Commercials we HATE: Summer 2020 Lockdown Edition

There are so many to choose from. A whole separate category where the narrator speaks of “these challenging times” et al.

A most hated one that doesn’t mention Covid are the AAA ads with the perfect young family who will use the saved money to go camping, or buy sports equipment.

[quote]A most hated one that doesn’t mention Covid are the AAA ads with the erfect young family who will use the saved money to go camping, or buy sports equipment.

YES!!!! Those AAA ads are beyond annoying. Here are some of the people portrayed in them:

—"Gary and Kayla." He begins his intro by saying, "We bungled our insurance…" I know. It's supposed to be "bundled." It isn't. Listen to it. Then at the end, while discussing the money they saved, Kayla says something completely intelligible, which sounds like, "We nye go PAAAHHH, we might go out to eat…" Ad at the end, Gary gives a hysterical laugh as Kayle looks on approvingly.

—"Paula and Joaquin." Paula has a completely misshapen upper head and looks like a forceps baby. They have an obese young daughter who plays baseball. The daughter gets out of the car and quickly lumbers over to where the other players are. The wide-screen shot of her gigantic undulating behumpas is rivaled only by that of James Arness' gigantic behumpas at the beginning of [italic]Gunsmoke.[/italic] Early in the commercial, Paula opens her mouth wide, for no reason. The ad concludes with more forced laughter from Joaquin and Paula, after she says that buying more sports equipment with their AAA savings is only possible "in…[pause]HIS world."

—"Jennifer (I think) and her husband (whose name I forgot). She is black. He is white. In one scene, they're walking together and he appears bent over and assisted by canes or something. On closer look, they're at a bowling alley and he's loaded down with bowling equipment. He is not crippled. At least there's no maniacal laughter from either of them.

—"Phillip." He's a very dour-appearing bearded gentleman who apparently is incapable of smiling or registering any emotion at all. He looks like a total dick.

Yeah, you could argue that I don't get out enough. I'm in the habit of fast-forwarding through all commercials, but I tend to watch the AAA spots and focus in on the sheer awfulness of them in. As a result of the ads, I wouldn't have AAA car insurance if it were free.

This one. No commentary needed.

The Nugenix commercials with Frank Thomas, and some slutty middle aged white fraus fawning over him because they want some big black cock in their lives.

I’ve come to this thread to confess that when I first saw the newish Geico commercial with Idina Menzel I thought she was Lea Michelle. This was around the time Michelle had become toxic and I though how unfortunate that Geico has her as a spokesperson. But alas, it’s the (as far as I know) non-problematic Menzel. Although I’m still not crazy about the commercial.

Should I just pack my stuff and leave?

The Uber "no mask, no ride" commercial gets on my nerves.

that fukin fag tom selleck and his fukin retro mortgage bullshit....

he is a water theif !!!!

Those fucking BetMGM commercials.

Lily from AT&T

Any of the incessant insurance commercials, but especially the Limu Emu ones.

Richard should haul out his huge cock and show us his delicious foreskin. That's a show I'd watch!

This commercial makes me want kids to get HPV

This dumb bitch who drinks supermarket wine and needs to buy sunglasses asap so no one will realize how drunk she is at 1030 in the morning.

EVERY

FUCKING

ONE

OF

THEM

Also the bitch in the ad at R11 just walks out with the wine and sunglasses without paying. Good thing she's white and blonde or she would have been shot.

Exactly she's a drunk and a thief! Fraus think that they can get away with anything they want.

Liberty! Liberty! Liberty!

Local political ads, if only because they run literally every 5 minutes and will continue to do so through and including Nov. 2 -- the concept of wearing out one's welcome is foreign to these people.

Any commercial with an adult female jumping up and down while clapping her hands. Worst offender is 1-800-Junk!

Every commercial on Hulu—all six of them. I also cannot stand the Geico commercial with Idina. Good singer, but I do not care for her voice.

R2 has WAY too much invested in a 30 second commercial.

The Lady Gaga commercial for Valentino Voce Viva is THE stupidest thing I've ever seen.

Is Lady Fraud Fraud still pretending that she's a rebel while shilling for mass-produced fragrance by one of the biggest fashion brands in the world?

I must admit that I LIKE the Pepto jingle commercial from the Country-Western version to the Airplane steward version.

Nausea, heart burn, indigestion, ...

I sing along.

And the hearing aid commercial with the young couple and condoms makes me laugh every time.

I miss the Viberzi lady.

[quote]Richard should haul out his huge cock and show us his delicious foreskin.

Just pull on the rope around his neck and it will pop out.

The guy in OP's thread is some vile Brit who somehow has been able to squat in America without deported. He's been arrested at least twice. Once for sucking dick in the Rambles in Central Park. He apparently has/had a bad coke and meth habit. He seems like he'd be a vile, nasty old queen. Likely into having someone shit in his mouth and being pissed on.

I hate the one where the mother is chasing a kid to eat some vegetables. Then it shows the parent giving in and serving some shitty macaroni and cheese. We ate what our parents put in front of us! Period.

Yes, get off my lawn!

Richard Quest is awesome, so kindly fuck off OP!

I’m not sure if I love or hate this PureWick (a bedside shop vac for urine) commercial.

Having grown accustomed to all bodily fluids being represented by blue I hate that their animation actually goes there and uses yellow.

Oh the other hand, I love pissy old mom’s mid-Atlantic accent when she says “better, thank you” and the daughter responds with “OhI’mSoGladOhGood” spoken as one word.

The testimonial by Amazon's deliriously happy female employee whose 3 year-old greets deliveries at home with "Mommy's wook!".

Childish voices always make me cringe -- and shouldn't he be able to pronounce the letter R by now?

My dad had this mancrush on Richard Quest. Him and Rob Lowe.

Condors, why would I be asking you about CONDORS!

I LOVE this commercial.

There's an ad for an online casino and John Goodman is playing a THUMB. His head is CGI-ed onto a cartoon hand as the tip of a thumb, and we watch the hand play various online games. His head talks about how much fun it's having/how much money he's winning. Creepy!

There was some talk about the TV shyster lawyer group Cellino & Barnes and how their ads differ depending on what part of the country you live in. Anyway, I just saw their latest ad today and it made me sad... it's now advertised as "Cellino Law". The sad part is because the partner with the last name Barnes was killed in a plane crash about a month ago. It's like "Barnes who?".

The spurdle commercial

The Allstate commercial where the woman falls out of bed and rolls up in all kinds of shit and down the hill.

I want her to end up having rolled onto railroad tracks.

And...

Kinda off track, does anyone have a link to the Data Lounge Commercial that Andy Fuck Face Cohen put together after being burnt HERE?

Was it on Vimeo?

Commercials with all those heavy/fat women standing around naked, posing in their bras and panties for Playtex, or posing in their panties for designer adult diapers. We're never allowed to see commercials for so exposed, but we get no end to seeing depictions of tampoons and pee-pee panties and bras and such. It's like, GREAT! You're "full figured"! (eye roll), and you're wearing shit a company makes for you. Do we HAVE to see so much of it? And many of those same companies make items for men so can we see some "positive body images" of men wearing sensible underwear, jockstraps, condoms and pee-pee panties?!?

R31, do you mean "spurtle", the wooden kitchen utensil? Looks useful to me.

Kinda creeped out by the new Capital One card ad with Samuel L. Jackson and John Travolta dressed as Santa Clause. John is creepy looking with the white wig and beard and when I see him I just think about all of the tragedy he's had and why is he doing this?

I know, it's Claus, not CLAUSE. Typo!

I have a spurtle for oatmeal but it looks nothing like those.

Richard Quest is the best thing on CNN, OP. That's all.

The worst thing about airplane crashes is not the tragic loss of innocent lives, it's that CNN inevitably has Richard Quest on air 24/7 afterwards for weeks.

Liberty, Liberty LIBERTY! LIBERTY!

CNN also dragged him out to be the Voice of COVID for a short time, but it seems he has retreated back into the bushes of Ramble. For now.

I will take Richard Quest any day over Van Jones or Anderson Cooper. At least he has some personality and seems not to take himself too seriously.

[quote] which ends with the odious Richard Quest saying, "I'm ex-HAUSS-tid befoah we've even STAHTED!".

I know just how he feels.

I thought he was saying “We’ve lost it before we even started!”

Kars4Kids

If you stream CNN now you get Melissa McCarthy shouting “People aren’t worth saving!” multiple times in one commercial break.

"We all need a hug in the morning..." Huggies diaper commercial. The woman singing has the most cloying irritating voice. If I don't hit mute my brain feels like it will explode.

Noticing that every other commercial seems to be accompanied by some song about "this is how we do it" or "we can do it" or "like we do it." What is it with US DOING IT?

This one is the worst

Oh-oh-AY-oh!

Monday Dec 7 was the Medicare deadline, so thankfully most of those medicare commercials are gone for another year.

This one. It runs constantly in Canada. I hate it and everything about it. First, the woman's voice is annoying as fuck. I can't stand that idiotic cunt. "The cattle and the ecosystem co-exist and they actually NEED each other." Stupidest line in a commercial ever for many reasons.

Did you know that Liberty customizes your car insurance, so you only pay for what you need?

YES, R51. Sung by a group, with lots of echo.

OH-oh OH-oh OH-oh!

Also the same four-chord progression in SO many commercials. I have to look it up but I think it's like C -F -C- G.

The vagina vacuum for women who leak at night. They never show the tub with anything collected. And the wash scent commercial where the fat old blonde pelvic bumps her washing machine that has been replaced with the old fat woman who pelvic bumps the cobwebs from her cooch because of the washing scent. Should be a Roomba commercial. And then there are the vaginal leaking commercials with the squatting athlete, want to gag, and now the menstrual spurt commercial where women feel the leakage and then feel the absorbency of their twat protectors.

I hate commercials based on vaginal drippings. I DO love the Tampax commercial with the fat blonde who asks WHAT IS YOUR FLOW and hits a cunt-o-meter to recommend an appropriate pad. She's funny but will never work again. {sarc}

What's the deal with all the ads for "tactical" shit (Tac Glasses, Tac Gloves, the Tac Visor, the Tac Wallet and now the Tac Shaver)? It seems to be targeted at MAGA douchebags who want to pretend they're tough military guys. All this "military-grade" tactical shit is made by Bell & Howell, a company known for making filmstrip projectors.

The car commercial with the newlyweds having twins and the singer who - did I not know he can’t sing - I would swear it’s Jerry Seinfeld

The commercials for Mayim Bialik's new show that is coming to Fox... ugh. I don't hate her but her forced cheerfulness, retro dress and not funny interaction with Leslie Jordan annoy me. Their demeanor onscreen gives off desperation vibes, like "We are gonna be so funny together! See us, loud big woman and tiny gay man!" I've never watched more than 5 minutes of The Big Bang Theory, so MB may be the most amazing comic actress since Rosalind Russell, but those ads make me hit MUTE.

R58, the singer is Pete Seeger.

That Voltarin commercial that has the wife with the gay dancing husband who turns on the older bartender.

Oh baybee.

You know they have adult children.

Today is Xmas in America, which will be over in approx 6 hours. After which, we had better not see any more of that pussy-whipped husband who buys 2 new vehicles for the couple, only to have the domineering wife grab the one he intended for himself while he grins like a fool. I despise them both and every year I yearn for their joint demise, only to have them reappear by Thanksgiving.

[quote][R58], the singer is Pete Seeger.

I recognized Pete's voice immediately. It's amazing how many young Americans are clueless about folk music and much of any music which was produced way before they were born. Peter died in 2014 at 91. He was an American icon! He was up there with Woody Guthrie.

Seeger and Guthrie were both followed around by J. Edgar Hoover's FBI for years as Commies, until they got distracted by Joan Baez. Gotta watch those musicians!

Seeger and Guthrie were both followed around by J. Edgar Hoover's FBI for years as Commies, until they got distracted by Joan Baez. Gotta watch those musicians!

[quote]Seeger and Guthrie were both followed around by J. Edgar Hoover's FBI for years as Commies, until they got distracted by Joan Baez. Gotta watch those musicians!

Yes, Boris, I was quite aware of that. Why are you always double posting? Both of these men would have been considered Socialists, because they were. Big fucking deal.

WTF do their political leanings have to do with young people not having a fucking clue about older music and musicians? How far back does their musical knowledge go, the 90s, the 80s?!

R66, you seem to be mistaken as to who I am. Who are you? And what are you so angry about?

Just saw a horrible commercial. It was for Wild Cherry Pepsi and a woman in a convenience store opens a can of Pepsi and starts singing. But she has this awful scream/singing voice that is very ear splitting. It’s the worst commercial I’ve seen in a while.

At least now I know to mute the tv as soon as it comes on so my ears won’t bleed.

Target has an ad for a shampoo called Rhyme & Reason, which is shot like a fashion spread. Models with great hair are shown in a field in flowery dresses, and they flash the shampoo container 1-2 times. The ad ends with two of the female models leaning towards each other like they're about to kiss, for no good reason.

Any ad with spokesperson Ice-T. He's on my screen right now plugging something called Car Shield. He has no charisma and I don't get his appeal.

The combination of that cow Oprah Winfrey screeching "SUPER SOUL!" and that greasy-haired neanderthal Chip Gaines declaring "I owe you my life!" is fucking UNBEARABLE!!!! And it's played nonstop!

Sidenote: I couldn't find that horrible promo commercial for the Discovery App but I found a clip of that stupid interview.

The Sargento Cheese guy with the worlds worst wig

Angel Soft toilet paper has a new ad, with a 5-6 year old girl sitting on the toilet and her mother asking if she's done. The mother asks several times "you done? "everything out?", you know, because little kids are still new on using a toilet/knowing how to understand what's going on in their bodies. Finally, the cute girl says "all done!" and the mom hands her a wad of paper. Seconds later, the kid says "gotta go again!".

The set up for this ad is kinda cute, but I don't want to think about a child with diarrhea.

Here is the WORST.

The ads for the Spurtle, which is nothing but some glorified wooden spoons. The commercials are no better than those "As Seen on TV" ads where they make the consumer look like a clumsy oaf who can't even drain spaghetti without spilling water everywhere if they don't have the overpriced product that will make life so much easier. This Spurtle is talked up like it can perform miracles in the kitchen and your meal preparation will be so much easier.

I roll my eyes so much during these ads as I repeat out loud "It's a spoon, a spoon, a spoon!".

Local NYC Covid prevention TV commercial with "Pastor Chris" talking about getting vaccinated and why everyone needs to do it. Good message but Pastor Chris looks like a homeless crack addict, and his accent makes the 30 second ad seem endless.

The Zillow ad where the lady is so impressed with herself and keeps cheering "Me! Me! Me! Me!"

1-800-LAWYERS has ads that have "clients" telling how they received 6-figure settlements for a sidewalk trip and fall and millions for car accident cases. They seem aimed to urban people and the ads spin the narrative "all you have to do is hire us for your little fender-bender and you WILL GET PAID!".

Seems shady because these types of business usually are.

T-Mobile “costume party “ commercial. I’ve seen it far too many times.

I hate the “plain folks” grilled cheese commercials., and the one where the little girl keeps nagging her parents with insipid questions about how technology answers her mutherfucking inquiries.

R80, I hate that one with the little kid too. Children's voices and speech impediments are not cute to me, they're annoying -- quickest way to lose my attention because I hit the MUTE button immediately.