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Catholic confirmation

I’ve been dealing with a lot in my family recently, and faith has surely helped me deal with these situations. I’m definitely Catholic, as I’m trying to remember prayers, attending Mass on TV every Sunday, occasionally on weekdays. With COVID lockdown, a beloved and sick family member currently ill from a botched surgery. I have not had my confirmation, the second Catholic sacrament. I am 24 — and gay. Is it wrong for me to go about getting confirmed because of my sexuality? The following sacrament is marriage, yet is of course optional. I appreciate you all taking the time to look into this for me.

by Anonymousreply 145March 1, 2021 11:19 AM

OP, this sounds like a matter of doctrine, so isn't it a question for your priest? Isn't he the one who should be "taking the time to look into this" for you, rather than a bunch of laymen on DL (or anywhere)?

by Anonymousreply 1February 24, 2021 8:58 PM

This thread could get good.

by Anonymousreply 2February 24, 2021 9:00 PM

Don't tell the priests that you're gay.

by Anonymousreply 3February 24, 2021 9:00 PM

It was bad enough I had to my communion due to parents. I drew the line at confirmation, stopped going to mass (except for special family occasions), and haven't looked back at any of that ever since.

by Anonymousreply 4February 24, 2021 9:04 PM

OP maybe try to find a Catholic parish that accepts gay people.

by Anonymousreply 5February 24, 2021 9:06 PM

R1, I’m just wondering if there are other Catholic lgbt members that have felt well doing it. R2 — I may talk about it with a priest, but I genuinely don’t want to get fondled by one or something. Not exactly going about asking about doctrine, just seeing if I should continue, or if I’m genuinely wasting my time getting confirmed, as I’m apparently going to hell!

by Anonymousreply 6February 24, 2021 9:07 PM

That’s a good angle R5 , there has to be one somewhere nearby. I deal enough with homophobic family members and parents.

by Anonymousreply 7February 24, 2021 9:08 PM

There are many many gays in the Catholic Church. What do you need to talk about? Get all dressed up in your finest and get confirmed.

Don't tell the priests you're gay. They already know it.

by Anonymousreply 8February 24, 2021 9:16 PM

Find a Franciscan priest, they are non-judgmental. St Francis Church in Manhattan has an LGBT outreach.

by Anonymousreply 9February 24, 2021 9:18 PM

I went to Catholic grade school, middle school, high school, preparatory school, and a Benedictine College. In all those years, I know of no priest or nun that taught anti-gay anything.

I’m not a practicing Catholic (and wasn’t then really), but what Catholic school taught me was how to think and had a look at problems, incorporating ethics and morality in my decision making. For that I am extremely grateful.

I am well adjusted, married to my man of 23 years and reasonably happy. If I put away the religious doctrine, Catholicism taught me how to think, and how to be a human being.

by Anonymousreply 10February 24, 2021 9:20 PM

[quote]OP maybe try to find a Catholic parish that accepts gay people.

Good luck with that.

by Anonymousreply 11February 24, 2021 9:24 PM

I went to Catholic school for 9 years but am not Catholic. I am not Catholic, however.

OP sounds like he or she is seeking comfort through a difficult time. Going to mass, etc., I agree, can be comforting. However, I would disagree with going lock, stock, and barrel on this. I would consider confirmation unnecessary. You can take what's useful to you about the church. There's so much about the Catholic church that is hard to swallow.

by Anonymousreply 12February 24, 2021 9:24 PM

OP - if you have faith and get something out of it take R9’s suggestion & find a Franciscan or Jesuit to talk to. Being gay isn’t the sin, it’s having sex - so lie about that if you feel you need to; or just register at your parish, sign up fir whatever education you need to qualify for confirmation & and don’t bring up your sexuality. Dignity Is the gay-Catholic organization, I think their deal is celibacy, but I’m not sure. I personally outgrew the Church for several reasons, but most American Catholics ignore the teaching on contraception & often abortion in their personal lives - you can just ignore the gay stuff. If you minus all the Pelvic Rules - the rest of Catholicism can be pretty socially liberal.

by Anonymousreply 13February 24, 2021 9:29 PM

You could also talk to a socially active nun - they know a lot about skirting around the BS in the hierarchy.

by Anonymousreply 14February 24, 2021 9:33 PM

Isn't it the FOURTH sacrament, after baptism, reconciliation and first communion? I'm pretty sure that Jesus is judging you for not being confirmed yet.

by Anonymousreply 15February 24, 2021 9:35 PM

R8 & R13 — I really enjoy hearing that. I think that’s what I’m likely to do. I’ll probably retain my silence, but if I can make friends with a Franciscan priest I will probably divulge. As with the Dignity program, I don’t want to be celibate — as I am still a virgin. I probably sound like some ugly guy that is in a basement somewhere, but I am definitely not that. Just a hopeless romantic.

by Anonymousreply 16February 24, 2021 9:37 PM

OP -

I am a gay man who was confirmed into the Catholic Church at the age of 47. I straight out asked my priest about this prior to confirmation and he counseled me that it was OK; being gay is NOT a sin.

The Holy Father, Pope Francis, has since come forward to recognize civil unions as VALID, although “marriage” between two members of the same gender are not performed by the Catholic Church.

Your heart, mind, and soul are in the right place, and you are being HONEST with yourself and others. Christ loves you more than you will ever know.

Oh, and BTW, people with tattoos or who eat oysters aren’t going to Hell, either.

by Anonymousreply 17February 24, 2021 9:38 PM

R15, that was a typo. Forgive me, lord LOL it is the fourth sacrament.

by Anonymousreply 18February 24, 2021 9:38 PM

I’ve already blocked R15, so he must be an ASSHOLE. Don’t ask him for forgiveness, R18.

by Anonymousreply 19February 24, 2021 9:40 PM

OP, I think if you know a priest who has been friendly and or seems to have a welcoming attitude, it would be worth a conversation with him.

Reaching out to Dignity is another good suggestion.

I do know that in nearly every religion - but particularly for the Catholic Church - there can be a big difference between The Institution and A Congregation and/or the people in the pews. So it may be that your local congregation would be more accepting. But maybe not. Even if you, individually, were embraced by members, the sticking point is that marrying in your church would be out of the question (as well as possibly baptizing any babies you might have or adopt).

I came to my faith later in life, after a long period of belief that there was no home for LGBTQ people in any church. It was important to me that my church be Open and Affirming.

I don't say this lightly or in a glib way, OP, but it concerns me that isn't a high priority for you - you seem so willing to hide a part of yourself to be part of this organization. It's not fair to you.

There are so many other options. Episcopalians and UCC churches believe in the Holy Trinity but affirm gay members. Unitarians have no creed, but I know so many Catholics who are there now because they appreciate the beauty of the rituals. It sounds like I am suggesting an easy fix; I am not. But I want you to proceed with caution.

by Anonymousreply 20February 24, 2021 9:43 PM

R17 - thank you for that encouragement. I intend to begin the education process for confirmation after Covid. I feel deeply that my heart is in the right place as well, so that really reassures my feelings. God bless!

by Anonymousreply 21February 24, 2021 9:46 PM

Agree with those who said Franciscans. Many of us who try to get out of Catholicism but get pulled back in find a home in a Franciscan parish.

by Anonymousreply 22February 24, 2021 9:46 PM

[quote] I’ll probably retain my silence ... Just a hopeless romantic.

OP, that sounds like being somewhat closeted.

by Anonymousreply 23February 24, 2021 9:47 PM

[quote]R21 God bless!

How about you [italic]fuck off [/italic] instead.

by Anonymousreply 24February 24, 2021 9:51 PM

R23 — I am somewhat closeted. My parents are homophobic and definitely not open to me being who I am. My friends know, the people in my occupation do not. But that will change sooner than later.

by Anonymousreply 25February 24, 2021 9:52 PM

Beauty of the rituals in the UU church? Sure, if your idea of ritual is standing in a circle while singing “We Are a Gentle, Angry People.”

by Anonymousreply 26February 24, 2021 9:54 PM

Good luck with your self-inflicted dilemma, OP.

That's the best I can muster.

by Anonymousreply 27February 24, 2021 9:54 PM

Ha ha, R26.

by Anonymousreply 28February 24, 2021 9:58 PM

OP you need a shrink.

You do realize that those men in drag in the Vatican consider your sexually as "intrinsically disordered"? The whole thing is a load of bollix. At 24 you need to get the fuck out there and do some serious cocksucking and topping/bottoming.

Live babe, live.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 29February 24, 2021 9:59 PM

[quote] [R23] — I am somewhat closeted. My parents are homophobic and definitely not open to me being who I am. My friends know, the people in my occupation do not. But that will change sooner than later.

Understood, OP / R25. There is something very alluring about the Catholic church, the imagery, the rituals, etc. I understand wanting to be part of that. To get confirmed, to take that sacrament, is to take an affirmative step into something where you again can't truly be yourself. How about this: tell the priest or whoever that you are gay. See what he says.

I'm not saying that you have to burst out of the closet right now. But I really can't advocate for voluntarily putting yourself into a closet when you don't have to.

by Anonymousreply 30February 24, 2021 9:59 PM

[quote]Good luck with your self-inflicted dilemma, OP.

OP, this is in no way, shape, or form a "self-inflicted dilemma". Christ calls us to examine our conscience and motives. You are clearly doing just that.

Many years ago, I was talking to a priest and going on and on about the resurrected Christ; he listened, and replied, "so many of today's churches focus on the resurrected Christ and forget about the suffering Christ." Christ is the Word made flesh, and dwelt amongst us to share our lives - good, bad, and indifferent; he felt the pain we feel, struggled with the same issues we struggle with, and WEPT openly. What you're doing at the moment is being completely open and honest before yourself, God, and other humans (as if God doesn't know already . . . ). That is all Christ asks of you: Love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, and your neighbor as yourself - PERIOD.

by Anonymousreply 31February 24, 2021 11:22 PM

Just read R15's post. I was right; he IS an asshole.

by Anonymousreply 32February 24, 2021 11:28 PM

OP, look around for Catholic adult education classes at a church you like. You probably will need to go through something like that first.

by Anonymousreply 33February 25, 2021 12:55 AM

The pastor of my Franciscan parish told me 60% of the friars across America are gay.

by Anonymousreply 34February 25, 2021 1:10 AM

You’re in a cult!!

🙀

by Anonymousreply 35February 25, 2021 1:14 AM

OP, I was one of the little gay boys who at three years old looked around, decided there was no way I wanted to have life like married people had, and announced I was going to be a priest. I dropped that (although I was a very devout boy, knew the Latin Mass as well as the liturgy in English, dressed up and made my siblings attend Mass in my room, and on and on) with puberty and being a more-or-less rational person. I'm a cultural Catholic but don't believe in an historical Jesus (Thank you, Richard Carrier.), find the patristic past a political power play (ppppp) and loathe the patriarchal hatred in the radical right and soft middle of the Church.

And, yes, growing up I knew many, many gay priests in all the orders and among the Archdiocesan set. One of my best memories is making out with my bf, a soon-to-leave seminarian in the seminary bell tower as the bells struck 11 pm. At present two cousins are in a right-wing traditionalist seminary, and I am watching them turn into little pissy, pompous monsters.

BUT

I think that going it alone for meaning is hard for almost everyone. The history of the Church is the history of the Western World, with distillations and expressions of ancient civilizations filtered through what, in the end, is a very simple set of values and postulations. Ignoring the brutishness and bias of the formal Church, a person can engage in any number of paths that are good and helpful, while not giving up reality. Myth is myth and ritual is ritual; it's what we do with them that matters.

I have kept up with nuns from school and there are many who are very liberal, going to services held by women priests, standing up for abortion rights, supporting gay rights and living in the real world. Many priests and brothers, likewise, reject the games and pronouncements of the Vatican. They live in the spirit of what the best of what they believe. So do many lay people, of course.

Short answer, finally: Do what you want. In every diocese of any size there places where sane people can engage, including with the sacraments, without stepping into the break-off or cut-off groups (some of which are still considered "licit," although not approved). College/university Catholic groups, a particular parish with a reputation for being liberal, individual clergy who are social activists. Confirmation requires a bishop, but being gay would not mean anything to your being confirmed.

The catch is that confirmation requires, usually, some classes. Nowadays it is the thing for confirmations to take place on Holy Saturday, restoring the idea (part of Christian history being its using aspects of the Mystery cults) with a multi-stage indoctrination - like the $cientoligists use!) of the Catechumens being the baptized and the Faithful being those are "confirmed."

If you want to put a little time into it, go ahead. It's an interesting ritual. And, if you wish to feel like a "full" Catholic, confirmation is part of it.

by Anonymousreply 36February 25, 2021 1:25 AM

If you're circumcised OP, you are already set up to convert to Judaism.

by Anonymousreply 37February 25, 2021 2:44 AM

My dick was getting hard at the thought of other males at the age of 13. Do you think I was worried about confirmation? Fuck no. Grow up. It's all a fairy tale. Listening to religious types is as bad as sitting through some ass that wants one to believe his conspiracy theories. It's all nonsense and no one really knows what the truth is.

by Anonymousreply 38February 25, 2021 2:48 AM

How sad that you have self-doubt based on a corrupt made-up religion that worships a dead Jewish guy, an invisible boogey man in the sky, and a wisp of smoke. Better consult with a gay-hating closet case who probably molests boys. That'll fix it!

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by Anonymousreply 39February 25, 2021 2:53 AM

Just become an Episcopalian. The liturgy will be totally familiar and you will be welcomed, and lots of out people in the pews.

by Anonymousreply 40February 25, 2021 3:00 AM

R31 -- you are so wonderful, and a great change of character compared to the anti-religious on the Lounge. Thank you for that. Jesus is a perfect symbol and person who dealt with so many struggles and fables. He knows us, not just by name as it's said, but our suffering. I love the Lord, God, and absolutely my neighbor with all my heart. It hurts me to kill a spider -- I'm a total pacifist and very much a adherant of peace. I definitely curse, but I think God has more to worry about than someone saying bad words. But since giving that largely up as a part of my Lenten sacrifice (political discussion and cussing were my sacrifices) I've been feeling a lot better. Bless you sir, and as they say at end of Mass-- Go forth and announce the Gospel of the Lord!

by Anonymousreply 41February 25, 2021 3:18 AM

R39 I hope you'll find peace in your days. It's very hard to go without something motivating, to your spirit and to your soul in these bewildering times. My faith helps it, please don't take it away.

by Anonymousreply 42February 25, 2021 3:20 AM

R40 -- That is my last resort, if the Archdiocese of New Orleans is that stringent about me and who I am. I always thought about switching to Anglican, which is a communicant to the Catholic church and even accepts same-sex marriage, but the issue is that I cannot become Anglican as it would be a different baptism and set of sacraments. And not to mention not being exactly Anglo -- more Saxon and Gaulic in my descent.

by Anonymousreply 43February 25, 2021 3:22 AM

Confess, Mary OP: you're really just looking for an excuse to get down on your knees more often.

by Anonymousreply 44February 25, 2021 3:40 AM

R45 -- not exactly.

by Anonymousreply 45February 25, 2021 3:41 AM

OP, it is not a sin to be gay, as you don't control the fact that you like dick. However, it is a sin to engage in homosexual acts, as you do control your actions.

by Anonymousreply 46February 25, 2021 3:46 AM

Don't listen to r46. Get your ass laid. At some point, and really by age 24, being a virgin is just neurotic and ridiculous. Unclench and get over the trauma of it all and just get it done.

Also, just live by the Sermon on the Mount and you'll be a better person. Don't agonize about where you put your dick.

by Anonymousreply 47February 25, 2021 3:56 AM

In this day and age, anyone who still believes in the “father” sky god, is a stupid fool. God does not exist. End of subject

by Anonymousreply 48February 25, 2021 3:56 AM

I am Catholic and I ask this in complete sincerity: are there individual Catholic Churches in which gays are openly welcomed? I thought that was against the rules.

by Anonymousreply 49February 25, 2021 4:06 AM

[quote] The Holy Father, Pope Francis, has since come forward to recognize civil unions as VALID, although “marriage” between two members of the same gender are not performed by the Catholic Church.

Let's face it. Civil unions (without the option for marriage) are for second-class citizens. Period.

by Anonymousreply 50February 25, 2021 4:10 AM

[quote] DL assholes

Didn't someone once say, R31, "Judge not, lest ye be judged"?

You're a hypocritical fool, like so many religious people. Enjoy your delusions.

by Anonymousreply 51February 25, 2021 5:06 AM

[quote] It hurts me to kill a spider -- I'm a total pacifist and very much a adherant [sic] of peace.

Your religion had no problem massacring millions over the past centuries. But how nice for the spider.

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by Anonymousreply 52February 25, 2021 5:08 AM

It is a weird thought, but for hundreds of years r52 pretty much every European was a homicidal religious maniac, at least by modern terms. It was simply a given that if somebody had the wrong view of Christ or Heaven or the Bible or the proper role of the Church, they deserved to be killed. Maybe individuals didn't have the right to kill them, but certainly kings and governments did. And Protestants might disagree with Catholics about which doctrines were accurate, but they would agree on that. Anyone who was wrong about doctrines deserved to be killed, at least if they stubbornly persisted in being wrong about those doctrines.

And don't even get started on the Jews.

by Anonymousreply 53February 25, 2021 5:14 AM

Catholics were most aggressive with the mass murder, having Rome as their thugs.

by Anonymousreply 54February 25, 2021 5:17 AM

Honestly, the "witches" might disagree r54. Protestants really got into the witch burning, at least as much as the Catholics. People just loved burning heretics and everybody "of the devil" as long as they could find an excuse. Germany was a nightmare, precisely because nobody could decide if it was Protestant or Catholic for about 100 years, or longer.

by Anonymousreply 55February 25, 2021 5:20 AM

[quote] In this day and age, anyone who still believes in the “father” sky god, is a stupid fool.

I don’t believe in God, heaven, etc. However, I once told a Catholic friend that I could understand believing in God and Jesus, but give me a break about the Holy Ghost. Her face dropped. I didn’t realize it was a sensitive subject, but I guess that was obtuse of me.

by Anonymousreply 56February 25, 2021 5:22 AM

I have to say, even when I was a Catholic r56, I never really had the faintest idea what the Holy Ghost was all about. God the Father, God the Son, both pretty vivid. God the Holy Ghost? Really vague and hard to pin down.

by Anonymousreply 57February 25, 2021 5:33 AM

Supposedly, Mary (mother of Jesus) was a minor figure until relatively recently. Apparently, Mary caught on with Catholics.

by Anonymousreply 58February 25, 2021 5:35 AM

Define "recently" r58. They were killing each over the exact role of Mary in the Byzantine Empire in the 400s and 500s.

by Anonymousreply 59February 25, 2021 5:40 AM

You know as well as I do the majority of priests are repressive homosexuals who chickened out to the pulpit!

by Anonymousreply 60February 25, 2021 5:43 AM

OP, if you really want to know God and Jesus, I would advise looking for a different denomination. The Catholic Church is deader than dead and they’re so desperate in the US that they no longer stand for anything. Some of their traditions are pretty but that’s about it.

by Anonymousreply 61February 25, 2021 5:48 AM

There is no denomination that actually knows God or Jesus. These things are invented, never known. Some may be healthier or less healthy, but nobody actually knows anything they claim to know when it comes to religion.

by Anonymousreply 62February 25, 2021 5:50 AM

Maybe Paul had the right idea. Just invent some conversations with the Heavenly Christ and pretty much go from there. What works, works. What doesn't, just discard.

by Anonymousreply 63February 25, 2021 5:52 AM

well, since it's just me now, I am going to talk to myself. The big missing piece in the puzzle of Christianity, the big thing that most every American and most Europeans miss is that the Catholic Church as it exists today did not invent Christianity. The Orthodox Church did. The Byzantine Empire, which was actually the Roman Empire or what was left of it, invented Christianity. The Councils were all held in the Byzantine Empire, and they nailed down all those weird and complicated doctrines that still don't make much sense after 1500 years. But there they are. That Jesus was God, and also the son of God, and they are the same, but weirdly distinct. And also there is this weird third being the Holy Spirit that infuses the world in some weird and probably stupid way. Also Mary was the mother of God, who also was a kind of husband who impregnated her in some weird and stupid way. And you have to believe in Jesus, although I don't really know why. He died for our sins, but really what the hell is that nonsense? who the hell dies for somebody else's sins? What the hell does that even mean.

anyway, thus endeth the lesson.

by Anonymousreply 64February 25, 2021 6:11 AM

[quote] He died for our sins, but really what the hell is that nonsense?

That’s the martyr thing.

by Anonymousreply 65February 25, 2021 6:15 AM

R64 Not all denominations believe in that. Some are nontrinitarian.

by Anonymousreply 66February 25, 2021 6:17 AM

earnest Unitarians in sensible shoes don't count r66

by Anonymousreply 67February 25, 2021 6:17 AM

Gay Christians are like women in abusive relationships. They either believe that they deserve the abuse or they think they can change him if they stay. Either way, it never ends well.

by Anonymousreply 68February 25, 2021 6:48 AM

[quote] In this day and age, anyone who still believes in the “father” sky god, is a stupid fool. God does not exist. End of subject[/quote]

This is really all that needs to be said. Everything else is just BS.

OP, you seem like a genuinely wonderful person, but dude... seriously. Take a look at the world. It is the way it is because there is no god. I’m terrified of living and dying. But the intensity of my fear doesn’t convince me to believe in something is so clearly a glorified fairy tale.

by Anonymousreply 69February 25, 2021 6:53 AM

Whatever happened to Confession (or Reconciliation)? My Catholic church doesn’t offer it and skips over that part of the Mass, and it’s a regular diocese church, not some hippie cult breakaway.

by Anonymousreply 70February 25, 2021 7:15 AM

I went back to the church after being away for many years and was confirmed as an adult. I am open and out at my church and have honestly never ever been made to feel less than anyone else. Find a parish where you can be honest with yourself and others. Mine, quite remarkably, is/was my parish while growing up. Listen to your heart. Listen to Pope Francis. Good luck to you,

by Anonymousreply 71February 25, 2021 7:27 AM

Since you weren't Confirmed when you were younger, you'll now have to attend months of classes (RCIA classes, i.e., Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults) and then be Confirmed with others in the program at the parish's Easter Vigil.

by Anonymousreply 72February 25, 2021 8:46 AM

R70 Every parish offers Reconciliation, but I hear that some smaller parishes only do so by appointment. (Some pastors manage more than one parish, so they can't be everywhere, and only priests can forgive sins.)

by Anonymousreply 73February 25, 2021 8:49 AM

R58 That's not true at all. Veneration of Mary goes back to the 3rd century. Essentially, Catholics believe Mary is more than just a saint, but less than God.

by Anonymousreply 74February 25, 2021 9:11 AM

More than a woman, too.

by Anonymousreply 75February 25, 2021 11:39 AM

Most Catholics don't believe in the doctrine. Look at Pelosi for instance. She takes comfort from the church and certain biblical passages, but you know damn well she's not buying the whole package

by Anonymousreply 76February 25, 2021 3:42 PM

Let's face it. No American politician will admit that they are an atheist. They use their Christianity to get votes.

by Anonymousreply 77February 25, 2021 4:05 PM

You were a child sexual predator so your step father's parents tried to fix you with the church

You've been in therapy since you were 12.

You're a lost cause

by Anonymousreply 78February 25, 2021 5:15 PM

I went to Catholic School and, within days, realize one hour a day was devoted to magical thinking.

Anyhow, the rest was nice and academically rigorous.

Interestingly, when my family moved to a suburb when I was entering 9th grade, I fought my parents because they want to send me to the local public high school, which was good. I finally relented when the distance to my Catholic school didn't make sense to commute twice daily.

The public school, it turns out, had far better resources and connections. I went to a top-ranked college, which would have been doubtful if I had stayed in my Catholic School (the school mainly sent kids to local colleges or catholic colleges).

And, my Catholic school experience made me an avowed atheist. And honestly, some of the priests at the catholic school were likely atheists too.

by Anonymousreply 79February 25, 2021 5:21 PM

True Christianity can be boiled down to: Love thy neighbor and Judge not.

That's it.

The rest of the rituals and rules mean nothing.

by Anonymousreply 80February 25, 2021 5:22 PM

I’d say your desire to be confirmed is a sign of the Holy Spirit at work within you, prompting you to seek closer communion with God. Go ahead then and “be sealed with the gift of the Holy Spirit,” as the Bishop will say when he annoints your head with the consecrated oil. When you are confirmed, you are ratifying the decision your parents and godparents made lovingly on your behalf when they brought you to the font as an infant. They initiated you then into the life of grace; as a confirmand you are now choosing to live that life in its fullness.

by Anonymousreply 81February 25, 2021 5:50 PM

[quote] Most Catholics don't believe in the doctrine.

This is true. I've never (or at least rarely) met too many churchy Catholics who drone on and on about the Good Lord or the baby Jesus. Or proselytize --ugh.

by Anonymousreply 82February 25, 2021 6:02 PM

Please join us in reality, R81

by Anonymousreply 83February 25, 2021 6:04 PM

If your parents don't bring you to the font as an infant you go to helvetica.

by Anonymousreply 84February 25, 2021 6:35 PM

[quote]R31 OP, this is in no way, shape, or form a "self-inflicted dilemma". Christ calls us to examine our conscience and motives.

Like normal people don’t do that already?

Jiminy Christmas, anyone who needs an invisible sky fairy to tell them to look at themselves is in deep shit, already.

by Anonymousreply 85February 25, 2021 6:44 PM

[quote] They initiated you then into the life of grace; as a confirmand you are now choosing to live that life in its fullness.

Fullness, without the gay part.

by Anonymousreply 86February 25, 2021 7:04 PM

[quote] he felt the pain we feel, struggled with the same issues we struggle with

You can say with certainty that Christ was (closeted) homosexual?

by Anonymousreply 87February 25, 2021 7:18 PM

[quote] Let's face it. No American politician will admit that they are an atheist. They use their Christianity to get votes.

Yes. It pissed me off so much when the Republicans kept saying Obama was a Muslim pretending to be Christian. Like no, he was obviously an atheist pretending to be Christian.

by Anonymousreply 88February 25, 2021 7:27 PM

[quote] I have to say, even when I was a Catholic [R56], I never really had the faintest idea what the Holy Ghost was all about. God the Father, God the Son, both pretty vivid. God the Holy Ghost?

I once told a priest that I didn't know much about the Holy Spirit.

His response: "Neither does the Church."

by Anonymousreply 89February 25, 2021 7:28 PM

Trump was probably just pretending to be Christian too, of course.

The widespread disdain boomers have for religion annoys me.

by Anonymousreply 90February 25, 2021 7:31 PM

God yes, Trump was completely pretending. He just wanted the Evangelical vote.

by Anonymousreply 91February 25, 2021 7:32 PM

I'll give that to Trump: the one good thing he did was to damage Christianity bigly and drive more people from it.

by Anonymousreply 92February 25, 2021 8:11 PM

R77 Not true. There have been plenty of atheists who have been elected, including Gov. Jesse Ventura, Rep Pete Stark and Rep Barney Frank. Do your homework, gurl.

by Anonymousreply 93February 25, 2021 8:15 PM

Yes, Trump was a religious carpetbagger. When he said "Two Corinthians," the churches should have parted ways with him.

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by Anonymousreply 94February 25, 2021 8:45 PM

[quote] Whatever happened to Confession (or Reconciliation)? My Catholic church doesn’t offer it and skips over that part of the Mass, and it’s a regular diocese church, not some hippie cult breakaway.

Confession is a sacrament that is separate and apart from the Mass, which provides the sacrament of the Eucharist (body of Christ). However, every Mass begins with a penitential rite that can take a number of different forms such as the Kyrie (Lord have mercy) or the “I confess to almighty God, and to you my brothers and sisters, that I have greatly sinned . . .”

by Anonymousreply 95February 25, 2021 8:54 PM

[quote] [R31] OP, this is in no way, shape, or form a "self-inflicted dilemma". Christ calls us to examine our conscience and motives. Like normal people don’t do that already?

Jiminy Christmas, anyone who needs an invisible sky fairy to tell them to look at themselves is in deep shit, already.

R85 - No, they don’t. The vast majority of people go through life without ever once taking time to reflect on a situation and ask themselves “Gee, what was my role in this debacle?” or “What could I have done differently that would have resulted in a better outcome?”.

They are usually too busy pointing fingers and assigning blame to others to look in a mirror and be honest with themselves.

by Anonymousreply 96February 25, 2021 9:04 PM

[quote] Christ calls us to examine our conscience and motives.

Does he dial the phone with a nail?

by Anonymousreply 97February 25, 2021 9:13 PM

[quote] I’d say your desire to be confirmed is a sign of the Holy Spirit at work within you, prompting you to seek closer communion with God.

Or, more likely, an obsessive-compulsive need for an oft-repeated ritual to provide the illusion of holiness to yet another gullible sack of flesh who thinks he's better than others for eating a cracker and having tepid water shaken at him.

by Anonymousreply 98February 25, 2021 9:15 PM

Who created you? Did you make a choice to be gay or straight?

I'm Catholic and a you need to remember that the Bible was written by man but inspired by God. So there are mistakes in it. I actually took a course from a priest that pointed out all the mistakes in the Bible. All the rules in the church were made by man so again there are mistakes.

God created you the way you are. Does he make mistakes?

Get confirmed.

by Anonymousreply 99February 25, 2021 9:23 PM

also remember that it is not a sin to be gay. The sin is the intercourse without marriage, exactly the same as it is for straight people who aren't married.

by Anonymousreply 100February 25, 2021 9:25 PM

OP, I became a Catholic as an adult at a parish in St. Pete FL where my priest knew I was a lesbian. The RCIA class was fascinating and I learned many things that I thought the Catholic church would never confess to (pun intended). I'm still close to my godparents 20 years later; they're my surrogate family, and they'll love me no matter what, unlike my blood relatives. They have a gay son I'm close to as well.

It was good for me at the time I did it. I've since become an atheist (things I read here at DL over the years made me change my mind about religion), but if I ever became a believer again, I would certainly go back to the Catholics. It really is a comfort. Go to RCIA, OP, and get confirmed; you won't regret it.

by Anonymousreply 101February 25, 2021 9:41 PM

R92 I would never stop following Christ because of a politician. Anyone who would was never following Christ in the first place.

by Anonymousreply 102February 25, 2021 9:44 PM

It took me a while to finally get the OP's issues.

Never mind then.

by Anonymousreply 103February 25, 2021 9:44 PM

I love this Confirmation day photo from 1960.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 104February 25, 2021 11:26 PM

That is indeed a beautiful photo ^^^.

Don’t get confirmed, OP. Don’t listen to R99, or to R101, whose reply makes no sense. There is no evidence for the existence of any gods whatsoever.

by Anonymousreply 105February 26, 2021 12:29 AM

No longer Catholic, but I found it odd when at Confirmation we were selecting/inducting into the Catholic Church and we were not instructed on other options.

Choose 1:

A. Catholic

B. Catholic

C. Catholic

D. Catholic

E. All of the Above

by Anonymousreply 106February 26, 2021 12:35 AM

I was raised Catholic and confirmed. I stop attending after college. I don’t think all priests are pedophiles or that there is no value to The Church. It has saved my parents from unimaginable grief. Attending an occassional mass feeds that part of me. I simply don’t take communion because I don’t practice. It’s easy to dismiss religion however tolerance is a sign of maturity What a surprising DL thread.

by Anonymousreply 107February 26, 2021 1:39 AM

Which sacrament gets me time with these fathers?

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 108February 26, 2021 2:36 AM

Where in the Bible does it say that you have to be accepted and confirmed by the Catholic Church?

If you’re religious, pray, believe, and follow the 10 commandments. If God had wanted more rules for his sheep, don’t you think he would have added them to the existing 10 commandments?

by Anonymousreply 109February 26, 2021 2:49 AM

Go have it at a Jesuit or Franciscan parish. Big-city parishes with people from those orders at the helm are quite open-minded (sometimes too open-minded...😉)

by Anonymousreply 110February 26, 2021 3:08 AM

OP here. Thank you for all the wonderful comments and opinions on my current matter. I have surely decided I will go forth with my confirmation and continue my path to a clearer mind, which is closer to God. Religion is extremely personal to me, but as I am anonymous (and a guy, just because I forgot pronouns) -- I feel very comfortable talking about this with this great community. To the 'sky god' people out there: You must be that kid in class that loved telling everyone that Santa isn't real and got satisfaction doing it.

I will definitely seek out a Jesuit or Franciscan parish, with a more open mind. My local parishes I fear may be a bit more on the conservative side, yet the Catholic dynamic has definitely become more acceptance-worthy here in New Orleans. If there are any NOLA catholics here, if someone could help lead me to which churches/parishes are Franciscan that would be wonderful. Whichever wouldn't mind having a gay member as a part of their parish. Post-COVID I will continue with these plans.

by Anonymousreply 111February 26, 2021 3:50 AM

R109 You're silly, gurl. First of all, not sure someone looking for advice on a sacrament should listen to an atheist. Also, the Catholic Church relies not solely on scripture but on tradition, so that's where confirmation comes in. If you were raised Catholic, you'd know that.

by Anonymousreply 112February 26, 2021 2:21 PM

R111 So happy for you! God bless!

by Anonymousreply 113February 26, 2021 2:22 PM

-666/10

The OP is claiming to be a 24 year old virgin Catholic who gave up "political discussion and cussing" for Lent and is seeking religious advice on a gay-ish entertainment board, and you idiots have fallen for it. Fuck's sake!

OP, get back to fapping to altar boy porn on 8chan. And take your meds.

by Anonymousreply 114February 26, 2021 2:55 PM

... And if you don't believe me, here's one of our little Catholic tot's other posts:

[quote]I subscribed to Monthly just to thank R7 and R27 for finally solving the cut/uncut mystery of the Bidens. If I didn't just bust a nut I would've totally done it to those pix. Gorgeous cock on a pretty gorgeous man -- even as a crack addict and tax evader. I think the Republicans are doing the investigation thing on purpose, they want to see more of that pretty boy cock. Trump's stump gets stiff with this shit. Bannon's too.

Some MAGAt cunt is playing you for fools.

by Anonymousreply 115February 26, 2021 3:01 PM

[quote] also remember that it is not a sin to be gay. The sin is the intercourse without marriage, exactly the same as it is for straight people who aren't married.

Of course that is nowhere in the Bible--it's made up to make people think the Church loves gays as long as we stay celibate.

And while they're at it, they fight gay marriage.

by Anonymousreply 116February 26, 2021 3:08 PM

OP if you're looking for meaning to your existence can I suggest you put the bible down and read a book that's at least grounded in reality?:

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 117February 26, 2021 3:09 PM

Often we just play along with ESTs because it's fun not because we actually believe their dilemmas.

OP if you are worried about a priest you want to discuss this with coming on to you and molesting you just find one you find attractive so you will not find his attentions inappropriate(it all depends on how attractive you find the individual doesn't it?) You will therefore find both spiritual and physical fulfillment though the physical is so much more important. I mean what is more important to one's existence praying or eating?

by Anonymousreply 118February 26, 2021 3:16 PM

OP We'd love to help you prepare for confirmation

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 119February 26, 2021 3:26 PM

OP, you need some clarification on Anglicans. If you mean the worldwide Anglican communion (with titular head the Bishop of Canterbury), it is NOT in full communion with the Roman Catholic church. If you attend a RC church and look in the booklet, you'll find a list of churches that are, where the RCs allow their communicants to receive ( Eastern Orthodox is one, I think, and some really obscure offshoots). But Anglicans or Episcopalians in the US are NOT allowed to receive the sacrament in a RC church. (Not to say that it hasn't been done.). Also, the RC church DOES recognize baptism in other denominations. The Apostles Creed reads "we acknowledge" one baptism. As long as the baptism was done in the trinitarian formula "in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit" it counts. Even a lay person can baptize in extremis.

And the Episcopal does recognize the same 7 sacraments, though it elevates communion (Mass, Eucharist) and Baptism above the others as Christ-instituted.

And another thing, there is always corporate confession (except in certain liturgical seasons) as part of the Mass in the Episcopal church ("I confess that....") followed by absolution by the priest. Private Confession or the rite of reconciliation (one of the sacraments) is also available, though generally offered only in Lent or at other times.

And Anglo has nothing to do with Saxon, anymore than you need to be Italian or Roman to be RC.

And, a final comment: come out! Really, your life will improve even if there is drama and angst initially. Your parents will get over it (and they know anyway, really, don't they?)

by Anonymousreply 120February 26, 2021 3:27 PM

[quote] Of course that is nowhere in the Bible--it's made up to make people think the Church loves gays as long as we stay celibate.

You lack an understanding of moral theology, R116.

by Anonymousreply 121February 26, 2021 3:58 PM

R120 — Thank you for the clarifications. A lot of this was told to me by my parents, so obviously I need to do my own reading. My parents are considerably old fashioned, so it’s been a very gradual process. My mother knows, my dad is ignorant to it. It’s like my mother is Maude but my dad is Archie Bunker.

by Anonymousreply 122February 26, 2021 4:01 PM

[quote] Where in the Bible does it say that you have to be accepted and confirmed by the Catholic Church?

Ignorant Protestant.

by Anonymousreply 123February 26, 2021 4:07 PM

OP, honey, if you're a Catholic and faith means so much to you, why are you asking about this here and not talking to your priest? Troll.

by Anonymousreply 124February 26, 2021 4:10 PM

R124 — I can’t exactly get acquainted with a priest during these times. I’m in lockdown, stuck at home. I am not a troll by any means, I wasn’t expecting actually thread of this tour to become slanderous and downright bullying. I’ve surely written NSFW here, but I’m honestly sick of even using my mind in those ways. I’m truly a lost babe in the woods, and extremely shy.

For every kind and considerate message, which was so kind of you all who did, there is of course an atheistic troll trying to drag me down in negativity with them. Some responses by people slandering me give me doubts that I truly have safety on this website. Unless it’s Muriel being harsh on me. It makes me question continuing my membership because of that. this is an ANONYMOUS forum!

by Anonymousreply 125February 26, 2021 4:30 PM

[quote]I can’t exactly get acquainted with a priest during these times.

Complete bullshit. Zoom exists.

You're a troll. Bye hon.

by Anonymousreply 126February 26, 2021 4:34 PM

R126 I’ve never used Zoom. Don’t think I’m gonna meet a priest on Discord anytime soon.

by Anonymousreply 127February 26, 2021 4:38 PM

[quote]R99 you need to remember that the Bible was written by man but inspired by God. So there are mistakes in it... Does He make mistakes?

Are you serious?

It seems our omnipotent, all-knowing god made a huuuuuuuge mistake in not even bothering to come down and correct the text, damning mankind to play a destiny-risking game for centuries without the proper instruction book.

How cruel.

by Anonymousreply 128February 26, 2021 7:44 PM

[quote] You lack an understanding of moral theology

As apparently do Christians

by Anonymousreply 129February 26, 2021 7:52 PM

The Bible was written by man to exert power over others.

By claiming this is the only way to understand God, it all about power and hierarchy.

by Anonymousreply 130February 26, 2021 7:53 PM

Yes, go get confirmed.

Pledge yourself to the magic man in the sky.

by Anonymousreply 131February 26, 2021 7:54 PM

R114 is my least favorite poster on this forum.

Not everything is an effort to deceive you. You’re fucking paranoid and narcissistic. Get over yourself.

by Anonymousreply 132February 26, 2021 7:56 PM

As R125 shows, Mary OP has already mastered the fine points of the Catholic martyr complex syndrome.

by Anonymousreply 133February 26, 2021 8:31 PM

The threads about Catholicism always run long on DL. Supporters and haters. No other faith elicits as much discussion.

by Anonymousreply 134February 27, 2021 12:55 PM

R26 Unitarians takes rituals from everywhere. Shofars, prayer wheels, dreamcatchers, bamboo flutes, funny hats, advent wreaths, mandalas, etc. It's like a variety show.

by Anonymousreply 135February 27, 2021 1:21 PM

If you are a man, you could go for all seven. It's been done.

by Anonymousreply 136February 27, 2021 1:24 PM

The Catholic church is the one and only true Christian church, all the others are not legitimate.

by Anonymousreply 137February 27, 2021 2:01 PM

^No, the Reformation was needed due to the corruption.

by Anonymousreply 138February 27, 2021 2:41 PM

[quote]R135 Unitarians takes rituals from everywhere... It's like a variety show.

Somethin’ WRONG with a variety show?

by Anonymousreply 139February 27, 2021 3:28 PM

My Catholic church sent parishioners a Lenten commemorative NAIL for the season, and my sweet-natured Jewish husband said “two more years and you’ll have a complete set.”

by Anonymousreply 140February 27, 2021 3:44 PM

Dear Defacto, the feeling is mutual, you MAGAt cunt. Go sprinkle some Trump holy water on a Nilla Wafer and choke on it.

by Anonymousreply 141February 28, 2021 12:08 AM

r64, "St" Paul created Christianity. Paul, who never met Jesus while alive, took all of his teachings, coordinated them and put his crap in the Bible next to the Gospels. Right from the start, Christianity has been dodgy.

Christ was a Jew.

As for OP, visit a few Catholic monasteries in the US. Having slept with them all, I find Dominicans greasy little piggies, Jesuits are Do-Me tops who like sex but hate people, and Benedictines are bears who can bake. If you want a confirmation, sleep with them grrrl friend.

by Anonymousreply 142February 28, 2021 12:24 AM

R142 is obviously single (for so many reasons) and prolly does meth by now.

by Anonymousreply 143February 28, 2021 3:37 PM

^ And he doesn't know why.

by Anonymousreply 144March 1, 2021 10:12 AM

Organized religion helps no one.

by Anonymousreply 145March 1, 2021 11:19 AM
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