Should I shave my crotch, asshole and balls for a potential date?

If you're thinking of going on a date right now, you should have bigger concerns than hairs sprouting out of your pubic area.

R1 Calm down, Mary. I know you've been holed up in your bunker for the last 2 months or possibly much longer but I didn't require your input on my social decisions. The date is going to consist of a quiet night in watching a movie and making dinner. We're both adults. You can kindly go back to your terror porn binge and cry your eyes out over a quarantined family kissing each other goodbye through a plastic sheet.

It's getting quite old for the rest of non-hysterics.

OP can I have your stuff (minus the STDs) ?

[quote]Should I shave my crotch, asshole and balls for a potential date?

Since you have the razor already, may I suggest slitting your throat as the sensible alternative to your suggestions?

I see we're doing revenge of the shut-ins, agoraphobes and sociopaths a la R4. The one moment they can feel slightly less pathetic and alone by getting others to humor and indulge their constant state of fear.

In two weeks, R2 will create a DL post entitled, "I Have a Fever and Dry Cough. Panicked I Have the Virus. Help me!"

This should be a non-issue until the third date. Whore.

I've already done that one, R6. The replies were much more outstanding than "slit your throat for daring to venture outside."

Fucking incels.

OP sounds like a real charmer. I'm sure this date go well, hairy asshole or not.

[Quote] The date is going to consist of a quiet night in watching a movie and making dinner.

These are activities for which you normally don't shave your ass.

OP is 80 years old and barely has any time left in the world. No one needs to know what you do with your asscunt or any other of your revolting holes.

I wouldn't suggest slitting your throat for daring to venture outside, but for shaving your crotch, asshole, and balls? Slit away, smooth freak.

OP must be from one of those Southern redneck states that "ain't afraid o' no stupid fake liberal virus." And thanks to idiots like him, hundreds of thousands will die. But by all means, shave your ass!

OP is the kind that shaves for the date, then a few dates later gives up and it's back the the over grown dreads down there. Typical bait and switch date.

R10 = Aziz Ansari's platonic careerist date

Shave your ass (and the rest of your parts) and sit in gin.

R14 I mean you're not wrong. I'm definitely planning to be wed by the second date and by then he'll be stuck with me and my hairy discolored hole for the rest of the foreseeable future.

[quote]So far I know he likes rimming so not douching is definitely off the table.

So you were only going to clean out if his mouth was going there? But otherwise he gets a shit surprise if his dick gets up in there? You sound like white trash OP.

R18 I've never had a "shit surprise" or had my hygiene questioned but you've given me something to think about.

R19 Oh, come on, OP. You've never had a thought in your life.

R20. Zing. Now tell me if you think I should wax my crotch or at least shave around my boitaint for my "clean cut" type gentlemanly guy. I'm used to dating schlubs and this ones at least 1 suit.

Maybe I should just come with half my pubes shaved as a little clue that I'm neurotic and a bit nuts early on.

LOL! If my partner kicks the bucket and I put myself on the dating market again, I don't think I'll be asking DL for advice.

R21 If it matters to you that your crotch is smooth when the ER doctors move you to the morgue, go for it!

R13 I'm the idiot for knowing that my date could result in, at most, 2 deaths.

R24 validates the Southern redneck "intelligence" factor when it comes to this pandemic.

OP I ask you question. Can you Be Best with hairy cock and balls? No you cannot!

R25 I will gladly put my intelligence and prudence concerning this pandemic, my healthy immune system that has already been exposed to and successfully fought off this and other strains of the Coronavirus, and my general ability to get laid against yours any day. You people are simply unworthy of the 98.5% shot of living you have once exposed to this rather benign-in-most-cases virus. I know that's really upsetting to hear when you've been dunking your groceries in bleach for the better part of a month, but there it is.

"Boitaint" is a word I could have done without seeing. Ever.

R27 Get a load o' Wonder Woman here.

Sorry I meant to type:

[quote] my healthy immune system that has already been exposed to and successfully fought off this and other strains of the Coronavirus, and it is now ready to take on the ass flora of gentlemen callers.

Pronounce it in French, r28. It's less offensive.

[quote]dunking your groceries in bleach for the better part of a month

This phrase I'm going to remember when this is all over.

R30 Ass flora of my gentlemen callers? MARY. Hopefully he washed his dick from his last lay if I'm expected to douche..

OP will get anal warts, date will end in tears.

[quote]OP will get anal warts, date will end in tears.

I dunno r33, I suspect it will end in hilarity.

Don’t use a razor! Shave it down with a clipper with a guard. This will eliminate razor burn or chafing and leave a slight fuzz. This will blend in with body hair on your legs so it doesn’t look or feel weird a week from now.

Wear 100% COTTON underwear if you shave and avoid wearing tight synthetic blend pants so it doesn’t rub and cause ingrown hairs later.

Ass Flora, Dick Fauna and Balls Merryweather are a gay Sleeping Beauty's fairy godmothers.