Robert Pattinson ridicules Timmy Chalamet’s tinymeat

Pedo thread

Link please, OP.

He's a boy child . Leave him alone.

The King is a terrible movie and Timmy is terrible in it.

Timmy’s a fine actor but the attempts to turn him into an indie sex object are ridiculous. He’s ludicrously unattractive.

R4, I’m watching it now and think it’s pretty good.

What the reviews seem to say is that Timmy is not really ready to be a serious leading man.

It’s hard to look at him and see Henry. He still looks like a little french-american boy.

Pattinson should talk, with his infamous "can't get it up without something up the ass" troubles.

R1 R3 Need to shove a lava lamp in all of their holes.

I'm not going to do a full review but the fact that Dean-Charles Chapman , who has a full on London accent in real life, can convincingly pull off an RP and TC pathetically can't says all one needs to know about this production and him.

The King is a more thought provoking than are majority of those who’ll see it.

R11 Honestly, no one in this movie should be speaking RP as it is anachronistic for the time period.

Pattinson is probably jealous that Timmy has a nice cut cock compared to Rob's elephant trunk.

Team Elio.

r13 If you want time period then no one in the cast could understood as the 15th century was only the beginning of the Great Vowel Shift. The best we can hope for is consistency within Henry's family and peers.

If he thinks I have tinymeat what does he think of Armie’s?

The Battle of Agincourt scene is well done.

Take this, Robert

If Timmy ever shows cock DL will implode.

Timothy literally has a rat-face. He's so ugly. Has he EVER made anyone money?

Why did the director of CMBYN hire Timmy & Armie anyway? They both refused to go full frontal. Why didn't he hire actors who would be willing to show cock?

R21 CMBYN cost about $3.5 million to produce. It's global revenue was around $40 million, so he made a handsome profit for movie's investors.

^^ Its

R22, I think they did go full frontal but edits were made. I’m hoping for a true director’s cut one day.

R25, I thought it was posted here last year that they had no full frontal clauses in their contracts?

R12 you are my hero.

The film really uses silence well. He conveys so much with his eyes, All the suspicio

If he doesn't do any nudity, the gays won't be interested in seeing it.

Please provide a link where Pattison says that Chalamet has a small dick.

Yeah, I asked that way above.

Timothee Chalamet is the Harry Styles of crap movies-- a fug boy marketed as a sex god.

I'm so moist after watching The King. Someone please kindly dry hump me.

And R32 must be the most beautiful creature in the world. Oh please you flabby 360-pound ogre, just shut up.

R30 Get a Netflix subscription, watch the film.

Pattinson, as the dauphin, insults Timothee in the movie, which is quite good.

Remember when DL predicted Pattinson wouldn't have a film career after Twilight?

It's beyond me how anyone finds OP's photo sexy.

I think Chalamet is very sexier. Certainly sexier than Pattinson.

R19 why is Usher wearing sunglasses? At least Miley looked nice.

R1 Chalamet is 23 and there must be a limit to your stupidity

They're both pasty, nelly boys. Ick.

Pattinson always seems like he would have body odor.

I’ve always thought that Timmy would either have a tiny dick or a very long one, but I can’t decide which.

R42 which is why he was a perfect match for KStew.

I liked this film. TC has such a strikingly beautiful face is some shots, the sexual tension was there with Joel Edgerton, etc.

R45 yep The thirst for dude is real. The movie is a soso for me but he is so fuckable in it.

I had Chalamet’s exact body type a few years ago, but thought I needed to “bulk up” to be sexy. Turns out, I was just ahead of my time. Many of my straight girl friends and fellow gay guys think he is pure sex.

Part of his appeal is that he’s so different, physically, from typical leading men. The “big muscle man on steroids” look is becoming passé, I think.

I know this is fake, but I could scrap by until he really presents dong. ooh aaahhh

Chalamet is so woefully miscast, I actually guffawed in the challenge scene where the guy called for the "big dog" to come forward and out prances a chihuahua.

There’s evidence from CMBYN that Chalamet is packing. The King was great. My hole was throbbing. He scared the cum out of me properly several times. Loved the casting.

Timmy is completely sexless. Anybody finding him sexy likely has insecurity issues. He's one step away from dying of anorexia.

He is sex

I would sell my mother to fuck him.

[quote]My hole was throbbing. He scared the cum out of me properly several times.

MARY!

I love his lean body. He looks very European in that way. It's only in America that we think men have to be roided out assholes to looks good.

R55, Right, I'm sure all European warriors were 98-pound emaciated weaklings.

R56 if you've ever seen photos of Henry V, he was an emaciated man. Timmy looks exactly like him. Medieval men weren't roided up.

There's a happy medium in between emaciated and roided up.

I've looked at the portraits, R56. All that exists are some profile portraits, and some stylized not realistic drawings and paintings. He doesn't look like a fragile twink in any of them. He also was scarred from a rather horrific arrow injury he only survived from an innovative surgery.

R59 you can see from his bone structure he was slight. The same with most people during that time who weren't fed on donuts. Mendelsohn, Sam Harris, emaciated was the look of the period.

R60 Sean

R60 People were often shorter in the Middle Ages than nowadays, but it doesn't mean they were all "slight" or emaciated. Especially people in privileged positions, who had access to good food, were either reasonably athletic (not roided up of course) or even overweight most of the time.

Henry V in particular was described as very tall and towering, so he might have been more lanky than your average European warrior, but I'm not sure Timmy is particularly "towering" either.

Not very fair, he hasn't gone through puberty yet.

Aren't they both bottoms?

Seen PHOTOS of Henry V?

Lol. My god.

The King who was tall and athletic when he was young was Edward IV.

That's why 6 foot 2 Max Irons was cast to play him in "The White Queen" a few years ago.

Watching it now. Very slow first half. Exciting second half.

I hate how they use horses for these movies. 😥😥😥😥

I like slow roasted horse meat. Yum. It tastes like venison.

R66 Max Irons is a cutie. I've met him once a few years ago, definitely one of those people, who are more handsome in person.

R70, Max has also been in generous in showing us his butt:

this actually worked for me. His slight stature and femme facade contrasted with those battle scenes which were a combination of MMA fighting, mud wrestling, and a knife fight. Merciless and unemotional slaughter rather than the usual macho bellowing.

We need to start calling him Big Dog.

I watched about the first 15 minutes and found it absolutely excruciating. Had to stop. And I love Chalamet. But this was dreadful.

It was so wonderful having Josh O’Connor running around in his underwear and bathrobe for the first three season, I’ll especially miss that.

Correct r26. Originally there was nudity planned but when Chalamet and Hammer came on board they refused.

Luca tried to lie about it to protect his actors, but and James Ivory called him out.

Yeah, that's what I thought, R76. Maybe they should have hired European actors instead of American ones.

The Euro actors are much more willing to do full frontal.

The first fight scene with Chalamet was obviously stunt guys. That's why they had helmets and visors on for the entire scene. There's no way Chalamet could have lifted that sword. How embarrassing.

Timothee did 2,5 months of training for this scene with this actor he is fighting. This actor (forgot his name) mention it in his interview and on the press tour. Timothee and director mentioned it too. It is him fighting there

[quote]The Battle of Agincourt scene is well done.

You can really, REALLY tell that everyone involved in this film has obsessively studied Game of Thrones and specifically the Battle of the Bastards. Even the lighting, filters and all that were the same.

[quote]Chalamet is so woefully miscast, I actually guffawed in the challenge scene where the guy called for the "big dog" to come forward and out prances a chihuahua.

Chalamet is a good actor but I have to agree. The idea that this skinny little thing who looks like he's going to sprout wings and flit away at any moment is this warrior king and epic leader whose men would march through hell for him requires too great a suspension of disbelief. Go watch Tom Hiddleston in The Hollow Crown. THAT is a credible Hal/Henry.

The King was underwhelming for me, but I don't think Timothee is to blame for that. So many times the camera turns to him and he should have had a line to say to explain his inner struggle or even some much needed humor, but the script doesn't give him one. You can only express so much with facial expressions. His part was underwritten. No one could have made that role compelling as written. However, if you look at how many ecstatic reviews he got from male viewers who had never heard of him before, it seems he's picked up a whole new following, which he'll need for the success of Dune. And now he's demonstrated that he can play a not-so-soft role with fight scenes and do a fairly good British accent. I think this was a good move for him overall. Regardless of the size of his meat, he's very clever, and he's going to be around for many years to come.

r81 it surprised me too. Seems like his performance did not work that well for film twitter folks (not all of them cos there are a lot of critics who praised his work and score still over 70% but still a lot of were cold on him too) BUT there are so many grt reviews from straight dudes from the countries with masculine culture (which is funny to me considering how TC dont give a fuck about it) Like there are so many raves from all these guys saying the variations of "what a grt actor he is" and a few of "he is handsome no homo" And btw Michod is this kinda director, he creates movies that usually do not play well with critics of awards circuit but straight dude love him

Poor little Timotee and his cocklet

R68 many are fake horses. I saw some early still shots.

R82 true, David is the go to man for raw, masculinity. Like the Rover, Animal Kingdom. Now Timmy’s recruited the str8s to want to fuck him too. Smart move.

R81, the boy is packing, who are we kidding. Present Timmy! Time to present!

Are there any ass shots in the movie?

No, I don't believe there are even any tits.

There’s not a lot of “stuff” in the movie in general. I kinda of appreciate the stark feel of the film. But Tim O’Tay’s brooding was bordering on excessive. Like...we get it...he’s conflicted and mildly annoyed.

I've been having a love affair with Nicholas Britell as of late and came across his score for the film, which I think is one of the film's best. Love the rich, full use of strings... very reminiscent of Hans Zimmer and Philip Glass. I've listened to it a number of times and can't get enough of it.

I tried watching the film, however, and I found it to be lacking. I'm a fan of Michod for the most part... I think he manages to contrast the very masculine exterior with some genuine heart. There's a lot of emotion and tenderness in The Rover, for instance. I could sense it a bit here, but honestly his direction is so dull... the tone of the film is so dire, and it's shot in such a straightforward manner that I had a difficult time even getting invested in the world or these characters. I had to stop shortly after the Robert Pattinson scene which was... kind of embarrassing? I don't know if I'll even finish the film. Might just remain content with the score.

The movie picks up after the Rob Pats. Like the fun starts there

Maybe I should stick with it then... because it was trying my patience up to that point.

Some of the reddits reactions:

"Chalamet’s turn in this is making me very excited for Dune next year. He’ll do Paul Atreides justice."

"Me too. This was my first time to see Chalamet and I could totally see Paul in his portrayal in The King"

"Man I know! I have been 100% more excited to see him in Dune after this.

I feel like this movie and Dune will do something for his career similar to Leo in Gangs of New York and the Departed. Going from more of just the pretty boy hearth throb actor to someone more able to do a grittier role."

"The main reason I put this movie on was because I wanted to see Chalamet’s chops prior to Dune, because pretty much every other production decision I’ve heard for it so far is very encouraging. His was the first “battle-speech” I’ve seen in a while that wasn’t simply tedious. You got a sense of fear, and rage, and he was screaming it at a volume where the actual number of men in his army could conceivably hear it (rather than doing an Aragorn, speaking to the first 25 of like 10000 men)."

I was thinking it's probably closer to his Man in the Iron Mask.

interesting if TC will change his wordrobe during Dune promotion. Hardly Dune fanboys will understand flowery suits, pink sweatshirts and makeup

The Dune fanboys will see the film regardless. The truth of the matter is that, besides the novel itself, Denis Villeneuve is the draw. He's got that 18-35 straight white male demographic in the palm of his hands. He, more than any of the cast members, is the reason people have so much hope for the adaptation.

[quote]"Chalamet’s turn in this is making me very excited for Dune next year. He’ll do Paul Atreides justice."

Girl, please. Chalamet is no Paul Atreides.

from the same thread on reddit about the accent (you can go there if interested in what this dudes think about the movie in general)

"Funny everyone keeps mentioning Timothee’s accent when in all reality it was actually very spot on for the time period. The English accent we know today wasn’t adopted in England until the late 18th century. Which is the same reason we as Americans don’t have a “british” sounding accent and parts of Canada, South Africa, and Australia do. They were colonized much later after the non-rhotic accent we know today was adopted. Non-rhotic meaning no hard “R” sounds. “Caah” & “Faah” instead of car & far."

"As an Englishman, his English accent is one of the most authentic sounding I've heard from an American actor. If you had told me he was British I would have believed you."

"I was very surprised to hear he's American. I'm glad I didn't know as I would've been listening really closely to any mistakes but it was amazing."

"There's lots of West-Country English accents (gloucestershire etc) going on since Henry was born in the Welsh Marches so it makes sense.

Not sure what you mean about Henry not sounding English. Sounded good to my English ears."

R97 btw love old movie it is so stylish and Kyle is so hot. but a lil bit tooo not serious for me. Hope this one will be more Blade Runner like

ok the last one i promise. from the same reddit thread about the king

"I’m a straight male, but I think he’s hot as fuck."

TC keeps winning

TC is just a little skinny spaz who's in love with Harry Styles

^^^ Oh, please, please, let us not delve into such fanfic meanderings! The frau will come. What will we do then?

R99, and you believed it? LOL

R95 I think TC can do plain t-shirts and jeans or sweatshirts. He did that through his 'Beautiful Boy' press junket. Although I think AH blew his cover with that gushing eulogy in Variety.

Too much gushing here. Where is the pointless bitching?

Big Dog, Big Dick

Sean Johansen from the porn site Straight Naked Thugs resembles Timmy Chalamet quite a bit to me. You can find videos of him on pornhub and other porn sites under his name or do a goggle search.

R106 = Sean Johansen's agent

You thing the thugs on Straight Naked Thugs have agents?

Timothée will wear whatever the hell he wants on the press junket for Dune. Momoa will be dressed in pink suits with matching scrunchies giving the "straight white males" everything they ever dreamed of. They can't wait to drool over Timmy's cute twinky ass in a no homo way, of course. Look how quickly they've jumped on board. He's like a Luke Skywalker. Lithe and pretty. They can't wait.

Sorry R108, I meant, their pimps

bump

Timmy

The whole film is a total catastrophe!

Historic inaccuracies, shitty accents.

But Timothée is cute.

Timmy and Styles need to star together in a film as a gay couple.