Once celebrities become celebrities, are they ever capable of organically making friends again?

Depends on the kind of celebrity you are talking about. Someone of Oprah's caliber? Probably not. But someone low-key like Kevin Bacon? Entirely possible.

I've never seen so many celebs palling around with each other, mostly online. Weird combos like Drew Barrymore and Samantha Guthrie??

They become friends with other well-known actors, it seems. Makes sense: Those people aren't going to stan out on you, and they understand the crazy life you lead.

I heard that class lines, more than race, determines who you become friends with. I would say that celebrities can make new friends, but the new friends would have to be wealthy.

Mostly with employees

Often with other celebrities who are on the same level as they are.

Go to mosta celebrities twitter, they could have a thousand responses and will only address the celebrities.

[quote] Mostly with employees

People who only or mostly hang out with their employees -- that's a red flag to me. Employers who give bonuses involving group activities ("We're all going on a cruise together!") ... why? If I were ever so lucky to have a few loyal employees, I'd give them ... CA$H.

[Quote] I mean, like, someone you met at a party who you hit it off with and fostering a genuine friendship.

I think it's possible, but it doesn't happen very often.

I think the only celebs who can make genuine friends are the kind of celebs who aren’t the Hollywood type. Those who choose smaller Indy projects and shy away from the giant high school situation that is show business. It’s a bunch of vapid clicks. If you want a real down to earth existence then you have to find a home away from LA and only get a crash pad there for work.

No. They have flunkies, sycophants, and useful peers.

There are no friends in Hollywood.

Oprah could befriend Dolly.

Oprah could not befriend you.

Like seeks like.

[quote] It’s a bunch of vapid clicks.

Oh, dear.

Bump

It’s called show business, not show friends

They can be friends with equally celebrated people in a different field, because one of the benefits of being a celebrity means you can get access to other celebrities. EG, Mick Jagger is a lifelong cricket fan. He has long time friendships with certain famous cricketers.

Not necessarily friends, but I read that Beyoncé went incognito a year to travel. No hair and makeup. And she looks basic without it. She had normal conversations with strangers that didn’t recognize her. I think being famous would be horrible and lonely. Think of how many seem miserable despite being rich and idolized.

No i don't believe they can. Think of elder celebrities who are done with their careers. Who are their friends now?

Of course it is possible.

I am friends with someone oft spoken about on this board. We met at a Sauna in Berlin (naked equalizer) and began to talk about food. He had a passion for cooking and I invite him to my house for dinner (no sex kids) we had a great time and when he was leaving town he told me he had to get back to work....oh what do you do? And then I learned but there was already a bond and we keep in touch and have spent a lot of time together between projects.

After college and the early part of your career, you can only be friends with people of your own level, whether it is money, status, or talent.

I am my own best friend!

By definition a celebrity is someone who's not in a position to live an authentic life. Even if you're psychologically well balanced you're surrounded by climbers, con artists and the delusional, so you can never safely let down your guard.

And America, that man’s name (from R20) was none other than Joe Piscopo.

And now you know the rest of the story.

Wrong R24, I do not even know that name.

It would depend on the degree of fame and how easily recognizable they are.

For someone at a Brad Pitt or Beyonce level, I suspect it would be very hard, unless the other person was also famous in their own field. They are rarely, if ever, in a situation to meet a "regular" person.

Plus there's the constant being on guard from stalker fans and just general people gawking.

Awww,,,that’s sweet R25. Joe will appreciate your discretion.

Celebrity professions tend to promote transient lifestyles during which you don’t stick around the same people and places on a consistent basis. Plus, many people, celebrity or not, tend to make fewer new friends the older they get.

[quote] I read that Beyoncé went incognito a year to travel

I want to know more about Beyoncé’s Lost Year

Actors/actresses have to know what they're getting into it. Especially the ones who live in LA. I just don't buyit when they complain about fame, the paps, etc.

OP it depends if they've got their head screwed on properly.

I know one who has certified sales of more than 23 million albums and 2 million singles. She has her head screwed on properly and doesn't fall for her own publicity or industry bullshit and has plenty of normal everyday people in her life. Often they become good friends with other celebrities who are in the same boat.

I agree. Only the ones who actually think they're on some level of humanity above regular people only associate with other famous people. In other words, the crazy ones. And they're usually the ones who fall the hardest once they get to the top.

r10 L.A is far, far, far, far more sociable than NYC...

IMO, the need for fame (and the reassurance of that fame still existing) wipes out the need for friends.

They need fans, not fiends. No matter how down-to-earth their narrative might be.

Well, nobody needs fiends, R33.

The level of desire and commitment it takes to achieve and maintain fame is intense. I don't think that kind of drive allows for non-transactional relationships.

They'll be "friends" with people who can do things for them.

I know a celebrity that is a former Olympic athlete that also won world championships in their sport. A person that cares for each person they meet, considerate, loving, empathic, and with a good sense of humor. It’s surprising that they are so nice, they also do commentating for their sport and spread the positive energy. This is a person that always remembers peoples names as well.

In contrast, there was a tv writer hosted by my college and we had to transport the guy around. He was terrible, constantly hitting on my female friend. We didn’t want to ride in a car with him he was so annoying.

ALL of my friends are organic.

Most of them don't have real friends.

A friend of mine (not at all famous) who lives in LA and works for a company in the film business always uses the same adjective to describe most of the people in Hollywood & the film biz: “gross”.

"It’s a bunch of vapid clicks."

"Oh, dear."

To be fair, we are on the internet.

LOL R36, those are not "celebrities' in the sense that they are well-known to just about everyone in a manner that would make everyday friendships difficult

They can go places and no one will recognize them, the TV writer in particular.

But if you are Brad Pitt or Jennifer Aniston, it's a whole different playing field.

I knew a guy who definitely wasn't famous, but was an aspiring writer and he became best friends with River Phoenix at the height of his fame. I never met River Phoenix, but through the guy, I met his sister and his twerpy, annoying teenage brother who was annoying as fuck at the time (and grew up to be Joaquin Phoenix).

Someone like Dave Chapelle who lives on a farm near a village with 4000 people in Ohio surely must be friends with ordinary people. He moved to Ohio to get away from celebrity.

Madonna must have oodles and oodles of meaningful friendships

Not every non-celebrity is obsessed with celebrities or the money they have.

I doubt it, they just become more self centered and obsessed with more wealth, and become greedy. I really don't follow any celebs, and I get tired of hearing about all the 50-100 million dollar real estate transactions by them...who gives a fuck? Tax extreme wealth, back to the 1970's level.

I became friends with a musician (indie) who was starting to get big 2007. She was cool, smart, quirky.

I had to distance myself as her fame grew. As her fame grew, her personality soured. Friendship became one sided. She was busy and less available- which I understood- but when we did get together it was allllllll about her. To be kind, she did try to include me in parties that had other fame-y people at then. She didn’t become a monster. Just totally preoccupied with her career/image.

We now text a few times a year and that’s it. I could never begin a friendship with her at this point. I’d have no access, as we met long ago at her humble day job. And, I wouldn’t like her if I met her today.

Don’t want to name her (yes I do)….but she has been described as an “indie guitar loop princess from the PNW”

I do not give a fuck about celebrity lifestyle. You shit and wipe your ass just like me.

This is a bit OT, I remember a thread somewhere on DL where a poster said they knew someone who had been friends with Nick Offerman and that Offerman ghosted the person after marrying Megan Mullally. I suspect this happens quite a bit, people get well known in the entertainment business or marry someone well known and they ditch some or all of their friends pre-fame and then just become friends with other celebs.

R43 I believe Dave Chappell is from Ohio. That's why he lives there. He said it's quiet and peaceful there.

A lot of really big names like Beyonce Elizabeth Taylor Oprah Barbra Streisand & Michael Jackson. Lived & live very insulated lives behind high fences. People like them do not go to the grocery store or pharmacists or even banks. They're so wealthy that they have whole teams of people that take care of things like that for them. You're never going to just see them out and about, that's just nit the kind of life they lead.

They're more isolated and remote than most celebrities are. Those are the types you'll have a hard time reaching and meeting. And if you do get close to them. You won't be able to firm a friendship with them. They have lots of handlers around them and people protecting & standing around watching and listening to everything.

It would be like trying to start a friendship with the Clintons Bushes Obamas or Bidens. It would be impossible to make happen. Unless you make some type of video that goes viral and they decide to reach out to you and meet you like Michelle Obama did a few years ago with the little Black girl. Other than that, you're out of gas. Those people are heavily protected by the system & no ordinary every day person is going to get into that world, unless they themselves end up becoming famous too. And sometimes it happens and you end up becoming one of them. But you gave to really want it, in order for it to happen.

I work in LA in a business-adjacent profession and can tell you that for the most part, nope, for the most part, the really big ones don't have people they call friends. They complain about it constantly but at the same time, they never let the people around them forget who they are. And they never seem to stop making insane demands on their so-called friends.

That kind of fame makes crack look like an amateur drug. Very few people can handle it; for most, it sends them into a place that is barely recognizable as human.

However, there are a few of these Big Names who actually manage to keep their ego in check and have genuine friendships. In fact, probably the nicest guy I've ever known is Jon Stewart, married to a wonderful, down-to-earth woman, and always considerate of those around him. And there are others. But it's rare.

Don't get me started on Colbert though. Sigh... Or just about any comedian outside of, believe it or not, Adam Sandler. And yes, the rumors about Ellen, all true.

Sure they are.

Not everyone is out to use them or scam them.

Believe it or not, there are specific social circles in Los Angeles and NYC, where celebrities are around non-celebrities, and after a while, everyone is pretty much on equal footing, and there are genuine social situations, where people make friend with each other, celebrities or not.

Celebs are human beings. They go through the same shit everyone else goes through.

No one is a “God”.

People are people, and once you get to know someone well, who also happens to be famous, all of the celebrity bullshit fades away, because they’re absolutely no different than people who aren’t celebrities, yet are facing the same challenges and issues, non celebrities face.

R53 Just with a whole lot more money on hand!

Celebrities don't have friends. They generally have "user" personalities.

R55, some definitely do. I agree.

They may think they have friends, but it's not what normal people would recognize as friendship.

Probably not.

I used to know a celebrity pretty well in the 90s, and to this day, all of her friends are from way earlier in her life before she was famous, mixed in with a very few fellow famous people, but barely any of them really.

[QuotePeople who only or mostly hang out with their employees -- that's a red flag to me.

True but it happens all the time. Ava Gardner's best friend for decades and at the time of her death was her maid. It's like this for so many of the huge celebrities. Your best friend is on the payroll.

Careful what you wish for, boys.

Those excerpts from Alan Rickman's diary seem to indicate the only people that registered at all with him besides his wife were other celebrities.

[quote]True but it happens all the time. Ava Gardner's best friend for decades and at the time of her death was her maid. It's like this for so many of the huge celebrities. Your best friend is on the payroll.

Why, there's a plot for an entire movie in that idea!

[quote] I mean, like, someone you met at a party who you hit it off with and fostering a genuine friendship.

How often does that happen in “real” adult life either? Hardly ever. Sure, you may strike up a fun conversation with someone at a party, and event or bar, and may even swap contacts “omg we should totally stay in touch “ - and may actually intend to do so in that very moment, but of course you never do.

It’s incredibly hard to just “chat someone up” and make new friends as an adult, period.

They can meet others at parties and invite them to dinner at their homes but they're never sure if this person is genuine or just another hanger-on. It's all very peculiar.

I'm good friends with an actor who isn't really famous (she's very much a working actor) but was a regular on (at the time) the biggest tv series on cable. She left the show in a planned, but kinda shocking (but to be expected) way and it was a sci-fi/horror show, so she's a staple at comic-cons and has a legion of faithful fans (easy hint: zombies).

I could see her either blowing up or just continuing working hard as a character actor. But I'm 99% confident she'd keep her childhood friends close to her. We don't live in the same city anymore, so I haven't seen her in years. Talk to her online all the time, but I think we'd still be friends. We aren't "let's take a vacation together friends" (she's a married mom, I'm a single guy with cats) but I think we'd still be good friends. I mean I've known her since she was like 12, so it's someone pretty close.

R52, get started on Colbert. Teach us something. Enlighten us.

I have a friend, probably my best friend, we’ve known each other for about 40 years. Still speak most days. For the last 20 years or so he’s been best friends with someone who blew up big, due to a number of cultural moments (some of which they continue to recycle), and is pretty much at the apex of showbiz. They are rich and have a ton of awards. Over the years, I assumed they were genuine friends, especially given the origin of their friendship and that they knew each other and worked together before the other’s meteoric rise. My friend mentions them, fairly frequently, and I’ve always felt a sense of privacy (and frankly, a lack of interest) and have never really inquired about them or their personal business. I just listen. It seems like my friend is included a lot, vacations with them, works with them, etc. All of which is good for them.

What I never realised, until recently, is that it’s a very different kind of friendship. For the first time ever, I asked my friend if they could ask the celebrity for a favour - because, frankly, it just seems like what people do and a rare opportunity to move forward and possibly open a door. It’s not even a big favour, more along the lines of a referral to another party that I can’t think of another way to make contact with on my own. My friend immediately agreed and said they would do everything they could to help. It’s been about 10 months now and what it’s revealed to me is how conditional their friendship is, how negotiated and precarious and not at all casual but seemingly very calculated, with an undeniable imbalance. It is definitely very compartmentalised, one might say “one-sided” though not without generosity.

The other thing that’s clear is that once someone is a brand - perhaps even more so than actually financially successful, though that comes - they can just continue to churn out mediocre shit on the power of their brand. And where once they may have been motivated by passion, after a certain amount of success they just continue to pursue it, for no other reason than BECAUSE THEY CAN. It’s one of the reasons there is such a glut of shit in the culture.

R66 it sounds more like your friend is just uncomfortable with you using him/his friendship with the celeb for connections.

I’m friends with a moderately successful actress. Think a supporting actor on a network crime series. She has a terrible time making friends outside of the people she grew up with. Everyone is looking for a connect or using her for clout.

Huge stars even have strange relations with family members they've known all their lives. The dynamic changes once the STAR becomes famous and wealthy.

I know the nicest guy in this situation. He's become like the Pope of the entire family. He's put many family members on the payroll out of kindness and trust. But it's odd how family vies for his attention. These are not normal interactions.

[Quote] Or just about any comedian outside of, believe it or not, Adam Sandler. And yes, the rumors about Ellen, all true.

Not the first time I have read that Adam is nice and Ellen is practically satan.