I have a crush on my straight next door neighbor

He likes you more than he likes his girlfriend. Stick it out, Mary, and you'll get your D.

You realize “shaved head” means bald?

I find it incredibly hot, R2.

Muscular and buzzed hair is sexy as fuck! To me, at least.

Oh, and he almost never wears a shirt.

Sounds like he was not cool wiith it, but dies nkt want to be a bas guy, so he let the girl sic on you.

Eh, I used to have a crush on an absolutely gorgeous straight friend. The gf started giving me the stinkeye when she realized, but he enjoyed the attention and was secure enough in his sexuality to not worry about it. OP, do you really care what this guy's girlfriend thinks of you?

You really don’t have anything better to do than hang out and drink with this guy?

I think you'll have liver damage before you can suck his cock. Move on, auntie.

[quote] do you really care what this guy's girlfriend thinks of you?

Only because he continues to be "playful" with me, in front of his girlfriend.

It's weird, because I think he does it on purpose - a) to get attention from me and b) to annoy her. He really seems to enjoy seeing us both spin our wheels.

[quote] You really don’t have anything better to do than hang out and drink with this guy?

I actually enjoy hanging out with him. He's funny, interesting, PROGRESSIVE, and he has a lesbian sister. We have a lot in common.

Unfortunately, I think I'm confusing friendship with attraction, which is why I fucked up in the first place. Straight guys like to just hang out, talk and drink to make friends, whereas a lot of gay guys will drink and converse to eventually hook up.

It takes a lot of self control for me not to just throw myself at him, lol. He's totally my type, except that he's straight.

[quote] he almost never wears a shirt.

[quote]It's weird, because I think he does it on purpose - a) to get attention from me and b) to annoy her. He really seems to enjoy seeing us both spin our wheels.

Sounds like a narcissist. That's the other reason he's not "mad" about the offer to suck his dick. He already knew - and he likes that you want to suck his dick he has all this power over you - yet you have zero power over him.

Sounds like he’s just a cool guy who likes you as a friend but ... isn’t interested. Sounds like he’s also a straight up guy who doesn’t play games. So, he tells his gf everything because (this part’s important) she should always hear everything from him, and only from him.

You kind of fucked up and you shit on your own doorstep. You deserve the malocchio.

Did you spend part of Saturday night with him, OP?

Jesus you sound so desperate, op. A couple of beers and you hit on a straight guy? You sound like the ugly girl under the bleachers in high school who let the football team bang her in turns.

I don't think most of you realize: straight men tell their wives/GFs everything, unless it was about another woman.

Women are their conduit to feeling, seeing, sensing, and reacting to everything and everyone in the world. 99% of straight men are woefully underdeveloped in this area. They can't do it for themselves, and it's usually not the way they relate to other men.

You have to treat straight men like the feral children that they are.

This is so white trash (shirtless drinking on the front porch) that it belongs on Maury Povich's show.

Oh he's thinking about it, OP. Rest assured.

Just let things play out and one day his li'l missy will be out of town ... .

I disagree. If Straighty was at all open to the possibility, he never would have told the GF.

Telling her ensures that he'll never take OP up on the offer, regardless of whether he's tempted or not.

[quote]You deserve the malocchio

I learned something new today!

He’s a narcissist.

Next time he invites you to drink beer on his front porch, tell him you don't have time because you have to suck a dick on your front porch. A dick attached to a muscular, shaved headed, 40-ish gay guy, obviously.

You asked him for a blow job knowing he has a girlfriend. She's perfectly right to be wary of you. Appreciate the fact that you two are still friendly, and stop fantasizing about him, it isn't going to happen.

If he told his girlfriend, he’s most definitely not considering it. It’s never going to happen, OP. Just act normal.

Grow a pair and ignore this a-hole. The fact that he told his girlfriend left you looking like a pathetic idiot, so he really doesn't deserve your time of day.

Find something better to do.

Get some gay friends, OP.

If I were the girl friend I would ban your thirsty ass from the porch.

I would treat you just like a slutty female.

Does he let his junk hang out when you’re having beers? Like on the other thread?

[quote] If Straighty was at all open to the possibility, he never would have told the GF. Telling her ensures that he'll never take OP up on the offer, regardless of whether he's tempted or not.

This was my assessment after it happened, which is why I've been trying to avoid him ever since it happened about a month ago.

[quote] Did you spend part of Saturday night with him, OP?

No, but I went shopping for water and groceries on Saturday.

When I got home, I was struggling with the water because it was pretty heavy, and he started shouting at me "hey, do you need help?'

I ignored him pretending not to hear/see him, and he comes up behind me and goes "BOO!"

This is kind of a running joke between us because he always catches me off guard and scares the shit out of me every now and then.

So I was like "ahh!" and he said, "Do you need help?" And I replied, "No thanks, I've got it."

HOWEVER, his girlfriend was with him out on the front porch, and she was NOT amused.

I'm telling you that I honestly try to avoid him nowdays, but I think he felt bad about everything that happened. I also have a sneaky suspicion that his gf is talking some major shit about me, and that he also feels bad about that.

But in my head I'm like, "Just leave me alone!" I really don't want any more trouble between us, than there already is.

[quote] You asked him for a blow job knowing he has a girlfriend. She's perfectly right to be wary of you.

So this is what I mostly feel bad about.

Because after I propositioned him via text, he played it down and said "You're drunk, go to bed." But he also texted that he would never cheat on his girlfriend. I was pretty persistent up until that point, and that's when I did a 180 and immediately apologized and ended the conversation.

I must add that part of our conversation earlier was how much I thought this girl was better for him than his ex-wife, who was a total fucking nightmare. I actually really like her, and I don't know what came over me. I was just horny, I guess.

[quote] Does he let his junk hang out when you’re having beers?

He mostly only wears his basketball shorts with no shirt and no underwear.

This is part of the problem.

Although I'm sure he would be wearing this no matter who his neighbor was, and it's not just to "entice" me. The guy just likes being comfortable.

My issue is really only that he told his girlfriend. If he kept his damned mouth shut, it wouldn't be a problem at all.

Does he have an athletically inclined nephew in his late adolescence, OP?

Asking for a friend.

You sound EXHAUSTING, OP.

[quote] Does he have an athletically inclined nephew in his late adolescence, OP?

No, but he does have a young son and daughter who he pretty much gave up after the divorce, lol.

The ex-wife said that she wanted them, and he said "Okay!"

[quote] You sound EXHAUSTING, OP.

Trust me, I am. And I know it.

OP, get a dog, take up karate or knitting, read a book, find something to do.

OP is the guy that sends dick picks on Grindr right out of the gate when you have "Don't have the first pic you send to me a dick pic."

OP I think you should:

1) get a sexy wig, a slutty dress and fuck me pumps.

2) next time they're on the porch you go out on yours wearing what's on 1) and carrying a bottle of beer.

3) If he calls you ignore him, act like you need to cool down and pour the beer seductively all over your body.

4) go back in your house.

This shit needs to be escalated.

Is it possible he told the girlfriend as a prelude to having a MMF with you, but she was jealous and said no way and hates you for that?

So why not just be totally honest with him OP - tell him that you really fucked up, you’re very embarrassed by it, that you respect him and his girlfriend; and while you still want to be friendly in a neighborly way, you think t world be best for all three of you if the two of you don’t hang out the way you had been. That way you don’t have to go on avoiding him and stressing about everything.

Own up to your bad behavior, honestly apologize and move on.

I kind of love R32.

I’m enjoying the shit out of this thread even though

THIS. NEVER, HAPPENED.

Text the girlfriend and tell her you want to eat out her snacks. That way you proposition both of them. Let us know how that works out.

[quote] Text the girlfriend and tell her you want to eat out her snacks.

I only have his number. And I wouldn't have sex with her even if she said yes, because I'm not into that.

You've been played, OP. He set you up. This guy loves pitting people against each other, fighting over him. He now has a means of keeping his GF off-balance, right on his doorstep.

R32, the first thing that came to mind when I read your post, was this....

Mary, you're just sad and pathetic.

I have a "mild" crush on my neighbor. He's absolutely beautiful, But he's married, and has a little boy. I'm just nice to him and his family.

Agree with R39 and whoever upthread said the cock teasing, white trash (shirtless, beer guzzling on the front porch? Really?) neighbor is a classic narcissist. Narcissists can not stand to be ignored. Ghost him and he'll come begging for a blow job and more. Don't give in right away. He needs to be punished for gleefully tattling to the bitchy GF.

The thing about this is, you said:

"But he also texted that he would never cheat on his girlfriend."

That's very interesting to me. He didn't say he wouldn't want a blowjob from you - he said he wouldn't cheat on his girlfriend. So in other words if she's not in the picture in future, he's totally down for you to suck his dick like you're drowning and his balls are full of oxygen.

You should also supply a pic for us to see if he's worth playing the long game for.

Sounds like you fucked up a good friendship with your stupidity, OP. Blame yourself, not the girlfriend, and learn from this. Maybe ask yourself why you’re so quick to blame the girlfriend. What exactly did she do? You’re the one who can’t respect boundaries or control yourself when you drink too much. Get a fucking grip.

I never say “this is why they hate us,” but, well...you’re a walking stereotype and not a positive one.

This is literally why most straight men won’t be friends with gay men.

R48 is right. The gf feels the way a lot of straights do. They think all gay guys want their man. You played right into that. At some point she’s going to make him drop you as a friend. I’d tell her you fucked up then make yourself scarce for a while.

Another Troll thread?

Is R47 a psychic? How did they know to agree with R48 before they posted?

I meant R46

[quote] OP. Blame yourself, not the girlfriend

I never blamed the girlfriend. I said that I think she's nice.

I blamed my straight guy neighbor for being an idiot, and telling his girlfriend that i texted him!

He actually SHOWED HER the text. And I quote: "Come over, and let me blow you." Yes, it was a momentary lapse of judgment, but I texted it. Yes, I did. I can't take it back.

But he didn't have to tell her that I texted him, or even show her the actual fucking text. HE was the idiot for showing it to her, and that's why there are problems between us now.

I always assumed (because I have hooked up with numerous straight guys on various apps) that straight guys were discreet. Why would you tell your significant other that someone wants to suck your dick??? Apparently, straight guys are neither smart, nor discreet.

This is why I'm pissed and annoyed with HIM. Not her.

[quote]He actually SHOWED HER the text.

Please don't tell me that you're the one that supplies all the booze etc. when you hang out, because he probably makes fun of you when you're not around if he told her about what you said to him.

We bring our own booze to the "party," R52. Lol.

He has his beer and I have my own. We drink different brands.

He drinks shit beer and I drink the good stuff. I always rag on him about it, but he likes what he likes.

So it’s his fault that he told the gf about YOUR inappropriate behavior?

They are in a committed relationship, right? Of course he would tell her. The straight guys you may have met before are discreet because they were also looking; they have something to hide. This guy doesn’t.

Own your behavior, deal with the reality of the situation, and move on from the friendship. Cordial neighbors.

OP made the major mistake of hitting on a guy with a girlfriend and not a wife.

This is the time that the that the girlfriend must bring her oral A game to the relationship. She's gotten him to move in together, she's almost at the finish line for a ring. The last thing she now needs is OP messing up her plans.

OP made the major mistake of hitting on a straight guy period.

Time to move, OP.

It's also time to stop the self-defeating behavior of crushing on a straight guy. Just think, if you had an attractive gay friend, you could tell HIM you want to suck his dick and have a chance of success. But that's not really what you want, is it? To be happy sucking dick?

He's told all his male friends about you too.

[quote] He's told all his male friends about you too.

Be my guest. ;o)

hehe

Straight men don't have anything nice to say to gay men unless they're bullshitting or lying in order to somehow get something out of you that will never be sexual in nature.

You need to start going after other gay guys and get the "straight fantasy out of your head".

"straight fantasy" rather.

I knew a guy exactly like this. He even said that when he was in jail he never went gay.

I sucked it.

OP do you actually enjoy this friendship other than lusting after him? If you do enjoy spending time with him, get over potentially sucking his dick and be his friend. If the entire pretext of the relationship is that you hope to one day suck his dick then you should move on. Either way you might want to invest some amount of time hanging out with people who enjoy men sucking their dicks.

Time to move OP.

[quote] The thing about this is, you said: "But he also texted that he would never cheat on his girlfriend."

[quote] That's very interesting to me. He didn't say he wouldn't want a blowjob from you - he said he wouldn't cheat on his girlfriend.

Ding ding ding, R44. That's exactly the way that I interpreted it.

He actually told me that he has been hit on by gay guys before. He didn't elaborate, though. He just left it at that, and I didn't ask him about it.

He also works out at the gym a lot.

To me, that all screams that he either likes the attention, or he is cool with getting a bj - as long as he's single.

Whatever the case, he's NOT single, so I'm not going to waste my time.

This is why I stopped paying attention to him after the incident.

OP doesn't understand how most straight men think about gay men. We're objects of ridicule to them. He refuses to accept it. Showing the gf the text indicates that he probably laughs at you when your back is turned.

[quote]I blamed my straight guy neighbor for being an idiot, and telling his girlfriend that i texted him!

How is he the idiot in this scenario?? YOU hit in HIM. You = gay, him = straight and not single.

He did NOTHING stupid or wrong. You might not like that he values his girlfriend over his neighbor, but you’re an idiot for not assuming he probably would.

Seriously, do you accept ANY blame for this? You hit on someone with a partner. You’re an idiot AT BEST.

Has OP mentioned his age? I stopped crushing on straight guys in college. You only make this mistake once or twice before you realize it’s never worth it.

Do you guys giving "real" answers here really BELIEVE this story? Or are you just having a good time with OP's made up tale that's a good outline for nifty.org?

[quote] Do you guys giving "real" answers here really BELIEVE this story? Or are you just having a good time with OP's made up tale that's a good outline for nifty.org?

While I don't believe this story, I know enough gay guys who have done things like OP is describing. I have a friend from college who is very wealthy, good looking and always single because he is always working some angle to get to suck off the straight guy. It is openly discussed why he doesn't just get a rent boy.

Op here. 100% truth.

Why would I make this shit up?

It's real, and I don't give two fucks what you think.

I just needed to vent about my asshole neighbor.

About 90% of my relationships with straight guys are problematic. I would say I have at present one decent friendship with one and he's into the arts.

Of course this is probably fake, R69. Still worth it to fuck with idiot OP.

[quote]Why would I make this shit up?

Because you're a fucking attention whore?

[quote]I just needed to vent about my asshole neighbor.

Once again: he is not the asshole in this story, and neither is the gf.

I don't give a fuck if you believe me or not.

Unlike 95% of you twats, I actually have a life.

[quote]Unlike 95% of you twats, I actually have a life.

Which is why you spend your off time drinking with some straight guy who's laughing at your drunk texts with his girlfriend instead of finding some guy who is actually into other guys. Been there, done that.

[quote]He's told all his male friends about you too.

[quote]Be my guest. ;o)

They don't want to fuck you, OP.

OP - at this point you’re really trolling since your “actual life” is spent lusting after and striking out with unattainable straight guys. And then blaming everyone but yourself.

Not OP here, but I have posted things in my life that actually happened only to be told I was making it up. Why is it so difficult to imagine what OP said actually happened? It sounds plausible and I know many guys who have been in similar situations.

Next time, wear your thinnest muslin caftan when you go out to drink beers with him, and when things heat up, present hole and deliver a well-placed "YUM!"

[quote]Unlike 95% of you twats, I actually have a life.

Um, you’re the one posting about offering blowjobs to rednecks, dear. And getting turned down, no less. Not exactly “a life” one envies, TBH.

The straight guy has the best of both worlds, A girlfriend and a guy who puts him on a pedestal. Yes, he likes pushing and pulling on both of them. OP, you shot yourself in the foot big time. The straight guy's ego is swollen up like a balloon.

Why would OP hit on someone he knew was in a relationship?

Isn't that kind of weird?

been there OP, except my straight buddy asked me to blow him (repeatedly), his girlfriend didn’t mind (less work for her), and no alcohol was involved.

OP, the girlfriend has told everyone too.

If I were the girlfriend you would already be banned.

You are Jack Nasty!

I don't think you're the one who should be saying 'REALLY???' OP - I think that's the straight guy in a relationship you hit on, and his girlfriend. Of course he told her, why wouldn't he? you mind a fool of yourself and now you;re trying to project it onto him. Why would he keep this a secret from her?

^^ 'made a fool' not 'mind'

I'm really struck by just how little self-awareness OP has, blaming his neighbour and calling him an idiot etc., when it was him he clearly did an idiotic and embarrassing thing. My guess is that this is in fact real, that OP is in fact very embarrassed, and that he posted about what an 'idiot' his neighbour is in the hope that DL would collectively reassure him that he (OP) did nothing wrong. Clearly this has not happened.

Honestly, OP, at this point you would be best just making an apology to the girlfriend, in writing perhaps and with a gift, and promising that it will never happen again. This may go some way to making the situation a little better.

OP, your R74 post is fucking HILARIOUS!!!

I just thought about you, OP. I’m out walking the pup and a neighbor with a shaved head WAVED AT ME from his work truck! Think American History X but beefier. I of course nodded like a lady. He’ll be mine before the year is out!

Is OP a drug addict or an alky? Honest question. They live in their own reality oftentimes and blame others for their shitty behavior. Op is angry that the man told his GIRLFRIEND with whom he is in a RELATIONSHIP that the fruit next door hit on him and he’s angry. It’s mindblowing the mental gymnastics. THEY are a couple. YOU are a guy he sometimes drinks with. Stop watching so much porn, you idiot.

OP, the problem here is you don’t understand straight men.

In most cases, it’s “bros before hos”. You’re not a bro. You’re the cool gay dude next door. This guy is into his girl, so he’s “hos before bros”. Everybody knows this guy: he’s always around and ready for stuff when he’s single. As soon as he’s got a girl, disappears. She’s got him wrapped around her finger and his balls in her purse.

That’s what you need to know about almost all straight men if you’re going to be friends.

Here's the thing, OP - Don't shit where you eat.

There really should be a breathalyser on phones like they're thinking of putting in cars so you can't text when drunk.

good luck

OP, you have as much right to suck that cock as she does.

She is NOT the legal owner of that cock.

You should take this to Judge Judy

OP, the issue is simple : you fell in the narcissistic trap of a straight guy. he is using your text to secure his relationship and test his girlfriend's attachment. in their circle of friends, you are the butt of every joke, because that's what most of us are to the straight men we confide in... before you find yourself in a dangerous situation, learn what self-confidence, boundaries and gaslighting mean... this guy is not your friend.

I disagree, R94. The neighbour could have been OP's friend, if OP had respected the normal boundaries of friendship and neighbourliness. When you know someone is not sexually available to you, either because of their r'ship status, age or sexuality, and you still hit on them, you are a predator.

R94 : Truth

[quote]When you know someone is not sexually available to you, either because of their r'ship status, age or sexuality, and you still hit on them, you are a predator.

I think one only becomes a predator when he forces himself upon another person. I have a straight friend whom I've always found sexually attractive. He knows I'm gay. One night we had a long discussion about life in general and I told him I thought he was hot and that if he ever decided to switch sides to please let me be the first to know. He asked if I was hitting on him, and I told him yeah, I guess I was. He was cool with that, and while things of course never went any further, my "hitting on" him made no difference in our relationship. I don't think what I did was in any way predatory.

R97 - you didn’t text him an offer for a blowjob - repeatedly. You were having a conversation & buried your “advance” in a pile of hypotheticals. Very different.

I don't think OP was being predatory, and it sounds like it was one text not repeatedly texting. But he was being an idiot and disrespectful to his neighbour's girlfriend, and his neighbour by assuming he would be willing to cheat on her even if he had wanted to (no reason to think he did want OP either). He also has no right at all to expect the neighbour to keep it to himself.

Poor people are funny!

This is the kind of thing you stop doing as a teen, usually.

R97, what about the men in Britain who groomed vulnerable girls for sex trafficking? They didn't force themselves on these girls, but they were predators.

[quote] He's a muscular, shaved headed, 40-ish divorced dad who has a new girlfriend.

Yeah, stick it out. If she's "a new girlfirend," maybe she won't last.

Str8 guys loooooove those scenarios, of gay men proving all the stereotypes str8 guys hold about them true! now your friend can say "this is why we hate them" without even being homophobic...

She sounds like a bitch. If I heard some woman hit on my boyfriend I wouldn't glare at her because she wouldn't be a threat.

R104 is correct. He’s going to breadcrumb you for all eternity.