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What to do about family members who are voting for Trump?

My 70yo mother will be voting for Trump in November, same as she did in 2016. I have tried to get her to recognize the various atrocities he has committed throughout his term but it mostly falls on deaf ears. She is not a vocal Trump supporter - she doesn't spout Fox News soundbites or wear a maga hat. She's just a lifelong Republican who doesn't ever vote blue.

I keep hearing that this election is for "America's soul" and while I hate Trump more than anyone or thing I've ever hated and think that a rabid incontinent dog would be a better leader, I'm also having a disconnect when it comes to my mother. Is anyone else experiencing this? Is the best answer just to shut up and ignore it?

And for the record, I already ignore her Catholicism, racism and mild homophobia (it has improved in the 20ish years I have been out).

by Anonymousreply 35Last Wednesday at 11:38 AM

I’m really lucky that I have none in my immediate family, white boomers and millennials. Maybe one who doesn’t vote who I’ve written off. I would definitely alienate them if I had any trumpers— it’s beyond detestable at this point.

by Anonymousreply 1Last Tuesday at 11:45 AM

Why isn't "kill them" a choice?

by Anonymousreply 2Last Tuesday at 11:59 AM

Cut them out of your lives to teach them loss and empathy.

by Anonymousreply 3Last Tuesday at 12:03 PM

Where does your mother live? I have serious issues with my parents both voting for Trump (solely for tax/business reasons) but since they live in NJ and their presidential votes don't matter since the state is so Democratic, we can just avoid talking politics. But I live in PA and have had fights with other family members that live here over Trump, since those votes are actually going to matter.

by Anonymousreply 4Last Tuesday at 12:05 PM

Trumpists are like people who have been duped by a con man.

Admitting they've been duped is hard so they often double down--think of all the stories of otherwise savvy people who give money to Nigerian princes.

Con men like Trump use that to their advantage.

Just view it as a mental disorder and try and help them come to terms with how they let themselves be mislead--this will be key once he loses.

by Anonymousreply 5Last Tuesday at 12:08 PM

How do I deal with younger members of my family voting for Trump?

by Anonymousreply 6Last Tuesday at 12:11 PM

Beat her.

by Anonymousreply 7Last Tuesday at 12:11 PM

I guess just don’t talk to her about politics? Trump voters are delusional and aren’t going to listen to anyone anyway. I mean what the hell kind of person you go to the guy who tells him to drink bleach?

by Anonymousreply 8Last Tuesday at 12:16 PM

If they're over 80 I suggest mercy killing.

by Anonymousreply 9Last Tuesday at 12:16 PM

[quote]How do I deal with younger members of my family voting for Trump?

Tell them they're out of your will.

by Anonymousreply 10Last Tuesday at 12:17 PM


Assume they are dangerous psychopaths or at the very least sociopaths.

They don't like you, either.

If they come over for a visit make sure they are unarmed and always stand with your back against the knife drawer.

Mention you're so happy your temperature is down to 102, discreetly put a smear of ketchup under your nose, start coughing and they should wander off hopefully never to return.

by Anonymousreply 11Last Tuesday at 12:19 PM

Try talking them out of it. I had a VERY acrimonious email conversation with my sister in law that was so flaming I thought she hated me, then after I kept reiterating my points, she broke down, apologized and confessed she was afraid her money in stocks would fall, but she hated Trump.

So, I told her, if you want to live like a Republican, vote Democrat. I hope common sense prevails.

by Anonymousreply 12Last Tuesday at 12:22 PM

[quote] She is not a vocal Trump supporter - she doesn't spout Fox News soundbites or wear a maga hat. She's just a lifelong Republican who doesn't ever vote blue.

Tell her that Donald Trump is actually a Democrat, and that he voted for Bill Clinton twice, Al Gore, and John Kerry.

Then tell her that he and his family donated to Kamala Harris' Senate campaign, and show her the receipts.

Taunt her by saying that "Oh well, at least you're still voting for a Democrat, so either way we win."

At the very least, it'll make her feel very stupid.

by Anonymousreply 13Last Tuesday at 12:32 PM

Will you never learn?

Beware of anti-American trolls bearing polls. Why are you so eager to provide them with information which they can distort into propaganda to be used against you?

Biden/Harris 2020 - We Have Their Back

by Anonymousreply 14Last Tuesday at 12:33 PM

Let it go, OP. These people have been brainwashed and only a long, systemic De-programming is how we're going to get back the 1/3 of the country that believes in Trump. Besides that, arguing till you're blue in the face, will not make her change her mind and will only raise your blood pressure. Talk about low-stress topics like the weather, any grandkids she has and what she likes on tv. If REALLY necessary, don't talk/ visit with her till the election is over, or better yet till Biden ( please Lord) is sworn in. If she inquires about your absence in her life, tell her straight up, "I think you and other Trump supporters are bat-shit crazy and are responsible for bringing about the crappy state of affairs in our Country today. I'm too angry/ upset to talk to you now. C'est finit.

by Anonymousreply 15Last Tuesday at 12:33 PM

My mother’s dead. She was a rabid conservative. She would’ve voted for Trump because abortion. I used to speak to her on the phone but I would never go visit her at her house where her tv spewed Fox News all night & the Catholic rosary channel all day with that crazy ass old nun.

Now that she’s dead I don’t see any of her family who don’t like me because I married a Jew, put myself through college & am an atheist. They’re happy as pigs in shit saying their rosaries & watching Fox News. They all did things that are sins according to the church when they were younger - married Protestants, didn’t go to church on Sunday or take their kids to church, lied, cheated, stole. But now they’re super duper Catholics. All of my cousins, who never set foot in a church, still don’t go to church. They’re all posting military hagiography on their Facebook pages. Only 1 of my 40 cousins was in the military & he joined because police were looking for him.

They're all racist, sexist, homophobic. They hate me.

by Anonymousreply 16Last Tuesday at 12:34 PM

R14 believes in Qanon. No one can gather information from an anonymous message board.

by Anonymousreply 17Last Tuesday at 12:38 PM

I just can't see how any parent of a gay child could vote for Trump. Nope.

by Anonymousreply 18Last Tuesday at 12:38 PM

Oh btw - not going to church in the Catholic religion = a mortal sin, i.e., you’re going straight to hell. There was no choice as to whether or not to attend mass every week. It was a requirement. So if you’re a real catholic, your ass needs to be in a pew on Saturday or Sunday.

by Anonymousreply 19Last Tuesday at 12:41 PM

Euthanasia: the new gift card.

by Anonymousreply 20Last Tuesday at 1:08 PM

That old she is probably voting by absentee ballot, offer to mail it for her and then don't.

by Anonymousreply 21Last Tuesday at 4:10 PM

Luckily I have none in my family. But if I did I write them off. Just like I have done with any friends along the way who turned out to be republicans. Nothing good can come out of being affiliated with republican. Ever.

by Anonymousreply 22Last Tuesday at 4:20 PM
Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 23Last Tuesday at 4:42 PM

Most of my coworkers are for Trump but I don't think any of them will actually vote at all. They are the kind of people who only read headlines and form their opinions off that.

by Anonymousreply 24Last Tuesday at 4:52 PM

R17: Pull your empty head out of your asshole and try to put it to better use than as a MAGA/Ushanka hat rack. We understand the mechanism behind your online polls. Nice try, but no borscht.

by Anonymousreply 25Last Wednesday at 9:26 AM

[quote]What to do about family members who are voting for Trump?

All I can say is that actions speak louder than words.

by Anonymousreply 26Last Wednesday at 9:28 AM

I have two ones who have got off the deep end with conspiracy theories about Covid and BLM. I had to unfollow them on Facebook.

Along with my mother they're the last two of my aunts I have left, so I'm just going to avoid politics with them all together.

by Anonymousreply 27Last Wednesday at 9:56 AM

If you have no immediate family members who are Trumpers it is easy to say cut them off - harder to do in reality. Friends are easy to ditch, and most of your friends more than likely already agree with you politically since you became friends because of commonalities.

I have two good friends who were very republican, one I was always respectfully able to talk to about our differences; and he has left the party over Trump The other was more of a blowhard and a conversational bully so we just avoided politics; but he became a rabid Trumper even though I though he was too smart for that. I quietly stopped speaking to him two years ago, no announcement or confrontation since it wouldn’t do any good anyway, just stopped contacting him.

Family is a different story, aunts / uncles / cousins you can pull away from easily. Parents and siblings (and so have both in the Trump camp) it’s really impossible - we have never agreed politically anyway so I just now strongly enforce the “you bring up politics I’m leaving Sunday Dinner rule,” which I was admittedly lax about pre-Trump. I did leave the house that first Thanksgiving and that pretty much shut them up around me. I’m never going to get through to then, so I settle for not being actively aggravated in their presence.

by Anonymousreply 28Last Wednesday at 9:56 AM

She's racist, homophobic and a Trump supporter.

What do you want us to do about it, OP?

by Anonymousreply 29Last Wednesday at 10:11 AM

I will never stop discussing it with family, because I need them to understand that their actions are harmful, and they obviously do not TRULY love me - which is fine - but just admit it. Your racism and fake Christianity, are more important.

by Anonymousreply 30Last Wednesday at 10:14 AM

[quote]r14 believes in Qanon. No one can gather information from an anonymous message board.

I think R14 is being paranoid BUT yeah, people can obviously get info from an anonymous message board. It doesn't seem likely that they could get anything out of your weird poll, but I can also see why R14 would think this was a stealth division troll thread, too.

by Anonymousreply 31Last Wednesday at 10:20 AM

My Dad is not so much a Trumper as he is an anti dem (he's still bitching about Jimmy Carter), plus he watches Fox News all day so his remaining brain cells have marinated in crazy for years, so I don't think there is much hope. Though he's been disgusted about his state handled COVID, so...but he'll never admit he was wrong, so if he does vote dem, he'll never admit it.

Most of my relatives that are Dump supporters (and I have more than I care to admit) I know longer keep in contact with; I have one cousin who at least has the good sense to keep her mouth shut, though her husband is a rabid MAGA type

Finally, I have some people from work who are religious who are Dump followers and I feel fairly certain they buy into the whole QAnon/pedo crap. I kind of struggle with this one the most because I genuinely believed they were kind & generous people - regardless of your opinion on religion - but I've had to consider that I misread them because they're not stupid, poorly educated, confederate flag types (if you will). Moreover, they post stuff on social media about how "well Americans aren't racists, so if you see racism, you're just a negative person! (or something like that). Again, I've had to reconsider what I thought of these people as they don't seem to be willing to consider the idea that just because *you* don't see it as a problem, others might...

by Anonymousreply 32Last Wednesday at 10:32 AM

I tried the talk to the people in your family route. You are coming from a disadvantage already when they are insane to begin with.

So no amount of talking does anything. I just ended it with the parting shot of telling them if Trump wins again and they have no Medicare and SS, they can pull themselves up by their bootstraps.

by Anonymousreply 33Last Wednesday at 11:22 AM

My mom loved Nixon no matter what. No changing minds, I guess. Should I have blasted her about it?

Didn't seem worth it, but this ass is in office right now, and ruining the country.

by Anonymousreply 34Last Wednesday at 11:37 AM

There are plenty of white Christians in my extended family and I'm fortunate not to have to deal with them at all. What can you do though? I'm trying to resign myself to the fact that around 40 percent of Americans want to give living under a fascist authoritarian government a try. It really makes me angry, I don't want to live like that, so I'm glad I don't have to see these smug cousins because I'd probably attack them physically.

by Anonymousreply 35Last Wednesday at 11:38 AM
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