Meghan Markle to campaign for Mayor Pete...

OPee killed by Aunt Bea.

Ben Affleck enters monastery.

... and Jennifer Garner converts to Islam.

Donald Trump Dead of Brain Aneurysm.

For a moment, OP, I thought this was an actual headline. Clearly, I need to go to bed.

Meghan McCain leaves husband for Aaron Schock: "He fucks me like a champ," an unrenpentant Meghan divulges

Oprah endorses Pete.

Trump apologises for all his madness and admits that he was born gay. He states that he felt mentally exhausted by feeling that he had to hide his orientation, hence his bad leadership behaviours.

He also states that he thinks Boris Yeltsin is cute but that Boris Johnson is sexy.

Connie Francis and Brendad Ickson In Knife Fight; Neither Survives

Meryl Streep concedes glenn close is the better actor

Definitive medical evidence proves pros and cons of circumcision

Rachel Maddow praises Mayor Pete : "ONLY HE CAN BE OUR SALVATION"

Don't be silly R10...I would never do that! Not even on an Oscarless G's deathbed! You hear me?!

Yesterday Meghan Markle was seen holding hands and kissing Prince Andrew in a Woking cafe. At first it was difficult to recognise the former Duchess as she has had extensive cosmetic surgery.

Friends said that they have been business partners, and grifters, for decades and have only recently become lovers. Meghan stated that their shared sense of not belonging and being trolled and abused by the media had brought them together. Prince Andrew smiled inanely and stated that he could not comment as "Mummy told me not to speak to the media people anymore and Charlie won't like it either".

The Duke of Sussex was asked for comment but did not return calls, emails or texts. This afternoon he was located at Brighton beach sucking Sarah Ferguson's fungal infected toes.

sorry - wrong thread

no - right thread. I need some sleep!

Mayor Pete sucessfully completes gay conversion therapy. "I feel like a new-- better-- man," a fresh-faced Pete reveals.

GAYLE & OPRAH TO WED THIS SPRING IN SANTA BARBARA! STEDMAN TO PERFORM DUAL ROLE AS BOTH OFFICIATOR AND MATRON OF HONOR.

"1994 Porn Film Surfaces Showing Melania Knauss Engaged in Gangbang, Other Sex Acts Including Water Sports"

Jennifer Garner dating local pastor.

Joan Crawford Was A Man. Garland A Talentless Addict

Science discovers inverse correlation between brain size and penis size

"Sen. Ted Cruz Comes Out as Genderfluid"

The secret ingredient in KFC’s original recipe revealed: it was Colonel Sanders’ cum!

Mike Pence leaves Mother for Senatrice Miss Lindsey.

Christina Crawford declares on her death bed, “I lied. She was a wonderful mother.”

The Kardashian/Jenner woman date white men. Kim leaving Kanye for Josh Groban.

LARRY IS REAL! Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson are married!

Julie Andrews’ vocal surgery “accident” was just a coverup for a sex change operation

Macron says he's leaving wife to be in a thruple with Justin Trudeau and wife. Claims both he and Trudeau are bisexual.

Noodles, while eating Let's Roll Cinnamon Rolls, sharts from his caftan while the sky was so blue outside of Zabar's after being pounded by cagemeat.

Matt Bomer and Simon Halls Currently Living Apart, Both Have Hired Divorce Attorneys

Seth MacFarlane brings [italic]Family Guy[/italic] to a close so he can transition into an elderly Chinese woman.

Dan Savage Admits That Terry Miller "Looks Horrible"

"We haven't f*cked in years."

David Furnish admits Elton John “looks like an overstuffed sofa” and that they only stay married for the sake of their son.

Seth McFarlane Dies During Transition Surgery. Hollywood is Not in Mourning.

David Furnish Confirms That Elton John is "One Nasty Little Bitch"

Meghan Markle and Prince Harry Have Done Something Useful and Worth Talking About

Jon Hamm backs out of multi-million dollar contract to be the next Calvin Klein underwear model when he realizes that he will have to wear the underwear.

Andy Cohen named People magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive.

New study shows how recycled fart gas can help cure cancer

"Gays For Trump" Movement Continues to Gain Momentum

Straight Gals: Studies Show That 89% of Gay Men Have no Interest in Being Your Bestie

I'm a Gay Man Who Isn't Stylish, Witty or Thin and I am Useless When it Comes to Perfectly-Timed Savagely Brilliant Bitchy Comebacks

Billy Dee Williams Only Said he is "Gender Fluid" in Order to Sound Hip, Williams Doesn't Even Know What Gender Fluid Means

Queer Eye cast stops acting silly.

Marla Gibbs: “I Thought He Was Talking About Transmission Fluid”

Karen Pence bombshell: I've been having an affair with Trump, God help me but my pussy gets turned on by a boorish and slovenly fat man!

Meet the Former CIA Agent Who Sold Drugs to Helen Reddy’s Husband

Trans withdrawal all their demands. It was all a lark, they exclaim!

Donald Trump accepted into Mensa International.

Donald Trump accepted into Mensa International.

Barbra Streisand’s Gypsy to Debut Christmas

Gays declare Judy talentless hack!

Ronan Farrow leaves Jon Lovett for Fletcher Previn.