POSTPONED: Dionne Warwick Edition

A performance chair is still a chair, even when I’m not sitting there.

She thought the gig came with a few cartons of Altria ciggiebutts.

How unprofessional.

And what?

She fell into the orchestra pit?

damn, Damn, DAMN!! I'm crushed because I wanted to see her so bad!

What do you get when you book Dionne

You get enough cigs to catch pneumonia

When you do, she'll then postpone ya

I'll never book Dionne again.

Welfare check on the hotel tub?

Orcheshtra.

That photo — is she wearing joke shop chattering teeth? Painting over the nicotine stains with Liquid Paper? What IS that?

A night of class, huh?

But it doesn't state whether it will be high or low.

If people claim class, they ain't got none.

A NIGHT OF CLASS starring Dionne Warwick

Where is Miss Warwick to provide answers? The Datalounge is paging Miss Warwick!

I told you she’s a shady bitch.

She got confused and she took a flight to San Jose, someone told her the way .........

was looking into going to this concert with her and deniece williams and peabo bryson, but the tickets i thought were OUTRAGEOUS! 300 dollars plus for the best seats? uh, no thanks!...

Keep smiling. Keep shining.

You can always count on me. For sure.

Except this time.

Amex repossessed her dental implants

Bitches, don’t come for me unless I call for you.

The moment I wake up, that’s when I start to fuck up!

Did anyone check her room? She may have decided to take a bath.

The dejected ticket holders have been spotted leaving the venue.

All three of them.

If you’re walking down the street

And you see my name on the marquee,

Walk on by. Walk. On. By.

And take a message to Michael, message to Michael:

THE SHOW IS CANCELED. STOP.

It's all the promoter's fault for not meeting her demands of a case of Benson & Hedges and an ounce of Icky Sticky!

Miss Warwick, like Ms. Lauryn Hill, appears when the Muse permits.

True artistry cannot be mass produced like so many McDonald's hamburgers!

And they couldn't even get Mary Wilson as a last-minute replacement?

I like Miss Warwick’s hair.

Disappointing ticket sales so the promoter pulled the plug?

BTW, is it true that Deniece Williams' twin brother is named "Denephew?"

OP, why are you reposting LSA threads here, verbatim?

OMG, she was coming to ATL for this and a few of us considered buying tickets until we saw how expensive they were. This kind of show, with these stars is for some out door venue in the summer like a state fair, or some concert in the park schedule where you can get tickets for $30 or $50. Then there are those old converted movie house venues, with fewer seats, and they do nostalgia tours. What were they thinking?

That concert wasn't a "see them perform" concert.

That was a "pay homage" deal. Dionne can't sing worth a damn and both Peabo and Niecy Williams look like they've been embalmed.

I just ordered my Psychic Within Kit. Can't wait.

For a psychic, she's awfully unpredictable.

She'll sing for half a roach and a Rally's gift card.

Dionne completed a multi-week engagement at Bally's in Vegas last April. She is reliable when she is paid upfront.

Like a hooker?

Twenty for a frog's croack

Hunnert for an actual note, hussy

I needs to see the c notes before I hit the c notes.

“A NIGHT OF CLASS” CONCERTS POSTPONED DUE TO RACIAL THREATS

TO PROMOTERS AND STAFF

(August 26, 2019 – New York, NY) – A Night of Class concerts featuring Dionne Warwick, Peabo Bryson and Deniece Williams in New York on Friday, August 30th at the Kings Theater in Brooklyn, and on Saturday, August 31st at the Beacon Theater in Manhattan have been postponed due to anonymous racial slurs and threats of bodily harm to promoters and staff. According to a police report filed on Friday, August 23 just after 6 p.m. in Atlanta, Georgia, anonymous text messages of racial slurs and threats of bodily harm towards the concert promoters, their family and staff members were received shortly before vandals slashed the tires of transportation vehicles and tampered with sound equipment. Additionally, the concert scheduled for the Altria Theatre in Richmond, Virginia, on Sunday, August 25th was also postponed. All three concerts will be rescheduled to ensure the safety of all staff and audience members. Everyone involved greatly apologizes for the inconvenience.

# # #

Well.

Apparently the Proud Boys didn't like her phrasing in "I Say a Little Prayer" and they're still sore about it.

Bullshit!

Bitch skipped out on paying her dealer so now he has put a hit out on her old ass!

Miss Warwick will be performing in Brooklyn tomorrow night at the Kings theater. She will have no problem scoring good weed in that neighborhood. I expect the theater will be lit.

Those are some blinding white TEEFS in OP’s pic.

It was sabotaged by Donna Summers.

R28-Mary is doing hand claps and back up vocals for Miss Warwick.

Miss Warwick has been conspicuously absent here so shit got real, girls.

Mary's doing even worse gigs than Dionne.

Mary is not known for her dancing...

I could have my friend Jerry take the stage for Miss Warwick. He thinks he’s Dionne Warwick and needs to get out of the insane asylum for a few hours.

Hussy!

If you think this sounds suspicious, you’re right.

MARY! Mary signed on for Dancing With the Stars??!! We should organized a telethon for the poor gal! Maybe Diane could throw a few million her way. Will this impact her "Ramada Inn 2019 Tour"?

Mary is actually one of the bigger stars on the 2019 DWTS 2019 D-List cast:

Karamo Brown, Queer Eye star

Kate Flannery, The Office star

Hannah Brown, The Bachelorette

Lauren Alaina, Country singer

James Van Der Beek, Actor and '90s heartthrob

Ray Lewis, Former NFL linebacker

Ally Brooke, Singer

Lamar Odom, Former NBA player

Kel Mitchell, Actor and comedian

Sean Spicer, Former White House press secretary

Christie Brinkley, Supermodel

Mary Wilson, Member of the Supremes

Miss Warwick doesn't know the way to San Jose any more.

But she does know the way to the CPA.

Off topic but why do these people do the DWTS route?

How much does it pay? They all basically embarrass themselves on national T.V. Why?

If I remember right, when Belinda Carlisle did it the base amount was 200K. Depending on where you ended up in scoring you could earn more.

So even w/Belinda, who was first to go that season, she got 200K.

^^Exposure on a television show watched by.millions. The paycheck. Enjoyment of hard work and/or competition. A love of dance. To meet Tom Bergeron. Etc.

Anyone see Miss Dee's Vagina Slims laying around here?

Praise the Lord!

Blessings be!!!

The legs are truly the last to go.

No wonder she feels confident cancelling shows and not refunding tickets now.

I support everyone who beats the IRS

Oh, all right.

If you must know, I got a yachting gig.

The California Inland goes DEEP, babies.

And sometimes being taken gives a more brisk memory than getting what you think you pay for. The absence of me will burn more than my kisses.

Fucking chumps. Yes, baby. Ka-CHING.

I am now scheduling simultaneous gigs all over the planet. No show. No refunds. And lots of publish.

Ahead of the curve again.

She's rite, nobody gives a shit no more.

I shit cum back out of my ass!

^Damont

One can smell the "I'm the only black man here and you white faggots should get your throats cut" homeless creep at this little thread.

It is a sad case.

3 fucking months later and still no new date announced or any refund!

Is this normal??

Ask Ticketmaster Op.

Call the Psychic Friends Network to find out when that refund will happen.

Oh. Sorry. Somehow I missed this shit. BECAUSE I HAD OTHER THINGS TO DO THAT CAME UP.

Christ. Ungrateful people.

My REAL fans know that the ticket is WORTH SOMETHING on its own.

Re-fund? For what? I didn't show up but NEITHER DID YOU. So you fuckers owe ME.

She must have discovered it wasn't an AIDS charity she could shakedown for first-class tickets and 5-star accommodations.

Still no news on a reschedule OR refund.

DL to Dioone: “We got YOUR number, hussy.”

*Dionne

Detective LaToya is my Psychic Friend and she is ON THE CASE.

So far she has learned that Dionne was lured away by a carton of Pall Malls and 40.

*and a

"A Night of Class" starring Dionne Warwick???

That's like "A Night of Truth" starring Kellyanne Conway or "A Night of Cardio" starring Chrissy Metz.

I Know I'll Never Book Dionne Again

That's What Promoters Are For

Anyone Who Had A Ticket

That's What Refunds Are For

Do You Know the Way to Richmond (Evidently not)

Promise-breaker

Why does she look like a female pimp on the poster?

What’s it all about....HUUUSSYYY?

Her son is her entire band (playing a Casio VL-1 keyboard) and couldn’t get it out of hock in time for the show.

Don't make me over, assholes.

You need to change that hate to love, mother fuckers.

And I'll have you know we also have a kazoo and a tambourine in our band.

Those nostrils are spreading like Shaun Mendez’ sphincter.

Has Dionne rescheduled her “Night of Class” yet? Last night was probably a night of grass

I wish she had more of a sense of humor.

She would have called it "A Night of Fucking Class."

Cissy told her to snatch those ticket sales and run like a thief in the night!

More like A Night or Grift

*A Night of Grift

Her Christmas album is available though!

R92 That is a "Sister, Imma gonna beat the SHIT outta you!" smile if I ever saw one.

How Christmasy!

A Night of (Low) Class

"Don't Make Me Show Up!"

My uncle met her once...he was disappointed. My mom loves her music but thinks that she’s uglier than sin.

R96, I caught your uncle trying to sneak in the fire door and I aimed my heel right up the center of his fat ass.

And I see the family re-semblance.

And your mama.....

Shit. Too easy.

I am as beautiful as ever, all the way to my marrow. What's left of it, anyway.

And as for re-funds, you assholes need to read the fine print. You paid for prefunds, and the money comes to me no matter what I dee-cide to do. Don't hold a dee-va to your pissy little standards. I condescend to notice you.

Unless you got some Mau Mau Wowie or some of those little chewie things like they sell in Vegas. A couple bags of those little bears and I start to FEEL it.

That outfit is classic Dionne

Dionne, such a cuntrag.

R96 why was he disappointed? Did she tell him, “I got your number, hussy”?

R100, She was rude and entitled. He was an employee at the Electric company who was sent to the venue where she was performing to repair the lights in her dressing room. He said that she acted quite self absorbed and had the nerve to ask him if he knew what he was doing...by that time he’d been working on his job for over 25 years...and when he was done, she didn’t even thank him. And she laid out someone at the theater, some underling over some trivial shit about the curtains onstage. And she had no makeup on and he said that she looked like a man.

Wow - what a bitch. Shocked!

I bet your uncle doesn’t listen to her songs in the same way anymore.

She does look like an angry black dyke.

I've told this story before, but one of our runners at the law firm I work at was an assistant to Miss Warwick.

He told me that everyone calls her "Miss Warwitch" behind her back.

Anyway, she stopped by our offices one day. And our managing partner made a big deal of introducing her in the lobby by saying, "I'm excited to have visiting us today a very talented and famous singer. One of my favorites. Everyone, please give some applause for Miss Diana Ross."

Miss Warwitch was NOT pleased.

LOL!

Thank God Diana Ross never heard that story. She *really* wouldn't be pleased.

Patti LaBelle has more money at age 75 than she ever has before, a successful food products company, a gorgeous home and is beloved by everybody. Miss Warwick, by comparison, sleeps at the Salvation Army and sings at hobo camps for food and marijuana.

It should be the other way around, since Dionne was one of the most successful female singers of all time. I guess she pissed all of her money away. It also didn't help that she was nasty to everybody and burned a lot of bridges. Patti, on the other hand, was always frugal with her money and was nice to people.

Dionne was a nice singer in her day. She didn't have LaBelle's voice though. She smoked it all away though (like Nippy) and it was gone by the end of the '80s. Diana Ross' voice, though never amazing, has held up surprisingly well. She sounds better than Dionne these days.

Dionne declared bankruptcy a few years ago, didn’t she?

I know that AIDS non profit group she raised funds for, BEBASHI, wasn’t that pleased with her grifter mentality. Most of the money raised, originally for educating people of color about HIV, went towards the expenses of Miss Warwick and her entourage. Five star hotels, restaurants and first class airplane seats...wasn’t she sued for this?

Yes, R108, all true.

I think at some point she declared Brazil her spiritual home and moved there. I suspect the distance from the IRS helped.

From last year

Too bad, because I really enjoy a lot of her music. Another reason to not be eager to meet those who you admire. I met French skating heartthrob Brian Joubert at Skate America fifteen years ago...as my friends and I walked up to him to introduce ourselves, he started to pick his nose. Mon dieu!

R27 and....what’s actually....*in* a McDouble Patti Combo, anyway?

With some celebrities, the trailer park or ghetto is impossible to escape. Despite incredible amounts of money and opportunity, they end up right where they started. Dionne is the poster child for bougie ghetto celebs.

Dionne has always personified a lot of ghetto stereotypes.

It's hilarious that a woman so rough-around-the-edges sees herself as the embodiment of "class"

I think that Dionne wanted Barbra’s career...movies as well as singing. She made this awful film called SLAVES with Ossie Davis...her movie career was over before it started.

Dionne has been looking a little frail lately, I know she's old but is she ok?

Well, whaddya know...a copy of SLAVES....POOR DIONNE WARWICK

Just got an email stating tickets will FINALLY be refunded as her NIGHT OF ASS has been officially canceled.

Only took 6 months...

She couldn’t find her teeth.

The photo of her has been photoshopped beyond belief. She hasn’t looked like that in YEARS. Her white hair is fetching though.

Her dentures look nice though 😁