Behind Closed Doors: The Facts of Life

Thanks for the reminder, OP.

Already set my DVR.

My asshole: behind closed doors

"I woathed Wisa, who pwayed Bwair. I wanted to pound her fucking fat face into a bwoody pulp"

--Geri Jewell

Blair was homophobic. I realised this upon a rewatch of a Season 1 episode where she insidiously convince Cindy that there is something wrong with how she expresses herself to other girls. Unfortunately, I worshipped Blair as a kid. :(

I did a writeup about it years ago (the scene as well as Welchel being on Survivor). It doesn't look like the embedded video of the scene is there anymore. But, I did quote a great deal of the interaction.

During the first season that show aired , Welchel did some odd school speaking tour. She came to my high school and was all humble yet prissy talking about her life. Afterwards , Up With People came running down the aisles and did a nifty song and dance show. For reals, not shitting ya.

[quote] Afterwards , Up With People came running down the aisles and did a nifty song and dance show.

Was Glenn among them? That was her little group, wasn't it...

You seem to have an encyclopedia knowledge of my life. I just wrapped a Ron Howard film and have a Tony-winning director on board to helm the film version of Sunset Blvd. Hoping you're having a good time on the movie about the ... what was it? Oh, yeah ... prom. Is Donna Murphy available to dub your voice this time? She makes you sound better for sure.

Glenn dear, I am SO excited to see you as a hilllbilly skag later this year! It's the role you were absolutely born to play.

I wish Bea Arthur or Jean Stapleton had taken the role of the housemother, until they refused and it was offered to Charlotte as a spin off.

I DVR’d it. Did they say anything we didn’t already know ?(from all the other THS type things that have been done on FoL — and I’ve watched them all)

That said, between this and autopsy it seems like Reelz is becoming the new THS. I watched the Natalie Wood one over Thanksgiving. Those cheesy re-enactments are hilariously awful though.

The Lost Girls and the headmaster and Miss Mahoney finally got their two cents in.

@15:20

According to Lisa Welchel, she had no idea what her character was getting at in the episode with Cindy I referenced in R4, but the creators were.

For Season 2, it makes sense they kept Tootie and Natalie (a black girl and an overweight girl who had the most chemistry together). Blair was pretty memorable, so that left the other four vulnerable. Cindy was the last to go, which makes sense. I'm not sure why they replaced her with Jo. Maybe to add new blood to the show and/or they were afraid to push forward Cindy's storyline, who was already presented as a budding lesbian. So in came Jo, the butch girl who still liked boys. Interesting how out of the basic four, Nancy McKeon had arguably the most successful career since then (with Kim Fields in second). Obviously, Molly Ringwald post-Facts career blew them all out of the water.

I always thought Felice Schachter was the prettiest of the girls and did a good job when she was given something to do (like in the backdoor pilot on Diff’rent Strokes, in which she was a main character). Would have liked to have seen more of her.

Commentary!

[quote] I'm not sure why they replaced her with Jo.

Did you watch it? They didn’t replace her with Jo. They had three girls, Blair, Natalie, and Tootie that they deemed was the show.

Later in the next season they added Jo as a foil for Blair. Jo didn’t directly replace anyone.

R15 they got the inspo from Little Darlings, which is not surprising at all (I haven’t watched my DVR yet but I caught that part ).

[quote]I always thought Felice Schachter was the prettiest of the girls and did a good job when she was given something to do

Felice was cast to play Kimberly in "Diff'rent Strokes." She was pulled out and replaced by Dana Plato at the last minute. To make up for this she was the first girl cast in "the Facts of Life." Unfortunately, Felice's character was the most boring one of them all. She had no character development except she talked to Roger.

A hundred years later, I noticed Mckeon got the illustrious " and ___ as___ " credit.

when it should've gone to Cohn.^^ Sorry, typing from phone.

ALWAYS THOUGHT the 1st season headmaster was a big ole flamer... i don't know the actor's name though... even when i was young watching this 1st season i thought he secretly (and in real life?) had the HOTS for blair's gorgeous blonde sexy boyfriend played by b-level actor and chippendale poster model GREG BRADFORD.....

Did you watch the doc? They interviewed that actor but I now can’t remember his name.

I like how they mentioned Mindy's constant laughing at her own lines.

Jo and Rick were such a crashing bore. I was surprised how watered down Jo got by the end.

R21 if your question is of me R20... no, i didn't watch the documentary, i will though..

LISA WHELCHEL IS A BITCH .

R25, and so is Joan Collins!

Natalie used to take huge shits in the restrooms on the set. It made several actors angry.

Jenny O'Hara was iced about by Charlotte Rae apparently.

Charlotte ray pinched off huge loaves too

off topic, but just this week, i saw the awesome episode "dancing as fast as i can" where blair and jo takes mrs. g to the male strip club littered with actual at the time real life chippendales (dan peterson as the maitre'd! oh hell yeah!)... and she founds out her boyfriend Cliff is one of the male strippers!... anyway, it's mrs. garrett's birthday hence why the girls are taking her out...

i found it "interesting" that at the beginning of this episode they (director/writer) had Cliff kissing mrs. garrett wishing her a happy birthday and doing so on the mouth!! seriously! laugh!... i mean in real life, what young stud would kiss on the mouth a woman of mrs. garrett's age and whose the head mistress/den mother/nutritionist of a girl's school including in charge of and living with his girlfriend?! pervy kinky!....

i wonder if ole old charlotte rae got a kick and tingle kissing the handsome actor who played Cliff in that scene! laugh!...

Ok, ok, I’ll laugh! Stop telling me to.

In the 70s, kissing on the mouth was not unusual.

See: Dawson, Richard

[quote] Cliff kissing mrs. garrett wishing her a happy birthday and doing so on the mouth!! seriously! laugh!... i mean in real life, what young stud would kiss on the mouth a woman of mrs. garrett's age and whose the head mistress/den mother/nutritionist of a girl's school including in charge of and living with his girlfriend?! pervy kinky!....

Sounds pretty depraved to me

Future documentaries on this show need to focus on how in reality, Blair's character was the nice one and Jo's character was the bitch.

^I agree. One episode in particular where Jo pissed me off was when she borrowed and then carelessly broke Blair’s expensive watch, and then refused to pay for it because Blair is rich and has a dozen more just like it. I was team Blair all the way in that episode.

[quote]I always thought Felice Schachter was the prettiest of the girls and did a good job when she was given something to do (like in the backdoor pilot on Diff’rent Strokes, in which she was a main character). Would have liked to have seen more of her.

After Facts she co-starred in the comedy Zapped.

R20/R21, you’re talking about John Lawlor, who wasn’t so bad himself...

Amy Klobuchar would make a great Mrs. G in a FOL reboot.

^He’s divorced from Canadian actress Tantoo Cardinal and has six kids, so he obviously likes the vagine.

R33 good one about "depraved" and mentioning tom brady....

i just found it odd and weird that the character cliff would kiss mrs. g on the mouth. I mean seriously it would like kissing on the mouth the mother of your girlfriend! never mind, the suppose to be sweet act of him giving her a rose... because he's just being sweet to a little old lady however it was still a handsome hunk secretly male stripper doing this "aw, isn't he a nice guy to do this" act with a woman old enough to be his mother..... i admit i find it bizarre and yet arousing since i have a "fetish" for young studs with much older woman scenarios.

R37- I thought he was CUTE on the show. I would have licked his balls and more-as he looked in 1979.

R41 now he looks like Buck Henry.

Watch about half of it so far.

R30 What was funny about that episode was how Jo was more pissed off about Cliff being a stripper than Blair was.

Tootie was the only one of the core four to have another successful sitcom.

R44 she's also the only one to get humiliated as a Real Housewife.

She also was able to get a doll in her honor.

I'm still floored that it took 8 seasons for one of them to lose their virginity. Ridiculous.

R47 especially because it was implied in the first Season that Blair was a pretty “loose” girl.

Then they backpedalled in later seasons.

I agree, r47. I was even more shocked that it was the fat one who got fucked first.

Darn, I don't get that channel. Anywhere else to watch it online?

Between the four of them, if you count hand and mouth action, I'm sure gallons of collegiate seed were spilled in every dark corner of Edna's Edibles.

The producers had it planned for Blair to lose her virginity first, but when Lisa objected, Mindy happily volunteered. Lisa doesn’t even appear in the episode where Natalie has sec with Snake.

R43, i know, i know.. weird how in this episode they LITERALLY had jo acting like a jealous lover of blair's instead of just her friend.. it was WAY over the top the dialogue and the acting direction given to nancy mckeon in this scene! it was so obvious. just weird....

also loved the actor larry poindexter who played the handsome hairy chested waiter of mrs. g and the girls at the club... he was very hot in that 80's well male stripper kind of way, thick rich dark beautiful head of hair, hairy chest and handsome face... loved his flirtation with mrs. g as he took her order... i wonder if in real life charlotte rae was "getting the tingle" during this scene! laugh!.....

[quote] laugh!

Why do you keep telling us to laugh?

R54.. i'm NOT telling YOU to laugh or anyone else. In my posts, i mean I"M laughing... should i use instead "lol"?

Yes.

Tootie was the only one to rock a bowl haircut.

Jo was a leading lady of Lifetime shows and movies FWIW.

Also, R52, I remember Natalie & Snake Have Sex was a huge controversy. I may be misremembering, but I feel like Lisa Welchel refused to appear in that episode because it went against abstinence before marriage.

You’re not misremembering, r58.

In fact, r52 just mentioned it.

Jo stole Michael Damian's look.

I always thought Jo was the absolute bitch, not Blair. Lets not forget that she punched her. PUNCHED HER! On home and family Blair was described as the " girl you loved to hate" I was a teen when this show was on and Blair was never considered that. Snobby and self absorbed, but hated? Nah.

Jo was lez

Even as a kid I remember my mom chiming in how Jo was lez.

She was not. If anything she was a trans POC and your failure to recognize that is LITERAL VIOLENCE!!!1!!1one!

Blair was only truly unlikable in season 1. There were spots here and there throughout the rest of the seasons where she wasn't really likable either (the stripper boyfriend episode is one), but all in all she was OK, just eyerollingly self-absorbed.

I loved Blair Warner! She was my fave character.

R27 R29 Did Natalie and Mrs. Garrett not flush? Who was running in there checking the toilets after they poo'd?

I think we need a full investigation of this.

Blair had great hair.

R67, r27,r29 thats fucking hilarious!!!

R69, I realize third grade is closed for the duration, but maybe you should stick to video games.

R48 I thought they covered that in the first season? Blair almost gets raped in a van and then says something about how she pretends to be loose but she doesn't have any experience with sex.

I never understood why they got rid of Cindy. Maybe the blonde hair worked against her. But she was a tomboy with divorced parents and lesbo vibes lurking beneath the surface.

Cindy was disposable.

Tootie was a horrible Nellie Forbush.

Natalie had great hair during the Cloris Leachman/Stacey Q years. I just saw an episode recently and it was very Belinda Carlise-like.

You mean 'The Fats of Life', right OP?

Can we talk?

Their blood type was butter.

R76 I finally saw the whole thing, and one of the people (I think BTS) commented that it wasn’t the Joan Rivers comment that got to them, that was just “Joan being Joan” and it’s part of her job to make jokes about everyone — but the producers and agents who kept nudging them to lose weight, subtly or not subtly. I remember on another one of those shows I think Lisa said she walked onto the set one day and literally any good/fattening thing from the craft services table had been replaced with diet food. Sounds fun.

Was it true they used an extra wide camera lens to have all four girls and Charlotte Rae in the same reel?

Tootie was a horrible actress-period, R74. She couldn't sing and, good Christ, when she was acting scenes from West Side Story with Andy, she was horrifying. Let's not even bring up her turn as Eleanore Roosevelt or her juggling in "Make Mine Macaroni"

Didn't Blair promise Tootie a job as her maid after they'd leave school?

Girls! GIRLS!

I wonder if Kim FIelds made an acting choice to play Tootie as being an awful performer because she herself was a good actress most of the time.

I believe Tootie was suppossd.to be a good actress, just like Natalie was suppoaed to be a good writer.

Yes.

Meanwhile Jo's teacher whose life she ruined deserved his comeuppance. He was a horrible teacher.

They should have done a crossover episode with One Day at a Time, since they shot next door to each other.

Maybe Ann has to work with Eastland schools on a new ad campaign. Hijinks ensue when Alex goes with Ann and winds up getting caught in a panty raid.

always loved the episode"i'm dancing as fast as i can" when blair finds out hunky cliff is a male stripper! great seeing real life chippendales from that time in that show in the background at the strip club and gorgeous actor larry poindexter being the stud to wait on them....

however, i always found the episode off for 2 reasons 1) jo going WAAAAAAAAAy oveboard in protecting Blair was too odd and over the top! like she was literally fighting for blair's love over cliff's! and 2) the way that cliff and mrs. garrett actually kissed ON THE LIPS when cliff and blair came to wish her happy birthday? who does that? a boyfriend of a student and her "charge" kissing a much much older woman on the lips? and a short time later, him presenting a rose to her and her acting all lovey dovey and blushing! like cliff was on purposely teasing and flirting with her and she was welcoming it?...

R32, Dawson was an outlier. Outside of Family Feud how often did you see that? Also, the studio didn’t like it but he refused to change and asked the audience to write in on whether they approved or not. His core audience wanted to keep the kiss. None of this proves it was normal, though. The conflict wouldn’t have even happened at all if it were commonplace.

Did this special include that fucking cunt Pippa and that little queen in waiting blond boy they added, leaving people to think Blairs long lost child from a teen pregnancy had come to live with her?

I watched as a kid and wished I was in Andy's place whenever he was rough-housing with George Clooney.

I just watched "The Accused" tonight (after decades) and I had forgotten, Blair's Cliff IS THE LEAD RAPIST!!!!!!

Julie Ann Haddock turned out to be beautiful.

[quote]Did Natalie and Mrs. Garrett not flush?

Look! I told those honky bitches you need to flush it down if it is brown but did they listen? No!

Where's my hot iron???

I can only stand to watch from the Edna's Edibles to the Cloris Leachman seasons. Kim Fields chatted with Nancy McKeon and Mindy recently--who both look great, btw--on her IG.

I still watch every morning at 6 on Antenna TV.

Can't believe not one of the many backdoor pilots got the green light, but Gimme a Break ran for 6 seasons, and Silver Spoons for 5.

[quote]They should have done a crossover episode with One Day at a Time, since they shot next door to each other.

They were on different networks. A crossover never would have been allowed.

I would have liked a Fac5s of Life/ NYPD Blue crossover in which the girls gi into the city, get mistaken for hollers, abd are arrested, brutalized by the foul-mouthed police, and strip searched.

"Jo, I am mortified. A Warner does NOT spread her ass cheeks!" "That's not true, Blair. I've met your Uncle Alvin." "Oooooh, somebody's in troublllllle!" "I don't see what the big deal is, Blair. I got raped dressed as Charlie Chaplin." "Girls! Girls! We ALL have to turn our vaginal lips inside out so the officer can see we don't have contraband!"

Emmys for everyone!

R96, that would never happen, but there was a special episode where Tootie got lost in NYC, and a hooker and her pimp tried to recruit Tootie into prostitution. Also, there was an episode where Tootie got mixed up with a sleazy child photographer. Tootie saw some shit on that show. That's why she flipped the fuck out when Mrs. Garrett wasn't going to let her go see Jermaine Jackson.

I can see Natalie now being forced to blow Sipcowicz while Blair plays with her tits.

Haha so happy this thread has been revived! It’s funny I usually laugh at the lesbo Jo-Blair fan fic but I saw that Cliff episode the other week and I totally thought the same thing - she’s acting like a jealous lover. Same with when Blair’s bf is on coke. And I (sadly) used to have “serious” discussions with my high school friends about how in the right Blair was in that watch episode. Someone’s property is someone’s property no matter how much they have, how ridiculous.

R94 Not anymore

Kim Fields grew up in Hollywood on TV. Why does she talk in person like she grew up in Compton ?

Because she wants to separate herself from proper-talking Tootie.

"Why does she talk in person like she grew up in Compton ?"

You were raised by heterosexuals. Why, when you talk, do purses fall out of your mouth?

R97, that NYC episode was bizarre. They make no attempt to help that young girl, just leave her to her fate as an underaged prostitute.

Yeah, that would have been hysterical, R104! Maybe they could have all ended up dead in the alley after the pimp beats them to death. And....scene.

One Day at a Time and FOL shared many of the same writers and producers too

Both are Norman Lear shows through his Embassy production company

Imagine those two redheads Charlotte Rae and Bonnie Franklin acting together and hamming it up

The world wasn't ready in the 80s!

Damn you Mrs. Garrett!

[quote]Both are Norman Lear shows through his Embassy production company

Irma Kalish became the showrunner after Paul Haggis left. Now you would think that adding Cloris Leachman to the cast and having a former All in the Family and Maude writer as the new showrunner would have breathed new life into the show.

Yeah, no. Not only was Kalish responsible for the worst seasons of Facts, she wrote two of the worst episodes of the series (the introduction of Pippa and the awful series finale).

Then, after NBC naturally passed on the backdoor pilot, Embassy moved Kalish to 227 where she brought in Toukie Smith, Stoney Jackson and Barry Sobel as new cast members and finished off THAT show.

I never understood what they were going for with that final backdoor pilot. Blair and a bunch of kids. Exactly how the show started until they realized there were too many girls. So no lessons learned

Lisa Whelchel was already getting ready for her arranged marriage to her painfully gay husband (do the research on Steve Cauble if you don't already know) by the time FOL was wrapping up. She always says she was ready to leave show biz and become a good Christian wife and mother. So not sure how that would have worked into her plans if NBC offered her a starring role in a spin-off.

R107 the Paul Haggis years were definitely the best, in retrospect.

One Day at a TIme is FUCKING awful. I cannot believe I used to watch it when I was a wee lad.

Damn it, R111!

I was just watching this. Some of the first season girls look like they are wearing facial prosthetics in these interviews. Anyway, I liked the first season, it had a coziness to it. I’m actually surprised the Sue Ann character didn’t make the cut. She was very front and center during S1. I wasn’t a huge fan of Jo, she was too bitchy. Blair always tried to help her and she would treat her like shit. Besides other things mentioned, she nearly got Blair thrown out of the dorms when she couldn’t afford her room and forced her way into Blair’s when it was against the rules.

It’s funny that the best thing that happened to Molly Ringwald was getting booted after the first season. I’m kind of surprised McKeon stayed for the entire run. I do think the show went on too long. The last few seasons with the novelty shop were awful.

A FLUFF show from the 1980’s about a girls boarding school- What a GAY topic.