Death and Depression

You'll probably get more spiced poisonous snark here OP, but I sympathise. Try a chat line or hotline if you feel desperate. By all means, try any other avenue or trickery to obtain some help in the meantime. Try to live for simple pleasures, live in the moment, and keep your head on. Death and old age is inescapable; better to make your peace with it. My father has now been diagnosed w/ the dreaded Alzheimers, or for all they really know could be mad-cow or something worse, and I live abroad. A cousin, my mum's favourite nephew just died from cancer. No one ever said it would easy. Elaborate on your house concerns for us a bit, as sometimes taking care of tedious day-to-day business can provide a respite from what troubles us in the mind. Taking care of business and soldiering on can often be a good distraction. Hope you're feeling better soon!

Sounds like you are making self-defeating choices. You are not taking ownership of your missed appointments. You are setting arbitrary boundaries about your willingness to take medication and you are reaching out to an Internet site of "pointless bitchery" for assistance. These are not the actions of someone who wants things to get better.

I probably sound like a prick but it comes from someone who specializes in self-defeating behaviors. I hope you find some care that alleviates some of your issues.

Mortality is the fact of our lives. Accept it. It’s part of the cycle of life. Grow up.

OP, depending on a movie to snap you out of clinical depression is an exercise in futility.

Only one med for bipolar, yet you admit to self-destructive behavior and depression. You need at least a complimentary drug, OP, to help with things. And to get back on track with therapy (perha po s a different counselor?). Go to the ER if you have to, to accomplish this. Don't delay!

OP, can you get a different therapist. I seems cruel to deny further appointments because of a couple of cancelations. A therapist should be more sympathetic.

"I have serious problems with my house and my job. "

Take action to fix those first. Being homeless and jobless will only make things worse.

OP, do you have a LGBT center in your city? They usually offer free counseling services.

If you can muster the energy, call your doctor’s office and challenge that canceled appointment clause. One of the symptoms of depression is being overwhelmed and unable to meet even minor obligations. If they don’t understand that and make accommodations, they’re unprofessional and should be reported to the medical board.

I can offer two suggestions, though I understand it can be hard to undertake.

First of all, try and get out for a walk. Put on some headphones with an audiobook, and just walk for half an hour per day. Jen Sincero does a great audiobook called "You Are A Badass" - I highly recommend it. Walking will help increase your oxytocin levels, which in turn should help you mentally.

Second, go and find a good brand of magnesium; Naturemade is a good brand, because they are USP certified. Take 250mg to 400mg once daily. There are actual studies that show magnesium can help treat depression. And as someone who suffers, it's helped me a great deal.

What do you take for bipolar disorder? Lamotrigine is known to raise the mood more than the other mood regulators.

I take lithium. I tried Latina recently and had bad reactions.

Small steps at a time, OP. Try to find another place where you can get therapy since that one can't be used for a year. If not therapy, then somewhere you can talk.

Take a walk outside. Around nature if you can. Go to a museum. Clear your head for an hour or two. Enjoy life for every bit as you can, it's what makes it precious.

As for your house and your job, those problems need fixing. One at a time, but you need to do it.

Come see me at the Help Center!

I have bipolar and take Lamictal; can confirm what r10 said

Don't want to make things worse OP but quite a few of the cast of 'Keeping Up Appearances ' are now dead.

Both Rose's ( Shirley Stelfox & Mary Miller ), Onslow ( Geoffrey Hughes ), Daddy (George Webb ) and Councillor Mrs. Nugent ( Charmian May).

Bit of an unlucky show for the actors.

R15 glad to see our sister Pat Routledge is still with us at 90.

OP, what kind of crap insurance do you have that cuts you off for two missed appointments? Certainly not one in the US. Is this what we have to look forward to under National health insurance? Go to the ER.

[quote]I tried Latina recently and had bad reactions.

Of course you had a bad reaction! Latina is a fucking illegal alien: you should have reported her to ICE or better yet, Donnie Two Scoops! You should be glad she did not join MS-13!

Seriously though, you probably meant Latuda. Is that the case?

My understanding is that lithium lifts your mood just enough so that you don't want to commit suicide. It's pretty good at that. Lamictal/lamotrigine on the other hand lifts your mood just enough so that you're in an okay mood a couple weeks down the treatment (my GP would tell you 6 months, but what does she know?). Just like anyone else actually.

Side effects I have on lamotrigine are eye accommodation (in that respect I felt like I aged from 40 to being 50 and needed glasses) and maybe a somewhat worse word/name recall at the highest dose (400mg/day). That's it. If I were you, I would suggest this option. That did the trick for me. What is your dosage R14, if I may ask?

OP Hope things are better for you this evening. Since so many are recommending certain drugs, I know many with bi-polar who have had great success with Effexor and Depakote. Perhaps it's time to get off the Lithium.

Thoughts and prayers.

Put fake melania into twitter, it had me howling

^ rogue melania too

You won't find help because there are two types of depression, clinical and situational.

Clinical depression is an actual medical problem, like bipolar is. It needs a medical treatment.

Situational depression is not treatable with medicine because it's not a medical illness. For example, if you're depressed because your mother died, that is a situational depression. It is caused by the fact, your mother is dead. Nothing you can do, can bring her back to life, so until you learn to deal with her death, you will always be depressed.

You can either bitch moan and whine or you can actually DO SOMETHING about it. If you can't see someone, start by seeking out free resources, go to your library and get books on learning how to cope with problems.

Finally go out and get a second job. This is occupational therapy whereas you will busy yourself earning money, this will allow you to pay for a therapist out of your own pocket. The more you dwell on something you can't do anything about the worse it gets.

in other words, slavery is good therapy...

[quote] OP: How can I get out of this funk

Death, of course.

It cures almost everything.

Death is not as bad as you think.

I don’t mind death. I just worry about the way I die.

There is more than one doctor or clinic to schedule an appointment with. Go to a new doctor rather than go untreated.

And maybe you just need to talk to a social worker. They can help you identify the problems with home and work. Just figure out how to change them.

Death is natural, most people don’t go in pain and it’s nothing to dwell on.

Find something to live for. And that’s a job, a loved one or a hobby. It’s NOT spamming Datalounge with O’Neal threads or redundancies.

I’m reaching out to people but sometimes at 3am DL seems to be the only one I can talk to.

I ignore the O’NeAl threads but I remember Joan Collins calling him her best lover.

Are you drunk or high, r30?

Nether that’s my problem.

Focus on something else. Paint, read a comedic book, cook something new. I get in these spirals, they suck but just focus your energy on something else.

go volunteer to help people. it will change your life.

Sorry to say therapists are a total waste of time AND money. After lawyering, the most fraudulent profession in America. I've always been plagued by depression and fear of death. Don't know how to escape it. However, what has helped me is: walking briskly, exercising and training, taking ballroom dancing lessons. Keeping the body active can help combat depression. On the other hand, there is no successful way to deal with the fear of omnipresent death.

Have you seen a Psychiatrist? Normally, Suicidal Ideation comes from certain mental and/or personality disorders Sometimes overthinking can be overwhelming causing spiraling of soul-stirring emotions. The first step is realizing your thought process is destroying your well-being. Trying to stay afloat, with a self-depreciating mindset can be difficult. Your Therapist is giving you a wake up call to start taking ownership for bad choices. Own them. Take a walk. Meditate and hopefully seek some help. You got this.

Self-limiting behaviors. Re-read your statement, OP, focus on all the ways you’ve put up blocks to various ways to help yourself, or receive help from others. Good luck.

Spend time around kids and animals.

Karate or kickboxing can be amazing ways to vent your negative emotions without hurting others. There is power in kicking and/or punching at a boxing bag. If money is an issue, many gyms prorate fees based on income.