Serving up this steaming pile of
Celebrity Gossip
Gay Politics
Gay News
and Pointless Bitchery
Since 1995

Hello and thank you for being a DL contributor. We are changing the login scheme for contributors for simpler login and to better support using multiple devices. Please click here to update your account with a username and password.

Hello. Some features on this site require registration. Please click here to register for free.

Hello and thank you for registering. Please complete the process by verifying your email address. If you can't find the email you can resend it here.

Hello. Some features on this site require a subscription. Please click here to get full access and no ads for $1.99 or less per month.

All About My Mother

Name a few simple things that will forever remind you of your mother. Dead or Alive. Good or Bad.


Fresca, Parliament cigarettes, Chantilly perfume, and helmet hair sprayed within an inch of its life.

by Anonymousreply 96Last Monday at 9:52 PM

Blind rage.

by Anonymousreply 110/16/2020

Estee Lauder perfume, curly dark hair, red lipstick, autumn colors that she loved to wear.

by Anonymousreply 210/16/2020

She loved my sister and barely tolerated me. My sister turned out to be an emotionally abusive bitch too.

by Anonymousreply 310/16/2020

Paging Dr. Freud. Dr. Freud to the DL stat.

by Anonymousreply 410/16/2020

Joy perfume, white gloves, her inability to cook which she freely admitted (I learned how to in self-defense), her gardens, which won awards; her endurance of and subsequent report on my father's employees' annual visit, always a prelude to their drunken trip to the Music Circus to see Roy Clark or "Hee-Haw" or some country show; her red Thunderbird, and the end of her life: long, slow, and painful.

Nobody gets it all, but she got a lot and used it well.

by Anonymousreply 510/16/2020

Joy perfume, white gloves, her inability to cook which she freely admitted (I learned how to in self-defense), her gardens, which won awards; her endurance of and subsequent report on my father's employees' annual visit, always a prelude to their drunken trip to the Music Circus to see Roy Clark or "Hee-Haw" or some country show; her red Thunderbird, and the end of her life: long, slow, and painful.

Nobody gets it all, but she got a lot and used it well.

by Anonymousreply 610/16/2020

Narcissism. Self-involvement. Vodka martinis.

by Anonymousreply 710/16/2020

My mother was out for a drive in the country and came across a tiny train station (platform, waiting room, ticket office, package room) from the early 1900s, and was so incensed that they were going to tear it down that she bought it and had it moved to the back of our property. She always did her best work when my father was out of town, so he had another surprise when he came home a couple weeks later. She's about to turn 100 next month, and still full of piss and vinegar.

by Anonymousreply 810/16/2020

Reese's Peanut Butter Eggs (she loved them).

I loved her so much, and so much reminds me of her. But those are kind of her symbol for us kids.

by Anonymousreply 910/16/2020

Unfortunate resemblance to Nancy Reagan.

World's worst shrink.

by Anonymousreply 1010/16/2020

R8 Your mum sounds awesome. Mad respect for her saving that train station. If she ever sells it sounds like a lot of fun for some young children to play in.

by Anonymousreply 1110/16/2020

She always hated perfume until she got older. Then, it was White Linen. I still have some of her scarves and gloves that smell of White Linen. She smoked Pall Malls, replaced them with some generic brand, and finally stopped. She had blue eyes and freckles, and scandalized the neighbors by mowing the lawn, keeping her hair cut short, wearing shorts, playing cards....... I think they envied her her self-possession and immunity to gossip. She made sure my brother and I knew how to sew a button back on, cook scrambled eggs, and do the laundry. She had no use for helpless men who depended on woman to look after them. She loved animals of every kind, and they always loved her in return. I miss her every day.

by Anonymousreply 1210/16/2020

Christmas. Sewing. Baking. Roast turkey. Short temper. Sweat peas. Perennials. The Queen's hair.

by Anonymousreply 1310/16/2020


Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 1410/16/2020

Cats-eye glasses. Modeling clay and artists' materials; paints, turpentine, etc.. Siamese cats. Love of infants and small children; dislike of (or, more charitably, an inability to comprehend) teenagers. Ship models, particularly of pirate ships. Bizarre Victorian furniture. Junk shops. Liver and bacon and onions. Foil-wrapped baked potatoes out of a Franklin stove. Pet raccoons. black-and-white movies. Home repairs that had a decidedly eccentric bent. Complete inability to manage a garden or, indeed, care about such things. Halloween as an all-day holiday. Costumes for every holiday.

by Anonymousreply 1510/16/2020

Barefeet in the snow. Her mailbox is a good 30 steps from the front door and nothing stops her from walking out there barefoot.

Dr. Quinn: Medicine Woman

by Anonymousreply 1610/16/2020

A Rosary - everywhere and always.

by Anonymousreply 1710/16/2020

Myself every time I look in the mirror.

by Anonymousreply 1810/16/2020

I miss my mom.

by Anonymousreply 1910/16/2020

It's so weird that R5 and R6 had such similar mothers!

by Anonymousreply 2010/16/2020

Pall Mall cigarettes, Johnny Mathis, fur coats.

by Anonymousreply 2110/16/2020

Vanity Fair magazine, procedurals and hour long dramas on tv, books , niki st phalle perfume, beef stroganoff

by Anonymousreply 2210/16/2020

Marlboro lights. Vicodin. Xanax. Percocet. Manic rages.

by Anonymousreply 2310/16/2020

R11Yeah, she's crazy...ha. That train station was installed on a concrete block foundation, and she used it as a tea house and a get- away when she just wanted to listen to music or was shabby chic before anyone knew what it meant. When my dad died, we sold the house, and it stayed with the property. Lots of fun memories, though.

by Anonymousreply 2410/16/2020

OP = Mike Pence

by Anonymousreply 2510/16/2020

for those that loved their mom and those that miss her, you will never now how lucky you were because you will never know what is like to be on the other side of it. be thankful. I often wonder what it would have been liked to have been cared about by my mother. And I daydream as to what it would be like to miss her. Oh well I guess we couldn't all of had a great mom. it took me a long time but I'm okay with it now.

by Anonymousreply 2610/16/2020

Clutter verging on hoarding, anger management issues, a phone growing out of her ear when she wasn’t sleeping, and the inability to say a kind thing to her children.

by Anonymousreply 2710/16/2020

Mah Jong. Fierce belief in her three sons. Salt of the earth. Lived life with gratitude. So loving. Miss her all the time.

by Anonymousreply 2810/16/2020

Benson & Hedges

The Moody Blues


And too many others to list...

by Anonymousreply 2910/16/2020

Virginia Slims Superslim Menthol Light 100s. Smoked them for years. I still remember the exact kind because I'd get sent to buy a pack from the convenience store sometimes.

She drank Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi for years.

Would lay on the couch next to the stereo, plug the headphones in, & listen to Gloria Estefan, Kenny G, Michael Bolton, Meatloaf.

by Anonymousreply 3010/16/2020

Morbidly obsese. Unfiltered Camels. CC & ginger highballs. Vindictive drunkard. Dead.

by Anonymousreply 3110/16/2020

Eating peanut butter from a jar. Creative leftover casseroles held together from pasta or bisquick. Piano and organ. Always running late to work / picking us up. Spend way too much time in church. Trusted it too much. Gave up her identity for men.

by Anonymousreply 3210/16/2020

r1 mine too. I grew u scared shitless of her. Mean, mean spirited, a thief a manipulator, a total nut job who made our lives a horror .

Im glad she died so I never have to speak to her again

by Anonymousreply 3310/16/2020

Today my Mom would be 99...I’m 64....still miss her everyday. Wonderful women, smart, beautiful, great cool, hard worker and great Mother me, my sister and brother. She could have done much better husband wise, but she loved him.

by Anonymousreply 3410/16/2020

We had a console stereo and my mom would clean house and listen to Dionne Warwick (Burt Bacharach era), Tom Jones, and Firestone Christmas albums ("Marshmallow World" by Johnny Mathis).

Paperback books: "Helter Skelter" and "Valley of the Dolls." I would read the books after she was done.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 3510/16/2020

Kindness and warmth to everyone, always saw the best in others, very pretty, practical, smart, a GREAT cook, loved her children and encouraged and respected our differences. My father said it best when he said, "your Mother was born to be a mother, she wanted nothing more in life than to have children and care for them". She was really was a unique human being and I miss her every day.

by Anonymousreply 3610/16/2020

cigarettes: Lucky Strike

beverage: swill (1/2 coffee, 1/4 evaporated milk, 1/4 sugar)

food: hated to cook until she found St. Julia the year I went to college

music: played classical piano; listened to muzak or Neil Diamond

TV: anything medical (Ben Casey, Dr. Kildare, M*A*S*H)

great with animals: we never had issues with our dogs and cats; we always had one of each

biggest obsession: her Catholic faith

second biggest obsession: me

third biggest obsession: pills (downs, late in life)

by Anonymousreply 3710/16/2020


by Anonymousreply 3810/16/2020

Madder than a hatter.

by Anonymousreply 3910/16/2020

Black double ended dildo, wore boots in the summer, never paid her credit card bills, flipped off the town mayor with her kids in the car.

by Anonymousreply 4010/16/2020

Good golfer. Great cook. Always kind. Very beautiful. Affectionate, funny. Passed away 4 years ago. I miss her everyday

by Anonymousreply 4110/16/2020

Damn, I thought it was a thread about the great Pedro Almodóvar movie.

by Anonymousreply 4210/16/2020

Otto Lowy, roast beef dinners, Kitsilano, French cuisine, apple pie, our cat socking it to her with two paws when she sang high notes.

by Anonymousreply 4310/16/2020

Mine is like the trying to be hip mom in “Mean Girls”. She’s not truly motherly enough to have these great memories or with a particularly strong personality, either. She’s like an old teenager who looks like Nancy Reagan and dresses like a thirty year old yoga mom. She goes along with the opinions of whatever man she’s with, with is hardcore conservative. So: white wine, Trader Joe’s, Botox, church choir and beauty products.

by Anonymousreply 4410/16/2020

Malignant narcissism, slamming doors, silent treatment, chain smoking, rum and coke, Je Reviens parfum, sitting in the dark playing guitar and singing self pitying songs, cups half full of cold coffee all over the house, vicious gossiping on the phone, casual meanness and thoughtless cruelty.

by Anonymousreply 4510/16/2020

I love a smokey woman, but I'm so glad my mother doesn't smoke. But she's always had a gas range. Nowadays, that's apparently worse.

by Anonymousreply 4610/16/2020

Blue Willow, New Yorker cartoons, and dried yellow rose petals.

by Anonymousreply 4710/16/2020

Joy perfume, white gloves, her inability to cook which she freely admitted (I learned how to in self-defense), her gardens, which won awards; her endurance of and subsequent report on my father's employees' annual visit, always a prelude to their drunken trip to the Music Circus to see Roy Clark or "Hee-Haw" or some country show; her red Thunderbird, and the end of her life: long, slow, and painful.

Nobody gets it all, but she got a lot and used it well.

by Anonymousreply 4810/16/2020

Broken, personality disorder with narcissism. She’s like a little girl, I have to play grown-up while she’s the child; I’ve resented it my entire life. Never shared a joyful moment with me, every major rite of passage in my life was met with screaming, anxiety, drama, conflict.

I’ve made peace with it as much as I can, tried to move on. But getting older and having gone through a lot of of setbacks, I’ve become more like her, and I hate it. I think I was in denial about the damage to me. It haunts me.

As others have said, it’s kind of luck of the draw. I’m truly happy that most of the posts here are so warm, loving, affectionate, and full of love. You deserve that! Always treasure it, and make it your goal to love others in the same way your mother loved you.

The beauty of life is that even though it has kicked my ass, it takes all kinds to make world go ‘round. I know my struggles are also a gift too and make me stronger than many people.

by Anonymousreply 4910/16/2020

Petty. Narcissistic. Selfish. Insecure. Alcoholic. Passive aggressive. Chronic smoker. And child abuser. The caftans and turbans made her seem like an Auntie Mame type, but she had none of the warmth, wit or charm.

by Anonymousreply 5010/16/2020

Always shit a boatload

by Anonymousreply 5110/16/2020

She once laughed so hard at a joke she made that her easy chair fell over backward and her stocking feet waved in the air as she continued chortling.

by Anonymousreply 5210/16/2020

My mom would laugh so hard at my dad’s dirty jokes that her godamned ol teeth fell out of her mouth!

by Anonymousreply 5310/16/2020

Children should be seen and not heard.

by Anonymousreply 5410/16/2020

Alcoholic rage-aholic vindictive. Had plenty of money to throw bashes for her freeloading friends to get compliments and attention with liquor and food but begrudged me $$ for education, clothes, any activity I wanted to do was squelched. Ignored me my whole childhood, I left home the day I turned 18 and never looked back.

by Anonymousreply 5510/16/2020

My mom only ever apologized to me one time. She looked at me eating a bag of potato chips and said: "I taught you how to eat like that. I'm sorry."

by Anonymousreply 5610/16/2020

Kents then Benson & Hedges. 2 pots of coffee a day. Charity work. Would only drive sporty cars with a stick shift . Getting dragged along on her shopping expeditions to Saks at Old Orchard or Bonwit Teller downtown (Chicago). car radio always turned to the station that played the most Bacharach. WAIT AM 820.

by Anonymousreply 5710/16/2020

What annoys you today? My posture? Hands? Voice?

by Anonymousreply 5810/16/2020

Things that remind me of my mother:

Cinnabar perfume

The smell of coffee; she drank it all day, weak and black, no sugar

Spätzle-type chicken dumplings, which I now make and my siblings gush about how they are just like Mom made

Skin so Soft smell. She added it to her bath water and smelling it jolts me right back.

Mom is extremely judgmental and thinks that she is always right. She remembers every slight against her from her whole life, no matter how small, and she holds grudges lasting decades. Nonetheless, she was a good mom when I was young. Unfortunately, she has been miserable for the last fifty years. Before the pandemic, I visited at least one week a year and flew her out here 2-3 times a year.

by Anonymousreply 5910/16/2020

FUN FUN FUN, party party party......both my brother and sister woke her up late to talk when they lost their virginity. I couldn't because my abusive alcohol father was still around.

Not a compassionate hands on mother. I could have used that BADLY when I was a kid. She was not on my side when I was a bullied kid, maybe because she was a mean girl herself....otherwise, non judgmental, no problem learning I was gay.

by Anonymousreply 6010/16/2020

R56 she was a bitch!

by Anonymousreply 6110/16/2020

Abusive both physically and emotionally. When she died, I no longer had the burden of that relationship.

by Anonymousreply 6210/16/2020

Leotard tops, poetry written out in longhand, manic depressive mood swings. Small dogs. Magenta colored geraniums.

by Anonymousreply 6310/16/2020

Never made left hand turns.

by Anonymousreply 6410/16/2020

[quote] Never made left hand turns.

lol, probably for the better. Maybe she knew her driving limitations.

by Anonymousreply 6510/16/2020

Vodka. Self-loathing. Henna hair dye. Betty White.

by Anonymousreply 6610/16/2020

Young: Always stylish, pretty and slim, often angry. Middle age: Matronly figure but well dressed, still angry sometimes. Old age: Back to slim, handsome and striking with her short, stylish white hair. Finally happy and mostly at peace.

Negative: Insecure, petty, paranoid, yelled a lot, overly concerned about image and what other's thought. While in our teens and early 20s she loudly objected when we deviated from her ideals but was genuinely proud of who we became.

Positive: Loved poetry, especially reading and quoting Emily Dickenson, loved art, culture, a fine restaurant and a good cocktail. Obsessed with her kids getting college educations, impressed with smart, educated, and articulate people, open to other cultures and food. Adored my father. My siblings and I all got college degrees, we were afraid not to.

Quirks: Obsessively told stories of her sad childhood to us when we were small. Father died when she was a toddler, mother worked nights to support her small children, mean Christian grandmother who helped raise them, mean older brother, poverty, pet rooster for dinner one Sunday night, gossipy small town. They were not happy stories and they are seared on my soul.

by Anonymousreply 6710/16/2020

Anxiety & depression

by Anonymousreply 6810/16/2020

Laughter... perfect telephone voice (she once did an ad for AT&T)... peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and Campbells soup when I'm sick... good advice...

She could be as fierce as a drag queen when called on to protect, but stretched and stood on tiptoe to pass five feet.

by Anonymousreply 6910/16/2020

I... I got my dreamsh from my father and my, I got my dremsh frosh mama.

by Anonymousreply 7010/16/2020

botox and treadmills

by Anonymousreply 7110/16/2020

Suspicion. No one is on your side; everyone will turn against you at any second. Everyone is looking to cheat you or con you or pick your pocket.

Are you sure you need that? You probably shouldn’t spend money on that; you don’t deserve it, or it will break, or it’s not that nice and you paid too much for it.

Toughness. Your problems aren’t that bad and you can get through it without anybodies help.

by Anonymousreply 7210/16/2020

Emeraude perfume, dog and cat lover, adventurer, positive outlook, PBS, very stylish, camper, wonderful seamstress, great gift wrapper, great bed maker with the crispest sheets, ski patrol, couldn’t catch a ball, Harvest Moon, curious, kind, loving, enjoyed life to its fullest. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

by Anonymousreply 7310/16/2020

My father's fourth and fifth wife.

by Anonymousreply 7410/16/2020

relentless viciousness. she had a nuclear reactor where her heart should have been. did i mention relentless?

by Anonymousreply 7510/17/2020

A bingo dauber.

by Anonymousreply 7610/17/2020

A great heart despite the many challenges of too many kids and not enough money, sitting with my father sharing a beer, cigarettes, swing and big band music, hating Republicans, tacitly accepting the one boy who was different from his six brothers (it was the 70s), and a death that came decades too soon.

by Anonymousreply 7710/17/2020

Famous. Glam.

by Anonymousreply 7810/17/2020

Mother - what's the expression? - isn't quite herself today.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 7910/17/2020

A treadle sewing machine. Nice stews. Getting annoyed with right wing politicians. Loving my dad.

by Anonymousreply 8010/17/2020

I have to say that I love this thread — equally sorry for the unfortunate memories as I am happy for those with loving stories. Even the cynical ones (looking at you, R1) have value.

by Anonymousreply 8110/17/2020

R36 What a gift.

by Anonymousreply 8210/17/2020

r49 and all the others with horrible narcissistic mothers. I too never fully got over the damage she caused me. I was an extremely sensitive child with no one to protect me from the momster.

As I posted in the Tatum O thread, one never completely gets over bad parenting.

Just know that none of us who had the same women we unfortunately had to call our mothers are alone

by Anonymousreply 8310/17/2020

Despite all the issues I experienced and suffered throughout my 1960s-70s childhood, I am gleefully happy that neither parent was religious. My family was extremely mixed - Catholic, Jewish, Episcopal - all semi-practicing if at all. When I told my mother when I was TEN that I wanted out, she said okay, and I haven't been to a church since except for a few weddings.

by Anonymousreply 8410/17/2020

Kent 100s, Maxwell House instant, historical romances, All My Children.

Never left the house without her hair and makeup perfectly done. Always wore timeless fashion, but she never spent a lot on clothes. Ironed everything and would never let us out of the house wearing wrinkled clothes.

Great cook. I miss her pot roast, spaghetti, vegetable soup, and chocolate pie.

She liked to come cross as prim and proper, but with me she could get a little bawdy. She gave me my sense of humor and also my outlook of treating everyone equally. She hated racism with a passion, and had black friends when that was very rare in our little southern town.

LOVED Bill Clinton and ORDERED me to vote for him. (He was the first President I was able to vote for.)

She knew I was gay, but never said anything until I did. I wish she'd said something to me sooner, but she was great when I came out at 25. She was ferociously loyal and protective of her family and friends. She was not perfect, and there were a few things that probably fucked us up to a degree, but I think she was a great person and a great mom. Friends and other people who knew her still talk about her to me. She made impressions on many people.

She died when I was 28 and I miss her terribly. I have felt rudderless many times in my life since she died. My father just died a couple of years ago, and even though he was pretty great too, I was never close to him like I was with my mother.

by Anonymousreply 8510/17/2020

Thank you all. Especially to those that persevered.

by Anonymousreply 8610/17/2020

Obsessively Catholic, terrified little girl who still fears death - and being left alone - at 87. Damaged - but she tried.

by Anonymousreply 8710/17/2020

Mine was a lapsed Catholic. Like OP she smoked Parliament cigarettes. Her perfume was Wind Song by Prince Matchabelli. She had a wry sense of humor and devotion friends and family, but she also had no trouble setting limits. Her time to herself was reading (everything literature to trash) in cold weather and gardening when it was warm. Her older sister was a self-involved harpy who carried on with a married man for many years (and managed to marry him when his invalid wife died)---on warm summer nights, my mother would take walks and sit on the front porch of her friend down the street and talk. She was close to the neighbor but it also meant not having to take calls from her sister.

by Anonymousreply 8810/17/2020

Charlie and Rive Gauche perfumes, read stories to us before bed every single night when we were kids, took good care of us (doctor/dentist appointments, bathed, powdered, jammies with feet, hair etc), drew on her eyebrows because they were sparse and light, kept her hair short, watched The Young and the Restless with her when I'd come home for lunch in elementary school. Always got me whatever I wanted/ needed, even if it was 10pm and I forgot to tell her I needed a protractor for my math assignment - she went out, found a place open and got it for me. Was always there to pick me up wherever I was, never had to wait after school or at the mall like other kids. Bad cook (her chicken cacciatore was raw chicken parts dumped in a pot, a huge jar of store bought marinara sauce poured over it, and boiled), but had dinner on the table every single night ( hey, she tried).

Loved my father fiercely as he loved her, and the hardest thing I ever saw was her sitting alone at the breakfast table the day after he died, eating alone.

Now the bad stuff. Called me mean names a lot, favored my sister over me, never stuck up for me when I was bullied at school. But, all in all she's okay (still here).

by Anonymousreply 8910/17/2020

Arpege perfume , Balboa Island, Aida Grey salon/cosmetics, designer Power Suits, perfect accessories, 1968 Mercedes Benz, travel enthusiast, chili & gin turkey-stuffing (not together, obviously!). And Jamming out to "Upside Down", just to embarrass me.

I really miss her.

by Anonymousreply 90Last Sunday at 7:16 PM

"One may choose to live as a civilized human being or as an aborigine."

by Anonymousreply 91Last Sunday at 7:22 PM

On stage or on pills.

by Anonymousreply 92Last Sunday at 9:19 PM

It's all a big nothing! What makes you so special?

by Anonymousreply 93Last Monday at 1:41 PM

You're looking at me, R81, but, you don't see me.

Yet, you still have value.

by Anonymousreply 94Last Monday at 3:50 PM

Have you ever heard of an individual called Motherfuckeress?

by Anonymousreply 95Last Monday at 4:14 PM

^ Yeah.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 96Last Monday at 9:52 PM
Need more help? Click Here.

Yes indeed, we too use "cookies." Don't you just LOVE clicking on these things on every single site you visit? I know we do! You can thank the EU parliament for making everyone in the world click on these pointless things while changing absolutely nothing. If you are interested you can take a look at our privacy/terms or if you just want to see the damn site without all this bureaucratic nonsense, click ACCEPT and we'll set a dreaded cookie to make it go away. Otherwise, you'll just have to find some other site for your pointless bitchery needs.


Become a contributor - post when you want with no ads!