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Let's be an Italian/German/American/British co-production 1970s horror film!

I'm shitty dubbing.

by Anonymousreply 188Last Tuesday at 1:25 AM

I am 400 gallons of red food coloring. I look nothing like blood. I'm everywhere.

by Anonymousreply 111/17/2019

I'm Barbara Steele. Gaze upon my limpid beauty, mortals.

by Anonymousreply 211/17/2019

I'm a pair of black gloves covering the hands of the killer. I am seen exclusively through POV shots. I look creepy even when I'm doing mundane things like making a sandwich.

by Anonymousreply 311/17/2019

I'm the avant-garde electronica soundtrack. I am either the best thing or the worst thing about this movie. Sometimes, I am both.

by Anonymousreply 411/17/2019

I'm narrative cohesion.

by Anonymousreply 511/17/2019

I'm a bit of the ultraviolence.

by Anonymousreply 611/17/2019

I'm sideboob. I'm easier to clear with international censors than full frontal.

by Anonymousreply 711/17/2019

I'm Jill Haworth, on the downswing from "Exodus" and protegee of Otto Preminger to "Horror on Snape Island" in just 12 years.

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by Anonymousreply 811/17/2019

I'm the female bit players who were cast because they have big boobs or because they were the director's mistress

by Anonymousreply 911/17/2019

I'm freakish architecture - a collection of opulent apartment houses, schools, palaces, villas, chateaux and skyscrapers that appear to have been designed by an alcoholic tarantula.

by Anonymousreply 1011/17/2019

I am glowing, gauzy light, the chief holdover from the director's previous career as a major 1950s cinematographer.

by Anonymousreply 1111/17/2019

I'm the sheep entrails vomited by the possessed girl.

by Anonymousreply 1211/17/2019

I am the sudden moment where you realize that the until-then perfectly normal person is now a ghoulish zombie.

by Anonymousreply 1311/17/2019

I'm an alcoholic tarantula.

by Anonymousreply 1411/17/2019

I'm a semi-famous American star who is playing the lead in this. My career has faded in the last few years, so now I'm reduced to being badly dubbed in this trash.

by Anonymousreply 1511/17/2019

I am the complete indifference with which news of multiple murder is greeted by every character, no matter who the victims were.

My friends call me Quaaludes.

by Anonymousreply 1611/17/2019

I am chiffon and I am fabulous. Dresses, curtains, nightgowns - you name it, I've done it.

Watch me blow in the wind while the candelabra the heroine is holding in her hand remains lit.

by Anonymousreply 1711/17/2019

I'm Klaus Kinski, chewing up the scenery.

by Anonymousreply 1811/17/2019

I'm the actor playing the villain. I'm relishing a chance to ham it up.

by Anonymousreply 1911/17/2019

I'm the swirling clouds of dry ice.

by Anonymousreply 2011/17/2019

I'm the Rube Goldberg quality of the murders, which grow more and more absurd as the film goes on.

by Anonymousreply 2111/17/2019

I'm one of Jess Franco's 3 dozen pseudonyms; the film is credited to me.

by Anonymousreply 2211/17/2019

I'm Nastassja Kinski's tits 'n fadge. We're only 14, but I'm still going to show them and the director's going to let me!

by Anonymousreply 2311/17/2019

I'm the somewhat respected Americans actors who are appearing in this. We hope this film doesn't get an American release, so no one will know we appeared in this shit.

by Anonymousreply 2411/17/2019

I'm the homosexual character - I'm either a flamboyant gay man or a glamorous lesbian, and may or may not be the murderer.

by Anonymousreply 2511/17/2019

I'm the word salad title.

by Anonymousreply 2611/17/2019

I am an enormous spiral staircase. Perhaps if the woman fleeing the killer runs very rapidly up me she will escape.

by Anonymousreply 2711/17/2019

Voted r16 and r26 for wit and wisdom but I'm loving this whole thread!

by Anonymousreply 2811/17/2019

I am RED.

I am also BLUE.

by Anonymousreply 2911/17/2019

I am an English manor house; a castle or village in a remote part of Germany; Rome; some other Italian city; a Greek island; the Swiss Alps; New York; New England; New Orleans; or, for some reason, Pittsburgh.

I am the preferred location for all these sinister goings-on.

by Anonymousreply 3011/17/2019

I'm the hilariously surreal take on New England. Even when I am filmed at actual New England locations I am somehow completely wrong.

by Anonymousreply 3111/17/2019

I'm the American release title; I'm pretending that the film is the sequel to a big-budget Hollywood film that has got nothing to do with it.

by Anonymousreply 3211/17/2019

I am a bunch of milk cartons with photographs glued to them to provide background shots of New York for "Inferno"

And if I hadn't just identified myself, you'd probably never know I existed.

by Anonymousreply 3311/17/2019

I'm the resolution; I make no sense.

by Anonymousreply 3411/17/2019

I'm Theresa Russell providing the English dub for four of the six characters.

by Anonymousreply 3511/17/2019

I am Marc Porel. Gaze upon my ethereal beauty, mortals.

by Anonymousreply 3611/17/2019

I am an enormous stained glass ceiling or window.

I am bad news.

by Anonymousreply 3711/17/2019

I'm the occasionally highly effective social commentary.

by Anonymousreply 3811/17/2019

I'm the surprising degree to which big budget mainstream Hollywood horror of the early 80s co-opted visual and special effects from these films - The Omen, The Shining, The Exorcist.

by Anonymousreply 3911/17/2019

I, in turn, am the earlier black and white American horror films which inspired these movies - Carnival of Souls, Night of the Living Dead, Psycho.

by Anonymousreply 4011/17/2019

I am Lino Capolicchio. In "House of the Laughing Windows" I have the full-lipped period beauty of a young student in a painting by Renoir.

I run afoul of the creepiest gender reveal party known to humanity.

by Anonymousreply 4111/17/2019

I'm "Don't Look Now", practically a catalog of giallo effects, but I'm directed by Nicholas Roeg, so I get a wide release and critics pay attention to me as if I'm something unique.

Also, I feature Donald Sutherland rolling around naked with Julie Christie, so I have that going for me.

by Anonymousreply 4211/17/2019

I'm a 1972 Oldsmobile. I appear in a European setting and for some reason everyone there seems to think I'm something special.

by Anonymousreply 4311/17/2019

I'm buckets of eye shadow.

by Anonymousreply 4411/17/2019

I am a music box. When opened, I play the most annoying song in the world. Seriously, if you had to listen to me for more than 15 seconds, you'd go crazy and start chopping up C-listers yourself.

My refrain signals the return of the killer, who owned me when they were a small, weird child.

by Anonymousreply 4511/17/2019

I am the sound of footsteps.

by Anonymousreply 4611/17/2019

I am the trailer and title for "Strange Shadows in an Empty Room". I am edited to make me look like a classic horror thriller, with a blind girl (played by Tisa Farrow) stalked through her vast apartment by a possibly supernatural force. I have the tag line: "Because what you can't see...can kill you."

I am terrifying.

Surprise! I'm actually a misleading ad for a shitty police thriller rip-off of "The French Connection", set in Montreal and featuring the world's stupidest car chase.

by Anonymousreply 4711/17/2019

I'm the hippies. I'm here to provide American appeal and an excuse for PG13-style depictions of drug use and orgies. I am also a painless way of upping the body count.

Well - painless for the screenwriter, anyway.

by Anonymousreply 4811/17/2019

I am tits. I am the link to Italian/German/American/British 1970s porno. Watch me bounce saucily across the screen at some unexpected moment that has nothing to do with the story at all.

by Anonymousreply 4911/17/2019

I'm Michael Gough, did someone say "70s British horror film"?

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by Anonymousreply 5011/17/2019

I'm 10-years-before-"Dynasty" Joan Collins; get out of my way Michael, you bitch!

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by Anonymousreply 5111/17/2019

I’m the lips moving out of sync with the dubbed dialogue.

by Anonymousreply 5211/17/2019

Otherwise known as the OP, no?

by Anonymousreply 5311/17/2019

I'm Orson Welles, hoping to borrow the sets at night for my Czechoslovakian/Romanian/Spanish production of "King Lear".

by Anonymousreply 5411/17/2019

I'm the mixture of rubber cement and oatmeal applied the faces of the zombies.

by Anonymousreply 5511/17/2019

I'm the Daughters of something - Darkness, Satan, Dracula, the Devil, Lucifer, etc.

I involve Vampirella-like costuming and bullshit lesbianism.

by Anonymousreply 5611/17/2019

I am Video Archives clerk Quentin Tarentino, observing and taking notes.

by Anonymousreply 5711/17/2019

I am a sudden flash of lightning, used when necessary.

by Anonymousreply 5811/17/2019

I am the apparent indifference with which rich parents receive the news that the private school they sent their children to is being haunted by a sociopathic murderer.

by Anonymousreply 5911/17/2019

I'm the hand that reaches up from the grave in a recurring nightmare.

by Anonymousreply 6011/18/2019

I am the day-for-night technique being used to film during the daytime while the sun is out, but supposedly you're supposed to believe it's nighttime. Everyone notices how shitty this technique is, but it is ubiquitous in the 1970s.

by Anonymousreply 6111/18/2019

I'm Stephanie Beacham trying to run for my life yet also keep my hairpiece from coming loose.

by Anonymousreply 6211/18/2019

I'm the stilettos every woman happens to be wearing when she meets the killer.

by Anonymousreply 6311/18/2019

I'm the dark 'n stormy night climax.

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by Anonymousreply 6411/18/2019

I'm Udo Kier.

by Anonymousreply 6511/18/2019

The barely there eyebrows.

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by Anonymousreply 6611/18/2019

I'm the rapid murder of at least a dozen primary suspects in the last five seconds, usually by each other, until the last character standing, who couldn't possibly have been the killer, is revealed to have been the killer.

by Anonymousreply 6711/18/2019

I am a chimpanzee with a straight razor.

I am not as funny as I sound.

by Anonymousreply 6811/18/2019

I'm a rain of maggots from the ceiling or blown in suddenly through the window or waiting in a pool of rotting corpses at the bottom of a slide.

I am fucking repulsive.

by Anonymousreply 6911/18/2019

I am the murder of a mentally disabled young man with a power drill in "The House by the Cemetery".

I also feature the aforementioned rain of maggots.

by Anonymousreply 7011/18/2019

I'm the lurid red glow of a flaming iron bell right before it presses into the face of yet another young model.

by Anonymousreply 7111/18/2019

I'm the black cat used as a bad omen.

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by Anonymousreply 7211/18/2019

I am the Eyes of Laura Mars. Like Don't Look Now, I am a catalog of these film tropes.

by Anonymousreply 7311/18/2019

I'm one of the best horror film soundtracks ever composed.

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by Anonymousreply 7411/18/2019

I'm Art Deco wallpaper.

by Anonymousreply 7511/18/2019

I'm Vulnavia, Dr. Phibe's fierce-bitch sidekick.

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by Anonymousreply 7611/19/2019

I am the inevitable sequel.

Even by the standards of these things I suck.

by Anonymousreply 7712/09/2019

I am the edgy remake made with a talented cast, a full professional budget and a director/screenwriter determined to pry all my socially meaningful content out of every single scene.

Somehow I suck even worse than the sequel.

by Anonymousreply 7812/09/2019

I am Jennifer Connelly.

Somehow.

by Anonymousreply 7912/09/2019

I'm the 🔥candelabra held by the doomed supporting actress walking down the creaky staircase.

by Anonymousreply 8012/09/2019

I am Def Leppard's video for "Photograph".

by Anonymousreply 8112/09/2019

I'm Ingrid Pitt who starred in half of these productions and showed my tits.

(Ingrid was one of the greats by the way)

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by Anonymousreply 8212/09/2019

I'm Pamela Franklin. One of my eyeglass lenses is cracked to show how serious this is.

by Anonymousreply 8312/09/2019

[R82] Based on your account of her I should say Miss Pitt was at the very least two of the greats.

by Anonymousreply 8412/09/2019

I'm Jaimie Lee, the nanny. I'm also a Halloween reference. I disappear halfway through the film with no logical explanation.

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by Anonymousreply 8512/09/2019

I am milky eyeballs with no visible pupil.

I am here to show that the effluent has just hit the spinny-thing.

by Anonymousreply 8612/09/2019

I am the second lead. I am Mia Farrow 's younger sister. I will steal my sister' s thunder and be THE star of the family. Wait and see.

by Anonymousreply 8712/09/2019

I am a close-up of black leather gloves accomplishing evil things.

by Anonymousreply 8812/10/2019

I am the Perm everyone is rocking

by Anonymousreply 8912/11/2019

I'm a thick, white cable-knit Greek fisherman's sweater.

by Anonymousreply 9012/11/2019

I'm a two-time Oscar-winning actress doing this the same year I play the villain a children's musical back in the United States. A girl's gotta eat!

by Anonymousreply 9112/11/2019

I am the ominous laughter that echo's around the vaulted basement.

by Anonymousreply 9212/11/2019

I'm the rarely seen pre-European censorship cut that includes more gore and boobage but does nothing to make the plot any more coherent. I'll be getting a restored 4k scan along with two audio commentaries and interviews of everyone still alive who hasn't totally disowned it for a Blu-ray release next year by some no-name distributor that's probably a front for a chain of weed dispensaries.

by Anonymousreply 9312/11/2019

I'm the seven year old child presented as a sexually desirable woman. Polanski regularly plays this scene thinking it is high art.

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by Anonymousreply 9412/11/2019

I am second-tier DL fave John Moulder-Brown.

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by Anonymousreply 9512/11/2019

I'm Ennio Morricone. My soundtracks are the best part of most of these films.

by Anonymousreply 9612/11/2019

John Moulder Brown was hot

by Anonymousreply 9712/11/2019

I’m the painstaking closeups of blades slicing into flesh, complete with spurting “blood” that looks like bridge red nail polish

by Anonymousreply 9812/11/2019

I am the shitty remake of said film, starring, of course, Tippi hedren's granddaughter in a part originally played by french star Isobel Adjani. I am a vast waste of time, money and bad acting. Timothee chalamet is not in me, because he is distancing himself from my freakish artsy-fartsy director but Armie Hammer almost made it out of the editing room. Almost.

by Anonymousreply 9912/11/2019

I'm the little homosexual boy Faye Dunaway would torture had I been born earlier enough to try to put a wig on Laura Mars.

by Anonymousreply 10012/11/2019

I'm the overwrought organ player.

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by Anonymousreply 10112/12/2019

I'm the screaming blonde.

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by Anonymousreply 10212/12/2019

Op can call therm horror, but we know they are really just gothic nudies.

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by Anonymousreply 10312/12/2019

I'm all the tropes rolled into one Edgar Wright faux trailer, "Don't".

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by Anonymousreply 10412/12/2019

I'm the eyeball gouging shown in close-up.

by Anonymousreply 10512/13/2019

Howdy do! HIC. It's me again, the alcoholic tarantula. I'm here with another tarantula and two shitty puppet tarantulas.

In Fulci's "The Beyond" we tiptoe over the floor of a library and eat some poor bastard who fell off the bookshelf.

While the scene is initially creepy it soon becomes risible. For one thing there's supposed to be dozens of us and it's pretty rapidly obvious that there's just me, the other one and the two shitty puppets.

It does not help that we all squeak like mice.

by Anonymousreply 10612/13/2019

R94 So does Woody Allen.

by Anonymousreply 10712/13/2019

I'm The Vampire Lovers (1970)

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by Anonymousreply 10812/13/2019

I'm The Music Lovers, which is scarcely less luridly Gothic and hard to believe.

by Anonymousreply 10912/13/2019

R109 My film was NOT a Euro-Trash co-production. It was fully funded by United Artistes which was an American Company!

by Anonymousreply 11012/13/2019

I'm the bad grammar in the hospital in THE BEYOND.

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by Anonymousreply 11112/13/2019

I'm the cohesive story line, uh wait.

by Anonymousreply 11212/14/2019

I'm Solange.

What have you done to me?

by Anonymousreply 11312/14/2019

I'm strange drops of blood. What am I doing on Jennifer's body? The world may never know.

by Anonymousreply 11412/14/2019

I'm a duckling. Don't torture me!

by Anonymousreply 11502/13/2020

i am the creepy abandoned house with architecture inspired by Gaudi, where people inexplicably roam in the middle of the night to peel the wallpaper and writhe orgasmically atop trash lying around on the floor.

i am also the impossibly huge and beautifully appointed apartment inhabited by a poor student who can't even afford a car. in Rome, no less.

by Anonymousreply 11602/13/2020

I'm the breasts. I'm frequently seen overflowing flimsy nightgowns.

by Anonymousreply 11702/13/2020

I’m divorcee Carroll Baker, blackballed by Hollywood but with two kids to feed, grateful for the work. And a dinner roll.

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by Anonymousreply 11802/13/2020

I’m divorcee Carroll Baker, blackballed by Hollywood but with two kids to feed, grateful for the work. And a dinner roll.

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by Anonymousreply 11902/13/2020

I'm a black cat. I will hiss dramatically at you.

Oh yes.

by Anonymousreply 12002/13/2020

I'm 1960s hairdo in a gothic horror film set in the dark ages.

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by Anonymousreply 12102/13/2020

I am interior decor by Yog Soth-oth.

by Anonymousreply 12202/13/2020

I'm the babysitter.

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by Anonymousreply 12302/14/2020

I'm 70's Jodie Foster in a bad wig with creepy Martin Sheen.

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by Anonymousreply 12402/14/2020

I'm the necklace that decapitates people via elevator.

by Anonymousreply 12502/14/2020

I'm a rare bird from Siberia

by Anonymousreply 12602/14/2020

I'm the international cast, reciting my lines in my own language, while everyone else does the same so that no one knows what each other is really saying and how to properly react to what's happening.

by Anonymousreply 12704/06/2020

I'm a Communist country and outraged that I am not in on the co-production. Why my fashion sense alone is de rigor, not to mention our fabulous brutalist shooting locations. The closest you'll get is some shabby Western German absence of style. Sad! Needless to say, your film is degenerate.

by Anonymousreply 12804/06/2020

I am Les nuits des étoiles filantes, aka Christina, princesse de l'érotisme, aka Une vierge chez les morts-vivants. I don't really know what the fuck I'm meant to be. I know! Let's re-release me with random zombie footage from another film, just to confuse things.

by Anonymousreply 12904/06/2020

I'm the random and nonsensical lesbian scene.

by Anonymousreply 13004/06/2020

I am the difficult-for-the-time two-and-a half minute tracking shot from Tenebre, referred to as "meaninglessly brilliant" by critics. I manage to invoke as many of the tropes already mentioned as I possibly can: boobs, lesbians, bright red blood, a black gloved assassin, a straight razor, and a killer soundtrack.

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by Anonymousreply 13104/09/2020

I'm the bad cinematography.

by Anonymousreply 13204/09/2020

I'm the obscurity.

by Anonymousreply 13304/09/2020

I'm a lanky, buttless and cute European actor.

by Anonymousreply 13404/09/2020

I am Donald Pleasance.

Don't hate me because I'm beautiful.

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by Anonymousreply 13504/09/2020

I'm the character that appears early in the film and appears to be important, only to vanish with no explanation half way through with absolutely no effect on the plot.

by Anonymousreply 13604/10/2020

I'm... this.

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by Anonymousreply 13704/15/2020

I’m the female that shows up unexpectedly at the worst possible moment, even though I was specifically told to stay right where I was at.

I’ll prove to be an extreme burden to they guy I love who was trying to save us all.

by Anonymousreply 13804/15/2020

I'm the wonderful setpiece that opens The Bird with the Crystal Plumage, which still stands up today. Many films will have such setpieces which help these movies stay enjoyable even when the plot makes zero sense.

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by Anonymousreply 13912/03/2020

I'm a Warhol Superstar and I have a supporting part. Everybody names drop my participation, on the very very very rare occasion someone ever mentions this movie in the years to come.

by Anonymousreply 14012/03/2020

I'm Joe Dallesandro`s armpits, begging to be licked. I get what what I want.

by Anonymousreply 14112/03/2020

I'm the final technicolor dye-transfer printer left in Rome, used by Dario Argento to really make the colours of Suspiria pop.

by Anonymousreply 14212/03/2020

I'm the smooth line used by the protagonist on the female character in The Cat o' Nine Tails: "Do you know how many people right now are making love at this very second?"

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by Anonymousreply 14312/05/2020

I'm the dearly departed Pamela Tiffin

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by Anonymousreply 14412/05/2020

I'm Angie Dickinson in Dressed to Kill, realizing halfway through the elevator scene that this is in fact more an American giallo rather than a standard Hitchcock rip-off.

by Anonymousreply 14512/05/2020

I'm the enormous roulette wheel the Director spins to write the plot.

"Ok...next scene...so the...lesbian vampires...seduce the...sexual sociopath...in the Expressionist...train station...in Milan."

by Anonymousreply 14612/05/2020

^Sorry to interrrupt the game, but there is actually a tongue-in-cheek Do It Yourself Giallo Generator online. I pressed it just then and got:

My Heart is an Empty Tomb, and Your Name is Engraved Upon the Stone

Directed by Stefano Stefani

A surgeon is butchered while wearing a mysterious amulet. An American psychologist inadvertently picks up the one piece of evidence that will solve the the murder; and she discovers that the presumed victim, the surgeon, is in fact a maniacal killer, and is still on the loose!

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by Anonymousreply 14712/05/2020

I'm the succubus and how easily I cause trouble for everyone!

Also I'm unnecessary historical background and useless details.

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by Anonymousreply 14812/05/2020

I might actually be a little bit in love with R146. I at least want to blow him after reading his post.

by Anonymousreply 14912/05/2020

I'm an enormous but crumbling country house, where the poor but sexy bohemians live. They have no obvious source of income, as the hippy heiress in the movie lives in a splendor, and she isn't bankrolling her friends. Apparently there are no property taxes.

by Anonymousreply 15012/05/2020

I'm the sexy scenes where the actors just sort of flail around on top of each other in such a manner that makes penis in vagina insertion seem highly unlikely.

by Anonymousreply 15112/05/2020

I'm a bottle of chianti. I wandered over from the 50s beatnik movie. Whoops.

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by Anonymousreply 15212/05/2020

I'm the J&B Scotch bottle; if the movie's Italian, look closely - I guarantee you I'm in the background of every other shot

by Anonymousreply 15312/05/2020

I'm the jarring usage of feminine nouns in the dialogue. I'm the result of an Italian writer not realizing that gendered nouns aren't widely used in English, and nor did his editress.

by Anonymousreply 15412/05/2020

R140, as luck would have it, we are Mary Woronov, Ondine, Candy Darling, Kristen Steen, Tally Brown, Lewis Love, filmmaker Jack Smith and artist Susan Rothenberg, stumbling around a Gothic Revival mansion in Oyster Bay in "Silent Night, Deadly Night". We have no idea what we're doing here and neither does the screenwriter.

by Anonymousreply 15512/05/2020

Didn't Brian Eno actually have a similar deck of cards that he used in making music, R146? I feel like both David Bowie's "Lodger" and the B52s "Mesopotamia" albums were created utilising this deck of cards.

by Anonymousreply 15612/06/2020

I think that pack of cards has been passed around genre to genre quite a bit over the last 50 years, R156.

by Anonymousreply 15712/07/2020

I'm the sullen cab driver. No matter what the circumstances are, I never answer any question with more than a grunt. On the plus side, the heroine always hails me right before the killer gets her.

by Anonymousreply 15812/07/2020

I'm four flies on gray velvet. You might think "How fucking scary can that be?"

by Anonymousreply 15912/07/2020

I'm the fact that everyone looks drop dead fabulous. Literally.

by Anonymousreply 16012/07/2020

I'm the random girl who gives Sara an evil smile as she explores the library in Inferno. It's out of nowhere but is effectively creepy all the same.

by Anonymousreply 16112/07/2020

R161 I agree! I'm not sure if it's not intended as a lesbian "cruise"? But all of the library patrons seem sinister...

by Anonymousreply 16212/07/2020

I'm the glamorous white rotary telephone on which the killer (disguising his voice, of course - either a whisper, a baby voice, or even "Donald Duck") will harass and torment our leading lady.

by Anonymousreply 16312/07/2020

R162, ooh a cruise! Perhaps it could be? Argento put a lot of LGBT stuff in his films, I'm noticing now I've watched the majority of them. Perhaps she was all a-twitter at Sara wandering the library all wet, in her nearly see-through shirt? ;)

You are right, all the library patrons do seem sinister in that scene.

Oh, and I'm this exchange:

- "Have you ever heard of the Three Sisters?"

- "You mean those black singers?"

by Anonymousreply 16412/07/2020

I'm Elke Sommer

by Anonymousreply 16512/07/2020

I’m wigs.

Short wigs, for some reason.

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by Anonymousreply 16612/07/2020

I'm references to Verdi, Thomas Penson De Quincey, Shakespeare, Plutarch, The Uffizi, Edgar Allen Poe, Non-Objectivist art, the Symbolists and various other highbrow elements to keep the audience from beginning to suspect that this is indeed a grotty piece of exploitationistic shit.

by Anonymousreply 16712/07/2020

I'm Erika Blanc's facial expressions during La Terrificante Notte del Demonio.

(Not to mention the realization that sometimes having no money for effects can work in the productions favor.)

by Anonymousreply 16812/07/2020

I’m the absurdity of it all.

by Anonymousreply 16912/07/2020

Be the prettiest nice girl and the most handsome young man that always turn out to be heroic and survive the attacks of the villain.

by Anonymousreply 17012/08/2020

I'm Peter Cushing and/or Christopher Lee.

by Anonymousreply 17112/08/2020

Je suis les événements de 67.

by Anonymousreply 17212/08/2020

I'm Jesús Franco. Nobody know what I'm on about. I probably don't either.

by Anonymousreply 17312/08/2020

I'm Daria Nicolodi. Dario's films went to shit without my, uh, "assistance."

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by Anonymousreply 17412/08/2020

Vale, Daria. It's funny how there are some people who you don't know but who's death really gets to you.

I'll be Daria's endless screaming over the credits of Tenebrae.

by Anonymousreply 17512/08/2020

I'm Daria's histrionic overacting in every single frame of every single scene.

by Anonymousreply 17612/08/2020

I am Miguel Bosé in Suspiria. Gaze upon my limpid beauty, mortals.

by Anonymousreply 17712/08/2020

I'm Miguel Bosé's alarming plastic surgery. I'm a bottom, just like him.

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by Anonymousreply 17812/08/2020

Whenever I hear his name I'm reminded of the scene where he slowly disappears behind the big white sheet, waving at Susy.

by Anonymousreply 17912/08/2020

We're creepy zombie monks hovering around the Canary Islands, waiting to torture unsuspecting German "waitresses" who are on holiday, after they've spent a good portion of their time scissoring, of course. We plan to fuck them to death.

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by Anonymousreply 18012/09/2020

I'm a bunch of cats being thrown at Daria Nicolodi.

by Anonymousreply 18112/26/2020

I'm Laura Gemser, willing to show my tits and ass for a big paycheck

by Anonymousreply 18212/26/2020

I'm the fangs that look like they came from a novelty shop.

I'm the fanged mouths that are smeared with something red (or orange) that's supposed to be blood. The blood looks like it came from the same novelty shop.

by Anonymousreply 18312/26/2020

I'm Robert Kerman, attempting the transition from porn to "legitimate" film. Sadly, I will fail.

by Anonymousreply 18412/28/2020

I'm Helmut Berger, star of most of these films. Please take me seriously as a "serious actor". Please?

by Anonymousreply 18512/28/2020

I'm the documentary Horror Europa by fellow homosexual Mark Gatiss which is very much well worth seeing, and will probably be enjoyable for many in this thread.

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by Anonymousreply 18612/28/2020

I'm bursting, punctured, or otherwise injured eyeballs.

by Anonymousreply 18701/02/2021

I'm the unconvincing blonde wig worn by Asia Argento's character in The Stendhal Syndrome. None of the other characters ever even question why I'm on her head.

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by Anonymousreply 188Last Tuesday at 1:25 AM
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