Have you ever sneezed and accidentally shit your pants?
I'm embarrassed to admit this just happened to me. I'm not an eldergay yet, I'm still 39 and look 28! Maybe it's because I'm taking Alli and had some sharp cheddar nachos earlier (yes, they were delicious at the time).
It started so innocently... AHHH-CHOO!!! And SPLOOOOSH THE FLOODGATES OPENED, followed by cursing and running for the bathroom to unleash the remainder in the toilet and then clean off in the fucking shower.
It reminds me of the time, as a junior high student, I ate a mayonnaise and cheese sandwich before choir practice and as we were on the bleachers a few hours later, I let out what I thought was an innocent little fart and IT WASN'T INNOCENT. People around me were wrinkling their noses and I escaped to the school restroom where I took off my pants and tried washing myself as well as I could before the seniors came in and left immediately as soon as they smelled. I don't remember what happened after that.
I haven't been fisted, and I haven't visited the Bellagio, so wtf?
| by Anonymous | reply 19 | May 14, 2021 5:12 AM
|
We missed you, POO SHOES!
| by Anonymous | reply 1 | October 16, 2019 11:04 PM
|
When ‘gesundheit’ is not enough.
| by Anonymous | reply 4 | October 17, 2019 1:48 AM
|
Having fun, turd-for-spirit OP?
| by Anonymous | reply 8 | May 13, 2021 2:30 AM
|
Today I puked in the toilet and pissed myself at the same time.
It feels good to be honest about that.
| by Anonymous | reply 9 | May 13, 2021 2:42 AM
|
I take Jadenu (Deferasirox) due to a blood issue, and that's one of the side effects of it. It sends you running to the bathroom with explosive diarrhea for hours after taking it. Sometimes you make it in time (barely), sometimes you don't. Thank goodness I work from home, I couldn't imagine dealing with this in an office environment.
| by Anonymous | reply 10 | May 13, 2021 9:27 AM
|
You’re a loose whore, darling.
| by Anonymous | reply 12 | May 13, 2021 11:05 AM
|
R11, I'm R10 here and I hesitated responding to this for that very reason. I just thought it would be helpful to know if anyone else takes this, and that was more important.
| by Anonymous | reply 13 | May 13, 2021 11:15 AM
|
Erna's ashes got SCATtered but she's risen again!
| by Anonymous | reply 14 | May 13, 2021 11:19 AM
|
Yes.
And that’s how that cunt Marjorie Taylor Greene came to be.
| by Anonymous | reply 16 | May 13, 2021 12:44 PM
|
