Shoplifting

Used to.

A month of "weekend" jail and 3 misdemeanor petit larceny charges on my record cured that.

[QUOTE] I make well over $100K

I used to shoplift intermittently as a kid. I would buy a cheap album out of the cut out section. Once it was put into a shopping bag, I would drop other albums into the bag.

...until I was caught.

I think I was 11 or 12 so nothing happened to me legally but, boy, was I chastised by my parents.

I just watched "Girl, Interrupted" and Winona Ryder talks about the thrill of shoplifting in the VO. It was unintentionally amusing.

Once or twice until I got caught when I was a sophomore in H.S. Never again after that.

In my 20s, I worked for a major drugstore chain. It was not the best time in my life -- I was basically an alcoholic and had a tiny coke problem.

I would occasionally pilfer packs of cigarettes.

I haven't stolen before or since, and I'm still not proud of it. I sometimes justify it by thinking of how shittily the chain treated its workers, but I know that doesn't absolve me of stealing. I also feel bad because other employees during my tenure were fired for theft. I guess I was just better at it.

I was brazen as a teen. Got caught and chastised by parents so stopped. Took it up in my early 30s because I was unemployed, so mostly food. Was pretty brazen then too but one day I noticed some asshole I’d had an incomplete one night stand with giving me side eye in an upscale supermarket so I panicked thinking he was security. That irrational panic put paid to my shoplifting career.

What’s the psychological meaning behind shoplifting?

R8, isn't it just getting free stuff?

No, I loathe thieves and the fucked up mentality that goes with it. Because there's always other issues as well.

On the very rare occasions I've encountered it, I've dropped the person like a stone. Who wants to be friends with someone who steals? They will steal your energy too.

OP = Morrissey!

Unlike most of the replies, I didn’t start until I was 40, I’m 42 now.

Never have. I credit that to knowing the manager of a mom and pop grocery when I was small, who was very cool. Empathy goes a long way.

As I grow older, I realize there are few, if any things, worth stealing.

Winona Ryder you in danger girl! 💅🏻

I limit my shoplifting to larger stores, and smaller ones where the owners annoy me. I’ve taken many candles from this shop owned by a vocal fry millennial.

Do you hiss as you pilfer the candles, r16?

I lifted a York Peppermint Patty from Caldor when I was 5. I was never caught. I stole a Kit Kat from Grand Union soon after, but I was caught by my dad and had to go to the store and apologize to the manager. That was the end of my outlaw ways.

R18 is bad to the bone

I don’t but I’ve heard self-checkouts make theft easier than ever before.

I only steal my daddy’s heart!

My sister used to. She may still. She leaves stuff in the lower shelf of a shopping cart and “forgets” to pay for it. I told her that she’ll get caught, and these days, they’ll have video of her doing it multiple times over months, so she won’t be able to claim she “forgot”.

She has a (real) charity she created to memorialize her late daughter, and is well known around town, so it would be terribly shameful if she got caught.

I used to trespass on a golf course to get to a beach on Cape Cod, but I stopped that because I thought an arrest would hurt my job prospects.

Yes, of course.

I never did. But most of my friends did, and brazenly so!

I had a friend who apparently went into a clothing store in the 90s and put a suit....well, apparently put part of it up his ass to get it out of the store.

I stole a Brach's pick and mix chocolate once when I was a little kid.

I’ve heard that there are pros now, teams of stealers, that can steal thousands in merchandise at one time. They’re ruining it for everybody.

Also, for some reason, people are stealing “Tide” detergent. It is big, bulky, and heavy. What an odd thing to steal. Any clues as to why Tide is targeted?

Sometimes I find a billing error in my favor. I typically give the other party two tries to fix it. I’ll tell them there’s an error, but not that it’s in my favor. They often get short tempered because they think I’m complaining about being over-charged, instead of under-charged. That’s as far as I go.

^pussy!

I have an unintentional, and scary, shoplifting story.

In my late 20s I lived in China for about a year. My Chinese improved over time, but when I first arrived, I could communicate very little.

There was a store (mom-and-pop) not far from my apartment. (Very, very narrow "aisles" -- hardly any room to move. Merchandise jam-packed haphazardly on shelves. Etc.) One day I went in to browse. I decided to buy a ping pong paddle (there are tables everywhere). Well, I went up to check out, and it was clear the young cashier thought I had brought it in with me. And I couldn't tell him, "No, I want to buy it." I even tried to hand him money. He spoke no English and I ended up just walking out of the store.

It was strange, and later I got scared. I wanted to go back and pay for it, but I thought, "The risk of being accused of shoplifting in China is not worth it." The paddle cost under 10 yuan, if I remember. So ... less than $2.

Generally, I lived with that fear in China, the fear of being falsely accused of something I didn't do, or did unintentionally.

I had a truly terrible job at a local drugstore as a teenager. I stole a couple of toiletry items. But then I noticed I never even used those items. I think the universe was showing me it’s impossible to enjoy stolen things, so I was never tempted again.

I manage a family-owned specialty food store and had no idea before working there how little profit margins are for mom and pop places that don't have the buying power. Think about that before shoplifting in non-chains.

I stole a pack of gum from Safeway when I was 11. I still feel guilty about it.

Even chains can have a hard time with shoplifting. Here in San Francisco, Walgreens has closed several stores due to rampant "shrinkage." People walk in, fill their arms with stuff, and run right back out - the staff are told not to interfere.

They have decriminalized shoplifting in SF and Seattle by making the threshold really high for prosecution. There’s literally no penalty for shoplifting.

R18 very similar story. I took several packs of gum (I was 5 years old) from near the checkout counter and tried to get the cashier’s attention to pay to for the gum (I had absolutely no money, 5 year old logic). She ignored me, so I just walked out of the store. When I got home and told my mom how I got the gum, she took me back to the store and made me put back the gum and apologize. The cashier couldn’t have cared less. That was the beginnings

I once went into a whole-house "yard" sale. I wanted a specific book and a vase but realized I didn't have enough money for them--so I just walked out with them.

I used to steal from the Whole Foods hot bar on Sundays. I would fill one of those green plastic take out boxes with french toast, eggs, sausage, bacon, syrup and butter and lounge in bed watching Netflix all day. The pandemic ended all that. I don't think that hot bar is ever coming back, either.

R37 you type fat! ;)

I've never stolen anything but that didn't stop me from being profiled because I was black. I distinctly remember an incident at Kmart where I bought something in the automotive department (which was near the back of the store) and the clerk stapled my bag closed with the receipt attached. I left directly but was still stopped at the front door anyway where they ripped open the stapled bag while at least 3-5 white people walked right out of the store with unstapled bags! I vowed now to shop at Kmart and never did...now no one does.

Not exactly the point of this thread, R39.

There was a guy we called Freddy the Thief... he used to come to our office every Friday with a big bag full of stuff that "fell off the back of a truck." Nice stuff from Barney's, Bloomies, etc... ties, sweaters... price tags still on them... he'd sell it to the guys at my office for a quarter of the price...

Inadvertently. A couple times I've had stuff on the bottom of the shopping cart and forgot. But I didn't go back in and pay, mainly because of the inconvenience.

Does the casino count? I've walked around casinos with my free softdrink and seen money still in machines and taken it. Popped the little white slip into my pocket and cashed it out.

Three times I've been caught and asked to leave. Once they took me into the office and photocopied my i.d. They said, "We consider that stealing" and I said, "I don't".

Once I found a slip on the floor for $350.00

I once pulled into a gas station late at night and filled up my tank. This was in a small town I was passing through, so the tank worked without my putting in a credit card.

Then, I looked up and saw the gas station was closed. There was no way to pay.

I went home, happy I had a free full tank of gas. After a day went by, I started to feel guilty so I called the gas station and ended up paying.

Remember the shoplifting scandal from the Bush Administration.

One aide, Claude Allen, got caught buying products at Target, taking them home, and then returning to the store, taking the product off the shelves and trying to return it for the money.

Apparently, Allen was uber gay in college and suddenly became a straight homophobe once he went into politics

I know r40. I just went out on a tangent. It's one of those days. Back to regular programming...

R44's story is giving me some serious Tyrone Hankerson realness.

R39 I thought your post was fine. There was no need for you to be called out on it.

R40 is a triggered racist. Ignore.

I'm a thief, and a shitkicker.

And I want to be famous!

[quote] I don’t but I’ve heard self-checkouts make theft easier than ever before.

Next time you are in the self checkout line, look up, you will most likely see black mirrored tiles in the ceiling, those are the cameras watching your every move.

You have to be a fool to shop lift today there are cameras everywhere and you will never see them most of time but they see you.

I have never shoplifted but I do have to pay for the shit all of you steal with increased prices. Stores aren't just going to absorb that loss, they pass it onto the people who pay. Any store that doesn't will go out of business.

R50 = buzz kill. OOh, I'm the voice of reason! OOh, I understand how macro-economic trends work! Ooh, I'm so smart.

(just fucking' with ya, R50. You are absolutely correct the consumer ends up eating the cost of shoplifting).

I ring up Some of my produce for lower priced items. It’s easy to play dumb if you get caught. That’s what they get for making us work for them.

There are cameras at self checkouts but you can still steal stuff.

I've never stolen stuff but there have been times where the self check didn't register a item right and I just sent it down the line anyway. As R52 pointed out, it can be done. I am honest as long as the thing works for me but I have no guilt about getting a free item or a cheaper price if their system doesn't have a UPC in or something.

Not worried about increased prices when you can just shoplift. Everything is so cheap anyway.

I’m aware of the cameras, I frequently chat with the store employees as I’m shoplifting. Especially at the candle shop, she’s so dumb.

I used to do similar things when I was in my poor vegan college days, R52. At Henry's/Sprouts I used to write the code for cornnmeal instead of nuritional yeast in the bulk section. I think I did the same thing for pine-nuts but got caught once and played dumb.

In college, I wanted this pot of succulents at Target, so I stuck a clearance label on it. At the checkout, the super queen checker with diamond earrings said, “hmmmm...this price seems a little too good...” and let me get away with it.

OP you sound like you're suffering from clinical depression. You also deserve to be horse whipped.

I’ve already been diagnosed with that, and go to therapy once a week. I haven’t really been talking about shoplifting since there are more pressing issues, such as the fact that I hate working in corporate America, but continue to do so because I love money.

I wrote this on here once before: I was at Kroger's late night and went to self checkout. As I was putting my groceries in a bag I noticed a carton of eggs already in there. I thought what the hell and kept on bagging.

At some point a Clerk came up and said a customer forgot her eggs at my station. I said, "Oh, really?". So I started fishing around and found them. I finished bagging (the Clerk didn't say a word).

On my way out two little college girls were waiting in the vestibule and gave me a silent death stare, and I figured one was my egg lady.

R59 - if you look absent minded or are an eldergay, he probably didn't say anything out of pity for the sadness that is senility.

R42- Ive found chips and slips on the floor of a casino also, and the pit boss told me - finders keepers. The dealers and pit bosses physically wont touch any casino currency - I even tried to give it to a blackjack dealer to put in the tip box, and she couldn’t accept it unless I was sitting at the table playing, and even then it has to be placed on the felt.

R56's checkout queen sounds black and fabulous. He KNEW who you are bitch and told you. Ha ha love it. You win.

OP - if you are doing this at your age and at a candle store...run, don't walk to your therapist and tell them. Good grief...how embarrassing ffs man, you aren't 14! Pull yourself together. You don't do that shit out of respect for yourself...even snickering that the dumb kid at the candle place is being fooled is just making you look worse. At least that kid is there earning something honestly not stealing candles in middle age.

Never have I ever. Though I did forget a ginger root at the bottom of my cart at Whole Foods once because it was so small and yes, I took it back

Occasionally, I go to the self checkout and select the cheaper non-organic vegetables and ring them up when it's actually the organic I have.

Does that count?

That “kid” selling candles is annoying, so not stopping anytime soon. Maybe she’ll have to get a corporate job once I steal enough candles. Maybe she’ll be one of my direct reports. That would be très amusing.

[R65] Yes it counts and Jesus is watching you do it.

For a common thief, you seem terribly proud of yourself, OP.

All of us in corporate America are whoring ourselves out for our pimp, so what’s a little theft on the side? As Cristal Connors said about us all being whores:

“ We all are. We take the cash, we cash the check, we show them what they want to see!”

In the early days of self-checkout, I found $75 in the “cash back” slot (someone clearly forgot to take theirs). Nowadays they have a message, light or sound that flashes to remind you so I doubt it’s a common occurrence anymore. If I hadn’t taken it, someone else would have (including a store employee or manager).

You go girl!

OK, OP, can I come over and take some of your stuff?

Sure, but I’ll have to use my machete on you.

Only when I brought something at the market and they clearly overcharged me; I'd figure it out after I looked at the receipt once I got home. If they did overcharge me, I'd pocket something once I go back.

Why, r73? You're richer than I am, doesn't that entitle me to some of your stuff?

OP, trashy and poor and stealing frau items. What a catch!

I was a cashier in a restaurant and the boss hated me. I saw him slip money into my register one day and when I counted out I was over. So I sent it up to security in an envelope as was protocol. My boss asked me if my register was over and I told him no. I knew it was a set up. He almost danced a jig right in front of me. The next day I was called into security and interrogated. They asked if I was over and I said yes, I sent it to you. They were so sure I was a thief and hadn't even checked based on what my boss told them. I made them all look like fools. Very satisfying. My boss ended up being fired for something or other. And I was offered a job in security which I turned down.

I shoplifted whenever I was young. Got caught by a guard and he made me suck his dick

I used to LOVE shoplifting when I was in my early twenties.

Have you ever been caught?

You try to be Hedy Lamarr when you're only Rex Teed

I do not shoplift. I sneak lousy merchandise with very high price tags into quality shops and place it in the focus display areas.

I'm driving our local Saks out of business.

I call it "fashion art."

You ARE a whore darlin’!

OP is deranged and needs to move to Saudi Arabia and try that shit there. The candle and the hand holding it will soon be a memory.

It's not a stealing story. I used to work in a coffee shop. A gentleman came into the store and I served him coffee and he paid for it. During the transaction, we talked the entire time.

Later that morning, he called the coffee shop and asked if he had indeed paid for the coffee. I told him he paid but he didn't seem to believe me. He recalled our interaction and said that we had been talking the whole time and he didn't recall paying. Again, I insisted he had paid. He finally gave up. I think he still believed he hadn't paid, and he didn't believe me when I verified he had.

Only once did I try it (outside of "sampling" small produce & bulk candy).

It was an "Exercise for Men Only" magazine, at a Walmart, in the summer of 1996. I felt I was being watched, so I put it down before leaving. Sure enough, a guy stopped & berated me at the front of the store, demanding to know specifically what title I'd tried to steal.

He was obviously going out of his way to take on a homophobic bullying tone, so I never gave him the satisfaction of my admitting it was a magazine that obviously targeted gay men. Why? I absolutely think he knew what it was, but wanted me to admit it, and I outright refused.

The worst part is that if I hadn't felt shame about my same-sex muscle lust, I could've purchased the damned thing. I was only sixteen, but it wasn't porn, and I had plenty of money in my wallet.

I lived in LA during the Northridge earthquake. Aftershocks were endless for a week afterwards, and I was a bundle of nerves, unable to sleep or eat. I was going to drive to Vegas to escape for a few days, and on my way out of town stopped for a glorious big lunch at a nice restaurant. I was exhausted and starving, my server was so sweet, but I was so spacy that I completely forgot to pay. I didn't even realize until maybe six months later and by then I wasn't even sure where the place was any more.

R87 - that happens with the elderly a lot. Usually the staff can tell who is a thief or just old and "out of it".

If Goop had a bricks and mortar store, I could imagine lots of candles being 'shrunk'.

I was a new wave/punk kid in the 80's, and, despite having plenty of money, was often given the shittiest customer service in major department stores. So I'd lift merchandise in retaliation.

I've never taken anything from a shop, but I've occasionally pilfered from employers over the years, small things no one would notice.

I put a few things in my bag every time I’m at the supermarket. It’s pretty safe to do so here in Australia... they let you get away with it, and if not the penalties are very soft. Stealing from other places is a bit different/riskier. I generally stick to supermarkets aside from a couple occasions where I’ve stolen expensive booze from liquor stores when already very drunk and feeling especially naughty.

WTF is wrong with you people?

Must be an American thing.

Shoplifters behold.

That's true, R26. They're called BLM protestors now.

OP, no matter how you rationalize it, you're still just a common fat thief.

R93 see R92.

R92, do you think this lax approach to thievery is because Australians are the descendants of criminals, debtors and scoundrels?

Gosh, R98, I hope you weren't trying to be insightful and intellectual with that response.

Maybe it’s an effort not to clog up the court systems. Between the ease of shoplifting, summer arriving and lack of covid it’s a pretty good time to be a studly descendant of scoundrels in my sexual prime.

Black Friday would probably be an excellent time to do some casual shoplifting.

Gosh, R99, you must be a real blast at parties.

R98

Gosh, what will you comment next R102? “Play stupid games, win stupid prizes”? Go back to reddit

I have security remove the rent boys without paying them when I'm done.

That's a bit like shoplifting, isn't it?

[quote]  I make well over $100K

No, you don't.

Why, did you need me to get something for you, dear? I'm in and out of any store unseen in just seconds..!

If you’re white and clean and friendly, you can shoplift a few items every time you go into a supermarket as long as you’re discreet about it and buying other stuff, and nobody will suspect or notice. Sad, but true.

I work a job where we are allowed to give out self selected Tiffany gifts to our customers at the close of a home sales transaction. I have ordered extra gifts or forgot to give other Tiffany wrapped gifts out to our buyers and simply took them home with me. Its like a fucking sickness. I have 10 or more BIG blue gift wrapped boxes with crystal platters, crystal decanter, crystal old fashion glasses, and beautiful glass bowls all over my home in storage. Like a fucking hoarder. I just brought one gift to a friends for a Thanksgiving gift - Everyone thinks I'm "So Fancy" What the hell am I gonna do with all this stuff?

Lol!! I do sometimes.

Nothing wrong with a little "five-finger discount," no matter how much you make!

r108 Do you just sit and LOOK at all those Tiffany blue boxes?

R108, have you considered selling them? Seems like the obvious solution. They also sound like nice gifts so why not keep a few for special occasions?

I shoplifted when I was a teenager, I stopped before I turned 18. I never got caught. I've even walked out of stores holding something in my hand forgetting I had picked it up, no one ever said anything.

When I was about 9 I opened a box of cereal in a supermarket to get the prize toy. At the time I didn't consider that cheating because the prize was free. But of course it still is stealing.

It’s harder when you are non white

I do not currently, and have not for years. But I did have a stretch in my early 20s where I was stealing from my employer, an upscale department store. Thankfully I was never caught. I actually think they were onto me, but for whatever reason they just didn't care all that much; there was a case out of our store where a woman pilfered some $100k plus in high-end goods over the course of several months, so I was probably small potatoes. I just simply do not believe I was the surreptitious, brilliant thief I thought myself. I later on worked at a Marshall Fields and they gave us a tour of the LP facilities. The surveillance system they had was crazy-sophisticated, with cameras that could zoom in on the smallest specks on the floor. That observation right there snapped me out of any theft. I simply didn't know how advanced systems were.

A few years ago, a good childhood friend and I were out and about shopping. We were in some trashy thrift shop. I noticed she switched out her crappy shoes for a new pair of boots. It was one of the saddest things I had ever seen. These new boots were maybe $15, and she was stealing them, and leaving her nasty shoes in the box. It was appalling. If I ever thought of stealing again, I would always remember that sad pathetic moment of my friend stealing a pair of Jessica Simpson boots, selling for $15.

What are you bitches shoplifting for Black Friday? Big ticket items or small?

I work for Harris Teeter supermarkets as a manager, and while the company pays lip service to shoplifting prevention, at the store level we don’t really look for it constantly, or pay that much attention to it unless it’s over-the-top egregious cases, or clumsy morons literally getting caught red-handed because they’re so obvious and bad at it. In 6 years I’ve maybe busted and kicked out about ten people, and that was because I literally happened to walk up on most of them in the act, and I’ve only actually called the cops twice. Half the time we don’t even remember to record the surveillance stuff, and nobody ever looks at it except as a daily checklist item. I’m sure it varies region to region or even company to company, but at my store and the stores I’m familiar with in my area, we’re basically spread too thin and too busy with a million other things to be constantly roving around sniffing out petty thieves pocketing a can of tuna or a little box of wine or whatever.

I got another candle! Black Friday sale! 100% off!

Worst employer of the year and I wanted to get even. The store just opened and I worked at Kenneth Cole at the Forum Shoppes in Caesars in Vegas as an Asst Manager. I knew I was gonna quit, so I went on a spree. I would return a majority of the CASH sales in less than 24 hours and pocket the money. Then, one time late night the alarm went off. I got the call to return the store at like 1:00 in the morning. No one was in the mall, and I took bags of stuff. I need up quitting like 2 weeks later. Im sure they had a inventory nightmare. PS - I don't regret it one bit. They treated us so bad, as far as I was concerned, they deserved it.

A friend worked in a coffee shop that also had a vending machine that was outside the shop, in a closed off space, but accessible 24 hours.

She had to go in late one weekend for inventory and saw that the machine's glass had been bashed and a few candy bars stolen. Before she called the police, she called me and another friend. We grabbed ALL the candy in the machine and left.

She then called the police and claimed the window had been bashed in and all the candy stolen

R65 - yes bitch it will count to all of us queens who later get prostate cancer because your pilfering is upping the cost of organic produce and we are forced to buy pesticide-infusions called "vegetables" because of guys like you. So sleep well with all of DL's collective prostates on your conscience.

Occasionally, for the thrill of it. I used to be in loss prevention so I know what they are looking for.

This isn’t quite “shoplifting” but it’s related to shopping and grifting:

If you clip physical grocery store coupons from the Sunday paper, or wherever, it happens that coupons usually aren’t really applicable to the item on the coupon. They actually get applied to any item from the manufacturer. For example, if you have a coupon worth $5 off a $50 Procter & Gamble product, and you don’t buy that product, but you do buy a $6 item from Procter & Gamble, the coupon will be applied towards the $6 item.

If you use self-checkout, after scanning a coupon that you might wish you could hang on to it for future use, you can scan it, then you’re next suppose to put it into the collection box for used coupons, but you can insert a useless coupon into the collection box slot, and save the original coupon for later use. I buy in bulk, so I could just give the register clerk a pile of coupons and they don’t bother verifying that you got the specified item or a substitute. If you’re just buying a few items, the clerk might notice, though.

I used to reliably save about 15% off my groceries, using coupons. I don’t get a physical newspaper anymore, so I don’t clip coupons anymore.

shoplifting causes prostate cancer....MARY!!!

I’ve told this story here before, I think. I used to work in a high end department store in cosmetics. People used to steal the expensive creams and then try to return them filled with Vaseline or cold cream. One time, though, an incel type tried to return a jar of La Mer filled with cum.

I was a busboy in a restaurant in Ptown. One day, the head waiter, Scott, who made the schedule, told me I had to work on my pre-scheduled day off. I told him that I worked on my last three days off, and needed the break, so I was not going to work on my upcoming day off. (When it rains in Ptown, the restaurants get swamped, and there isn’t a lot of recreational things to do, so it’s win-win to work on rainy days.)

Scott didn’t like that and said, “So, you’re quitting then?”,

Me: “No, I’m just taking my day off”

Scott: “Then you’re quitting”

When the owner heard this, she asked why I was quitting. I responded, “Scott fired me”. She replied “Scott can’t fire anyone”. So that was that.

The head waiter always assigned himself the most lucrative shifts, and never did the set-up work for the next shift, that we had to do. As a busboy, I kept track of how the waiters distributed their tips to me, and Scott was the lowest tipper every day for the last few months, a statistical impossibility.

One day, Scott left early, as usual, and I found he neglected to take a paid check from a deuce, and bring it to the register. They left him more than 20% as a tip, too. I pocketed the check and the money. A few weeks later, he approached me one the street and looked stressed. He said the owners found they were missing a check, and were withholding the cost of the dinner from his final paycheck. He asked if I knew anything about it. I responded, “I have no idea what you’re talking about”, in a way that communicated that I absolutely took the check and, no, I wasn’t giving it back to him. From his deflated reaction, he knew it, too.

It was fun not just to keep the money, but make it clear to Scott that I had done so.

I returned an unopened can of paint to Home Depot. It’s practically impossible to empty a can of paint without getting some paint on the exterior side of the can. Nonetheless, the clerk at Home Depot opened the paint can to make sure I hadn’t emptied it of paint, and refilled the can with water. I asked, “do people do that?”, and apparently they do.

I shoplift all of the time. I get such a rush each time. It also makes me horny as hell after the “get”. I haven’t been caught

I was hungry and broke.

I am not involved in criminal activity in any way, shape or form!

It so easy to steal airplants from the Home Depot, just take out the tag and put it into your pocket. Why the fuck are they 15-20 dollars each?

My local grocery store has those guns where you scan your groceries as you shop and just put them in your bag right away. I admit sometimes, especially when I’m buying gourmet ingredients, I’ll pretend to scan it and put it in my bag. I don’t feel bad about it. I’m not paying $30 for a chunk of Parmesan cheese.

Good for you! No one should pay that much for cheese. It’s highway robbery.

Home Depot is the best place to shoplift. I’ve taken lamps before and huge plants before.

How do the shoplifting rings do it? Do they have someone on the inside? I used to work in a big box store and once I was there a while I figured out who the plain-clothed loss prevention people were. The people I saw caught were teenage girls, mostly.

Did it once. I was in my 30s, and and had just seen the movie Crimes and Misdemeanors, and was thinking about crime, and whether you really could get away with it. I decided to shoplift, just for the experience. I went into an eyeglass boutique in Scottsdale, AZ, and tried on a few pairs, and just held some $300 Oliver Peeples in my hand, in plain view, as I walked around trying things on. I carried them out the door without a second glance from anyone. If I had been stopped, I would have laughed and said I forgot they were in my hand. It was neither a thrill, nor a concern, so that was that.