Why do so many men fart when they're pissing at the urinal?

Miss Lindsey Graham has spoken.

As unseemly as Op’s boot fetish.

And what exactly are you doing in the men's room, Miss Lawson?

Clearly, OP doesn't understand basic anatomy.

OP, would you prefer I fart at the dinner table?

If the terlet isn't the right place, then where is?

On a similar subject, I oftentimes wondered about women who all go tinkle in herds. When they get in the stall and keep yaking amongst themselves and they all let loose with big ol windy farts; do they keep cackling on with each other or say excuse me.

On second thought, maybe I really don’t need to know.

I'd imagine it might have something to do with undoing your pants and relaxing your.... uh.... inner regions while you pee. But really, OP, most men just fart all the time.

Well, it's not like you can control your farts when pissing. It's the way the body works.

R2 what boot fetish?

Oh, that? Why, that's just their mating call to attract closeted scat queens.

Do you know why farts stink? So deaf people can enjoy them too.

MARY!

Wait, can man really not control whether they fart or not when they urinate? I thought men just enjoyed it, like the groan when they pee.

It's true, r14. They just slip through on their own.

Well, really, if you can't fart in the shithouse, where can you fart?

Years ago when I worked as support staff at a large law firm, I overheard an old senior partner tell a young associate attorney in the mens room as they washed their hands: "You know, when I was a young man, everybody used to fart more and laugh about it more."

Wait r14. Women don't usually fart when they pee? This would be new to me.

that's crazy r15! I am a grown ass woman who learned something new today!

Women can hold them all day if need be, through pees, tampon changes, etc. If no one is around and it's a relatively soundproof bathroom we may choose to fart. or not.

r19 - Well, it's not like like we fart *every* time we pee. Usually it's a first pee in the morning thing. They even did a quick bit on it on a Two and a Half Men episode.

Yeah, even then I rarely fart and wouldn't ever if any2was around. I am relieved to hear that it's not some uncontrollable thing every time you guys pee. that would be crazy

I was standing next to an old man at the urinal once when he let out a loud fart while peeing.

He chuckled and said “once the juice has been squeezed out, all that’s left is air”. I thought it was a great metaphor and repeat it to myself whenever I fart after peeing.

Rescue chick. Do you women pee when you shit or are those two functions controlled independently of each other to?

I don't mind the loud or bubbly ones. The ARE funny. It's the silent but deadlies I hate.

We can do both at the same time r23 but most of the time we (I) can shit first if needed and then pee (or not pee if I don't need to). Unless it's an urgent situation on either side. Time correctly, it's almost like having a built in non sterile low flow bidet

I think all this may have to do with women having an extra hole just for peeing.

Trying to hold in a fart at the urinal is a fool’s errand.

Also, men have an extra hole for peeing too. It’s right at the end of our dicks.

R27 read carefully. JUST for peeing.

I remember once in a crowded men's room at work, one guy rushed in, took the first empty stall and let loose with an incredible series of plops and loud farts. The stench was so overwhelming that all conversation stopped. Finally a voice came from another stall: "Jesus Christ guy, go see a doctor. That smells like something crawled up inside you and died."

What are they supposed to do, hold it in and then fart after they leave the bathroom? That's even worse!

Light a match.

And always remember the courtesy flush.

R29 here. Meant to add that at that point the dead silent room exploded into laughter. Whatever.

OP: Go study human anatomy. It you knew anything about it, you would know why.

To urinate the pelvic floor muscles relax. The same group of muscles control the release of urine and the release of flatulence.

Therefore when they relax to urinate they also relax at the anal sphincter allowing gas to pass.

R26 - “ I think all this may have to do with women having an extra hole just for peeing.”

Uhh, Dr Oz, men also have an extra hole just for peeing. It’s called the urethral opening.

Men ejaculate through that same hole (as well as urinate).

And women pee through a hole separate whole then we give birth through/menstruate. the urethra for is restricted to pee.

lol mixed up the whole/hole situation. reverse that.

I notice it’s usually old men that do this.

If God in his wisdom decided to combine the the genitals with the urogenital tract, who are we to object?

Rofl R29!

[quote]I notice it’s usually old men that do this.

Well of course. We've heard, seen or done it all and nothing surprises us and bodily related functions, or misfunctions, are all too familiar to us. We just don't give a damn any more, don't you know? It's very freeing.

R41, it's a true story, I'm not smart enough to make it up.

r29 Its funny but also mind your business and leave if you're offended by a dudes shit smells in a public bathroom. I'm assuming yours smell like roses?

I don't get your point, r44.

Aww, see! Now I have to go to the bathroom!

It’s a fat bear mating call to demonstrate how butch they really are. Grrrr, woof.

[quote]OP, would you prefer I fart at the dinner table?

Armatures, we've had fart competition going back hundreds of years!

It’s amateurs, not armatures, R48.

All I know is whenever I hear the guys at work rip ass at the urinal it sounds like they should take it to a stall and do a safety wipe. I can only imagine the skid mark situation in these guys shorts.

I only fart when I am pissing when I hear some asshole sitting on the can squawking into his phone.

I hope the person on the line hears my farts!!

R51 Agree. Also, I now have that fucking "Safety Dance" song stuck in my head.

Wait, women don't pee out of their vagina? Where is this separate hole located?? Does the pee come out of the clitoris?

R34, women also pee by relaxing the same muscles but we don't fart when we pee.

[quote]Time correctly, it's almost like having a built in non sterile low flow bidet

I've thought about that before. I always tend to pee after taking a shit (even if I had already peed, a bit more would come out afterward) and figured that maybe it was some evolutionary thing from when we were animals that kept down infections and therefore lead to those females who peed after they shit not dying of uncontrolled urogenital infections or having those infections damage their reproductive abilities.

r54 are you kidding? women have a urethra (where urine comes from, and most likely also the mythical "squirt fluid") and a vagina (where menstrual fluid -blood and lubricating vaginal fluid- and babies comes from). no fluid comes from clitorises...that's the analogous organ to the head of the penis. no matter what you hear about "squirters"...no fluid comes from there, there is no aperture that releases fluid. we also have anuses, just like men.

The head of the penis is where the pee comes out R56 (?!). The female anatomy is so bizzarre with all those separate holes and bits that do who knows what. Sorry, I am 100% gay and have never seen these things in real life and biology class glossed over all these types of very specific items. Frankly I don't really need to know but thanks for sharing.

R57, it's not rocket science. Everyone has a peehole. Everyone has an asshole. Women have a vagina in between those two things. The clitoris is above the peehole like the peak of a tiny litte mountain. Want me to really blow your mind, though? The clitoris is almost the exact same size as a penis, it's just on the inside. It all gets erect, too.

Here's the least traumatizing drawing I could find for you...and it has a penis in the pic, too, for comparison and so you can all glance at it if you feel overwhelmed.

I have a cloaca. At least YOU don't have to piss and shit at the same time!

Well I have a three tiered aqueduct.

Yuck