I'm Nick, Bartender and Life Coach.

Nick, can I get a flaming rum punch?

(Played by Sheldon Leonard, the name inspiration for Big Bang Theory. )

"Where do you get off callin' me Nick?"

^ Why Nick, that's yer nayme isn't iht?

Sheldon Leonard had a wonderful accent.

Did you ever fuck Vivian Vance?

^ I WISH.

You're kinda hot, in a douchebag kinda way.

How come you never call me anymore, Nick? A girl could take that personally!

I wondered who it was...I knew who it was in the movie, but not the actor. I thought maybe it was the guy who played Laverne DeFazio’s dad. But I remember Sheldon Leonard. He produced and directed as well as acted I think.

[quote] You're kinda hot, in a douchebag kinda way.

THAT does it!

[motions for the bar goons]

Please, show this gentleman to the door.

We're Bert and Ernie.

We gotta tell you, Nick.

The "pixies" thing.....

It wounds.

Say, werntcha in summutha Capracorn, Nick? And werntcha da only Hebe in Bedford Falls?

Hey Bert and Ernie, sorry you're WOUNDED.

Just keep all your bell ringing behind closed doors and outta my joint.

Hey Swifty Lewis, at least I ain't no garlic eater.

Nick, let me paint that penis with my dingy love sleeve!

I produced

The Danny Thomas Show (1953 - 1964).

The Andy Griffith Show (1960 - 1968).

The Dick Van Dyke Show (1961 - 1966).

Gomer Pyle, USMC (1964 - 1969)

I Spy (1965 - 1968).

"Accidental Family" (1967-1968)

My World and Welcome to It (1969 - 1970)

From a Bird's Eye View (1970 - 1971)

Shirley's World (1971 - 1972)

Fucker was stingy with the crème brûlée, as I recall

Mulled wine, heavy on the cinnamon and light on the cloves. Off with you, me lad, and be lively!

If you try to google anything related to Laverne & Shirley, such as ‘Who played Laverne’s dad?’....all the search results are saturated with Laverne Cox. Phil Foster brings up an actual park & Laverne DeFazio’s dad....more fucking tranny Laverne Cox.

Hey Nick, you still giving wings to angels?

You sound just like a common racetrack tout!

Sheldon never got to see himself immortalized in the character names of the leads in The Big Bang Theory.

It was Nick who showed me how to let my guests know when they should start thinking about leaving, just by giving them some seltzer water.

[qquote] How come you never call me anymore, Nick? A girl could take that personally! —Violet Bix

Whyddya think, Vi?

I heard George Bailey's been giving you money.

Nicky, Nicky, Nicky. Didn't anyone ever tell you that in DL universe, a man wearing a bowtie is automatically considered gay?

Fess up. What's going on between you and George? He looks like he'd be a boring, lousy lay.

Sorry Nick, I need a Shammon

I tell you, I grew up in Pottersville and I ain't never seen that character George in all my life! You got that, or do I have to give you a convincer?

And where do you get off calling me "Nicky?"

I would rather live in Pottersville than Bedford Falls.

Nick do you believe in sweat lodges?

[quote] I would rather live in Pottersville than Bedford Falls.

I hear that. In Bedford Falls, I work for a garlic eater.

In Pottersville, I'm the BOSS.

In Pottersville, I'm a sad lesbian librarian who screams at the sight of men on a public street.

In Bedford Falls, I live in a dumpy house with too many children, no money, and a suicide-prone husband.

Hmmmm.

Nick how much are your services?

The old movie house shows porn in Pottersville, at least.

"The Bells of St. Mary's?" I mean, Jesus Christ.

The mulled wine packs quite a punch, literally.

Nick, old pal....

Your character is so nasty and irredeemable that you don't even show up in the climax at George's house, do you?

Do you?

I mean, even I was invited to George's house for the finale, and got to deliver a good line.

Am I even in the rest of the movie?

Hmm. I was a decorated war hero. George had to stay out because of his bad ear, but he was an air raid warden.

What exactly did you do during the war again, Nick?

I like this thread.

Nick, you need a blow job. Meet me out back.

Nick, when you and George do it, who is the top?

[quote]Your character is so nasty and irredeemable that you don't even show up in the climax at George's house, do you?

Nick never stuck around for MY climax either.

Without George Bailey Ernie would never have been able to buy a house and raise his family, so we’d never have had Dobie Gillis.

Nick, you weren't in that flashback dance scene at the club, were you?

Is that because the club was restricted....?

Oh, never mind. It all worked itself out.

Q: How scary am I?

A: Pretty fucking scary.

[quote] Nick, old pal....Your character is so nasty and irredeemable that you don't even show up in the climax at George's house, do you?

I was holdin' the fort at Martini's bar so he could bring all my tips and the jukebox money over to George's house.

There's two sides to me, you know.

[quote] Nick, you weren't in that flashback dance scene at the club, were you?

Dancin's for dandies and pixies.

Speaking of Life Coaches, anyone know anything about the one on Dr. Phil all the time? Seems like a big ole queen to me.

Poor Nick comes off VERY bad when George goes back after "not being born". The implication is he is a natural asshole had George not come along.

Gosh, Nick, you sure do have muscular arms. You're kind of a big fella generally, aren't ya?

[quote]The implication is he is a natural asshole had George not come along.

That's not as bad as the implication that Ma Bailey was a super bitch who somehow was mellowed by giving birth to George,

Good point, R1, though I think it was intended that she was bitter after losing her child in the ice maybe? Isn't there a line about it? Right time of the year to revisit it.

You're right, though, she is very scary without George.

^ It's not that GEORGE's vibe made them better people, but living in the rough, corrupt suckers' town of Pottersville made them all hard and bitter. In the George universe, Potter is kept at bay and the townspeople remain pure.

I never remained pure, thank god.

Hey Nick, your advice to go after the “pixie” who owed me money for finding his hunting dog was SPOT ON. Now I’m dead over fifty lousy bucks.

Life coach, my ass. Thanks for NOTHING.

I was pure as virgin snow. And then I drifted.

Hee. Thanks, Nick.

Nick, wanna do the Charleston?

George’s mother lost her only child when he drowned. Then her husband had a stroke & died and the Savings & Loan was dissolved by Old Man Potter. Her brother went insane and had to be locked up in the asylum. The only way she could make a living was to take in boarders. She had no family left. Of course she was a broken, bitter woman.

OT - My mother’s best friend in the 1930s/1940s had a father who was a real douche. Her mother owned a dress shop and one day someone came to the shop from the bank. Turns out the father was a degenerate gambler who gambled away every penny the family had. He was co-owner of the dress shop and stopped paying the bills. The mother went home and found the husband had cleared out. They never saw or heard from him again. No doubt he got a new identity somehow, because he knew some people in high & low places and seemed to know he the walls were closing in on him. The mother lost the shop and had to turn their home into a boarding house in order to keep it. She also cleaned the houses of people who had been her customers. My mother’s friend was very angry because her family had been on the same social level as the customers, but when her mother lost her shop and had to clean houses, the former customers treated her mother very badly.

I love you r55. I'd turn pixie for you.

It's not Violet Bix.

It's Violet Bick.

Rhymes with Nick.

Any relation?

[quote] Nick do you believe in sweat lodges?

Angels get their wings in those things, don't they?

[quote] Hey Nick, you still giving wings to angels?

No, I'm slippin'em my left for a convincer!

[quote]You sound just like a common racetrack tout! —Jack Benny

Clip of Nick in his afterlife as The Tout.

Starts at 13:10.

On Sheldon a straw hat works

^ What movie is that from?

To Have and Have Not (1944)

Nick, since you're a Life Coach, do you get up 5 a.m. every day?

[quote] Gosh, Nick, you sure do have muscular arms. You're kind of a big fella generally, aren't ya?

Howd'ya think I got to be the BOSS?

Hey, Nick! It's Tommy from Toledo. We were file clerks together during the war, stationed in San Diego. Remember that drunken night in the barracks when you told me you loved me as you plunged deeply inside me? What happened to us, Nick?

^ Never hoid a ya.

Who told you that polka dots go with plaid?

^Hey, I guess I don't put too much thought into what goes with what. That stuff's for pixies and fraus.

I hadda close my joint cuz a da coronavirus.

But I'm still givin' out wings, pixies!

I'm waiting for the love of my life. Was he in here earlier? Did he leave me a note?

^ [blasted in the face with soda water]

[quote] Nick, can I get a flaming rum punch?

I only serve hard drinks for men who wanna get drunk fast!

Merry COVID-MAS!

Nick's is open for take-out this year.

Bring a brown bag.