Why can't fraus get over the death of loved ones

I think you’re the outlier, not them. Sometimes it just haunts you (pun intended) when someone dies young.

OP, you are dead inside.

Stealth racebait thread or just another shortbus DL regular?

I managed my Dad’s death really well. Then my 10 year old niece died the next week. I managed, though I try not to think of her, because that’s still very sad. My Mom died two years later, and I mourned for about 3 years. I still miss them and think of them often.

Why does everyone need to do what you do, OP? And who is forcing you to look at these fraus' FB pages or listen to their stories?

"Death Hagging" is a legitimate Lifestyle Choice.

In the 19th century, they used to have picnics at gravesites, to memorialize the dead.

I don't think the issue is with the "fraus." I think the issue is that many of us who post here buried double-digits of friends or acquaintances by the time we were 30. I think people who went through that have a very different relationship with death than most other people.

I feel sad when people I love die now, but I don't get twisted into knots about it. I don't even get twisted into knots over my eventual demise. I view myself as a pragmatist, but I doubt I would have that "pragmatism" if I didn't see so many loved ones die so young.

When people form love relationships, their brains go thru a rush of oxytocin. This is the same neurotransmitter involved in mother-child bond formation. It is extremely powerful and the death of a loved one, especially a child, is the loss of that oxytocin bonding.

Perhaps, op, you have too little, or they, too much.

Are you trying to be funny, OP? If so, it’s not. If not, it’s pathetic.

OP is an idiot or demented. Not sure which

R9 whatever. No one should ever mourn a drug dealing scumbag for 25 years. Nor should anyone mourn an alcoholic who chose to drink herself to death. You are wrong on those accounts. Has zero to do with bonding or attachment.

And the subject of this thread is fraus not men mourning those who died of aids. Do not pollute the topic you ghouls.

Pretty cruel OP

This thread says says much more about the OP than the topic chosen.

Amazing how much we can reveal of ourselves!

Buck would never...

Wahhhhhh

You'll never understand OP.

But take comfort that no one will ever mourn you.

R12: No one should ever mourn a drug dealing scumbag for 25 years. Nor should anyone mourn an alcoholic who chose to drink herself to death.

I think you’re wrong. People aren’t born as a drug dealer or alcoholic. The survivors mourn the lost potential of the person, as well as their death.

OP, I think you’re a psychopath, but I mean that in the nicest possible way. Seriously, I’m not saying you’re a bad person. You just seem to be missing the ability to empathize. A lot of people are similar. It’s not uncommon.

I pity you OP.

[quote]In the 19th century, they used to have picnics at gravesites, to memorialize the dead.

How gauche.

OP, what happened to you? What made you so cold and hateful?

R17 quit projecting, cuntbag. People should be measured on what they did what their life. Drug dealers, alcoholics, homeless people have no value. Neither do you.

I bet OP's mom can get over his death in 22 minutes. Hooray, death to the bitch son!!!

R22 coming from a retard like you, that attempt at an insult is almost impressive.

[quote] R21: People should be measured on what they did what their life.

I think that people should be measured, aka judged, as little as possible.

OP = Dora Dumbfuck

So boring.

Oh, go fuck yourself, OP / R13. Have an FF and an ignore.

R12 R13 R21 R23 = bitch OP fuming at her stinking mouth like a dying rabid skunk.

It's not uncommon for DLers to make massive generalizations from small sample sizes.

So "Why do Redheads put ketchup and relish on hot dogs?"

I know these two red-headed sisters and they BOTH put ketchup and relish on hot dogs....."

etc. and so forth

[quote] No one should ever mourn a drug dealing scumbag for 25 years. Nor should anyone mourn an alcoholic who chose to drink herself to death.

Who put you in charge of deciding whom and for long random people should mourn? Why do you imagine it's any of your business? I

I think friends and family actually tend to grieve harder and longer when someone dies under sordid circumstances, for the reason r17 posited: the dead people's wasted potential and the loss of the possibility that they'll ever turn their lives around and redeem themselves.

A friend of mine with a dark sense of humor was talking about people who die from auto-erotic asphyxiation. The family invariably says “oh, it was just a suicide”. Haha.

And then she died. The family said it was a heart complaint. I’m pretty sure it was actually an opium overdose.

you mean like Michael Jackson, Prince, et al>?

Cant imagine mourning my mother for three years like R4. A few weeks maybe, if that

I'm not a frau, OP, but you are most certainly a cold cunt regardless of what's between your legs.

R29 wasted potential! Scoff. So all the millions of worthless homeless opioid addicted low lives are wasted potential? Drop dead you bleeding heart. You are wrong in every way. No one should ever mourn scumbags including you.

If you love someone who died, you will grieve the rest of your life. The question, instead, is how will you also live your life?

[quote] R32: Cant imagine mourning my mother for three years like [R4]. A few weeks maybe, if that

I didn’t weep for three years. I don’t even recall, now, but I remember thinking it was three years before I felt like my old self. Since my Dad was dead, it was a huge change in my lifestyle, since I often visited them. I was really lucky in having good parents.

It was a long time before I could tell someone that she died, without choking on tears, though.

R35, I’ve heard it said that you don’t ever “get over it”, but you can learn to live with it.

[quote] [R29] wasted potential! Scoff. So all the millions of worthless homeless opioid addicted low lives are wasted potential?

In reality? Who knows? But in their family's eyes, I'm sure many are.

[quote] You are wrong in every way. No one should ever mourn scumbags including you.

No one should ever mistake his silly opinions for facts, including you. It's simply not your business whom other people mourn, or for how long. But perhaps you will take comfort in the likelihood that not a single person will waste five seconds mourning you.

Not my proudest fap, but...

R37...I’m hoping you’re right.

OP jumping on the good ol frau bandwagon. Mourning the loss of loved ones and having a tough time getting through it is not exclusive to fraus. Plenty of human beings who have hearts and souls grieve for a long time. When you are somewhere rotting, perhaps somebody will even mourn for you.

Not an American here, so I read up on the opioid crisis in the US. I was amazed to read that 100,000,000 people are in chronic pain and two thirds of people who take opioids do so for pain management. That is nearly a third of the population. These are ordinary people, surely. And when the govt tightened up on prescriptions, they turn to heroin to replace the pain med as a cheaper alternative. So these ordinary people are now heroin addicts, buying suspect drugs on the black market. It could happen to any of us.

I had RSI for about 6 weeks, from computer overuse. I was in such pain, I was walking around crying. Luckily I was fixed by 2 ultrasound treatments from a physiotherapist, because I would have done anything to find relief.

OP sounds sick. But I do agree with him on one thing - I don't like how people often pretend that the departed ones (with the exception of dead children) were some sort of saints. That "De mortuis nil nisi bonum" mantra never made much sense to me. Even wife-beaters, drug addicts and other scum quickly get canonized by their relatives.

My dad recently died - he was a wonderful person but he happened to be a raging alcoholic and he was one of those people who become a nasty piece of work when drunk. I delivered a speech at his funeral and I also quickly touched that subject. I didn't roast him or anything but I didn't speak of him like he was a saint either. But then again, none of us is - we all have our own flaws and that's perfectly normal.

[quote]...Second is the door of forgetting. Some wounds are too deep to heal, or too deep to heal quickly. In addition, many memories are simply painful, and there is no healing to be done. The saying 'time heals all wounds' is false. Time heals most wounds. The rest are hidden behind this door.--Patrick Rothfuss

OP, my warm, loving mother died in 2018 from Alzheimer's and vascular dementia, from which she had suffered for ten years. My brilliant dad now has dementia. I will care for him full time until he dies, as I did my mother. It is a long, hard, often bitter process of grieving both the person they used to be, and the person YOU used to be.

I would imagine it's similar, watching a beloved family member slowly destroy themselves with drink, drugs, or violent lifestyle, caring for them as well as you can, riding herd on them as much as you can, living them as hard as you can . . . and feeling utterly helpless as you see that person slip away from you.

Have some empathy, OP; and I hope you never will know that kind of pain.

Scumbags, the dregs of society are not worthy of any sympathy.

Fraus. Lol.

first, you never get over the death of a child. never.

what you don't understand is that those people don't see their loved ones as a drug dealer or an alcoholic but someone they loved and shared their life with. Grief is different for everyone and they are entitled to do it their way.

When I was younger I dreaded the thought of my parents dying, but as they got frailer and I got older the reality loomed closer. As peers lost their parents it became more of an organic inevitable thing, and so when it happened I was incredibly sad and of course grieved, but I wasn't inconsolable.

It made me realise however how incredibly awful it must be for those who lose their parents young, or lose a child (unthinkable). There's kind of an unfinished nature to that loss that will never be healed.

I suspect those who seem to move on from it may just be hiding their grief, or possibly (like the OP no doubt) be somewhat sociapathic by nature.

OP sounds as if he's on the verge of a rage-a-holic killing spree, if he hasn't already started.

You will be first cunt lol.

R48 you assume too much. Many folks hate their parents and are glad when they croak.

I miss mine. I guess I always will. Thats ok, I guess. I like when I dream about them, and get to see them again, even if only briefly.

I miss mine, but their early demise due to lifelong smoking gave me a life of freedom. Swings and roundabouts, I guess...

Same R52.

LOL.

I had a cousin who was regularly beaten by his drunken father and his mother, a financial prisoner to a 60s marriage, had no choice but to look away.

He moved out/was thrown out at16 for getting a girl pregnant and six months later he OD'd.

For 50 years my aunt went to church DAILY, had vigil candles burning 24/7 in front of his faded Polaroids in her bedroom.

For some, it's not the grief...it's the guilt.

Guilt. LOL. Only Catholics feel guilt. You should have no regrets about shit.

Tell me about it, I was over my sister's death before I struck the final blow

If a frau's cat dies, she will grieve for 2000 years. That is the way of things.

As a staunch anti-natalist, I have absolutely zero sympathy for humans and their ridiculous grieving practices. Birth, and more generally “life”, are not sacred or righteous. Humans bring children into the world for extremely selfish reasons, and then fight each other for many of those same selfish reasons. Then they get worked up over death. And it all repeats. It’s an insane cycle.

R9 said it best.

When it comes to relationships, women mourn, men replace.