Chrissy Metz To Produce, Possibly Star In Inspirational Mountaineer Tale ‘Gorge’ In Works At Amazon

Will Chrissy meet the contract requirements?

She told her agent to book it on the title alone, a word which has provided her much inspiration over the years.

R2 beat me to it. Well played.

It's not an adjective (short for, god help us, "gorgeous") or a noun (a small canyon). It's a verb.

In Chrissy's case, it's a mantra.

Nothing could give DLers more pleasure than watching Chrissy Metz a-huffin' and a-puffin' all the way up a mountainside.

Except perhaps to watch her rolling her way down one, continuously, R4.

Which one is the mountain and which one is Chrissy?

Bitch, I ain't carrying THAT.

....

I heard that talks with Mt. Kilmanjaro have stalled. Apparently the mountain doesn't think he has what it takes to support an actress of Chrissy's heft.

"Kilimanjaro is a snow-covered mountain 19,710 feet high, and is said to be the highest mountain in Africa. Its western summit is called the Masai 'Ngaje Ngai', the House of God. Close to the western summit there is a dried and frozen carcass of a hippopotamus. No one has explained what the hippopotamus was seeking at that altitude."

A picture of the book's author. La Metz is a bit heavier, n'est-ce pas?

Now that we got the mountain, who is playing Kara?

is there blind casting?

[quote]Kara Richardson Whitely’s memoir Gorge: My Journey Up Kilimanjaro at 300 Pounds,

Umm, how is Chrissy going to lose 600 pounds in time to play this woman?

This will mean she will have to somehow get to the summit of Mt. Kilimanjaro.

How much does it cost to rent a freight helicopter?

The camera adds 843 pounds...as does 3,000 tubs of Duncan Hines frosting

You bitches have made so monstrous that I started laughing just anticipating the posts.

Working title for the film adaptation:

"Into Fat Air"

I hope there's not an elementary school at the foot of the mountain. Chrissy and Kilimanjaro would make the Aberfan tragedy seem like an hourglass being tipped over.

Who will play the lead sherpa who has to dangle a roast turkey behind him on a fishing line as enticement?

Chrissy hasn't seen 300 lbs. since the fourth grade.

Will Chrissy's contract require that Pon accompany her at all times?

Wardrobe by CHRISTO

Call me when Chrissy gets down to a svelte 300 lbs...

I assume she's playing the mountain.

I didn't read the book, is it about a Chrissy-sized woman who eats a 300-lb woman who hiked Kilimanjaro?

This is like the Werner Herzog movie "Fitzcarraldo," only in this case the steamboat will be played by Chrissy Metz.

The Sno Cones of Kilimanjaro

[quote]Close to the western summit there is a dried and frozen carcass of a hippopotamus. No one has explained what the hippopotamus was seeking at that altitude."

History does repeat.

This is just proof that she knows perfectly well that her weight is her meal ticket (so to speak). She has no intention of losing weight, because she wouldn't get projects otherwise.

If she wants to play someone who is 300 pounds, she is going to have to lose a good amount of weight.

I swear I read the title and first paragraph and thought this was from The Onion.

Looking forward to Gorge II: Purge

[quote]Gorge tells the story of Whitely, a woman determined to reach the summit of Mt. Kilimanjaro

I thought this movie was about an all you can eat buffet.

Haven't I suffered enough?

The jokes just write themselves with this one. Sorry Chrissy because I could stand to lose a few pounds too but your threads are funny.

Mt. Kilimanjaro? Chrissy has finally found a co-star bigger than her.

I assume this will be filmed in wide angle?

Timber!!!

I heard that she is also looking to remake Free Willy but she needs some swimming lessons first

Has the ASPCA been notified?

aint it easier jus to lose weight than suffer all the abuse that must follow her poundage??

I’m just giggling picturing her in a parka!

"Strayed, Heavily."

Well, if there is an avalanche during filming, we know the crew will survive.

I just assumed the title "Gorge" was in reference to Chrissy's ass crack.