Quarantine Loneliness

Sorry to hear it, Ernst. My partner and I are here with our pup, it’s good to have him. I can’t imagine what you’re going thru.

Thanks, R1. I’m hanging in there.

Buddy, my 6YO Flat Coated Retriever, is keeping me company the best he can. He’s a really good boy, but it just isn’t the same as having a person here.

You're so lazy, Ernst. You could be turning tricks, on the street or online, but instead you want your husband to keep busting his back for both of you.

Thankfully, it doesn't bother me too much. I've lived alone for so long that it's all I know, plus I'm just a homebody anyway, so I'm fine. That said, given the situation, I will just be glad when it's over and we can all live our lives fully again.

I'm not lonely. I just feel like I'm going insane. Like, I can't believe this is reality. So, I'm dissociating. And really glad I have enough intoxicants in the house to both keep myself buffered from reality for the extended future and/or to off myself if I get sick.

Perfect time for the niece/nephew troll to die a vicious death. Fuck off, troll.

Right now is actually a pretty great time to get in contact with old friends, classmates, relatives who you haven't spoken to in awhile. There are a lot of people who I mean to talk to, but busy life just gets in the way. Reconnecting with them has been one of the more positive aspects of this ordeal. Everybody is in the same boat, with the same fears and concerns, so even if you feel lonely, it's nice to know you're not alone.

OP, you need to stop being lonely and start updating your resume.

You can't assume you'll be taken back in a month. In fact assume you won't

You need to start planning out where you're going to look for work, then start planning on a reduced budget and how you're going to pay your bills.

If you're bored, start doing exercise. Push ups, sit ups and all sorts of other type of callisthenics can be done with no equipment.

Then clean your home, deep clean. By the time you're done washing all the walls, they will be dirty again.

R8 you are a real ray of fucking sunshine.

Four days in I was so lonely I packed up and drove sixteen hours to be with my mom and siblings. Im hunkering down here until this is over, whatever that will look like

R10 Nice, so then you can give them all the virus. Cunt.

I’m ok at home. I just don’t like the fact that it’s not safe to go out. I like swimming at my gym and having lunch but it’s closed.

I’m also having some issues with adjusting to the fact that this is, indeed, reality.

I have dogs, cats, and birds who keep me company. I retired early due to medical issues.

R12 did you catch the aids? Sometimes it just sneaks up on you. You are getting spit roasted by a million guys then voila! You've caught the aids.

I live alone and have been thanking the universe all week long that no one is quarantined in here with me. Most people I know with spouses and/or kids are feeling murderous already.

I am staying g with my mom - only (old) child - in my mind my mom has always looked like Laura Petrie we have always been extremely close - suddenly it seems like she has aged rapidly and she seems a little off. She is 83 - but has been fantastic forever. Usually being in and out and busy I haven't noticed it as much - it has hit me like a gut punch. She forgot an important call she made the day before - I thought she was kidding .... I know her thyroid has been off but this has made me so sad. We are here in La where it is "Shelter in place" and raining this week. The wall to wall coverage has made it eerie. I call and texted a few friends to check on them and no one responded - I am feeling like a total loser at the moment - This too shall pass - it is always a fun relief to check in on Datalounge - watching Good Wife a d overnight reruns of Nypd Blue on Hi network. Thanks for the ear ...OH They just announced that Kenny Rogers died

I can be a very solitary person. But doing this for weeks or even months on end is going to be very difficult. My family all lives on he other side of the country and I think it’s very possible I will never see them in person again.

I can be a very solitary person. But doing this for weeks or even months on end is going to be very difficult. My family all lives on he other side of the country and I think it’s very possible I will never see them in person again.

Maybe you should stop being a bitch and answer all the questions we ask you. Is your 6'6" husband a total top who refuses to touch your puny cocklet?

How many of you had hoped along with me that the "puny cocklet" cunt would be among the first to get the corona virus?

[quote] Buddy, my 6YO Flat Coated Retriever, is keeping me company the best he can. He’s a really good boy, but it just isn’t the same as having a person here.

Ernst, you have a husband who loves you and who goes out to work to support you financially. You have a retriever dog who is inadequate for your needs because "it just isn’t the same as having a person here." Honestly, you sound ungrateful for everything that you do have.

Make some dinner, clean the house, walk the dog if that's possible in your area.

I'm starting to think you're hopeless & selfish.

My BF's company provides staffing for adults with developmental disabilities. His role is very much 'essential', while I was already on short-term disability when all these disease precautions were implemented. He's working harder right now than ever to try to maintain staffing for his clients, while the State has cancelled most of the workshops on which his company depends. I wish there was some way I could pitch in to help him with his job, but I'd just get in the way. So I just make sure I'm always available when he needs to 'vent' (he's having a tough time), and I try to touch base with my other friends and relatives I know who are house-bound. Get lots of walks in with your dog, and try to make some of your partner's favorite meals. In a real partnership, it's important that you know how to take turns taking the lead: it can be really hard when it's your turn to be a supporting player.

Hang in there, Ernst. This too shall pass.

If anything, the cunts posting on this thread (you know who you are) should remind you of how awful some people can be, and grateful to sequester yourself away from them for awhile.

Email/message friends and family to stave off loneliness. There's FaceTime and Skype, too. Right now there are a lot of people with time on their hands who are also feeling lonely, but they might not reach out. You do it.

I can't stand it!

R7, I’ve been doing some of that. What I have found is a lot of people in my circles are in essential roles and do not have as much free time right now. I do have some, but not as many as I had thought.

R8, I’ve been keeping busy with some cleaning, but I can only do that for so long before it is unbearable. When we moved, my husband and I put a (small) in-home gym in our basement. I usually favor running outside, but I’ve been playing around there too. I don’t actually know what I’m doing, but I am faking it pretty well, I think.

R16/R17, I am sure we will return to normal at some people. I’ve been watching the governor’s press conferences each day and they seem to think it is going to all blow over...eventually. The scary part to me is the variable time frames, they range from a month to 18 months depending on which source you look at.

Im working on that, R20. I am very grateful, it is just lonely here by myself. I am sure to remind my husband (and Buddy) often that they’re great and I appreciate them.

Thank you, R21. I know how you feel. He’s been venting quite a bit at the end of the day. I’ve been trying to be really helpful, but I am immunocompromised, so I can’t really do some of the things that would be helpful (going to the store for him or really doing anything outside the house) so I feel even worse.

Hang in there, everyone. Thank you for the support.

Hang in buddy, it will pass. We just need to start getting some good news.

Are you on a spectrum Ernst? You don't even know how to go to the store? Just ask him what to buy and do it for him. How do you even function in life?

OP, you did the right thing by posting on a discussion forum, even if you get a bunch of snarky retorts on DL, it's a connection...

Hang in there, Ernst. This too shall pass.

[quote] Are you on a spectrum Ernst? You don't even know how to go to the store?

He said he can't go to the store because he's immunocompromised, not because he doesn't know how. Are you on the illiteracy spectrum?

That said, Ernst's marriage sounds way too father-son for my liking. I couldn't deal with a partner who was not my equal and had to be treated (or wanted to treat me) like a child. If it works for them, though, that's their business.

BTW, Ernst, if you don't mind my asking, why are you immunocompromised?

Thanks R25/R27/R28

I am diabetic. So I shouldn’t be out and exposed to too much. MIL is a nurse practitioner and says I shouldn’t worry too much, but Husband doesn’t want me to go. He passes the grocery store on the way home, so it isn’t too big of a deal.

R29, that really isn’t how our relationship is/has been long term. Right now, sure. I can’t really leave the house, I don’t work, etc. But we moved here for his job and that’s why I’m not working right now. I had a job, I used to cook quite often, did all of our laundry, walked the dog, cleaned, etc. It has only changed since we moved.

I’m an extremely solitary person due to my isolated childhood, although I also really enjoy communicating with people when I can, and have been told I’m not too bad at it.

So I’d say this is all abnormally normal for me.

Hey Ernst post a picture of your dog unless you need to wait for your husband to come home to do it since it's too advanced for you.

Check in periodically, Ernst. We are always here. You have friends, we just can’t see you!

Thanks, R33! Yesterday was much better. We just layer around and then watched the Governor’s daily press conference. He announced that Ohio is going to a stay at home system, which was the one thing that was going to cause my husbands crisis team to work from home, so starting tomorrow he’ll be here with me all day. He still has to work, but it’ll be nice to have someone here, I think.

Do you have any animals? I have a small parrot who is good company. She tucks herself into my neck while I read.

You have a husband, I have little sympathy for you.

Pettiness aside, call up some friends and gab. Set a few social dates. Start a Netflix watch group. An episode every could of days of a show none of you have seen, then chat about it.

r17 I don't mind the solitary life as well, but I was always able to leave the house. It's the house arrest that's making this unbearable.

R36 Well Ernst has no friends so it's not possible. He also has no job and he ghosted his foster family. Meghan and Harry would be so proud of him.

Jeeze, guys, stop picking on Ernst already! You people, I bet you’d take the Christmas Moose’s last peanut.

Ernst, I am sorry to hear that Buddy is a dog and not a moose, but hopefully you can still teach him to play Whist. He’s a Retriever, so why don’t you make him retrieve your lunch for you? Be creative. Tell him you’re going to drop him off at the pound if he doesn’t shape up.

Your pal,

I'm Lorna Patterson and OP is the frau:

[quote] [R29], that really isn’t how our relationship is/has been long term.

Well, sorry if I've mischaracterized your relationship Ernst, but seems to me that way back before C19 came along, your posts about your husband were generally along the lines of "I want to do _____, but my husband won't allow it," "I'm not really into ______, but my husband loves it, so ...." "I thought I could handle _____, but my husband insists on helping/protecting/accompanying me," etc.

Abnormally normal for me, as well, R31. I'm only a couple of steps from being a recluse. Take, care!

I hate to say it, but I'm in Hog heaven. Love being alone and doing what I want when I want. Just my nature I guess. Love keeping in touch with friends, but I have always treasured my alone time, as DL Icon Barb Bush would say, this is working out quite well for me.

If you're feeling lonely, reach out to the many, many, many different people and activities you can do online. There is absolutely no need for anyone who has internet access to feel lonely.

I do feel for the people who don't have that though, they must feel incredibly isolated. I am most definitely a home-body and I don't need to see people all the time but I know I can if I want to online.

OP - you have close family and a husband. Embarrass de richesses

Yes, R41, he is definitely involved. I feel bad now for complaining. He’s very supportive and I take that for granted sometimes. But he’s definitely not controlling. He has many talents and I’m definitely more of a “go with the flow” kind of person so I just go with it.