nilsson and Why Is Everybody Talkin" About Him?" It's supposed to be pretty good. Nilsson died of heart failure at the age of 52.

Nilsson got a lot of mileage out of a career of two hit records.

I don’t think anyone cares enough about him to be a troll. The documentary is interesting, though.

[quote]There's a documentary about him, "Who Is Harry Nilsson and Why Is Everybody Talkin" About Him?" It's supposed to be pretty good.

see R396

[quote]Nilsson got a lot of mileage out of a career of two hit records.

He produced a lot of good songs and albums - he wasn't just about hits. he was A LOT more than that.

He was a drunk - much of the documentary is about the 'hilarity" and destruction of that - WOW! Harry was a CRAAAZY! drunk bullshit.

Personally I find nothing more boring than "drunk" stories - the music side of the documentary is great though.

"Tomorrow" from the musical "Annie."

Virtually any song by Train makes me want to slit my wrists, but this one in particular—I would slaughter nuns if they stood between me and the button to turn it off. I fucking hate this song!

I like a lot of Madonna's singles, but Like a Prayer is the most boring/overrated song ever.

R408 I always hated Prayer, the lyrics are so stupid, & I’m a huge Madonna fan. Today out of nowhere, i remembered the song Unskinny Bop by Poison (talk about bad lyrics)

anyone mention Zombie yet? by the cranberries. I heard it today and just fucking hate it!

Easy Lover is actually a banger. The song has great bones on it, and the two Phils harmonise as well as the BeeGees or the Beatles.

The synthy production and the Phil Collinsness is what makes people thinks it’s worse than it is. If it were sang by, say, Aretha and Annie Lennox, music critics would be over it like a rash.

R411 yes, I’ll second that defence. ‘Easy Lover’ has a crunching guitar, thunderous drumline, fascinating alluring rhythm, and some superb melodic vocal work. The way the tempo slows, and then races, then slinks back again, without losing the groove....magic. It’s one of the most interesting radio-friendly pop-songs Collins ever worked on, and I say that as hipster scum who is a fan of early Genesis.

"Physical" by Olivia Newton John. A huge hit and it was absolutely terrible.

Train is so bad, they make Maroon 5 seem like Metallica.

‘Stairway’.

Treacly, asinine, condescending madrigal.

Not the worst, it's trippy and I actually like it, but "Legend of a Mind" by the Moody Blues just popped up on my shuffle. I remember as a kid thinking it was so deep, man. Now I laugh to hear them going on and on about some old guy of Irish descent who took a lot of drugs. It's just silly.

To wit: "Timothy Learyyyyyy.......Timothy Learyyyyy......."

R398 Simply having a wonderful Christmastime! (Surely posted already.)

R373 It's a bit histrionic but I like Bette Midler's "Superstar" best. She sounds so broken.

R418 I fucking LOATHE that piece of shit song! It makes me want to slap everyone around me viciously.

I’m a huge Carpenters fan, but Calling Occupants of Interplanetary Craft is awful. If aliens ever visit us & we were to play them this as a greeting, I think we’d be vaporized on the spot!

"Simply Having A Wonderful Christmastime" is a bad CHRISTMAS song. That's a separate category. There's a Bad Christmas Song thread every holiday season.

Steiny just snuffed it, so I suppose his God enjoys fromage.

There was this Brazilian punk musician named Supla who was sort of a Billy Idol wannabe. He'd been in a somewhat successful band in the 80's called Tokyo, and then went solo.

He didn't have a great grasp of English, but that didn't stop him from writing and recording this monumental piece of shit in 1998.

I can't think of a set of lyrics that make me cringe harder than this.

Forgive me for introducing this to anybody who doesn't know it.

Supla - "Green Hair (Japa Girl)"

"SHUPERCALIFRAGILISHTICEXSHPIALIDOCIOUSH"!

Becauseh the lyricsh are sho tongue-twishting!

R135, that song was playing on the Sirius 80’s station about 30 minutes ago. I lol’d. It’s a pretty bad song 🎵.

....

Listening to a 70s radio station I heard an ancient song, "I've Got The Music In Me' by Kiki Dee (real name: Pauline Matthews). It was a terrible song, but it was evident that she was a very talented singer. Her only major success was a duet with Elton John (she was an artist on his record label Rocket Recods) that awful 'Don't Go Breaking My Heart." God, I HATED that song. It was so trite, such a nothing, such a dismal musical trifle. And it was a huge hit. To this day I cannot stand hearing it.

I agree R428. For some reason Kiki Dee rarely recorded material worthy of her talents. She had her moments though. Early on in her career she recorded an excellent 60s Psychedelic Pop number called 'On A Magic Carpet Ride' that's since been rediscovered and become a fan favorite, 50 plus after the fact!

Her (self-penned) song 'Sugar On The Floor' is pretty damn good as well. Even though Etta James covered it and sang it even better.