Stupid first names.

Cunt Flappiea

X Æ A-12

Sadboi

Jose.

Whisper is the stupidest name I've ever heard.

Blanket

Let's just make up names so we can post something.

Tiffany

Keith

Keith

Wilbur, Buford, Mortimer, Eugene - Eunice, Gladys, Agnes, Dorcas

Cindy

Cuntflaps

The Mississippi.

I am going to follow that river to its source this year.

That is a stupid name for a river.

Does anybody else want to drive with me up the Mississippi?

I do, R15!

I have always wanted to do the Mississippi from Lake Itaska to Pilottown, by train, by boat, and by car.

Your favorite: Mississippi or Mississauga?

Chudney.

Kevin

I had to bump. This poor, now-deceased grandfather was not responsible for naming his grandkids. But according to his obituary in today's paper, they are....

--LaiLah Jayd! --Jaxon! --Treyton! --Addyson!

Whisper is the funniest one. Imagine calling out your kid at the playground. It's so unimaginative. I wonder if I could come up with a dumber one.

Peaches

Fifi Trixibelle

Heavenly Hiraani Tiger Lily

Pilot Inspektor

Saint.

North.

Psalm.

Chicago.

Oh, that wacky Kanye and Kim!!

Camping earlier this summer, the children at a nearby campsite were named Sierra and Rocky. The parents let the kids roam all over the campground, then shouted their names every five minutes, like it was their own backyard.

Yes, OP, Nevaeh is quite stupid. Nevaeh, the opposite of heaven. So you’re effectively naming your child hell.

[quote]Camping earlier this summer, the children at a nearby campsite were named Sierra and Rocky.

The parents stopped having children when they realized they couldn't spell Adirondack or Allegheny.

Abednigo

OP, when I was in high school with her, Ms. Griffin spelled her name Kath-e. That was a red flag.

Keighleigh

This absolute cunt of a girl I went to high school with decided she was going to change her name from Katby to Kathé. When I pointed out that would completely change the pronunciation (to kath-AY) she told me I didn't know what I was talking about. She was not only a cunt, she was a stupid cunt. I was able to get everyone to call her "Kath-AY." We really hated each other.

Ellen

Maverick. Heard that one a couple times recently.

Sterling

Abcde. Ab-si-dy.

Parents who name their kids awful names should be charged with child abuse.

Glenn for a female.

Hahahahaha

Simeon

Neely

Raddix

I had an ex whose daughter was going to name her child, December.

"Brooklyn" or "Madison" for a girl. The first is genuinely awful, and the second is a male name meaning "Son Of Maud".

Kids are being given dog names nowadays.

Apple

R30, I would have been your best friend. Hahaha.

I’m not going to make fun of the obviously trashy people. I’m going after the pretentious people with money who think a name is going to tip things further into their favor by giving their kids names like Serena, Piper, Gray, Brooke, AVERY, Hudson... it’s doubly funny when oh never mind it’s just mean to even say it.

Kayleigh Paxton Brixton

Brook Lynn

Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!!!

I knew a woman at work who named her son Arbie. We referred to him as America's Roast Beef behind her back.

Ivana

Ivanka

Melania

Ghislaine

I knew of a couple who named their daughter “Hawley”.

Not “Holly”.

HAWLEY.

You can just hear the banjos and shabby house with that one.

Female (pronounced Fe-mah-lay)

[quote] Glenn for a female. Hahahahaha —M.

You should talk, Meryl.

Donald

Speshale - saw that one on a reality show 11 years ago.

[quote]Peaches

Hehe, that's a nickname what gentleman callers call me back south.

Americans who pay tribute to their Irish heritage with names that are just too Irish like Siobhan...most haven't been to Ireland.

Omni. This was in the mid-90s. She named her daughter after a Dodge.

Boris sounds sorta cute tho.

Stefonknee

I can't understand people who still name their kids Adolf in Europe...WTF

Fontanelle

Money

Clitorious

Carter

Seen on name tags at stores recently: Trentin, Chrystyan, Kameron.

Jovan. On a white boy some time in the 90s.

My white trash cousin who became a grandmother at the ripe old age of 37 has a grandaughter named Kaveyah. She is also married to a guy who is in prison, married him AFTER he went to prison and posted pictures of the corpse of her stillborn second grandchild on Facebook complete with two outfit changes. The first one was a leather bomber jacket and I can't remember what the second outfit was. Oy. I forget the baby corpse's name but I'm sure it was Smith Wesson or Dixie Rebel or something.

Louise Anna

Rodneka

R64 OMG! That is so tragic yet so revolting.

Joe. Kamala.

Blade

Briar

Finney

Ansel

Cooter

Lashette

Steamy

Darkeen.

My cousin named her first child (a daughter) Viper.

Soon-Yi

Woody

Topramenesha. Google it, I didn't make it up.

....

Tiphone pronounced as three syllables was a defendant on Judge Marilyn.

Kviiilyn

This one is real, so I'm not going to type the whole thing, but the first syllable is "Trash." Who does that to a kid?

An Indian name pronounced as “Shitheed” but written as “Shithead”

SSSST - Pronounced “Forest”. (Four S T). Someone I know actually has this name.

Sloan. I find it ridiculous. Especially for a boy.

I know it’s not as bad as some, but it bothers me.

Jaxon

But, Jackson is fine.

Ashlynn

Brielle

Dawnielle. Thankfully I’ve only known one of these

Caitlin in Irish ☘️ is pronounced Kathleen.

Wattsin. Why Watson wasn’t good enough I don’t know.

Topsy

Kregg

I work with a girl named Aslhy. It was meant to be Ashly, but someone misspelled the name on the birth certificate and the parents never changed it. She still pronounces it ‘Ashley’

Dustin

"Shampayne"

Topher. So stupid.

Just seen in an old lady’s obit: grandson Oaklyn

Jhmyle (pronounced 'Jamil').

Another poor kid who will go through life having to spell his name for everyone.

There was a Cydnei at my previous job. It looks like it should be Cindy but it's Sydney.

Orel.

Why would you do that to a kid?

Ones ending in “-den”:

Trayden

Camden

Sladen

Jayden

Branden

Glaeden

etc.

Delacia

Declan

R98 my nephew is named Camden. I tried my hardest to get my brother to use the kid’s middle name (Joseph) as his first name instead. He said no.

Nine years later and I still don’t like the name. But the kid is a fun little guy, so I suppose that’s the important thing.

Buford.

Always think of that Tanya Tucker song - not sure of this spelling though:

What's your mama's name child, What's your mama's name? Does she ever talk about A place called New Orleans? Has she ever mentioned A man named Bueferd Wilson? What's your mama's name child, What's your mama's name?

Le'mongello

Jesus

Phongenia. She's in a TV commercial and seems sweet.

Aiden and every rhyming variant. I was a teacher and had a little bastard aptly named “Jailen” and another called “Miking” pronounced “My King”🙄

Messiah

I worked with a kid named messiah once and he thought he was the shit. But he was really an obnoxious twerp.

His buddy Brian was cool though

Trichelle.

Schapelle

Jussie

Everett. That was very popular four or five years ago. Four of my friends named their sons that. At least it hasn’t been used for girl, yet.

I’m not a fan of trendy names. Give me basic ones any day.

Julian

Michelle, Nancy, Alexandria, Elizabeth, Kamala, Tulsi, Joe, Bernard, Peter.

[quote]Julian

Bitch, please...

Conrad. What a dumb name.

Donald.

[quote] Camping earlier this summer, the children at a nearby campsite were named Sierra and Rocky.

Better than Rocky and Bullwinkle.

Once, when I was working at a Rec Center in town, I was signing up kids for a free recreational time in the gym. A mother who looked like your typical hefty fly-over country frau walked up with a cute girl of about 8 or so. I asked for the child's name, and the mother responded, " Imogene" ( I am using my own spelling of the name here for reference.) Knowing how picky and *creative* people are these days with the spelling of their kid's names, I asked het politely, to spell it for me. Without missing a beat, the woman said, "I- M-A-G-I-N-E- isn't it wonderful?? I just LOVE old fashioned/ European names and thought it would be PERFECT for our daughter!"

I almost snorted out the coke I was drinking!

Candy

Otis

Augie

Ugly sounding name

Zhan Luke

(real name of a kid born during first run of "Star Trek: The Next Generation."

Female

(Parents pronounced it Fe-MALL-ay.)

They didn't know what to name their daughter and were glad when they saw the chart and thought the hospital had named the baby for them. They kept it, at least for a while.

True. I worked in the state office that reviewed vital records and when we saw this one we checked with both the hospital and the parents. They didn't care when we explained - um - the issue.

Khaleesi, its Dothraki for "Hitler"

Willard

Elmer

Apple.

Jihad(girl)

Mo’nique

Pilar

Xavi

Bubba

Nigel

Cecil

Peregrine

Cholmondeley

Humphrey

Shaniqua

D'Shawn

Ondray

Shaquille

Ebonee

I named by twins Maverick (boy) and Memphis (girl).

McKayla instead of Michaela.

Keleigh instead of Kelly. Actually, any first name where the kid will always have to spell it out for people. Why do that to the kid? You’re not being clever, parents.

Archie Harrison. So trashy, unfortunately.

Kellyanne.

F&F r134