Theatre of Blood 2021 remake

Coral Browne in the hairdryer has to be the most scary death scene ever!

So they replaced campy old queen Vincent Price with a right wing bigoted Christian Gary Oldman.

It'll be much gorier I'm sure. But Oldman is an odd choice.

Link please OP

I wonder which one is the critic forced to eat his own dogs (please let it be Hugh Grant!)

Hmmm, I adore this movie. Looking at the cast listed for the remake, I'll allow it, with some reservation.

R5, it was implied that critic was a bulimic (brain fog has deleted the term for people who eat so much, then throw up so they can eat some more) so I’m going with Stephen Fry. Plus, it would be fun watching him get his fat face stuffed.

That makes sense R7; I kind of like the idea of old, self important Brits like Grant, Branagh & Laurie meeting a bad end, but why Cate Blanchett?

She'll be playing the Coral Browne role I guess R8

Gary Oldman in the Vincent Price role will be as exciting as Kenneth Branagh as Poirot.

Dear God, who thought it was a good idea to give Gary such a deliciously campy role?

Do you have a link to this? I can't find any info on it.

Where did you hear this op?

April Fools lol

Just my dream cast for the remake.

Stephen Fry would be the Robert Morley "straight man" with the poodles. Cate Blanchett would be the bitchy Coral Brown part. Granted, Cate Blanchett could play Poirot and it would be a good performance. Hugh Grant would be the Robert Coote drunken role- who dies in the barrel of wine. Hugh Laurie would be the Dennis Price role- gets dragged by a horse. Simon Callow would get his head cut off. (Arthur Lowe in the original). Kenneth Branagh would be the Jack Hawkins-life murdering role. Benedict Cumberbatch would play the womanizer (originally Harry Andrews). Ewan McGregor would be the Ian Hendry critics board chairman. Timothy Dalton would be the first murder- like Julius Caesar (original the great Michael Hordern)

Am I delusional? lol

OP I read your original post to my husband and he said "I'm guessing that's an April Fool's Day post"...alas, he was correct. But I like your cast very much!

“Hello, I’m...Butch.”

Nicholas Hytner could direct!

Anyone want to finance this project with me?

Hey they could get Kenneth Branagh to direct. His recent remakes have been ever so exxxxx....zzzzzzzz snore zzzzzzzz snore.

I just saw this on tv the other day. Never heard of it. Really had some good moments.

R19 It is a great film that showcases Vincent Price's talents. He always wanted to perform Shakespeare but his horror movie reputation never let him be seriously considered for a Shakespearean role. This film allowed him to show off his classically trained talents all the while being a "horror actor."

Look at the cast list, too. They are all serious classically trained actors. Michael Hordern is ranked as one of the best Lear's of the 20th Century. Jack Hawkins was in the greatest ilms of all time- Lawrence of Arabia, Bridge on the River Kwai, and Ben Hur. Harry Andrews, Dennis Price, Robert Coote, and Robert Morley all had extremely impressive resumes at the time as well.

For Price to kill them all as a "horror actor" makes it even better. To me at least. I'm a nerd though.

Oh FUCK YOU OP for raising my hopes.

This is Your Dish

Well this would have been the perfect rehabilitation vehicle for Armie (I want to eat you) Hammer.

When Gary Oldman cuts loose, he can be campy. Please, see [italic]the Professional[/italic] or [italic]Romeo Is Bleeding[/italic]. The danger is that he takes himself a bit seriously these days.

In other news, I just streamed [italic]the Faculty[/italic] via Paramount. If you want funny teen horror, check that out. The cast includes Bebe Neuwirth, Elijah Wood, Famke Janssen, Josh Hartnett, and Robert Patrick, among others.

Why all the hate? Who would you recommend for Lionheart? Daniel Day-Lewis? Colin Firth? Maggie Smith? lol

[quote]In other news, I just streamed the Faculty via Paramount. If you want funny teen horror, check that out. The cast includes Bebe Neuwirth, Elijah Wood, Famke Janssen, Josh Hartnett, and Robert Patrick, among others.

How dare you relegate two time Academy Award nominee Piper Laurie to"among others" status. Really now.

R26 I think she also guest starred in an episode of Frasier with the lady from The Good Wife?

I'm so ready for this

Yeah, ezcept its NOT HAPPENING, R28. Learn to read.

This is one of my favorite movies from childhood. I know some schmuck tried to make it happen as a musical a few years ago but they just didn't have the talent to pull it off.

[quote]Yeah, ezcept its NOT HAPPENING, [R28]. Learn to read.

Yes, this was fake - but since they're recycling every other tired idea, why not remake this movie & some of the other VP campy classics for Netfix, Hulu or one of the other million streaming channels?

Armie could play the police inspector