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DLAnon

The thread where we come up with DLish conspiracy theories.

Theorize away, moppets!

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by Anonymousreply 44Last Sunday at 1:19 PM

SARS-CoV-2 is a biological weapon that escaped from Cheryl's pussy.

It couldn't take it anymore.

by Anonymousreply 1Last Saturday at 12:22 PM

Rudy Ghoul-iani is a reanimated corpse and a Russian spy.

by Anonymousreply 2Last Saturday at 12:23 PM

Timothee Chalamet and Armie Hammer weren't acting in CMBYN

There are actually deeply in love and having a torrid undercover gay love affair.

by Anonymousreply 3Last Saturday at 12:26 PM

The earth is flat! 😂

by Anonymousreply 4Last Saturday at 12:30 PM

Bonnie Franklin is coming back from the dead to help Trump catch pedophiles!

by Anonymousreply 5Last Saturday at 12:32 PM

Have you see Muriel lately? She tried to tell me she's been on the watermelon diet. Does she think I'm stupid?

That bitch is back on the adrenochrome.

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by Anonymousreply 6Last Saturday at 12:34 PM

Ryan Murphy saw Sarah Paulson murder someone and he's been blackmailing her into appearing in all of his shows.

by Anonymousreply 7Last Saturday at 12:34 PM

[quote] Ryan Murphy saw Sarah Paulson murder someone

Was that someone Olivia de Havilland?

by Anonymousreply 8Last Saturday at 12:36 PM

Andy Cohen decides who gets to be a bartender on his show by playing juvenile jerk off games on the weekends with several prospects. But he's just watching and decides who wins.

by Anonymousreply 9Last Saturday at 12:41 PM

The reason Trump has such a limited vocabulary and difficulty with sentence structure is because the real Trump has been locked in a mental institution since 1991 and this guy playing “President” is a Russian native KGB agent who was given plastic surgery to look like the orig.

by Anonymousreply 10Last Saturday at 12:42 PM

Trump drank Barron's cum to cure himself of COVID. And now Barron has to drink Jared's cum to cure himself as well.

by Anonymousreply 11Last Saturday at 12:44 PM

Trump is the third coming of Christ! And boy is he pissed!

by Anonymousreply 12Last Saturday at 12:46 PM

There is a secret gay society in Hollywood. It's called the Pasta Drainers. They take great joy in pouring the precious hot pasta water into the sink. Those deviant monsters! They come together in secrecy every fortnite where they put on holy aprons and cook dozens of pots of pasta and then cackle like witches when they pour the hot water into the sink. Since they are gays they don't do carbs so the pasta gets thrown out as well.

by Anonymousreply 13Last Saturday at 12:49 PM

JFK Jr is no longer coming back from the dead to help Trump catch pedophiles. Jackie persuaded her cousin Little Edie to go in JFK Jr's place

by Anonymousreply 14Last Saturday at 1:42 PM

Madonna IS the actual Madonna and Rocco is the second coming of Jesus.

Rocco and Jesus each have 5 letters and the second consonant is repeated twice in each of their names

Rocco is a popular name in Italy and Jesus is a popular name with Latinos-- both Mediterranean people

"Like A Virgin" is a clue that she is the real Madonna

Guy and God each start with "G" and have three letters

Do the research DLers and it will all be clear.

by Anonymousreply 15Last Saturday at 2:31 PM

The reanimated corpses of Charles Nelson Reilly and Brett Somers are kidnapping babies and sacrificing them to Cthulhu

by Anonymousreply 16Last Saturday at 3:08 PM

Rocco Ritchie is NOT Jesus

by Anonymousreply 17Last Saturday at 7:26 PM

Paul Lynde will rise from the dead and save us all

by Anonymousreply 18Last Saturday at 7:32 PM

We have to wait for the Apocalypse until Betty White dies. You know, the four horsemen. Or as we know them: The Four Golden Girls of the Apocalypse.

by Anonymousreply 19Last Sunday at 3:13 AM

Have you ever seen me in the same room with Muriel?

Think about that for a while.

by Anonymousreply 20Last Sunday at 3:16 AM

You fuckers are slipping. No mention of the Reptilian, shape-shifting British Royal Family??? You have to get them in the mirror, of course.

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by Anonymousreply 21Last Sunday at 3:17 AM

Trump Models was a high end escort agency.

by Anonymousreply 22Last Sunday at 3:41 AM

For ONCE on Datalounge, R1 is correct and not just being pointlessly cunty.

by Anonymousreply 23Last Sunday at 3:53 AM

R15 is brilliant!

by Anonymousreply 24Last Sunday at 4:50 AM

I don't think we need go past the storied My Foam Mattress Made me Shit the Bed thread.

by Anonymousreply 25Last Sunday at 5:03 AM

Obama and Hillary made me put my bread in the refrigerator and now I get dizzy spells and the whim whams.

by Anonymousreply 26Last Sunday at 6:03 AM

Thank you R24

by Anonymousreply 27Last Sunday at 6:07 AM

More theories please R15!

by Anonymousreply 28Last Sunday at 6:20 AM

Gap Playlist Guy secretly hates the Gap.

Also the Darfur Orphan is a scam set up by Montel Williams to swindle seniors out of their social security money.

by Anonymousreply 29Last Sunday at 7:25 AM

When you see the Goodyear Blimp in the sky, it’s releasing “Chem Trails” that actually are responsible for American’s weight gain. It’s an advertising ploy to turn people into the actual product. Similar to the creation of helicopter parents.

by Anonymousreply 30Last Sunday at 7:35 AM

r22 that one is true.

The Timotay stans are part of the Satanic pedo cabal. LOOK IT UP SHEEPLE>>

by Anonymousreply 31Last Sunday at 8:03 AM

The Saudis are running a troll campaign on DL to convert us all to Islam so they can combat the gay agenda at its source. They mostly hire bisexual Asian-Canadian women who are obsessed with the Royals and D-list twinks- and combatting Islamaphobia! That's why they speak with so much confidence on how empowering the hijab is.

by Anonymousreply 32Last Sunday at 8:07 AM

Madonna's new Madame X perfume is actually Frederic Malle's Portrait of a Lady in cheap Walmart packaging. Frederic retaliated by paying her dermatologist to inject her with bathroom caulk from The Home Depot instead of Restylane.

by Anonymousreply 33Last Sunday at 8:12 AM

Jacob Wohl, Tucker Carlson, and Ann Coulter are hippy performance artists from San Francisco who have been plotting to make Republicans look bad and destroy the American right

by Anonymousreply 34Last Sunday at 8:15 AM

Datalounge is a left wing plot designed to convince Americans that gay men are just a bunch of middle class Flyoverstani maiden aunts whose harmless pursuits include potato salad, pasta draining and The Golden Girls. They mean to convince the world that gays are powerless and just as clueless about the worlds of high fashion, technology, finance and law as everyone else in Flyoverstan. They are trying to hide the fact that The Gays are actually part of the sophisticated urban elite, foist needless fashions and technology onto America and play a key role in law and finance.

by Anonymousreply 35Last Sunday at 9:00 AM

WRONG R35!!

Datalounge is a MUSLIM/RIGHT WING plot designed to convince Americans that gay men are just a bunch of middle class Flyoverstani maiden aunts whose harmless pursuits include potato salad, pasta draining and The Golden Girls.

It's part of the same plot that foists RuPaul's Drag Race, Jazz Jennings and Cam from Modern Family on to the American people to convince the American public that gay men are just women in the wrong bodies.

That is so that no one objects when they send us to camps and trans us!

by Anonymousreply 36Last Sunday at 9:03 AM

Gap Playlist Guy is really Robbie Mook (he has a lot of time on his hands these days)

The playlists are actually secret coded messages to Hillary and her cabal of child-molesting lesbians including Liza Minelli, Cher, Lady Gaga, Tina Turner and Megan Markle.

They keep their victims in the basement of an organic food store in Park Slope before transporting them to the Isle of Lesbos in Greece.

Bernie Sanders and Susan Sarandon are working to help stop them and during The Menses, they will lead an uprising that will free the child slaves and their army, commanded by Generals Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and Mindy Cohn will reign victorious.

by Anonymousreply 37Last Sunday at 9:50 AM

The gay agenda is real

Working out of their secret lair in Skaneateles, NY, David Muir and Andy Cohen are planning to turn all of America GAY!

by Anonymousreply 38Last Sunday at 9:53 AM

Trump can only get an erection by licking the brains of hillbillies who are driven into a manic state. Desperate for an orgasm, his balls swollen to critical mass, he finally found a narrative that would drive them completely wild — a toxic blend of racism, hatred of education and knowledge, and churlish nativism.

He tried it out on a crowd of shitkickers. After the rally, a random Verne was abducted, a hole drilled in his skull, and Trump’s tongue eagerly sought the hole. Moments later his thing rose up like a throbbing cannon, his face turned beet red, Ivanka lightly stroked it twice with her bejeweled talons, and it exploded, gushing jism like Old Faithful.

Once his frenzied grunting subsided and he returned to his senses, Trump was filled with a new sense of resolve, a new mission. And he would never stop campaigning.

by Anonymousreply 39Last Sunday at 10:03 AM

oh my god r33 almost made me choke. That one is my favorite so far.

by Anonymousreply 40Last Sunday at 10:44 AM

Hold the phone, we have a new contender at r39. GENIUS.

r40

by Anonymousreply 41Last Sunday at 10:45 AM

5-10-22. Is it real? G-U-M.

Watch. They aspire?

Cold at noon, hot in September. It's happening, the time is planned.

TBS 411430AM

Check your local listings.

by Anonymousreply 42Last Sunday at 11:03 AM

JFK Jr. is not "coming back" to help Trump win the election, but surprisingly, Harvey Milk is. Milk was promised the Trump-created position of "Super-Special Gay Guy Who I Just Love" if he'd spearhead Trump's new "Bullets Aren't That Dangerous; They Don't Really Kill You" campaign. Elon Musk is working frantically to reanimate Milk as I type.

by Anonymousreply 43Last Sunday at 11:47 AM

I'm coming back from the dead to be Attorney General. I'll also be launching an "AIDS isn't that bad, it affects virtually nobody!" campaign

by Anonymousreply 44Last Sunday at 1:19 PM
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