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Let's be Meghan, Duchess of Sussex

OOOOOOOH, I am so litigious and controlling!

by Anonymousreply 7008/03/2020

OP, did anyone ask us whether we were okay with your thread?

by Anonymousreply 107/30/2020

I should wear a mask when I leave the house, in order to prevent the spread of COVID-19.

by Anonymousreply 207/30/2020

I'm the borrowed tacky gigantic McMansion that is supposed to be hidden from prying eyes, even though I am in Malibu.

by Anonymousreply 307/30/2020

I'm sleeping with Harry and you're not.

by Anonymousreply 407/30/2020

I’m the price tag on a borrowed skirt, fluttering in the Tongan breeze.

by Anonymousreply 507/30/2020

I'm Harry's extremely patchy hair.

by Anonymousreply 607/30/2020

I’m the OP, a bitter drunken cunt with no life other than insulting the woman who in my warped box wine soaked mind, stole my man.

by Anonymousreply 707/30/2020

I don't read my press; I'm too fabulous, and frankly who cares what the griping peasants have to say!

by Anonymousreply 807/30/2020

R3 you're in the Hills, not Malibu

by Anonymousreply 907/30/2020

My hero/ine is YOU, the reader of this post!

by Anonymousreply 1007/30/2020

I’m the bottomless pit of a soul.

by Anonymousreply 1107/30/2020

I am the graying out that will eventually happen to this thread. Funny enough, I also seem to happen to all her plans too.

by Anonymousreply 1207/30/2020

I'm "calligraphy"!

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 1307/30/2020

I am the wedding tiara that got away.

by Anonymousreply 1407/30/2020

I’m cracking up at r13. That is too much.

by Anonymousreply 1507/30/2020

R12, you’ve happened already! My goodness, you’re an earlybird!

by Anonymousreply 1607/30/2020

I am an encouraging bananagram!

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by Anonymousreply 1707/30/2020

I’m the Panama hat

by Anonymousreply 1807/30/2020

I’m the drip-dry wedding dress waiting for another day.

by Anonymousreply 1907/30/2020

I’m the dangling tendrils

by Anonymousreply 2007/30/2020

I am not a nose job.

(That's not really her calligraphy, R13, is it? It's awful.)

by Anonymousreply 2107/30/2020

My US lawyer calls me the Duchess of Whoresides. He blames autocorrect and I know he's a DLer.

by Anonymousreply 2207/30/2020

I am the stupefyingly empty cavern that is my husband's brain.

by Anonymousreply 2307/30/2020

I have incorporated Meghan as a township in LA and will now be called the Duchess of Meghan.

by Anonymousreply 2407/30/2020

I'm in a city where even A-List superstars shop at Ralph's and buy their own condoms and booze at Rite-Aid, but I'm going to take three SUVs and a team of armed security to go to the doctor's office.

by Anonymousreply 2507/30/2020

I'm the pit stains.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 2607/30/2020

I'm the speed with which this thread will be shut down.

by Anonymousreply 2707/30/2020

I am the botox, fillers, collagen and plastic surgery. I'm just getting started.

by Anonymousreply 2807/30/2020

[quote] (That's not really her "calligraphy," [R13], is it? It's awful.)

Yes it absolutely is.

And I FIFY.

by Anonymousreply 2907/30/2020

Calligraphy is easy! All you have to do is make your cursive letters really super-regular and neat, and then put a little backwards flourish at the high point of any letter that sticks up to the top of the line!

Voilá!

by Anonymousreply 3007/30/2020

I’m her wedding shoes, which know their way down the aisle to the altar all on their own.

by Anonymousreply 3107/30/2020

More of Meghan's "calligraphy," with lots and lots of exclamation points.

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by Anonymousreply 3207/30/2020

Oh dear, we know that's you Meghan with your, Voilá! Sooooooo cute.

by Anonymousreply 3307/30/2020

I'm the eyes that instinctively find any camera within a five mile range to lock onto while flashing a big smile.

by Anonymousreply 3407/30/2020

I am that oh so-insincere smile.

by Anonymousreply 3507/30/2020

I am en route to my friend Oprah as I feel cooped up chez Tyler.

by Anonymousreply 3607/30/2020

I’m Harry’s rough trade side pieces.

by Anonymousreply 3707/30/2020

I’m the ill-fitting clothes meant to fit women without block-like body shapes.

by Anonymousreply 3807/30/2020

I am Whoresides.

by Anonymousreply 3907/30/2020

My fanny doesn't let no ginger in

by Anonymousreply 4007/30/2020

[quote] 'According to a Mirror Online lip reader, she told the prince: "It's very quiet compared to the screaming at your wedding."'

People were screaming at my wedding, but not at Euge's which I sabotaged by announcing The Coming of Archewell.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 4107/30/2020

I’m the pet dog that she abandoned for spurious reasons. You know me, I used to be on her blog and IG to show the world how caring she was. Next thing you know bitch got no time for me when Harry came along.

by Anonymousreply 4207/30/2020

I'm the rage towards the queen she dare not express to anyone.

by Anonymousreply 4307/30/2020

I am my life: I gave it to the BRF.

by Anonymousreply 4407/30/2020

I am time, amazed at the speed in which she went from fame to infamy.

by Anonymousreply 4507/30/2020

I am George and Amal, disappointed we made such a bad investment of our time and "friendship," such that it was.

by Anonymousreply 4607/30/2020

We lent her the goddam plane George!

by Anonymousreply 4707/30/2020

I am the smugness.

by Anonymousreply 4807/30/2020

I'm Harry's smelly farts which gave Megan a good excuse to evict him from the marital bed.

by Anonymousreply 4907/31/2020

I am the delusions in Meghan's swollen head and the raging anger in Harry's pea brain.

by Anonymousreply 5007/31/2020

I am the £68,000 I have agreed to pay the Fail in the court case I brought against them.

by Anonymousreply 5107/31/2020

I'm the £70k engagement dress, what Meghan wants, Meghan gets!

by Anonymousreply 5207/31/2020

I am Oprah, in hiding.

by Anonymousreply 5307/31/2020

I am the Clomid, making life hell on earth for everyone in a mile-radius.

by Anonymousreply 5407/31/2020

I am the irritating 20% VAT that Markel will pay on top of any court judgment.

by Anonymousreply 5507/31/2020

I am Harry's face, looking more and more like Prince Charles's as he ages, dashing all hopes he would have escaped the Windsor aging curse.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 5607/31/2020

I am the orthodontic cases Meghan wants Harry to wear.

by Anonymousreply 5707/31/2020

I am the Duchess Whoresides, bitch at R39.

by Anonymousreply 5807/31/2020

I am the Value in that Added Tax that provides money to all the press and none for MM.

by Anonymousreply 5907/31/2020

I am smarter than all you bitches!

by Anonymousreply 6007/31/2020

I’m dormant The Tig, waiting to rear my euphuistic head.

[quote] It was time. I wanted to make homemade pasta, but it scared me. It seemed so complicated - this delicate balance that I would overthink until I went full throttle Tracy Flick (à la Election) and took all of the joy out of the simplicity of it. So I just decided to get over myself, and dive right in. My goal: knead the dough, hand crank the noodles, and make a feast that would impress the likes of Mario Batali.

Now, I don’t know Mario Batali. Never met him. But I still wanted to make a pasta that would make him proud. (Something we can revisit on another day).

So there I was with a bag of caputo flour and a prayer, hoping that I didn’t absolutely ruin these grand plans of mine.

by Anonymousreply 6108/01/2020

[quote] I am smarter than all you bitches!

Yeah, you've really proven that so far! **snickers**

by Anonymousreply 6208/01/2020

I am the avocado on toast

by Anonymousreply 6308/02/2020

I am the claims that she is a strong, modern woman belied by temper tantrums and a NPD driven obsession over image.

by Anonymousreply 6408/02/2020

I'm the stress of keeping Harry entertained and not full of sorrow and regret during lockdown.

by Anonymousreply 6508/02/2020

Who on earth still cares about these people? Boring.

by Anonymousreply 6608/02/2020

R66 Why not post on a thread that interests you then?

by Anonymousreply 6708/02/2020

Get off this thread, r66.

No one wants you here.

by Anonymousreply 6808/02/2020

I am the brilliant DL Dangling Tendrils threads in all my stunning prescience.

by Anonymousreply 6908/03/2020

I am knowledge, intuition and wisdom. We all spotted the lying, delusional grifter from out of space.

by Anonymousreply 7008/03/2020
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