Moo! Here’s your Monday Morning Moo! Have a Great Week, Steers and Queers!

What a crowd at the concert! I could have stayed ‘til the cows came home. My favorite part was when the played “When the Cows Come Marching In”! Always a crowd pleaser.

Highlights at the link.

I didn’t tip them, should I have tipped them?

I’m writing a book. Oh, moo, excuse me. Anyway, it’s called “Locked in the Barn” by Girdie.

Moo, you heifers! Get up and “moo” and stretch! Good morning and good week!

Umph!

Locked out?

Moo,

They just stood there, it's not like they tapped their feet or anything.

They were overcome with emotion because nobody ever come to their concerts.

Usually their concerts consist of cowbells only.

R8, does anyone ever ask for more cowbell?

R9, Why does that sound familiar?

I should have said occasionally we get a ukulele accompaniment. And Rolf thinks he has a singing voice, but it appeals to refined ears only, IMHO.

Moo.

[quote] Cows look best in Fall colours,

Yes. With sweet potatoes, broccoli and a hearty red as accompaniment while look out the window as orange and red leaves tumble to the ground. Yummy!

You again! Rolf wants a word with you.

Careful! Rolf is a known nazi with a whistle. Sorry, boy. Patpatpat.

Rolf was Wehrmacht, regular army. And he’s an Austrian Shepherd, not a German Shepherd, just so you know.

[quote] I should have said occasionally we get a ukulele accompaniment.

From a moose wearing sash? Or a sash-warring moose?

No, it’s Carl who has the ukulele. Everybody knows that.

What do you think? I wanted to try life as a brunette.

That’s very nice, Phyllis. Did Roy do that?

He did. Here’s the full ‘do, but you’ll have to click. Photographed by Avedon, by the way.

Tres chic, Phyllis!

I liked you best as a blonde, Phyllis. Now you look just like Auntie Taco.

This was your best! Moo!

You’re going to have to change all your jewelry, Phyllis. You’ll want to wear more silver and less gold, as a brunette.

Good advice, r22. Here’s the “before” picture, snapped by LaFitte just before the shampoo.

Tank is right, of course. I just needed a change.

[quote] Photographed by Avedon, by the way.

You’re old, Phyllis.

Phyllis is a survivor. Leave her alone!

I want to know about this new spelling of Girdie. What’s that all about?

You are a very astute reader, Jane. I, too, have wondered about that. But I’m just a cow, and can’t be bothered with such hubbub, normally.

Here we go. Back to normal, and all is well with the world. Right as rain.

Phyllis, your neck just begs for jewelry.

Did that sad sack who posts on the Sunday suicide job thread off himself? I haven’t seen his posts in weeks.

[quote] Phyllis, your neck just begs for jewelry.

The turkey-like neck. The non-existent bosom.

Phyllis does need neck jewelry, it’s true, but first she needs a good sanding.

I hear Carl bewitched him off the ledge with some ukelele music, Constance. That pig is a treasure.

Aww no don't get all weepy, Melrose , you know how that congests your sinuses.

Mustard! Copious amounts of mustard snorts will cure Melrose. Get the powdered mustard, Melrose. You'll be the hit of the disco.

Mmmmm. Dijon mustard with beef sounds good.

No. NO! I mean, maybe,ok? But, NO!

Hans likes us with horseradish.

Well, I’m just not sure of that name, Memphis Mac. Someone ripped out the first “M” page from the Big Book of Cow Names (unabridged), so I am skeptical if it’s a pre-approved name or not. It doesn’t sound right.

You know you need to have a pre-approved name, right? I think you know. We have standards around here, bub.

Melrose, what do you think? (Also on the missing page.)

I “M” doesn’t work how about “G”?

"G" just let's in all kinds of trouble.

Gertie! Moo, dear.

I'm voting Yes to Memphis Mac. Have you seen his longhorns??

Hmm.

Well, welcome Memphis Mac, and Moo to you!

I don't trust this.

I don't trust this.

Ugly Bob?? Oh my. He only pops up as a doomsday oracle.

Who has twine? Butress your nests! Secure your eggs! Hide the clover and lock up the barn, Memphis Mac is back.

Moo! Good morning and good day! Shake off your blues and get to work!

This morning, free facials are being given by this random human person down at the north gate. You’ll need to show ID, so, sorry, Ferdinand.

Did UglyBob settle in? I see his name was preapproved by Muriel, who has low standards, I will add. She’s a work-around of the standard process. Did he get a buddy to show him around? Any volunteers? It can’t be Rolf, he’s busy with the sheep we bought.

Sheep? Sheep? When did we get sheep? Show yourselves!

I noticed a peacock wandering lakeside, too, Di’Jon.

No Moozart?

That human person is sanding down Phyllis right this very minute. Fascinating. All those neck flakes, I thought it was snowing.

MOO

We got two sheep a few weeks ago, but it coincided with the collapse of the Republic, so cows, etc. didn’t notice. Priorities, bovines! Jesh.

I just packed up the lower 40. OMG, It was easier when I was a calf! I’m tidy because I don’t want to have to go out there in the middle of a Cat 5 hurricane. Those extra-wide lounge chairs were hard to come by, for some reason and I don’t know how we’d replace them.

This thread has now been closed to non subscribers by Mooriel. She must be lactose intolerant.

So many Gerties.

Gertie, Girtie, Gerissimo, Gervasandra...

I fear our old girl has bumped her head one too many times. Just last night I woke up to her staring at me not six inches from my face.

Penelope, what are you doing about this? You too, Cupcake.

And welcome, sheep, whoever you are.

And moo, many moos, of course.

It’s [bold] Gertie, [/bold] bub. Mistakes were made, plus there were some IMPOSTERS! And I have a lot of responsibilities around here, you know.

For example, we’ve moved over to a new thread, because these apparently aren’t smelling so “fresh”, after a while, I’m told.

Please move your mooing over to the linked thread. Thank you.

Urgent mooing excepted, of course.

Moo. I don’t do well with chaos and instability, Penelope. I hope you’ll have a word with Mooriel. I’m expressing cottage cheese and it’s because I’m stressed.

Margaret! Come follow me to the new thread, I’ll regale you with all the good gossip along the way. Ready?