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Help me so I don't become a Karen

I have no issues with anybody but I am a white woman and I get very frustrated in stores or if people push me in the subway or if Im ignored in customer service situations when I am nice. I have aha. few major freak outs since moving to NYC but that was in the early days , do you think I need meds. It would be awful to end up on the internet

by Anonymousreply 1806/29/2020

Girl, do you.

by Anonymousreply 106/28/2020

First, let's get something out of the way. Being white has nothing to do with it. It's a racist concept that excludes POC. There is no white supremacy Karen, or a colonized Karen. Every (QT)POC deserves Karen representation. Don't be a racist!

Next, if you feel like you think you need meds, then you need meds. Don't doubt your intuition. Be proactive, get a therapist or counselor. If you're financially limited, there are lots and lots of resources on the internet with invaluable advice from countless mental practitioners. Consider a personal spiritual practice that may help you address your unconscious needs. Go outside the box and read Carl Jung. Keep trying!

by Anonymousreply 206/28/2020

I find treating people with decency and respect works a lot better than confrontation. Sure you will have the type of people who will try to walk all over you, but those type of people also rarely will back down because you are a bigger jerk, just refuse to be walked over without being jerk yourself. I also find and hour later I am still not upset when I just walk away than if I were to get in a confrontation.

by Anonymousreply 306/28/2020

Have a digital pet Tamagotchi and learn to be calm and serene.

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by Anonymousreply 406/28/2020

You don't seem to have the fortitude to live in NYC. Consider moving back to Springfield.

by Anonymousreply 506/28/2020

I was just talking to my sister about this -- she fits the Karen demographic but is so not one. What it boils down to -- and what makes you a Karen -- is the inability or unwillingness to handle any challenging situation. To yell at and castigate a service employee, especially of a national store, because they are following store policies made so far above their heads is the height of entitlement. And that makes you a Karen. Are you a "mom" who shops recreationally at national brand stores to fill your days and feel that the service you receive is never obsequious enough, and they never take your feelings into account? Then you're a Karen. Does anger become your go-to emotion when some new-to-the-workplace kid seems stymied by your reactions to not being able to exchange items for cash when you don't have the receipt OR the item? Are your kids in tow and are you actively humiliating them so that you get to exorcise some inner frustration? If not, proceed happily. You're not a Karen.

by Anonymousreply 606/28/2020

No I wouldn't be that bad but if someone pushes me I can get crazy. Need do that stuff about receipts. Thank you, this helped, made me realize I am not or don't have the ability to be a Karen as I wouldn't start spewing hate. We are living in crazy times. I am interested in the pet tamagotchi though.

by Anonymousreply 706/28/2020

Need do that stiff about reciepts = TYOPO = never do that stuff about receipts

by Anonymousreply 806/28/2020

Just don't expect civility in NYC. That way you will never be disappointed.

by Anonymousreply 906/28/2020

Just mind your own business. Don't use an accusatory tone with others. Men understand this. Starting a confrontation ends badly for all involved , and being a white woman will no longer protect you.

by Anonymousreply 1006/28/2020

It is a fine line. All the Karen videos I see are clearly where self-perceived entitlement has overtaken basic common sense. But because most customer service has become designed to frustrate and impede legitimate customer issues to maximize costs, you do have to be more of a squeaky wheel to simply get basic transactions done. Karens are typically born, but also made through a commercial culture designed to fuck people over for profit.

by Anonymousreply 1106/28/2020

Don't act up in public, be firm, but polite. And realize that not every transaction is going to take 90 seconds. That being said, don't apologize or feel guilt for being who you are or think you belong to a uniquely awful demographic . I worked in retail /food service /customer service for years and the idea that ONLY white women act up over petty things is BS being pushed by the media. And if a service worker seems rude, don't take it personally. They have to put up with a lot of crap and you don't know what they were dealing with before you came in.

by Anonymousreply 1206/28/2020

I think you need meds.

by Anonymousreply 1306/28/2020

As someone who used to work in customer service, I can assure you that the people working behind the counter do not control what's in stock, what anything costs, or what the store policies are. If a situation is crap, they are probably silently agreeing you, but of course they can't tell you out loud that their employer is acting in bad faith. They also don't control staffing levels, so a long wait in line isn't their fault, either. Bottom line: don't take your frustration out on people who didn't cause your frustration.

Of course, rudeness from a customer service rep is unacceptable, but even then it is not a Personal Statement on you. They are probably rude all day and not likely to get far. You can indeed "speak to the manager" if the rudeness is over the top; just try not to freak out an wind up as the trending topic on Twitter. :)

by Anonymousreply 1406/28/2020

Op is gonna snap & it will be a Karen moment. OP already set it up: OP freaked out before. OP needs meds. OP ‘s major fear is being caught. Let us know so we can follow your downfall!! You’re going to be canceled OP!!

by Anonymousreply 1506/28/2020

OP, just keep being polite and don't allow anyone to make you lose your cool in public (because even if you're in the right you'll be filmed and vilified) and you'll be fine.

You just keep on being you.

by Anonymousreply 1606/28/2020

Get a tan.

by Anonymousreply 1706/29/2020


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