BREAKING: Internet Famous Hot Gay Instacouple are DEAD TO ME!

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And on February 14th... the beginning of the END!

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mrseventytwo

I can’t believe this man is mine!

Mr. Carson is not only an amazing human, but an incredible boyfriend. I feel the luckiest to call him my Valentine! ❤️❤️ #boyfriends #love #valentine #valentinesday #vday #feb14 #hallmarkholiday

Damn, I was hoping for a murder/suicide, preferably streamed on their IG stories.

Countdown to when this mess starts using Tina, MDMA and becoming a pass-around bottom.

Who are these Muscle Maries?

*Marys

That sucks! It's almost worse/harder to breakup for that reasons than it would be for cheating/betrayal. Hopefully they both find what they want!

We've lived our whole relationship out in the open, non-stop desperate for attention.... #dfa #desperate #vapid #travel #flakes

Carson Twitchell

Lead with love ❤️

@barrys Trainer 💪🏻

OC➡️NYC➡️Chicago📍

👬 @mrseventytwo

Let the sun SHINE in 🎶

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OMG HE hasn't changed his Insta profile yet!

I’m confused, am I supposed to feel sad?

And his former paramour:

Ryan

This is the year of change

I’m creating a fitness tech platform. Learn more @anygymusa

@tenthousand.cc shorts 20% off RYANL20

linktr.ee/mrseventytwo

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(So, basically, unemployed)

Puke

UGH, why do some gay men feel they need to live out some hetero normative DAD roll? Not against having kids if you are gay but I think if you are willing to break up a true love of your life over it, sounds selfish to me. I know some straight couples that chose not to have kids. It's not a requirement to have a fulfilling life. More often than not it's ego about leaving your legacy behind.

what sentimental tripe! get off the twatter ya vapid pair of marys!

LITTLE DID THEY KNOW...

@carsontwitchell

My funny valentine 👬🏻 what’s more important, love or laughter? I’m beyond lucky to have a surplus of both with you! I love you Ryan 🥰 happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

#carsandry #boyfriends #myfunnyvalentine #laughter #ca #chicago #amsterdam #ptown #travel #workout #aesthetics #relationship #tgif #friday #photooftheday

Whores

Whores

Whores

Whores

Whores

setting back homosexuality one squat at a time

Was THIS person the ~real~ reason???

The "doesn't want kids" thing seems like b.s. to me.

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@mrseventytwo

Holy shit that was hard!

I’ve had the opportunity to try more fitness classes lately. I LOVE the variety. Each has challenged me in different ways, which has helped me realize areas I need to focus on.

The focus at [solidcore] was hamstrings- I was dripping everywhere, working to failure within each round, and LOVING the burn.

If you’re hoping to gain more functional movement, and strength in lifting, it all starts with your CORE. This class should whip you into shape and humble you at the same time!

PS thanks to @alex.blahunka for introducing me to this! You made it look easy while I was laying down laughing at myself :)

One of these whores clearly contracted the coronavirus.

Here they are shilling for ASTROGLIDE

So one of them needed even MORE attention, and the best he can think of is to HAVE A KID that he can then post to Instagram as well. Disgusting.

#dadlives #travel #lookatmeplease #lookatmykid #attentionplease

FFS...they are insufferable

They're loving each other in the sunshine!

Or was it THIS WHORE coming between them?! "Friends"

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@carsontwitchell

Friends who lift together stay together! 👯Thankful to be starting a new year with this unicorn of a man on my side. .

#friendshipday #workout #quads #motivation #monday #photooftheday

There's nothing candid about that pic at R23.

We all know what 'unicorn' means

1. Who's the top?

2. I hate instagram (and I'm only 40).

3. Who's the top.

4. Um, I actually don't care.

they seriously come off as mentally ill.

5 days ago - presumably this is when they decided to break up:

@mrseventytwo

Thank you for all that you've done for me. I've grown more during the time we have been together than I could have ever imagined.

Experiencing true love. Compromise. A new perspective. .

Feeling valued. Appreciated. Supported. Loved.

Carson, you have given me so much.

Thank you for taking this journey with me.

Love, Ryan

@carsontwitchell

I love you with my whole entire heart, Ryan. Our lives will be full of love, success and fulfillment. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for being my best friend. Thank you for helping me become who I now am. ❤️

Ugh.

Who asked them for this information? Sheesh. They must have FABULOUS navels because they stare at them all day.

They're both foaming at the mouth for some anon

They're the type who can't deal with "negative energy", meaning they acknowledge real problems.

They watched this, one got maternal, the other repulsed.

One of them farted and the other was horrified

[quote] Who's the top

One of the guys on the other side of their bathroom mirror. I'm not sure which one, though.

Too bad they’re both not dead. That would have made a hell of a story.

I know a straight couple; same thing happened. He had been married before and had a son, who lived with his mother. The guy didn’t want another kid. The new wife wanted a kid, and knew this before she got married. They split for a while. She’s a very strong, attractive and funny woman. But in the end, she wanted to be married more than she wanted a kid. Eventually, she became a part-time step-mother to her husband’s kid. She never became a biological mother. Thirty years later, the husband and wife have had a great marriage together and no children between the two of them. The wife has no regrets that she chose her marriage over being a mother.

R12 yes X2, barf

How many weeks were they together?

This is why you have open relationships if you can't do monogomy.

*monogamy

Don't they have real jobs besides squats and beach hugs?

What's with the mrseventytwo business? Is that his IQ? I bet you a $50 neither one of them has a friend that is not a beautyboy.

R3 bless you. Thank you.

R38. Thanks for that.

Can we say shallow as all fuck? Jesus Christ on a stick! Part of a long term relationship is compromise. Who knows you might like the little brat or cunt.

I think the "no kids" is just a face-saving thing so they can make a big deal about breaking up and both appear noble. When the real reason is one of them decided to dump the other because someone hotter came along.

R47 Agree, and I really had no interest, but now I really want to know and I hope it’s real kinky and dirty lol.

I think the disagreement was actual over jockstraps. One was into them, the other wasn’t.

R49 yes, one wanted to promote them and become spokesmen for Nasty Pig jockstraps and the other thought that didn’t fit with their brand InstaHo image.

Curiously, Ryan is bi (preference for men) and I thought that idea of becoming a father would coming from him, but come from the gay one Carson... Interesting.

Please don't let one of these shallow attention whores have a kid.

Do I sound like someone who gives my kid brown water?

I am so disappointed they are not dead and it’s just a breakup lol dumb cunt OP with the clickbait!!!

The shorter attractive one who doesn't want children is now available. Give me a week and he'll be pregnant.

He brought home twins.

Anal wart twins.

These tacky faggots almost make me wish I was straight.

how is someone with around 50k followers "famous"?

"I love you completely but I long to have a son to take IG pics with. I'm sorry, it's over."

I can't relate to wanting a kid (that you haven't met) so badly that you would break up with someone you are so "in love" with.

This is why *I* hate us.

Who the fuck are these cunts? What are they Internet Famous for?

Insufferable, but not dead-dead.

I’ll help Carson get pregnant. Will definitely pump him full of sperm.

R54 technically, the subject is "instacouple" and the coupling is dead, so it does work and is factual!

A coupling is full of LIFE and LOVE... Until it is brutally slain by one of the pair that wants to promote a custom brand of poppers, and the other disagrees that it would work for his branding.

I weep for them. I know how hard it is to part with your SOULMATE.

Their species can't truly love anyone but themselves R60 it's not in their programming.

Any man as clearly vapid and self absorbed as he is should not be raising children.

How did they die?

good, fuck thrm for thinking they could be happy.

Honestly people who still want children this day and age seem so out of touch and self absorbed.

And of course! I 100% doubt this guy would even consider adoption. Like most gay sociopaths he’ll prob make a poor women carry his DNA.

Tired of gays who think babies are awards given out for “making it”.

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

NASA has launched shuttles with less precision and forethought than that ridiculously overwrought and masturbatory breakup statement. It made the Martin/Paltrow conscience uncoupling seem impulsive. That caption, or novel, is emblematic of a crippling narcissism. I had to sit on my hands not to troll him in the comments. To quote the great Dorothy Zbornak, go hug a landmine. That also goes for the enablers in the comment section of which there are waaaaay too many.

Hmmm.....unemployed, uneducated, overly worked-out guys not far from middle age. Why the fuck do we care about you? And also, bravo to the poster above that suggested a murder-suicide for these insufferable narcissists.

I was so sad... briefly.

Parachutes 🪂 didn’t open

R64 You go gurl

Did the bisexual one leave him for a woman?

As much as I think this is just yet another example of narcissism, I actually think this is quite a good idea. I've seen a few of these Instagay couples who post prolifically and then break up and say nothing about it which always strikes me as odd when they have lived their lives out on social media up until that point. At least for people who do know who they are and have followed their relationship they know what has happened and why - it's irritating when couples who constantly post their relationship online then get annoyed when people ask questions after they have broken up without actually acknowledging it (I'm thinking about porn couple Jesse Jackman and Dirk Caber as a prime example of this).

A couple that doesn't agree on kids should not stay together. You all are deranged. Too many men on this Earth to stay tied to one with diametrically opposed life plans.

R80 they're both either over forty or quickly approaching it, if you don't have one by now...

I'm not necessarily buying the whole he doesn't want kids and I do line. They both look way to into themselves to want to be tied down to rug rats. I'm more inclined to believe they've just tired of each other's naughty bits and want the freedom to go out and get all the strange they can get.

R82 agreed. The "didn't want kids" seems like a crowd-tested no-fault divorce reason so that both sides look reasonable and mature. We will see if the one that wanted kids ends up with one (my guess is no).

They can't be making enough from Instawhoring even with the paid posts they do to afford a surrogate baby oven, unless they have a Lesbian willing to do it for free.

[quote] Like any couple, we’ve had our issues.

Read: we’re both useless whores and constantly cheat on each other. We should open this up, right? I’m trying to use the issue of a “child” to force my slutty boyfriend to be monogamous.

You narcissistic cunts. What makes you think you’re relevant enough to make a statement about your split? Fuck you and your sad future.

Ryan is not that cute without the beard.

A famous(ish) former UK soccer player Gary Lineker and his wife Danielle divorced because she wanted another child and he didn't.

I'm sure the one who wants a kid has already looked into all the arrangements, i.e., finding a surrogate, interviewing at preschools, arranging for sitters at circuit parties, etc.

I wonder how much work goes into selecting the hashtags for a breakup post.

Is it as intentional as when you try to match your poppers bottle, cock ring, and jockstrap for an orgy?

Or is it more free-flowing, like deciding who to let fuck you bare at the the orgy?

R89 it’s exactly like that

He looks musical at R87.

Gasp!

R92 was that the Gay Gasp I heard.

Smiling through the tears.

The other one Ryan hasn't posted anything for three days. That means he's the one that was dumped. Carson has posted daily since then which means he's the dumper.

R95 yup, I tend to agree with you on that

Ryan is the sexy one. His body is more compact and he looks like a dude when his veneers aren't too exposed. They both have fake teeth & natural bodies. Carson has eyes the size of newt and a protruding jaw and that weird ass gay face smile. He's quite an ugly white boy. They both have nice feet - their best feature. Blessings to them. Men aren't meant to procreate if they lay with other men. Carson needs our prayers. He's all flat bottom but he ain't gonna find a man to make a baby with.

Dat face is painful. Don't give it to a child. Please donate Ryan's sperm to the surrogate Carson. Must be some of him still deep inside you somewhere. Scrape it out anvil head.

R98 Anvil head!! Thank you for that!.Right up there with Jen Aniston's nose full of nickels!.

[quote]Men aren't meant to procreate if they lay with other men.

R97 are you kidding with this shit, on a gay message board? Get that Frau b.s. outta here.

Mixed marriages never work.

R100, you’re the one who sounds like a frau having a hysterical meltdown.

Same Sex marriages are NOT meant to procreate. Adoption is possible, and a child from a previous closeted life would count, but two people of the same Sex cannot procreate.

Please don’t vote.

R102 kill yourself and we will have someone tow your corpse back to Lipstick Alley.