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I fucking HATE Zoom

Zoom is everything I feared would happen. Now we can't just make simple phone-calls. It isn't enough. Now we have to videoconference ourselves as we talk to everybody about even the most simple, monotonous things.

Sometimes a bitch just wants to make a simple phone call after rolling out of bed or tell a little white lie about where they are!

by Anonymousreply 6102/22/2021

OP = Jeffrey Toobin

by Anonymousreply 110/21/2020

You do realize that you don't need to turn your camera on.

by Anonymousreply 210/21/2020

Welcome to Datalounge, Mr. Toobin.

by Anonymousreply 310/21/2020

I've mastered zooming after rolling out of bed. I simply fly to some exotic destination the night before. Tonight I'm on Ilha da Queimada Grande. My hair and makeup people are in nearby tents. They will get up in the morning and start working me while I'm still asleep. Usually, I awaken while they are manipulating me, but my doctor shoots me with propofol, so next thing I know, I'm all pretty and on camera and wide awake and ready for my audience. My co-workers have no idea what goes on behind the scenes.

by Anonymousreply 410/21/2020

[quote] I fucking HATE Zoom

Then try Microsoft Teams.

by Anonymousreply 510/21/2020

R2: And be the only weirdo not on camera? No, everybody wants to see that you're "present" and paying attention and engaged in these boring tedious conversations

by Anonymousreply 610/21/2020

the last time it was cool

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 710/21/2020

Zoom is rather odd. It magnifies everybody's body language and facial expressions in ways you wouldn't pay much attention to in real life. It's all very staged and certainly no substitute for real face-to-face interaction, but well, during these times, it's all we've got.

by Anonymousreply 810/21/2020

Does Zoom allow you to have a virtual background? The Verizon product BlueJeans.com has a nice feature that allows you to choose a greenscreen-type background. They have a few standard ones - office-like and tropical beach are two - but you can also choose your own pictures. It's sort of fun, actually.

That doesn't stop you having to comb your hair, shave and dress from the waist up ("but not from the waist down! Ha ha ha!" - J. Toobin), but at least you can stop worrying about being in the cleanest and most presentable part of your home.

by Anonymousreply 910/21/2020

We thankfully don’t turn our cameras on.

by Anonymousreply 1010/21/2020

Girl, didn't the Jetson's prepare you for this?

by Anonymousreply 1110/21/2020

I'm stuck on Zoom and Teams all day in back to back meetings with drooling mouth breathing morons! Horrible!. The only benefit to Zoom over Teams is that on Zoom you can see all the participants. On Teams you are limited to 9 even if you have a 100 people in the meeting, at lest as far as I can tell in the settings. My IT people were useless.

by Anonymousreply 1210/21/2020

How can you keep from looking at yourself? It's distracting.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 1310/21/2020

OP, just pretend you're on the Brady Bunch intro.

by Anonymousreply 1410/21/2020

I’m great at makeup. Have always had a talent for makeup application. When I’m not wearing makeup people say “You look horrible. You should go to bed & get some rest.” A few times I talked to my doctors over the phone without makeup on and they were extremely concerned. Now I go to their offices. If I’m going to have to put on makeup, I might as well leave the house & come to see you in person.

Years ago I had a problem in my shower & it flooded the apartment downstairs. The woman who lived there came up & screamed at me nonstop. I had just stepped out of the shower & was running late for work. I said, “I’m sorry but I have to go to work. I will come see you after work and we can talk about damages.”

When I went to see her after work, she didn’t believe I was the same person & insisted on seeing the person she talked to in the morning. “She wasn’t attractive like you, she was kind of ugly.”

The difference? Makeup.

by Anonymousreply 1510/21/2020

I meant telemedicine phone calls to my doctors, obviously

by Anonymousreply 1610/21/2020

Are you hallucinating?

by Anonymousreply 1710/21/2020

I am actually spending more time in Zoom meetings since the lock down than I did with in-person meetings before. And I had too many meetings before. For me it's become counterproductive, since I have so little time left to actually do all the work and projects I need to do, so I end up working some evenings and weekends to make up for it.

Fuck Zoom.

by Anonymousreply 1810/21/2020

[quote] Sometimes a bitch just wants to make a simple phone call after rolling out of bed or tell a little white lie about where they are!

Whore!

by Anonymousreply 1910/21/2020

Bernadette rocked.

by Anonymousreply 2010/21/2020

Zoom is management's strategy to micromanage you even more.

by Anonymousreply 2110/21/2020

Just pause (think freeze frame!) in front of your screen- they'll think your connection froze.

by Anonymousreply 2210/21/2020

It's just a showcase for fraus to "accidentally" parade their crotchfruit so you can say how cute they are and validate the frau's life.

by Anonymousreply 2310/21/2020

I was recently on a Zoom where a coworker chain smoked a least 4 cigs. There was smoke billowing around his head. At first I thought his monitor was on fire- then he took a drag.

by Anonymousreply 2410/21/2020

r15 ????????????

by Anonymousreply 2510/21/2020

[quote] On Teams you are limited to 9 even if you have a 100 people in the meeting, at lest as far as I can tell in the settings. My IT people were useless.

Teams has introduced "Gallery view" that lets you see many more on the screen at one time. You have to update Teams and then click a setting buried deep inside. As much as Zoom and Teams suck, I prefer virtual meetings to having to be in the same room as people.

by Anonymousreply 2610/21/2020

[quote]Does Zoom allow you to have a virtual background?

Yes, but your head moves in and out of the background in a distracting manner. I end up covering those faces with the chat box.

by Anonymousreply 2710/21/2020

R2 is Jeffrey Toobin

by Anonymousreply 2810/21/2020

I liked ZOOM on PBS in the 1970's.

by Anonymousreply 2910/21/2020

As an old fart, I've exercised my option not to learn a new technology and so decline all Zoom invitations.

by Anonymousreply 3010/21/2020

Fraus love it.

by Anonymousreply 3110/21/2020

It gives fraus an excuse to check out your home.

by Anonymousreply 3210/21/2020

R32- That's what I do too. So much BAD TASTE. We should do a Tasteful Friends Zoom edition.

by Anonymousreply 3310/22/2020

I have a friend who HAS to have her camera on and be dressed in professional attire from the waist up. My office just started requiring us to have our cameras on for meetings. Ugh. Most days I rarely put pants on...NOT in a Toobin kind of way, though.

by Anonymousreply 3410/22/2020

This thread is very concerning.

by Anonymousreply 3510/22/2020

R26 Why the fuck would you want that?

by Anonymousreply 3610/22/2020

Can not stand Zoom. You are held hostage to whoever is hogging the mike and bloviating on and on and on. I'm with the camp that says not to put it on video. I like to mute as well. This way I can multi-task. I get a lot of shit done while listening to Zoom calls like they're podcasts.

Now I have friends and acquaintances inviting me to "Zoom parties". "Woohoo! Grab a glass of wine and let's have some virtual fun". 🤮 They obviously don't work or are in jobs where they don't have to Zoom. Ugh. Bitch, I'm in Zoom meetings all week, I have ZERO interest in a Zoom party.

by Anonymousreply 3710/22/2020

It makes me wonder what ungodly hour some of the Millennial women in the office must wake up to be dressed up with makeup and lighting for a 6 am meeting.

by Anonymousreply 3810/22/2020

R9, yes.....and no. There are two ways:

1. If you have an actual, physical, green-screen behind you, you can choose a virtual background

2. If you do not have a green-screen you can still have a virtual background ONLY IF your device meets certain equipment specs, mostly having to do with the speed and age of your processor

Unlike Microsoft Teams, Zoom does not simply allow you to blur your background.

by Anonymousreply 3910/22/2020

What R37 said.

by Anonymousreply 4010/22/2020

Does anyone else find the softening filter on Zoom really odd? I turned it on the other day and I swear it softened my cheekbones and jawline to the point I looked like a talking ballon. I had no contours at all.

by Anonymousreply 4110/22/2020

Is this a real post? Just tell people that you’re not doing video. I have never seen anyone make an issue of this.

People are acting like video conferencing is new. Millions have been using this technology for years. Do you think we are all sitting on meetings all day with the video running? Fuck no. I hardly turn mine on at all. Maybe if I’m interviewing someone.

by Anonymousreply 4210/22/2020

I always knew Skype and Facetime would lead to this inevitability.

by Anonymousreply 4310/22/2020

Fuck You!!!

by Anonymousreply 4410/22/2020

People who don't turn their cameras on are creepy.

by Anonymousreply 4510/22/2020

Bump

by Anonymousreply 4602/22/2021

Yet another invasion of privacy. Have to put clothes on and look human for asinine assholes I would never answer the damn door to if I had a choice.

by Anonymousreply 4702/22/2021

They get in the way of me actually performing my job

by Anonymousreply 4802/22/2021

I shut my screen off.

Duh.

by Anonymousreply 4902/22/2021

R49 I tried that. I get guilt tripped by my idiot manager (who should’ve been let go a long time ago for being abusive and incompetent)

by Anonymousreply 5002/22/2021

I'm in the office maybe 2 times a week and my boss insisted I buy a Webcam for any meetings that happen to take place while I'm in the office. My desktop at work doesn't have a camera.

by Anonymousreply 5102/22/2021

Why even use Zoom? My company just uses phone meetings. No need to see each other.

by Anonymousreply 5202/22/2021

We use webex and teams and 9 times out of 10 people are on camera...one meeting we spent 20 minutes looking at everyone’s Christmas trees...Don’t get me started, Don’t EVEN get me started!

by Anonymousreply 5302/22/2021

I find I am doing video calls where normally it would have been a phone meeting but now companies don’t want to pay for conference lines and there are no extra charges for video calls.

by Anonymousreply 5402/22/2021

Most companies (or at least most of the ones my friends and family work at) have gotten over having the camera on for many internal meetings.

For instance, I have a twice-weekly meeting with two guys who I'm managing a project with (we all have different pieces.) Back in September we just decided we'd keep it on Zoom but with cameras off so we could do other things while on the call-- I usually walk my dog during that call since I don't need to have any sort of screen open, it's just to update each other.

And Zoom backgrounds mean you don't have to worry about your background and can actually sit on the couch during a long call (just prop your laptop on a couple of books.)

by Anonymousreply 5502/22/2021

The work places of the people I know that use Zoom say that they don’t use the video during meetings - they just use the profile pictures that show up whenever someone speaks.

by Anonymousreply 5602/22/2021

R49 Why is not having video creepy? I hate staring at everyone’s face and they damn sure don’t want to see mine.

by Anonymousreply 5702/22/2021

I have poor cell phone service where I am. That’s the only reason I zoom everything. I agree with OP that it has creeped too far but it’s not avoidable for me. This was not a problem at the office when we had landlines.

by Anonymousreply 5802/22/2021

My company has fucking zoom lunches every two weeks. Imagine sitting there watching all these fatties stuffing their faces, food dangling from their lips. It’s disgusting - and my boss insists I attend them.

by Anonymousreply 5902/22/2021

I LOOK SO FUCKING FAT ON ZOOM

by Anonymousreply 6002/22/2021

Fanny Dooley loves Zoom but hates Skype and Teams.

by Anonymousreply 6102/22/2021
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