Ever known someone personally who ended it?

I know of six, two of which were unsuccessful attempts.

R1 - six is a lot!

My friend's partner committed suicide. He had a lot of problems and had abused my friend for years. Shot himself in the head with a shotgun. My friend found the body.

My dad was a cop. His partner committed suicide one night, after a family dinner. Got up from the table, walked out into the backyard, and put his gun in his mouth. I was a kid, but I remember my dad getting that phone call. I remember my mother crying in the kitchen.

Good friend, gor caught with lots of drugs with intent. Day of sentencing there was a lunch recess. Friend and lawyer walking up courthouse stairs. Friend pulled out gun and shot himself.

gor=got

My very first date when I was 14 and he was 16 took me to a Yes concert. He was super nice, a talented pianist and I guess troubled. Two weeks later he was dead.

My uncle committed suicide when I was six. He contracted tuberculosis while fighting in Guam during WWII. He was in and out of a sanitarium until he died. He also struggled with alcoholism.

It was my first encounter with death.

Four that I can remember.

Two cousins, both hung themselves from trees in the yard.

Two co-workers, one male and one female.

The male got heavily into drugs, and ended up shooting himself.

The female found out her husband was cheating on her, so she hung herself.

My father drowned himself. He was 59 y/o, alcoholic, divorced, jobless, and living with this mother. So it worked out very well for him.

My brother did it. He'd been sick with some kind of mystery illness; he had no job and no health insurance. He'd had bronchitis and the doctors he was seeing were giving him bullshit; he was in pain and they said things like maybe you cracked a rib from all the coughing, maybe you're just one of those people who's slower to heal from illness. After his death it was revealed he had renal cell carcinoma on one of his kidneys. Anyway, he was in pain and was getting no help for it and he thought he had terminal cancer (he thought it was lung cancer). He'd also had an extremely abusive childhood that had warped his thinking; all his life it was instilled in him to not try to do anything, just give up. So I guess he thought "I'm in pain, I have a terminal illness (his illness hadn't even been diagnosed), and rather than suffer though cancer treatment I'll just end it now. I'll be doing myself and everybody else a favor." He shot himself in the head. He was only 45. He was well liked by everyone. But he wouldn't do a thing to help himself. He just gave up, like he was taught to do by the people who had abused him as a child.

Yes, two. A Second cousin and a former friend/partner. I'd not been in contact with either in a while.

But it was such a shame, they were both troubled, but still seemed do hopeful.

Then they stopped contact, then I found out they'd died. I imagine the pain, and loneliness just consumed them.

No, but I know a lot of suicidal people.

I can think of three off the top of my head:

Cousin of a college friend who I'd met several times. He was a drug dealer or runner or something and shot and killed two people. Went into hiding and shot himself when the police were closing in.

30 year old boyfriend of a female friend who during during the '08 recession couldn't find a job, so he enlisted in the army (he was from a military family). Was sent to Korea after boot camp and hung himself in a closet there. He'd been failing at the army fitness tests and whatnot. Nice guy. What a waste.

Co-worker who had to leave do to a degenerative condition that put him in a wheelchair. His condition was getting worse and wouldn't get better, so he ended his life.

R9 Pictures are hung, people are hanged.

Wow so many stories here already. I remember a friend of my parents back in the 80s. He had gotten extremely buried in debt and was trying to hide it from his family. Still trying to live the highlife, he borrowed money from the wrong people and the recession hit. He shot hinself with his 9 mm pistol in his office late one night after finishing half a bottle of scotch. My parents told me he had dies from a heart condition. I later found out from his daughter what had really happened. His daughter, the wife and the other son had to move into an apartment and started over from scratch.

*Ahem*

Three I can think of.

BIL’s brother. Severely depressed. His wife was very demanding. He couldn’t take it and shot himself.

A woman whose kids I used to babysit. She had Lupus. Her husband was having an affair. She walked down to the river and drowned herself. Her body wasn’t found for 8 months.

My high school best friend’s mother. She was bipolar. Shot herself the day after grad ceremonies.

Three uncles, one aunt and two cousins. Lead poisoning runs in the family.

Great article about the popular methods

A friend I used to perform with committed suicide. He always made me laugh when he would go on these hilarious rants and I would play his 'straight man'. I didn't know him as well as I thought I did though. After I gave up performing comedy and moved away, I heard his anger became something legendary and he turned to drugs and drinking full time. I only found out a few months later since I don't have a Facebook profile. It really is the worst thing when someone takes their life, it leaves a big hole and sometimes all I can think about is if I could have said something, done something. He left a newborn son that will never know him as well. I guess he didn't see any other way out of his mental cage.

I’m so curious about what’s happens to a soul that commits suicide (if you believe that we go on after our physical body dies.)

I can't imagine that you'd be punished the way that religious texts say, R22. What kind of god would punish someone who was suffering so much that they had to end it?

A kid in high school. He was bullied a lot.

I would also like to know if anyone discovered the slain body? Did you scream, run, or were fascinated?

I've never known anyone who did it, but I tried to do it five years ago.

My aunt did it before I was born, but apparently my mom walked in on one of her attempts where she was spraying Raid down her throat.

R22

As I understand it, you have to come back again and live essentially the same life to learn the lesson that you bailed on the previous encounter.

NYC, 1980s, AIDS. A number of friends and acquaintances killed themselves.

R26 - are you glad now that you were unsuccessful in committing suicide?

Three: a cop (by gun - depression); a famous surgeon (by gun - after a cancer diagnosis), and a college roommate (threw himself out of a third story window, landed on a stockade fence, got off the fence somehow and crawled up three flights of stairs and then found the apartment door locked - because he'd been paranoid all day and had previously locked himself in before throwing himself out - and died in hospital from his injuries three days later.)

It almost sounds like R3 is describing my brother who shot himself with a shotgun, R3 doesn't use pronouns but partner instead, so not sure of the sexes involved their account, but my brother's wife found him, they were going through a divorce. He didn't leave a note but he had always lead a troubled life, had a hard time holding down a job and was probably despondent about having to pay child support for two small children for close to the next two decades.

His wife blames herself for it happening, but none of my family blamed her. The two children were provided with Social Security benefits until they turned 18, better than my brother would probably have been able to provide for them. Of course they felt cheated by not having a father and had to deal with a series of boyfriends that my sister-in-law ran through over time.

As my only sibling I had mixed feelings about the suicide, he had always been a huge pain in my ass and we weren't close. His being gone made dealing with my parents eventual deaths drama free. If he had still been alive that wouldn't have been the case, even though my parents left next to nothing financially when they died. Not complaining, never expected anything from them, but I wish they had more to live on while they were alive.

R30 For almost the whole five years, I have been happy that I was unsuccessful. My lowest period since then is now, actually.

R33 - I’m sorry. You sound like a sweet, sensitive person. As someone who had a gun pointed at myself, hang in there - it gets better. Wish you the best 😘

To R33 and really everyone, unless you have a terminal illness, suicide has been described as a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Yeah that is rather corny but also true. Everyone has ups and downs but I have eventually gotten out of the down times, sometimes it has taken a few years but I am very glad to be here today.

A long-time neighbor to did, intentional overdose on Rx meds. I was angry that my father is the one who had to find her; I think it rattled him quite a bit, although he didn't talk much about it.

She left a vindictive note for her out-of-town daughter. Her daughter tossed the note, sold the entire contents of the house to a re-sale dealer, and sold the house not long after.

Apparently a LOT was going on with that family that I did not detect while I was growing up.

My former boss killed himself. He was a terrible person. Think of the worst shouting match you've ever had with anyone. He liked to have those kind of arguments 5 times a day. I'm not exaggerating. That's just how he was. It was normal to him. He was actually punched by 3 employees in a period of 2 years. One of them was a woman. He was a warped mother fucker. He took joy in threatening people's jobs. I'm talking about people who have a few kids and were only earning $10 an hour. He told a female coworker who was leaving her abusive husband that she was pathetic because she was going to have to get a roommate. He told her, "A roommate? at your age (45) you should be way ahead, but instead you are going back to someone who is the equivalent of an 18 year old"

We found out when we went into work one morning. About 4 people laughed. Many people had smiles on their faces. A few were shocked, but NO ONE was sad. And we found out he had been living with his mom (he was 55). He blew his head off and she had to find him. Talk about fucking pathetic. I went home that day and checked those information websites and found out his ex-wife's name and her mother's name and checked out their facebook pages. The mother in law said she was so relieved that she would finally have a decent night's sleep for the first time in 10 years and she didn't have to worry about her daughter's and grandchildren's safety. I'm still shocked he didn't kill his ex wife and children.

R34 Thank you very much 😊

R35 Thanks for your advice, also. You know whereof you speak, evidently. It's just so hard when one's problems seem to come from persistent personality traits. Anyway, I'm still here!

A well off college-aged cousin of mine killed herself in her senior year. She was a superstar student athlete, obviously pushed by her parents. I was very shocked when she killed herself, and it still shocks me a bit to this very day, because she and her family were always "the perfect" family in my mind.

Meet a few. First one, when I was young, was an uncle, really nice man but with demons and completely alcoholic. He poisoned himself with rat poison. The most recent one, this year, was a friend from art school and it was the most horrible thing I ever heard of: he self-decapited, meaning he created a strange mechanism, with ropes and heavyweights rocks and separated his head from his body in an isolated abandoned mine. This guy was super good-looking, very calm and generous and it was a terrible shock for all of us. Mental health is a serious issue.

Bisexuals do get to choose between men and women. Gays and lesbians are stuck with same sex partners, or lies.

I can’t imagine having your current partner or husband killing themselves. What an awful blow to have to live with. Even though it’s not your fault, you would feel some responsibility.

Next door neighbor. Middle class, white picket fence kind of family. The man worked a professional career job and the mom had a part-time hobby job that coordinated with her three kids' school schedule. The dad sometimes traveled for work. One weekend he came home and told his wife he was filing for divorce and leaving her for his mistress. His wife responded by overdosing on pills a week later. The pills worked.

yes a cousin..........I think he finally figured out he was gay at 36 and came from a born again right wing wing nut family and his mother was a first class bitch. His marriage was on the rocks (I think because of lousy or no sex life ) and instead of dealing with his problems he blew his brains out. No one else in his family or his life Im sure ever figured out this possiblity as the reason if that is what it was.

My youngest sister. I will never get over it. She was seemingly happily married with a loving husband and two young daughters. I had no idea that she suffered from postpartum depression since the birth of her firstborn until one of my other sisters told me much, much later, that she had been hospitalized with severe depression. It's an awful, terrible thing to lose someone whom you perceived as happy with a loving family.

It's humbling to consider how little we know about people's inner lives. No matter how well off they seem.

Mental health is worth fighting for, and it is almost impossible to describe the horrors of mental illness to someone who has not experienced its full power. When in its grip, throw EVERYTHING people have ever used to combat it---antidepressants, sedatives, painting, writing, join a cult, chant, become born again, travel, volunteer, run for government, change jobs, go off the grid, gorge on chocolate, cosmetic surgery, leave a relationship, pay a hot young guy for sex, move, declutter, start a collection, sleep sleep sleep, marathon movie watching----ANY of these things. Keep cycling around whatever lifts your mood and stops the dread and anxiety even temporarily. Because mental illness can stop and mental health can creep back in. Give it time. Give it room to grow. Whatever it takes.

A friend in high school... her mom jumped in a quarry. Looking back she always had the drapes closed and lived in literal darkness.

My mother, aged 93. Took a deliberate overdose of her heart medication. Made sure I'd find her after driving 7 hours to her house.

It all comes out in the wash, [R22].

I’ve known a couple people who have, but I can’t say I was close. A classmate in high school and then one of the owners of a company I worked for. Both were traumatic in their own way, even though I wasn’t personally involved with either.

I am close to someone who I am quite certain will, and I can even tell you when (not date/time....just checking off boxes on life events and getting affairs in order). I’ve tried to help, they are finally in counseling, but I think life’s just been too much and they don’t feel they have anything to look forward to. It breaks my heart and I’m dreading the day.... I pray, as at this point I don’t know what else I can do. I don’t feel at all guilty, but I do get mad at how life does seem to single some out for the shit sandwich. Sometimes I get mad at this person, too. It sucks.

No But I tried and failed(obviously) ten times

Too many to count (It's painful to remember): a longtime friend of my parents, who I knew my entire life, one day got in her car and put the hose in. She had carefully hidden her deep depression from everyone except her husband, who had been frantically trying to get her help.

My aunt, who had to nurse her mother with Alzheimer's for at least 20 years before her mother died. My aunt had a test and found out she had it too. She rigged up a shotgun and shot herself to save her daughter from all that. Her daughter became so depressed that she became a raging alcoholic. She was so ill that the doctor told her one more drink and she would be dead. She made it 6 months, but the holidays did her in and she had that one drink (straight vodka) late one night.

A man who was having a hard time financially and personally for a number of years. He hanged himself.

There are a few who took too many drugs (they were called overdoses but I have always thought they were intentional because their lives were in a sad state of affairs and/or their backs were against the wall). Very sad. There's more, but I don't feel like writing about them.

I knew someone who did a "death by cop" suicide.

Yeah, my ex-boyfriend. I had ended all contact with him after he told me he had cheated on me. It turned out he had borderline personality disorder and wanted a caretaker. I was done. He was in a rehab facility but got kicked out because he was using. He checked into a motel and they found him dead a few days later from an overdose.

He had tried to kill himself by swallowing all his pills earlier and told me he wanted to kill himself. I helped him out so much by making sure he was getting the proper mental healthcare. He had been in 3 different facilities and was in jail 3 times as well. He just wanted to end it and no one could convince him otherwise.

I knew 4 who did. One was a nearby neighbor and 3 others were classmates. Two of the classmates were brothers. All did it before the age of 30.

Thought about it many times over the years, but could never do it.

In the early 80s a great looking football star in H.S. Who had a cheerleader pretty Girlfriend said he was so excited to find out about the afterlife did in my area. It was odd as he wasn’t troubled.

My ex first boyfriend did at 50 ..he had a heart attack on his 50thbirthday and was getting hit shortly after that with divorce papers. His mom and foster parents were terribly abusive to him.

My best friend from law school. Everybody said it was accidental overdose, but I believe he wanted to die. He overdosed on Christmas Eve and was put on a 72-hour hold. We went out to a bar on New Years Eve and he was acting weird. all night. I heard him on the phone talking to his dealer, and he left the bar, saying he would be back in 30 minutes. He never came back and wasn't answering texts. I assumed he went home to get high, but wasn't worried. I went by his house the next morning and found him on his living room floor. At first I thought he was just passed out, so I kicked him on the butt and told him to get up, but he didn't move. Got down on the floor and tried shaking him, then called 911. Found out at the funeral that his father, who had been paying his rent/bills, was cutting him off. I did blame myself for not checking on him that night and not noticing that he was down and taking him out for drinks, but he had always had weird mood swings and I never really worried about his drug use. So, maybe it was suicide, or maybe accidental because he had been clean for a week and his tolerance was lowered.

A friend of mine committed suicide when she was a teenager. We weren't extremely close; she was more a friend of a friend, but I did feel vaguely guilty that I wasn't able to help. I also saw a little bit of myself in her, because I also was a very shy, insecure teenager who had contemplated suicide during the worst part of my teens.

My ex partner, and really good friend, went through this. His mom was a nurse and one day walked off the window sill of a 30 story building.

I have to admit I find suicide fascinating. On one hand, I get it. On the other, I really, really don't

Just remembered a fourth person. He was the son of my parents’ friends. He was handsome, smart and athletic. He had a great job. He’d also suffered from depression since his teens. He jumped off a bridge landing into the water 156 feet below.

^He was 27.

Too many. All sorts of reasons too. Grief over a deceased spouse (2), very old and afraid of declining health (1), raped whilst in prison (1) - this was very sad he was a young guy, got hooked on drugs, committed petty crime to fed his habit and ended up in prison. He was very good looking and a really nice guy. That was back in the 1980s. Health issues (2), depression (1). There are also some others that I never knew the reason.

Suicide is on the rise significantly with young people.

My father, my husband, my nephew.

When I came out at age 17, my father was so ashamed and embarrassed he tried to kill himself. We lived in a rural, Christian, ultra right wing conservative area. He took a kitchen knife and went to the backyard and slit his throat. He had not severed the jugular and knew it as he was still alive. I found him about to have another go with the knife. He was in shock and the muscles in his hand had fused around the knife. I wrestled him to the ground. It took all my strength the prize the knife from his grip. He lived. He's still alive. We never talk about it. Don't ask how it affected me. I ended up in a psychiatric ward having ECT (shock therapy) at 18, and it took years and years to repair my broken mind. I'm 33 and fine now and I rarely tell people what happened. Not many people can fathom the circumstances or get their head around it.

^🙏🏻🌤💜

To all of you ❤️

[R66] My dear, love to you.

I’ve known many over the years. One my best friend, who had always been depressed and who overdosed on a combination of drugs. I still think about it everyday. Another of my close friends died the same way because she didn’t have health insurance and was tired of the stress of seeking medical care she couldn’t afford. There have been eight others I can count, including my neighbor and several classmates. In my experience, it’s the number one cause of death for people under fifty.

Wow I’m overwhelmed by all of the honest responses. It’s apparent that suicide affects the gay community perhaps significantly more than the straight one.

Almost every gay man I know, has or has had severe depression, including myself. It's easy to say things are getting better but I know too many young guys who have clinical depression or have anxiety or both, and for the majority of them it is a direct link to their sexuality and/or how people have treated them because of their sexuality. Only a few of those young men have gotten professional medical treatment for their depression, the majority of them have thrown themselves into drugs or alcohol or sex, or a dangerous combination of all three. I know a beautiful, stunningly gorgeous and intelligent young man who is so ashamed of his sexuality he can't look people in the eye when he talks to them. He told me he hates himself and I don't doubt that he does.

I never understood it until my partner went into a severe depression and was seriously considering it. Had to be committed. I totally didn’t understand it at the time. He is super happy 99% of the time and I always thought of him as genetically impervious to unhappiness - as opposed to me who has low level constant depression (dysthymia). But when he had a breakdown, it was severe, extreme and he had no idea how to handle it. Took lots of meds and therapy to get back to safety 6 months later.

Since then, I’ve looked at my low level depression as kind of a blessing - I’ve learned how to deal with bad things and have never experienced such severe depression as to want to kill myself. But I understand how suicide happens now and that brain chemistry has a lot to do with it. My partners aunt had also committed suicide and his mother had periods of sever depression.

r72 Nice to hear someone acknowledge they didn't understand suicide but now do after experiencing it somewhat firsthand. I'm glad your partner is well. So many people are judgmental of others who suffer from depression/mental illness, or have breakdowns. As you've illustrated, it can happen to any of us and it's usually those who've never experienced depression who suffer the worst when it does happen as they've no coping mechanisms to fall back on.

Get through your motherfucking 20s and you'll find your 30s better. Get through your striving 30s and you'll find your 40s better. Get through to your clarifying 40s and you'll start feeling gratitude for still being alive. By 50, you'll start thinking, "It'll be over soon enough, I'm curious to see what happens next." And you'll also find yourself being happy, without trying. In other words, give in to it. Go with the flow. But nothing's worse than your 20s. All this pre-supposes you're not abusing drugs or alcohol. They're the joker in the deck and you can't count on anything normalizing till you kick them.

I think that isn’t always the case R74. In fact, studies have shown that your 40s is often the “low point” of a persons life. Which was my experience. The late teens can be dangerous - and the onset of mental illness in your 20s can precipitate suicide. But for the average joe, the 40s is a low point - none of the optimism of youth yet not willing to accept that you’re old. At 50, I finally started to be grateful just to be alive. The 40s were the worst though - and when I sunk into sever depression and hopelessness.

Yes the forties were awful. I had the dreaded midlife crisis and acted stupid and felt so hopeless. That’s when I had my famous episode of running away from the mental hospital in bare feet and that little gown that ties up the back. Fifties have been better so far.

Yeah, the suicides that happen when someone's in their 60s and older are sad. That person gave life a chance for 60-plus years and still decided life was not worth living.

I'm waiting until my mother dies. Life is pointless and agonizing.

I attempted in my 40s. Now in my 50s I’m happier and more carefree than ever. I feel for everyone who has suffered that deep depressive state. Hang in there - it gets better!!!

Yes, a woman I worked with a few years ago killed herself last year. I was actually devastated. She was fun and smart. I don’t understand how it got so bad that she couldn’t deal with life anymore. I know she got a divorce, and I’m sure that played a big part in it.

My father tried a few times when I was a kid. First time I was probably around 4 or 5. We were at my grandmother's house, visiting. My father set the car on fire and said he was going to get in it. I barely remember it, but I remember standing across the street, watching the car burn and the firetrucks arriving.

He threatened it a lot after that. He lost his job in his mid 30s and was battling severe depression. He mows lawns for a living. He shut himself in the garage with a bunch of lawn mower engines going and tried to die. My sister was the only one home. She tried to open the garage door but found it locked and grabbed my brother's bike to frantically pedal to the middle school where we all were watching my brother play baseball. I'll never forget the sheer terror in her voice as she screamed, "Daddy's shut himself in the garage and is trying to kill himself!" We rushed home and my mother unlocked the garage door, then started slapping him around as he was lying on a trailer bed, a mask over his face (Guess maybe he was hoping she would find him in time). He then got into his work van, drove a few miles away, opened up all these cans of pesticides in the van and tried to kill himself that way. The police caught him before he could finish the deed. They arrested him. A few weeks later, he came to the house with a gun and tried to kill my mom because he knew she was cheating on him. They finally took him to a mental institution where he met the woman who would soon be his next wife.

In some ways, I wish he had succeeded. He's completely crazy and still, some 30 + years later can't get over my mother divorcing him. He's just a very sad, narcissistic old man who had no business having 4 kids. My mom's the same. Both are batshit crazy and don't give two fucks about their kids.

A close friend of mine killed himself by taking a bowl of mixed meds, drinking a big glass of vodka and then putting a bag over his head and ending it. I was out of town working and he called me to tell me that he had been fired from his job and that he was going to kill himself. I thought I had talked him out of it by reassuring him that I could help him find another job and that killing himself over that job was just not the answer. I really didn't think he was serious about committing suicide. Told him I would call him once I was finished with work and back at the hotel. I called and called and called and he never answered. He had killed himself shortly after our phone call.

R81 - sorry to hear. It is so sad that people like that can have kids. Congrats on not going down the same route.

Family friend had a blood transfusion during surgery in the early 80s, after a leg amputation. He contracted AIDS as a result. This was in Alabama, before blood screening for AIDS virus was routine. He put plastic on the walls around his bed (to help those who would clean-up) and blew his head off with a shotgun.

O please. Get your head out of your ass, OP. Suicide is never a bad thing. It is preferable to the suffering that many people go through and that can never be assuaged.

^^ You type sociopath.

R86 You are a hysterical Mary! cuntopath.

MY aunt, my uncle and my cousin.

I tried killing myself in my twenties because I knew life could not get better. My parents hated me for being gay and the guys who I was attracted to were not attracted to me. And no I was not chasing guys who were way out of my league. I guess I thought I was a 7 but was in reality was a 2. Thick ethnic features and already bald in my teens.

Anyway I stuck a razorblade deep enough in my wrist to draw blood. I never saw anything so red in my life as it started to ooze out of my white skin. I then felt myself overwhelmed by nausea and collapsed on the floor and went into a kind of shock lying there conscious but completely dazed. I eventually was strong enough to pull myself up and clean the blood off my wrist.

It was such a harrowing experience I've been too chicken to try it again knowing that my body itself will fight me every step of the way. And no life has not gotten better. You just figure every day is one day less. And I kid you not my father was disappointed I was not successful.

[R89] that’s so sad. I am sending you love through the Internet. ❤️❤️😢

R89, I really hope you get help. It's hard to be in your teens and 20s. I hope you can get past what you're going through. I tried to commit suicide as young as 13. This, too, shall pass. Talk therapy helps. (Not everybody, including me, can tolerate rx drugs. But anti-depressants do help a lot of people.)

Thank you R90 and R91 for your kind words but I've gotten to the point where I see people who have succeeded at suicide as courageous and brave and somebody like myself as the old joke goes not even good at that. My ultimate failure.

A work colleague of mine killed himself in the workplace about six years ago. He brought a handgun into the office. He wrote an email to the whole organization and identified a number of company leaders by name, saying that they were overworking the employees. He hit the send button and then put the gun in his mouth and pulled the trigger.

No one thought of him as depressed and it was a huge shock. It took months for things to get back to normal. I went to the services and even though it felt weird, plenty of people had good things to say about him. I was still processing all of it and I know some people were angry at him, because his final message and suicide did not make anything in the workplace better; his credibility died with him.

Enough time has passed now that when his name comes up, we don't really mention how he died, and remember more of what we liked about working with him. Suicide is rough, and could be considered selfish, but I think it's forgivable.

About 20 years ago I was waiting for a meeting to start, and was reading the NYT when I got to the obits and saw an obit for a friend I'd lost touch with. He'd become a big deal in the art world, moved to Berlin and became a heroin junkie. He hanged himself.

Hey guys, I found a YouTube channel, "gymbgpro," very homoerotic, comments are hilarious. My guess is that YouTube will soon take it down or make you sign in and prove you are an adult. For now, though, it's available.

I m sorry r89. 💕💕

Please know many here wish you the best. Don’t take your parents’ reaction to how God/Allah/The Creator/Brahma created you with anything more than a grain of salt. (I assume their reaction is based on religious grounds). You are a worthwhile man.

My former best friend from childhood shot himself in his early 20’s. He had been doing various drugs. His parents told people it was an accident, but word got around.

My mother’s female first cousin climbed out her SRO hotel window in NYC and dropped 12 stories. I ended up identifying her corpse. She’d been an alcoholic for years.

A young woman in my apartment building in Brooklyn. Couldn’t seem to get her life together, despite a loving husband. She did a lot of alcohol and drugs of various sorts. Jumped off the roof of the building.

These last two influenced me to get sober, which I have been now for nearly 34 years. But, in sobriety, I have personally known over 9 people who have killed themselves, women and men, by shooting, hanging, overdosing, and jumping.

At some point, with some therapist, I realized I’d tried to kill myself 3 times before the age of 15, but never told anyone. God knows there have been plenty of reasons to do it since. I just haven’t. No idea why. I certainly don’t look forward to a diseased, solitary end. So I could off myself someday.

The story isn’t over yet.

"guess I thought I was a 7 but was in reality was a 2. "

That statement applies to more people than you realise lol. Anyway, take care of yourself.

A cousin of mine handed himself in his bathroom. He was facing financial ruin. His children found him. They tried covering up how he died. My family (full of big mouths) couldn’t help but leak out the truth at his own funeral. lmao

I have another cousin who went to purchase a gun and was planing to blow her brains out in her psychiatrist’s office. She had it all planned out and wrote how she wanted her funeral to be. She was hospitalized before she went through with it.

I’ve always questioned my grandmother’s death. She died in her 20s, had given birth to two children she was forced to give up and the family wouldn’t talk about how she died. TB was the official cause of death but then a family member close to her said that she died from a broken heart. Bipolar disorder run rampant on that side of my family my half sister tried to kill herself, too.

A cousin of mine hanged himself in his bathroom. He was facing financial ruin. His children found him. They tried covering up how he died. My family (full of big mouths) couldn’t help but leak out the truth at his own funeral. lmao

I have another cousin who went to purchase a gun and was planing to blow her brains out in her psychiatrist’s office. She had it all planned out and wrote how she wanted her funeral to be. She was hospitalized before she went through with it.

I’ve always questioned my grandmother’s death. She died in her 20s, had given birth to two children she was forced to give up and the family wouldn’t talk about how she died. TB was the official cause of death but then a family member close to her said that she died from a broken heart. Bipolar disorder run rampant on that side of my family my half sister tried to kill herself, too.

R98 Exactly. God bless you, sad cunt.

My best friend’s piece of shit boyfriend shot himself in front of us in 2006. For a while, she blamed me and our other friend because we were getting her out of his home after he beat her black and blue and as we were leaving he pointed a gun at his head threatening to pull the trigger if she leaves. He was always threatening suicide whenever she had the guts to leave him so my other friend and I told him to go for it, not thinking he would ever do it and he did it.

The gunshot was really loud and the three of us just stood there processing what just happened. I couldn’t get myself to turn around and see him. After about 2 minutes my friend started to scream and my other friend called the police. I don’t feel guilty about it. I was honestly relieved. I always thought he was going to kill her one day so I’m glad he took that opportunity away from himself.

She was in therapy for years and seems to be doing really well and the 3 of us are still good friends.

R102 that is the funniest fucking made up story I have ever read on here. Did the blood get all over your classy pant suit? Thanks for the laugh, cunt.

Too bad he never took out all three of yous with da same bullet. Now that would have been excellent.